Author's note: Explanation of this fanfic – Me and my friends roleplay as Hidan, Kabuto, Itachi, and Sasori on the 3D chat IMVU. One day, we got to talking about a threesome, since I was roleplaying Kabuto at the time, it was SasoKabuIta. And then we brought up Hidan, since I also roleplay him. This is one of my new fave foursomes :3 You may not like it, but this was written for me and my friends to enjoy and for all the other closet fans of this crack quad XD So, if you’re up for some crack and hawt sex, enjoy :D

Disclaimer: I do not own these beautiful men. But I roleplay two of them and love every single minute of it X3 Credits go to my friend who roleplays Sasori for the title.

He wasn’t supposed to get caught. It was a flawed plan to begin with, but Kabuto had hoped he could sneak past the Uchiha prodigy without being noticed. No such luck. Now he found himself pinned against a wall, a kunai to his neck and no possible way of getting around his opponent. “You were foolish,” Itachi hissed, pressing the blade against the medic nin’s neck.

Kabuto winced and smirked. “I guess so,” he replied with a shrug. “After all, I’m no match for the legendary Uchiha Itachi-san.”

Itachi’s eyes narrowed dangerously. “Why are you here, spy?”

“Orochimaru-sama wanted a report on Akatsuki. I couldn’t just tell him no, could I?”

The smirk on his face was irritating. Itachi pressed closer against him, drawing blood with the kunai. Kabuto’s gray eyes widened a fraction. There was a sound behind them and Itachi turned. Sasori was standing just a few feet away from them, out of his puppet Hiruko. Kabuto seemed confused.

“Who is that?” he asked before he could stop himself. He didn’t remember Orochimaru-sama telling him about any red-haired members of Akatsuki.

“You should know the face of your master,” the redhead said coolly.

Kabuto’s eyes widened fearfully. “S-Sasori-sama?”

“Bingo.” The youthful redhead seemed to glide towards Itachi and Kabuto. He came to a stop before them and glared at Itachi. “What are you doing with my subordinate, brat?”

Itachi, hating to be called a brat by someone who forever looks like a child, glared down at the shorter man. “He broke into the lair.”

“I allowed him entry.”

Kabuto was grateful for his master’s (well former master) sudden appearance. He could get back to Orochimaru-sama without delay, hopefully. “I was to give a report on Orochimaru-sama to you, Sasori-sama,” he mumbled, reaching into his back packet.

He gave the scroll to Sasori who read it through carefully. “Good work, slave,” Sasori murmured. Kabuto winced at the title. Itachi let Kabuto go reluctantly.

“Am I free to leave now, Sasori-sama?”

The atmosphere was tense. Itachi seemed ready to use his Sharingan on the medic nin at any given moment. Sasori had what he wanted, so he didn’t care really. Kabuto was fearful. He knew he didn’t stand a chance against Itachi and would prefer to leave as soon as possible. Then came the cursing. It wasn’t from anyone in their little group. It came from down the hall….and it was getting louder.

All heads turned as the cursing drifted down the hall towards them. “…fucking bastard piece of shit…”

Kabuto didn’t know who it was, but Sasori and Itachi seemed to. Finally, the cursing person came into view. He was a man with silver hair and what appeared to be pink eyes. But that wasn’t what was intriguing Kabuto. The man was attempting to pull on his Akatsuki cloak over his blood-soaked chest. But it wasn’t the fact that he was bloody that had Kabuto’s eyes widening behind his glasses. It was the fact that he had a gaping hole in the middle of his chest, making his organs quite visible.

Kabuto had never seen something like this. The other man seemed oblivious to the fact that his chest was bleeding. Sasori and Itachi were calm and planned to move out his way, but Kabuto wanted to study this man. Had he somehow mastered a jutsu for immortality? Just as he was walking closer, he tripped over a loose stone and tumbled into the other silver-haired man. It wasn’t the fact that he was now covered in blood. Oh no, he was a trained medical ninja. Blood did not affect him. It was the fact that his mouth ended up on the other’s somehow and now he found himself involuntarily kissing this strange, but attractive, immortal man.

