A/N: Bumped the update day up to Friday because that's becoming my Internet night in general. And it seems like more people are on Friday. And... because I've been told that's a good day.

Yes, I know today's Saturday. This was a recent decision.

Anyway, this chapter has an incredibly important development in it! BUT YOU'LL NEVER NOTICE WHAT IT IS. :D

That's about it, except, I don't think I've mentioned yet that I accept any and all criticism. So I'm saying that now. Just... you know. Even flames. Yep. Not gonna snip at you if you don't like the story. Would like to know what you didn't like so I can improve. Mmhmm.

Okay, TL;DR over, enjoy the chapter.

Well, now you are in trouble
Your timecard is a wreck
It's almost two past eight
I'll tell Nezzer that you're late
And he'll take it from your check!
Big Idea's 'VeggieTales: Rack, Shack and Benny', 'Good Morning George'

9:24 AM

"You want your arm back?" the guy said, tossing XR's arm and catching it again. The guy was tall and thin with a shiny black coat, wearing shiny sunglasses and a scowl.

XR nodded. "And if you would be so kind as to return my head to my body? I kind of need it there."

"Hellooo?"

He whimpered.

"Well, maybe I don't want to. Baby," the guy said, sticking his tongue out.

"Well, at least I have some common decency," he grumbled.

"Hellooo, XRrrr..."

"All right, fine! Keep my dismembered limbs, I don't even want 'em! So there!"

He opened his eyes. A trio of wide eyes fuzzed into view.

"Wha?" he mumbled, trying to figure out what had just happened. Where did the guy with his arms go?

"Late for wooork!"

XR blinked, realizing he could feel his arms. They were still attached. He must have been dreaming. He must have been asleep, then. That was logic.

"What time is it?"

"Nine thirty!"

He sat bolt upright, his eyes bulging. The LGM yelped and clung to the charger.

"WHAT?"

DEAD. DEAD.

HE WAS SO DEAD.

He took a flying leap out of the charger, completely disregarding the little alien holding on for dear life. It was a pretty impressive leap, for his level of co-ordination, and the landing wasn't too bad, considering, though he did swerve a little and almost hit an LGM (but didn't hit him, so that was okay).

The station was absolutely packed to the hilt with people this time of day, it was hard to keep up a mad scramble without flattening someone, but he managed to get to the launch bay without casualties (well, besides the one cup of coffee someone spilled when he careened into them. The person didn't get hurt though so that was okay too).

He ran in the direction of 42 and darted inside the ship, eyes bulging. He couldn't believe he was late. He hadn't even intended to go to sleep, he'd just wanted to be in the charger when the LGMs came in, because he usually was- they usually woke him up chatting to each other. Since they shared brainwaves, he wasn't sure why they needed to chat to each other, but they did nevertheless-

and then he collided with something large and solid, derailing this train of thought.

When he recovered from this brief shock he was lying across Buzz's legs. He stood up, dusting himself off, as his co-captain got to his feet.

"Hey, why are we always falling on each other?" he said.

Ignoring this, Buzz said "You're late for work, rookie."

"Oh yeah," he said, clasping his hands in front of him and looking properly penitent.

"Would you have any convenient excuses handy?" he said.

"No," he said, looking down.

"All right, then get yourself in the bridge," he said, turning away.

XR heeled beside him like a friendly, obedient dog, then, not happy with being reminded of dogs, went in front of Buzz a little for the sake of being contrary. Buzz quickened his pace a little so they were side-by-side again. XR dropped back so they wouldn't be anymore.

This is stupid, he realized, but... oh, whatever, he was-

Now Buzz dropped back so they were side-by-side again. Oh, now who was being stupid.

"So, what's on the table for today?" he asked.

"Well, now that you're here..." That was rubbing it in, and that was obnoxious. "...we can go on patrol."

XR nodded. Patrol. That had the potential to be a pretty low-key day, provided they didn't wind up getting all sorts of calls. In fact, patrol-only days were generally pretty boring. (Then again, in his line of work that may have been preferable to the alternative.)

"Okay," he said, and they entered the bridge.

"There you are," Mira said.

