(A/N: well, the 2nd chapter came out later than I thought it would... and it was also longer than I expected it would be. Man, I just can't shut up, can I?

2nd week:

Monday

Today was absolutely scorching. If hell came on earth, and by some miracle we all survived to witness it, then this is how I’d imagine what it would feel like – except without the flying evil bats and cackling horned beings. Ok, so maybe it isn’t hell on earth. But it was pretty damn hot. And practice was torture.

I swear, what kind of ignorant idiot thinks that – oh hey, this is the perfect weather for the Regulars to run laps until they collapse due to heat stroke?

Isn’t Buchou supposed to be looking after our welfare? Then again, Buchou could have a hidden sadistic streak. He is friends with Fuji-senpai after all. Note to self: Fuji-senpai’s… Fujiness is catching. I’ll have to make sure to keep my distance from him.

Not that keeping away from Fuji-senpai is easy when he wants to be around you. That’s like asking a horde of monkeys not to take your pants when you’ve stuffed them full of bananas.

I hate monkeys. Sometimes I wish I’ve had a normal childhood. One wherein my old man didn’t think it’d be funny to stuff a five year old’s pants with bananas during his first visit to the zoo.

Anyway, I didn’t want to pass out after running laps – how many laps did we run? I lost count after 93. You know that ‘runner’s high’ that people are supposed to experience after running for awhile? Complete and utter BS. The only one who was enjoying himself was Inui-senpai, who by the way didn’t have to run – all he did was serve us those nasty concoctions he calls ‘shakes’.

Ah… I’m sorry. I have a really short attention span. Not that I don’t find you interesting. I mean, you always listen to me. And you never judge me. So what was I saying earlier? Oh yeah – I didn’t want to pass out after running so many laps that I ended up pouring my bottled water all over my head instead of in my mouth in an attempt to cool off.

I guess I looked pretty disgusting, all flushed, hot, and sweaty with my wet shirt transparent and sticking to my skin. Take in that picture for a moment.

Eew, right?

No wonder Tezuka-buchou couldn’t take his eyes off me the entire time with his mouth open. He’s really hygienic and sanitary. I bet his pores don’t sweat the same kind of sweat the rest of us guys do – cause I never smell any stink coming from him even after a really rigorous training session. Unlike Momo-senpai who can stink like a monkey’s ass in the middle of July.

Ugh. I hate monkeys.

I bet Tezuka-buchou secretes mineral water out of his sweat glands.

Anyway, after Buchou made show of how disgusting he thought my apparent display of… er… unhygienicness he excused himself and went to the bathroom. Then Fuji-senpai started laughing like Karupin would have laugh, if Karupin could laugh, one he gets the early bird.

Except Karupin wouldn’t have laughed, even if she could laugh, cause Karupin always ends up choking on the early bird. Those birds are massive you know, probably from always getting the worm, and Karupin’s just an itty-bitty darling of a cat.

(Bleh. I guess this is the reason why I don’t like talking. I’d embarrass myself too much.)

…Sheesh. Fuji-senpai, what the hell is so funny?

Tuesday

Kikumaru-senpai ‘glomped’ me today. If there was ever a person who was the embodiment of a glomp – which I’m sure isn’t even a real word, since what kind of idiot thinks that glomp would sound like a fantastic word?

Probably the same idiot who thought that chutzpah and effrontery could mean the same thing. Oh, and bombastic as well… no one ever uses the word bombastic. It sounds stupid. ‘Hey, how was your day?’ ‘Oh, it was bombastic!’

It sounds pretty fruity when you put it that way.

Anyway, as Kikumaru-senpai was glomping me, I felt something long and hard digging in my back.

Felt like a flashlight. Probably a flashlight. Think Kikumaru-senpai could be a boy scout? That’s the only excuse I can think of. Makes sense. Well, no it doesn’t. But for Senpai, it does, cause he really does things that don’t make sense, like acting like a cat when really, it can’t be cool for a guy his age to act like a cat, right?

I wonder why he puts his flashlight in his shorts.

At least now I know who to ask in case I’m caught in a black out with the Regulars.

And then afterwards, he excused himself to the bathroom like Tezuka-buchou did.

Wednesday

Kawamura-senpai screamed at me today. It went something like:

“OH, ECHIZEN-BABY! PLAY WITH MY BUUUUUUUUUUUUUURNING RACKET!”

Except he was asleep, so it couldn’t have meant tennis, unless he was dreaming of tennis in his ‘burrrrrrning’ mode, and there really wasn’t a racket in sight anywhere near him.

I was getting pretty curious, cause whatever Kawamura-senpai was dreaming about must’ve been a pretty intense tennis match – his face was all contorted and stuff and he was breathing pretty heavily. Is that how I look when I play those really long and hard tennis matches? Although, well, since I am the Prince of Tennis, I couldn’t have looked that bad. I bet I looked cool.

Oh yeah. Pretty cool.

I tried shaking him awake, and it must’ve took him a few moment to realize that I was his teammate cause he tackled me to the ground. Again. Kawamura-senpai in burning mode is PAINFUL. I’m getting bruises in places I didn’t even know existed.

Eventually, Fuji-senpai, who may not be as evil as I thought, pulled Kawamura-senpai off me, waking him up completely.

Turning an interesting shade of purple, red, and white, Senpai apologized profusely and excused himself to the bathroom.

Thursday

What the hell is up with that bathroom? It seems like all my Senpais are hurrying up to the bathroom when I’m around. Do I make them so sick that they have to throw up or shit or piss or something? Is it school food poisoning? Is there a urinary tract infection that, for some reason, affected all the Regulars, except for me?

I think that this is Freshman Discrimination. I seriously thought that the fact that I’m the youngest wouldn’t hinder any blossoming relationships between us.

(‘Blossoming relationships?’ That’s it. I’m going to stop reading fanfics, no matter how much I want to find out what else could have happened if Sasuke stayed in the Leaf village and didn’t go all psycho-crazy like his brother Itachi.)

I bet that there’s a super cool, secret Seigaku upperclassman Regulars’ club that meets in the bathroom.

I bet they’re plotting against me cause I’m the Prince of Tennis.

I have to find out.

Friday

Odd.

There’s nothing interesting in the bathroom that betrays the secret of any super cool, secret, upperclassman Regulars’ club hangout. The only thing that really creeped me out is that the bathroom walls are plastered with my pictures.

Maybe it’s a photo club?

No… that wouldn’t make any sense. The only two people I can see toting a camera around and taking pictures of unaware people are Fuji-senpai, because he’s a creepy, sadistic bastard, and Inui-senpai, because he’s a creepy, curious bastard.

I got it! Those upperclassmen are studying me! They’re trying to beat me and kick me out of the Regulars because I’m a freshman.

Well… it’ll be a cold day in hell when that happens.

(We’ve been over this. Hell. Hot. Heat. Cold. I need to find better figures of speech that doesn’t sound so… immoral.)

(A/N: Unlike Echizen, I happen to find chutzpah a very interesting word and am currently waiting for a chance to be able to use it in everyday vernacular. I also am looking for an opening to use bombastic while talking to my friends. Ennui was a little harder to insert, but I did it. See, that's what setting goals are for. It makes you feel extremely accomplished over the smallest things.

3rd chapter will come once I get to it. And I am trying to get to it as quickly as possible.

If you use the word chutzpah in your review, maybe I'll even updated more quickly. Or, at the very least, I'll be very impressed, if not slightly jealous.