Disclaimer: This applies to the entire story. I do not own The Legend of Zelda.

I am back already with a new story! This one is more of an experiment actually, since I have never written a full story with a modern setting in first-person. So, I hope you all will tell me what you like or dislike about this style. I want to be able to improve on the whole first-person thing. And a warning for this story. This is probably my most mature fanfiction, with mentions of alcohol, sex, naked people…okay, fine, naked person. So, be warned. I will keep it T-rated, though. I hope you enjoy.

Gluttony

We were Hyrule’s rich and famous. Malon Lon – daughter of the most successful businessman in the nation, Ruto Zora – heiress to the vast wealth of the Zora mines, and I, Zelda Harkinian – princess of Hyrule. Together we held more power and money than the goddesses themselves, as people liked to say.

We had it all. And we showed it off quite regularly too. But naturally, the fame and wealth came with the exhausting responsibility of keeping up with a clean, polished image for those people who adored us and looked to us to lead Hyrule. We were much too young to be burdened with such a duty, however. So, we decided somewhere along the line that if we couldn’t cut loose and have fun in our real lives, we would have to find some other way to do so.

“Will you stop that, Zelda!” Malon scolded teasingly, snapping me out of my thoughts. She sipped a drink as she sat across from me in the nightclub. “If you keep staring off into space, no guy will ask you for a dance. And besides, you haven’t finished your drink yet.” She glanced sideways at the crowded dance floor several yards away, where the mass of glittering outfits and disco lights flashed a thousand colors in the darkness.

“Malon’s right,” Ruto added. She sat to my left, her blue Zora skin contrasting sharply against the red booth seat even in the dim lighting. She and Malon stared at me, waiting for an explanation for my uncharacteristic behavior.

I had an answer, which I directed at Malon with a pointed stare. “I was not daydreaming. I was merely picking out my next victim, as you will recall that I do the asking when it comes to guys. And this is my fourth drink, and we’ve been here less than an hour. If I must get drunk, let it happen after I pick a guy or I’ll end up making out with a fat Goron.” At the last statement, I turned to look at Ruto, who swallowed too much of her Romani wine and started to cough. I stared at Malon again as she giggled and spread out her hands.

“I have to agree with that one, eh Ruto?”

“That was not funny. And my daddy was appalled.”

I raised an eyebrow and leaned back in my seat to exaggerate the stare I gave Ruto. “Appalled because you kissed a Goron? Doesn’t your father know that you’ve slept with-,”

“Shush!” Ruto hissed at me. “So what if I’ve messed around a little bit. You’ve slept with twice as many guys as I have…and you call me the whore.”

I smiled in memory, relaxing against the cushiony bench. Malon caught my dreamy expression and narrowed her eyes.

“Zelda, I don’t like that silly grin plastered on your face. You haven’t fallen for any of them, have you?”

I shook my hands anxiously in front of my face. “Of course not! You know our rules! Nothing permanent, even temporarily.” Malon seemed relieved. She returned to her drink and I tried to do the same, but suddenly Ruto bumped into me, squirming in her seat.

“Holy Nayru! Look at him!” she squealed, pointing at a Zora man leaning against the bar. He was engaged in a quiet conversation with another man next to him. I glanced at the Zora in question. He was heavily tattooed and looked quite handsome. I could understand Ruto’s eagerness.

“He seems to be worth a shot,” I said. Ruto looked at Malon. The redhead, whose hair was concealed underneath a black cap, narrowed her eyes in their direction and turned back to the table.

“Go for it,” she said. “But be careful!” Ruto cried gleefully, pushing me out of the seat in her hurry to approach the man. I laughed and sat back down, stirring my drink absently.

“In ten minutes he’ll be all over her,” I said. Malon smirked.

“I thought you were searching for your own victim,” she said. When I gaped blankly at her, she continued. “However did you miss that gorgeous hunk standing next to him?”

The term gorgeous hunk had my head turning so quickly that it hit the side of the seat. I groaned and rubbed my forehead as I glanced back for the Zora man’s companion. Unfortunately, just as I caught sight of him, he waved quietly to the Zora – who currently had an arm wrapped around Ruto’s waist – and disappeared back into the darkness. I heard Malon sigh next to me, indicating that she had been watching as well.

“Did you see his face?” she asked. I scrunched my eyes and tried to recall the little that I had seen. A blonde halo of hair and a green jacket. Not much to go by.

“Regrettably, no,” I replied. “But Ruto seems to have gotten along nicely.” Malon glanced once at our friend and scowled.

“Yeah, except that she’s breaking another one of our rules. Again.” I looked over at Ruto to see her making out with the Zora man…directly underneath the bright colored lights of the drink bar. I groaned.

“I thought we made it clear that we’re not supposed to hook up in such a bright area!” I said. “That’s why we come to such dark clubs in the first place. Look, she’s even left her hat and glasses at the table.”

“We did make it clear,” Malon said. “Ruto just doesn’t seem to care.” I ran my hand through my blonde hair with a frustrated sigh, almost knocking off my black wig.

“She’s going to be recognized! Goddesses, the man probably already knows who she is. And she complains her daddy gets upset.”

Malon turned to me and gave me a sympathetic smile. “Oh well, we’ll just have to let her go. Just make sure you don’t act even half that carelessly.”

“Trust me,” I assured her. “No guy I’ve been with knows who I am.” Malon raised an eyebrow and sipped her drink. She set it down carefully, playing with the glass between her hands before she looked up at me curiously.