"Good morning to you too," he said, frowning and going over to his control panel.

"Where were you?" Booster asked.

"Me? Nowhere," he said.

Buzz sat down and fired up the ship. XR was too slow grabbing the wall this time and was flung across the room, screaming. He landed in Booster's lap.

"Hehe," Booster said, waving. XR half grinned, half grimaced up at him.

The ship stabilized and Booster set him down. He went back to his panel, smoothing figurative ruffled feathers.

"XR?"

He looked up. "Huh?"

Booster was looking down at him, worried. "What happened to your leg?"

XR blinked. What happened to what?

He looked down. Oh. Yeah. Dog. Funny, he'd forgotten all about it.

He'd also forgotten that lie he'd thought up about how he got it... oh, craters.

"Uhhh..."

"Wait, what?" Mira asked, leaning around the back of the chair to peer at them.

XR suddenly became very absorbed in adjusting his panel. "Oh, someone's stupid dog bit me."

"Sorry to hear that," Buzz laughed. "Might wanna make sure you get your tetanus shot."

XR just rolled his eyes.

"Oh, yeah," Buzz said with a frown.

"How'd you get bit?" Booster asked, hairless eyebrows furrowing.

"Oh, I... was on a date," he said.

"Oh, good for you!" Mira gushed (what, this was some big shock?) "Was- was she nice?"

"Oh, ummm..." Okay. Quick. Imagine up a girlfriend. Hot redheaded and... that was about as far as he got. Okay. Mira's question. "...sure. Nice. Kinda feisty."

"Feisty," she said, raising her eyebrows.

He nodded.

"What's her name?"

"Pa-" he started to say, intending to say 'Pamela'- but wait, Pamela was BOOSTER'S girlfriend. Oops. "-tee. Patty."

"Ah," she said. "Do I know her?"

"Nope." Cuz she didn't exist, but XR wasn't dumb enough to say THAT.

She nodded.

"I'm happy you found someone, XR!" Booster chirped. "Oh, but sorry about the dog bite."

"That looks deep," Mira said, frowning.

XR nodded. "Oh, it is."

"You should have the LGMs look at that," Booster said. "Can robots get infections?"

"I'd've gotten one long before now," he sighed.

Buzz leaned back in his chair, raising an eyebrow. "So is that why you were late this morning?"

Hmmm. This girlfriend lie was swiftly becoming a catch-all, he'd have to make sure he didn't forget anything he'd said about his fake new companion so far. "Yep, that'd be why."

"Well, good for you," Mira said.

XR watched his panel for a little while, nibbling his lower lip. The bridge suddenly seemed very quiet now. He wondered if anyone was going over what he'd said for logical inconsistencies. Oh, come on, they couldn't possibly be.

Then again, he wouldn't put it past Buzz. Better distract them. "Hey, did I ever tell you the joke about the Irken and the mermaid?"

Mira groaned in disgust, throwing up her hands. "Yes, XR. Yes, you've told us."

"You know, I've never seen one in person, but I don't think Irkens have that many hands," Buzz muttered.

Oh, come on. Like Buzz knew anything. Planet Irk was so far out from the Alliance no one had any idea what they looked like. Fun to speculate, though.

Booster blinked. "I thought they were slug aliens."

Case in point. "Nah, I think they're a race of giants," XR said. "I mean- aren't their leaders called the Tallest?"

Booster frowned. "I thought the Tallest were the soldiers."

"I guess that makes sense, yeah," XR said. He grinned mischievously and pounded his fist into his palm. "The soldiers are the biggest ones so they can just step on the enemy. Hey, wouldn't it be cool if we could just step on Zurg?"

"My father said they were furry," Mira said. She smirked, hunching her shoulders. "Wow. None of us know anything about Irkens, do we?"

XR shrugged. "I know they make good punchlines."

Buzz nodded, frowning. "Yeah, maybe we should send them an embassy before they hear all these rumors and declare war."

Everyone stared.

"Well, hey. You never know what might offend an alien race."

"I think what XR implies they do with mermaids would make anyone declare war on us," Mira said, rolling her eyes.

XR stuck his tongue out at her. Prude. At least no one was thinking about his 'girlfriend' anymore, though.