The other roughly threw him off. “What the fuck?!” he cried, wiping his mouth as though he’d been poisoned. Kabuto was a little affronted. He wasn’t that bad of a kisser, was he? “Who the fuck are you?!”

Kabuto stumbled to his feet, blushing furiously but determined to be mature about what just happened. “I am—”

“He’s my slave,” Sasori spoke up. A chakra string wove around Kabuto’s waist and pulled him closer to the redhead. Kabuto had no time to protest as the puppet became suddenly protective of him. Itachi’s glare intensified. “Did you want something, Hidan?”

So Hidan was the man’s name? Kabuto curiously stared at him. “The fuck is wrong with your slave, puppet boy? He keeps staring at me like he wants to eat me, seriously.”

Sasori’s chakra string tightened around Kabuto. “He’s a medic nin. He’s probably curious about your wound.”

Hidan raised an eyebrow. “Seriously? Oi, kid, stop gawking at me. It’s annoying.”

Kabuto blinked and flushed red. “I just wanted to know how you can survive with that hole in your chest, Hidan-san.”

The other smirked. “I’m immortal, that’s how.”

Kabuto’s eyes widened. Orochimaru-sama had never mentioned this man before. Unless Hidan joined Akatsuki long after Orochimaru-sama had left. “That’s very interesting,” he mumbled.

“Don’t you have somewhere you need to be, Hidan?” Itachi suddenly growled. He seemed angrier than usual.

“Yeah, but don’t get your panties in a bunch, red-eye, seriously,” Hidan snapped back. “You PMSing, or what?”

Sasori gave Itachi a warning look before the Uchiha could jump the immortal man. Kabuto thought it was odd how Itachi was following Sasori’s orders. Since when were they close? And then Hidan’s face was suddenly inches from his own. He never thought he’d get so close to an immortal before. He was strangely beautiful; surreal; as if he didn’t belong near them.

“Your slave is fucking weird as hell,” Hidan growled to Sasori. “What’s your name, kid?”

“Kabuto,” he replied.

“You a virgin?”

The question caught him off guard and he spluttered embarrassingly. “I…I…”

“That’s so cute, seriously,” Hidan sneered. “He’d be a good sacrifice to Jashin-sama.”

“No,” Sasori hissed.

Jashin-sama? Kabuto wondered who that was but had no time to think before Hidan had licked his cheek. The sudden touch scared him and made him back away. Hidan smiled while licking his lips. “He tastes good,” he stated.

Sasori was very angry in an instant. He pushed Kabuto away towards Itachi before advancing on Hidan. His chakra strings extended around Hidan’s neck, choking him. “Never touch him again,” Sasori threatened. “Or I will take what little of your manhood you have left.”

“Fuck you, puppet!” Hidan spat. Kabuto watched as one of his intestines very slowly began to fall out of his chest. Normal people would look away, but he was fascinated. He wanted to lay this man out on his lab table and examine him from head to toe. His desire to get closer to Hidan must have become obvious to Itachi who was glaring down at him so much he thought he’d burn on the spot.

“Are you angry with me, Itachi-san?” Kabuto asked with a grin.

“We both know the answer to that, spy,” he spat.

Both looked over to the confrontation between Sasori and Hidan. Sasori had his knee between Hidan’s legs and was pressing himself further and further against him. And before anyone could say another word, Sasori had clamped his mouth over Hidan’s in a rough, bruising kiss. But Hidan was not about to be dominated. The chakra strings holding Hidan to the wall disappeared. He never broke the kiss with Sasori, pushing the smaller man into the opposite wall and hungrily kissing and licking him.

Kabuto stood in stunned shock. He didn’t know what do make of this. Hidan and Sasori were kissing each other as though they wanted to smother the other one desperately, and yet there was a strange sense of passion behind every flick of the tongue and every moan they made. Itachi seemed to be transfixed; immobile. And then he was striding towards them, prying Hidan away from Sasori before leaning down and pressing his cold lips to the redhead’s.

