Chapter Five: Home Remodeling

Chapter Five: Home Remodeling

When Calvin woke up, he scratched a bug bite on his head and jumped onto the computer. He grabbed the credit card and looked up “How to Paint Walls”. He found a good YouTube video and clicked that. When the guys voice started playing on the surround sound, Hobbes yawned and awoke. He checked the clock. “It’s 7:30, Calvin.”

“Hmm…good to know.”

“You’re normally sleeping in.”

“Yeah…that’s great.”

“Has something been bothering you?”

“No…why do you ask?”

Hobbes rolled his eyes and walked over to the computer. “What are you doing?”

“Huh? Oh, I’m just learning how to paint walls,” said Calvin. He gestured at their room. “This place is a dump. The wallpaper is peeling, the wood looks boring, and we don’t even have a carpet! Do you see what I mean, Hobbes?”

Calvin paused the video, got up, and started pacing. “We’re been spending time and money on food, and only food!” “Except for the surround sound and the computer.” “Ok, but that’s nothing. We need to buy more stuff,man!” Hobbes nodded. “So we’re going to do home remodeling.” “Exactly. Tonight’s my night, so I’m going to spend this sleeping, if I need to get up early tomorrow.” He yawned. “Fix some breakfast, Hobbes.”

The tiger poured some milk into two bowls of cereal (Calvin’s being Chocolate Frosted Sugar Bombs and Hobbes’ being Frosted Flakes) and they settled down to watch the rest of the YouTube video. Once that was done, Calvin went back to sleep and Hobbes read comic books. “Gee” he said. “It seems so quiet when Calvin’s asleep.” He jumped out of his sleeping bag and saw a door to another room. He opened it and looked in.

First off, this room was a lot bigger. There was a dresser, a bed, a bathroom (so far they had been using public restrooms), a lamp that needed a light bulb, and a big space for a TV. A nice, big, 48-inch screen TV. Hobbes would have shouted out, “Whoopie!” but Calvin was sleeping.

So he went back into their room, which looked so tiny compared to the other, and began to move their stuff into the room. Soon his sleeping bag was dragged into a corner, the food was thrust along another wall, and the computer was put next to the sleeping bag. Hobbes curled up in the bed and went to sleep.

It was when Calvin woke up and screamed, “WHERE DID ALL THE STUFF GO??” that Hobbes realized the bed had no sheets, or a cover. He walked out by Calvin and said, “It’s in the other room.” He led Calvin to it and Calvin screamed again, but this time it was something unintelligible.

“What time is it?” asked Calvin, getting thoroughly excited. “About 9:00, am” said Hobbes, looking at his watch. “Augh! I’ve got to GO!!” Calvin cried, and grabbed the 5,000 bucks Hobbes had gotten out of the bank. Hobbes rolled his eyes and went to the bank.

Calvin tore through the bottom floor of the building, then zoomed past people walking around, and finally reached Standard TV & Appliance.

He looked at the TVs, then asked a person, “Does this come with everything?”

The person didn’t notice it was a kid asking. He said, “Yup. Everything. And if you buy satellite we’ll throw in free on demand and a fridge.”

“Sweet! How much?” “1,000 for tax and regular price.” “I’ll take it” said Calvin. “The cashier’s up front” said the man. Calvin reached up to grab the TV. He then lowered it carefully to the ground, and pushed it up front.

The cashier looked at the TV, then said, “Is this all?” “I want to buy satellite, too.” The cashier peered through his glasses at Calvin. “That would be 1,000 dollars for the TV and free year of satellite. After that, you have to pay 25 bucks every month.” Calvin handed it over. The cashier was impressed. “You get a free fridge and On Demand, too. The fridges are over there. Show me the one you want.” Calvn walked over and found a helper.

“What’s available?” asked Calvin. “Well, for the depressed, we have a talking fridge” said the helper. He pressed a button on the fridge and a cheery voice said, “Be happy! You’re alive, right?”

He then said, “For the tall basketball players, we have giant fridges— ” Calvin looked up at a fridge that towered high above him.

“And for the basketball players with kids, we have a giant fridge with an elevator.” Calvin’s eyes grew wide again. “I’ll take this one” he said to the cashier. “Hey, kid. You can’t carry those home by yourself.” Calvin shook his head sorrowfully. “No, I can’t. And my parents are out today.” “So, do you want these delivered?” “No, I’ll get a taxi. See ya later.” And Calvin pushed and pulled his things outside.

Hobbes was reading a comic book and eating Flavor-Blasted Goldfish when his w-t beeped. “Boy Genius to Fanged Terror, do you read me? Over.”

Hobbes picked it up and said, “I read you. What’s up, Ca-er, I mean Boy Genius?”

“I got us a TV, satellite, On Demand, and a giant fridge. Start making our former room into a kitchen, got it? I’ll help you out later, too. Oh yeah, it’s good we have really tall walls, because I got the biggest fridge. Over.”

“That’s awesome. What you need me to do? Over.” “I’m taking a taxi to our alley. I want you to be hiding behind the corner. Over.” “Gotcha. Over and out.” Hobbes clicked off the w-t and ran down to the alley corner.

Calvin said to the driver, “Stop here.” The driver helped Calvin lug out the TV and fridge (that they had to tie to the roof of the car because it was so big) and they set the items down by the corner. “That would be, oh, 5, young man.” Calvin handed over the money and as soon as the taxi was gone, Hobbes crept out. “Did you bring the rope and box?” “Yup. And I left our window open.” “You’re the best, Hobbes.”

The box, which was now made out of a huge discarded safe, carried the TV safely up to the window. Hobbes ran up and got the TV out. He put the safe out the window again and ran down to help Calvin push the fridge at least part-way in. Then they both ran up to pull. It took them a while, but they finally got it up.

When they stood it up, it touched the ceiling, which was many feet above their heads. Yes, even Hobbes’. “Now how big is this elevator?” the tiger asked as they stared up at it. “About my size. Don’t worry. You can still open the fridge. But I don’t think you can reach the handle.” It was about three feet out of Hobbes’ reach. “It’s ok. I’ll get what you want.” Hobbes nodded. Calvin tried it out by pressing a button and two doors opened. He stepped in and pressed up. He traveled up about 4 flights and reached the top. He then went back down and stepped out. “Well, it’s rather cold in there, but it works.” They began to load all the food in. When they were done, it was about two in the afternoon and they went to sleep.

They woke up the next evening to take a nice break. They turned on the TV, just like at home, and ate a lovely breakfast. They both smiled, thinking, I don’t think we’re in Kansas anymore, but I like it here in Live-Alone Land.