5:12 PM

The rest of the day passed without incident, and XR was in one piece when he returned to Star Command.

Always a happy occurrence.

The four rangers parted company in the launch bay. Buzz and Mira went off together to see a movie (amidst adamant claims, varying in tone from shocked to outraged, that it was NOT a date, and they were NOT dating. Yeah, suuuure they weren't). Booster was planning a superhero marathon at his apartment, he'd invited XR but said party had politely declined.

XR waved until they were out of sight, then turned and darted off. Okay, go to Tradeworld, work 'til morning. It wasn't like working in the sleazy parts of Tradeworld in the middle of the night was at all dangerous to his health, or anything. Pfft.

“XR?”

He stopped, blinking, and turned to see the janitor robot, whatserface... Dyna.

“What,” he said (no lilt at the end to turn it into a question, just flat irritation, and a rapid tapping of the foot).

“I was just wondering if I'll see you at the meet tonight?” she said, looking up at him with big, anxious screen-eyes.

Oh, golly. The stupid meet. He considered telling her he had a virus, or petrol weevils, or was going to be out on patrol, or had a sick friend, or was slowly melting, anything, for Pete's sake, but... argh, it wouldn't look good if he wasn't at the meeting.

“Yeah, yeah, I'll be there,” he grumbled, and turned away to see XL standing there with a disapproving look on his face.

"What?" XR asked.

"Nothing," XL grumbled, brushing past him, and it occurred to him that XL was never at the meets.

Huh.

Oh well, he had bigger fish to fry, and he set off for the launch bay.

5:43

He knocked on the now-familiar scummy alley door. It opened a crack, then slammed, then opened wider and a heavy package hit him in the chest. He grunted and nearly fell backwards.

Okay. He examined the package. Another address by Killerville, wonderful.

He set off at a middling pace. He was wearing the black cloak and hood he'd worn last night (which looked really debonair on him, no matter what MALIK said), to blend into the crowd a little better, only now it was blowing into his face and around his legs, making it hard not to trip or... run into a wall. It wasn't raining tonight, but it was incredibly windy.

He was crossing a street, fumbling with his clothes and trying not to drop the box at the same time when some idiot on a bike careened past, throwing his balance off. He cried out and the box slipped out of his hands and crashed into the sidewalk.

He snapped some choice words after the kid on the bike, scooping up the package. Only it was broken. Ohh, geez. The top was knocked askew.

He bit his lip, trying to resettle it. In the process he completely, totally accidentally got a look at the contents... some kind of metal parts. Robot parts, from the look of it. Um, okay. That wasn't insanely creepy or anything.

He closed it, setting back off down the sidewalk.

6:26

This house was unusual in that it was a tarnished metal dome. With no door or windows.

XR stood in the yard for a little while, holding the package and staring blankly at the dome. Well, now what.

He was still standing there dumbfounded when the ground disappeared underneath him. He screamed and came to a stop on concrete with a hard clang.

Once the tweety-birds cleared he looked up to see a tall, red-yellow-and-orange-haired (whoa, someone went a little nutty with the dye) woman in a red jumpsuit.

...Ooh. Jumpsuit.

He blinked. The woman was leveling a gun at him. Not as sexy under the circumstances.

"What are you doing here?" she said clearly.

He flailed. "I-"

Her eyes fell on the package. She gave him a warning look, then bent down and looked inside. Her face lit up and she picked it up, balancing it on one hip. She tossed the gun aside and started fishing around in her jumpsuit pockets.

"Okay, I don't wanna kill you today," she said offhandedly. XR cringed. "So here." She thrust a wad of money at him. He clasped it to his chest, staring.

"Don't tell anyone about this," she said, pressing a button, and the next minute he was sitting on the ground outside again, feeling very woozy.

He staggered to his feet and began investigating the- holy craters. She'd given him 15,000 Unibucks. His jaw dropped. Wow. Okay. Job had its perks.

He tucked the money away before it could disintegrate or something.

11:48

Well, he wasn't doing so bad so far. Earned 250 with the packages, and one guy gave him 500 to not tell anyone where his house was. Creepy hobo loony, that guy.