Now Kabuto was really confused. A threesome? Were they serious? He wanted very much to leave, since he figured his presence wouldn’t be missed at all. That was before Hidan decided to drag him over and place his bloodied lips on Kabuto’s. The medic yelped and backed away. The first time had been a mistake. He was not about to have this man touch him like that again. He was a future experiment.

He could hear Itachi and Sasori doing whatever they were doing in the corner as Hidan smirked and advanced on him. He’s going to rape me, Kabuto thought, suddenly very aware that he was in grave danger. He prepared his chakra blades. Hidan laughed cruelly and grabbed his wrist, forcing it above his head. He traced his pale finger down the side of Kabuto’s face before slamming his lips down on his again.

Kabuto didn’t move. He couldn’t. This man was strong, immortal, and unbelievably attractive, and hard to ignore. He moaned a little when he felt Hidan press closer against him. Even the fact that Hidan was still gushing blood and had a big hole through his chest didn’t bother him. He used his free hand to wrap around Hidan’s head and pull him closer. Kabuto wanted to try and see what this would be like with an immortal. His right leg wrapped around Hidan’s waist, bringing their pelvises together. Hidan groaned loudly as he pulled out of the kiss. His pink eyes had darkened with lust. They seemed almost red now.

“Fuck, you’re turning me on, kid,” he said smirking.

“He’s not yours to fuck, Hidan,” Sasori snapped from the other side of the room. Itachi was busy kissing his neck and removing his cloak.

“Have your fun with the weasel, puppet,” Hidan sneered. “The medic is mine.”

Kabuto was in no shape to object anymore. This man was intoxicating. His pants were dropped without his consent but he didn’t care. Hidan forced his legs to wrap around his midsection and in one breathtaking moment, Kabuto was filled by the other. He screamed out and clung tightly to Hidan’s back. His glasses fogged up as the thrusts against the wall became harder and faster and more pleasurable. “Hidan-san…I’m…I’m going to…” he whimpered.

“Shh, I know, kid,” he replied, thrusting even faster. Kabuto felt the tension suddenly build up and then release all over his chest and against Hidan. A few seconds later and Hidan came as well. He pulled out and let Kabuto slide down to the floor. Hidan was taking deep breaths, weak from the release and the blood loss. And then Itachi and Sasori were behind him, licking at the cum and blood on his face. Hidan turned his head and kissed Itachi on the mouth, not caring that he smeared blood all over him. Sasori knelt down towards Kabuto.

“Did you enjoy yourself, slave?” he asked, touching his silver strands of hair.

Kabuto nodded weakly. His mouth wouldn’t form the words. “He felt fucking fantastic,” Hidan breathed after releasing Itachi’s lips. “Kid’s in good condition.”

“Of course he is,” Sasori said matter-of-factly. “He’s my slave after all.”

Kabuto flushed a bit. “I…should return back to Orochimaru-sama…”

“Do ya really have to leave?” Hidan smirked.

The inclination was obviously there. He wanted him to stay; to be his fuck buddy. Kabuto would have none of that, no matter how good it had felt. No, he would leave and store this day into the farthest parts of his memory. He stood up, pulling his pants back on and looking over at Hidan’s still bleeding chest. “Would you like me to fix that up for you?” he asked.

Hidan’s pink eyes widened before he grinned. “Sure, why the hell not.”

Kabuto knelt down beside him and waited for the green chakra to come to his hands. Then he placed them over Hidan’s bloody chest and watched as the wound quickly started to heal up. Once he was done, Hidan looked good as new. He stood up and was preparing to leave the hideout when Hidan called him back. “You gonna come visit again, kid?”

“Probably not, Hidan-san,” he answered truthfully.

“Shame. I coulda used you for Jashin-sama, seriously.”

“Who is—”

“Leave, Kabuto,” Sasori growled. “Don’t start him on his religion.”

Hidan stuck his tongue out immaturely as Kabuto nodded with a bow and turned to walk away. His visit to the Akatsuki lair had been…interesting. He was able to gain more information for Orochimaru-sama now. He smirked as he walked out of the underground lair and into the sunlight where his glasses glinted. Yes, it had been a very…fruitful experience.