A/N: This is a songfic to the song If You were Gay. Enjoy J Dedicated to Steve. Also, the spacing may be fucked up because I tried uploading it before and it became just one huge paragraph oO

"Kevin."

The oldest Jonas jumped and turned around to see Joe. Joe had his chin on his hands on the back of the couch. Kevin assumed he was kneeling behind it.

Kevin muted the volume on the TV. "Yeah?"

Joe smiled. "I just got home."

"So?" Kevin cocked an eyebrow. He so wasnt in the mood for Joe's mindless ramblings. Turning his back to his brother, Kevin turned the volume on on the TV.

"You'll never guess what happened to me on the subway this morning," Joe continued as though he were never interrupted. "This guy was smiling at me, and talking to me. Being real friendly."

"Don't care," Kevin yawned.

"I think he was coming on to me!" Joe exclaimed. "I think he might have thought I was gay."

"Joe," Kevin said suddenly. "I still dont see why I should care about some gay guy you met, okay? I'm trying to watch TV."

"You don't have to get all defensive, Kev, I was just -"

"I'm NOT getting defensive," Kevin growled. He turned the volume up with the remote.

"I didn't mean anything by it, Kevin," Joe said sadly. "I just think it's something we should be able to talk about."

Kevin rolled his eyes. "I do not want to talk about it, Joe. Go away."

"Well, alright, Kevin but just so you know..."

Kevin tried to look at his brother out of the corner of his eyes but he couldnt catch a glimpse. "Joe...?" Kevin asked in realizing his brother wasnt where he was before.

Joe appeared, snatching the remote away and turning the television off.

"If you were gay," he sang. "That'd be okay. I mean, 'cause hey, I'd like you anyway!"

"Shit, Joe! Go away!" Kevin cried, aiming a kick at his brother.

"Because you see, if it were me, I would feel free to say that I was gay! (But I'm not gay.)"

Kevin groaned and buried his face in the couch cushion.

"If you were queer," Joe said, jumping onto the couch beside Kevin. "I'd still be here. Year after year, because you're dear to me. And I know thatyou would accept me too if I told you today 'Hey, guess what, I'm gay!' (But I'm not gay.)"

"I'll kill you," Kevin said loudly. "Kill you dead."

"I'm HAPPY!" Joe went on, standing up. "Just being with you! So what should it matter to me, what you do in bed with guys?!"

"Joe, that is gross!" Kevin moaned.

"No it's not!" Joe beamed. He hopped on top of the coffee table and did a little tap dance before continuing.

"If you were gay, I'd shout HOORAY! And here I'd stay!" He gestured around them. "But I wouldn't get in your way. You can count on me," Joe sang, leaping off the table and landing on one knee in front of Kevin.

"To always be," he whispered. "Beside you every day, to tell you it's okay...,"

Joe got up and sat so close to Kevin their whole sides were touching. Joe touched his lips to Kevin's ear and sang softly, "You were just born that way, and as they say it's in your DNA, you're gay!"

Giggling, Joe got up and danced from the room. "But I'm not gay," Kevin whined as he looked down at the boner tenting his jeans.

"If you WERE gay," he heard Joe call from the kitchen.