He shifted his grip on the box he was currently holding, grimacing. It felt like something was moving around in here.

Ugh, it was heavy. They were all getting heavy. He set it down beside him and stood on the curb for a minute, putting one hand to his helmet and listening to the too-loud, too-rough sound of his engine. XR was designed to be able to last a week without charging will no ill effects, but that was assuming he was functioning solely on a basic level without using any gadgets. Of course, he wouldn't dream of not using fifty gadgets a day, so he was already dropping.

He stared blankly across the street, dully wringing his hands. Golly, he couldn't remember a time when he'd felt more like he was... tired. Too tired to think of a clever metaphor. Dang.

After a moment an extraneous sound filtered into his consciousness, a young female voice with an odd accent, saying in a loud, melodramatic tone-

"I hung up on you cause you tahl me it on the phone because I guess you weren't man enough to tell me it in my face- I hate you and also guess what! My mother hates you too-"

He looked up, blinking, to see a small, furry green alien creature- big nose, flat beyond flat chest, no curves or hips or waist and geez Louise, was that really a girl?- standing on the curb across from him talking on the phone, chewing gum and gesturing wildly. There was a light of enthusiastic amusement in her eyes. He blinked.

"-and I ain't stupid you try to sit next to me and my lil bro who only seven years old hates you too and don't even know what you did and is always blocking your chair, ha HAA! I went out with-"

Suddenly she noticed him and lowered the phone, raising an eyebrow. "What? Problem?"

"Oh, no way," he said, holding his hands up. Stinkin' Tradeworld loonies.

"Good," she said, putting the phone back to her ear. "So anyway, where was- oh yeah. I went out with another boy after you-"

He sighed, flexed the kinks out of the cables in his arms, and picked up the box. Whatever was inside it ran around in a circle and he tightened his grip on it, wide-eyed.

Well, he'd have to have mental problems not to want to get rid of this thing as soon as possible, and he crossed the street, passing the weird chick on the phone on his way. She turned to watch him.

He was almost up to the door when she called after him "Hey. I wouldn't go in there if I were you."

He paused. "Well, you're not me," he couldn't resist saying.

"Obviously," she drawled. "Look, that guy- well, he's no prize any time of day, but..." She winced. "Look, kid, you don't want to die today, do you?"

XR was two years old as of last August. He wasn't new anymore. In fact, in laptop years he was an old geezer (not that he actually was a geezer, he wasn't a laptop, after all, he could very well live to be fifteen years old or more without crashing). So, not a kid.

He didn't bother pointing this out, though. "What are you getting at?"

"That guy. I wouldn't go in there yet," she said.

"Okay..." he mumbled, chewing this over.

The alien girl set off at a jaunty pace across the road in the direction from whence he'd came, continuing her insane monologue into the phone. A car almost hit her on the way and she scurried sideways, yelping. He shook his head pityingly and turned back to the house.

He studied it. It looked like any other crappy house he'd seen on this job.

He approached and peered cautiously through a window. Almost immediately, an explosion shook the house and he recoiled, yelping.

Well, he wasn't going in there. He set the package down in the yard and darted away, thanking his lucky stars for the tip-off. Geez Louise, these people. Who even was that guy?

He caught sight of the mailbox as he was leaving. 'Dr. Puddingspack', it said. Oh. Ouch. Well, anyone with a name like that kinda had a right to be angry.

He headed away, wiping his hands off on his cloak thing and sighing. Well, he'd head in early tonight. He was starting to have trouble focusing on the addresses. The surprise bonuses meant he didn't need nearly so much now anymore, and he had a pretty good idea where to get the rest.

He set off for headquarters and then home.

A/N: Thar. Oh, forgot to mention questions are also welcome in reviews. I may not answer if it would give something away, but go ahead and ask in case I forgot to explain something. In which case I am a bad writer. :

(Oh, and I'd prefer that no one mention upcoming plot developments in reviews because some people read the reviews first. But I won't get mad if you do. Honestly, we're not telling people they have to read the reviews first. Besides, let's face it, I'm not gonna get any reviews anyway, so it's a moot point. XD;)