“You know, I’ve always wondered that,” she said. She pushed the now empty glass away, leaning forward and resting her chin in her palm while bracing her elbow against the table surface. “How do the guys not recognize you when you’re in bed together?”

I laughed and replied, “Oh right! Forgot, Miss Virgin-Till-I’m-Married…you don’t know the tricks of the trade.”

Malon shot me a dirty look. “Hey, I’m holding out for my knight in shining armor. We promised never to discuss that.” I rolled my eyes and we both grinned. Malon might be the crazy redhead who enjoyed a drink or ten, but she was the purest out of all of us when it came to other activities.

“Well…” I continued after a sufficient pause. “You have to judge the situation carefully. Our rule is that we must not be recognized. That means the guys can’t study us too carefully, and that is easily done with a couple of Deku beers. If the men look pretty stupid, it might be safe to have them drink a couple. But you never, ever sleep with an intelligent man unless he is completely, utterly drunk. And always leave before they wake up. That saves you from prying questions.”

“Ah, I see!” Malon nodded slowly, pretending to be amazed by my advice. I smiled into my drink as I took the last sip. I sighed and stared at the empty glass in my hand. Malon eyed me expectantly.

“Another drink?” she asked, pointing to the bar. I grinned.

“Bring it!”

………

By the time I returned to the castle that night, it was well past two in the morning. My father, the king, was fast asleep in his bed. He knew nothing of my late night adventures, and I gave him little reason to suspect them. In fact, the only person who knew of my secret social life – excluding Malon and Ruto, of course – was Impa, my advisor. And though she was always helpful, she never missed any opportunity to make known to me how much she disapproved of my wild behavior.

“You’re early,” she greeted sarcastically as I climbed in through my window. I had long since mastered the art of wall climbing in miniskirts, so it did not surprise her that I had managed to get inside my room in such a short dress. She stared me down as I rose to my feet, her arms crossed sternly in front of Sheikah armor. Her clothing, a mix of grayish blue metal and tight-fitting material, made her look more like a jail warden than a royal advisor. But she liked to wear them because of tradition, something about being one of the last living Sheikah…I didn’t really remember the complete history.

“Great to see you!” I replied, my voice dripping in sarcasm as well. Impa smirked and helped me remove my wig.

“There is still nothing in the papers,” Impa told me as she usually did as I changed into a nightgown. She was putting away my disguise in a nearby drawer. “I’m surprised you do this so often and never get caught.”

“You’ll see something about Ruto tomorrow, be sure of it,” I said. My advisor clicked her tongue in disappointment.

“That girl! I will never understand her lack of restraint. Hopefully the rest of the country doesn’t know that you two are such close friends.”

I fell back on my bed with a heavy sigh. “Don’t worry. I only meet her at night. When we see each other at balls and other public events, we make sure to only nod politely and move on.” I closed my eyes as Impa murmured in half-hearted approval. I heard her shut the drawers a bit forcefully and I opened an eye.

“That reminds me,” she said, turning around and approaching the bed. “Your father asked if you would accompany him at the meeting tomorrow. He wants you to see an actual political-,”

I groaned and cut her off mid-sentence. “No way, Impa. Count me out.”

Impa did not attempt to hide her disappointment. “Zelda, don’t be ridiculous. It’s one meeting.” I sat up and rubbed my eyes. I had forgotten to take off my make-up again.

“One extremely boring, never-ending meeting with a bunch of old men who never shut up about one tiring, pointless topic.” I slid off of my comforter and headed into the bathroom. Impa was right on my heels.

“Zelda, you are twenty-one years old. Your father has said nothing about the way you dress at public events, your cold attitude towards the princes and princesses of nearby kingdoms, the way you barely greet him during the day, or even about the fact that you haven’t even decided on a possible husband. He is being far more patient than you deserve.”

I rolled my eyes accidentally as I threw water on my face to wipe off my makeup remover. Her next words were drowned out by my cry as I rubbed my eyes.

“Are you listening to me?” she asked. I blindly grabbed for a hand towel and felt her warm hand put it into my grasp. I opened my burning eyes and stared at her. She looked serious.

“Impa.” I snatched the towel away and patted my face dry. My gray-haired advisor crossed her arms again and leaned against the bathroom door. I looked at her through the mirror. “Can you ask someone to bring me some ice cream…I’m starving.”

Impa threw up her hands in defeat and retreated to my bedroom door. I followed her quietly, though my mind was now focused on getting my midnight treat rather than our previous argument. It hardly mattered anyway. My father would forget about the whole thing in a few days.

I crawled into bed as Impa came back and announced that the ice cream would arrive soon. But as I snuggled closer to the pillows, I realized that I was actually too tired to eat. Impa sighed again as I told her to cancel my request.

“You are too spoiled,” she said. “When are you ever going to grow up?”

“Can you turn the light off as you leave, Impa?” I asked, blowing off her question. When I didn’t hear a response, I sat up slightly to find Impa staring at me from the door. She looked at me for a long time. Finally, she turned away. Before leaving, she gave me another penetrating glance.

“Zelda, one of these days your life is going to stop being easy. You are supposed to be a princess, not an immature, club-hopping teenager. You cannot be both.”

The lights flipped off and I blinked automatically. “Yes you can!” I retorted into the darkness, but Impa had already left. I fell into my pillow and pulled my blanket closer to my chin.

Yes you can. As long as you don’t get caught.

Rather short, I know. This isn’t my normal, fully-planned out deal. I’m just trying out something different, with the style and Zelda’s personality and everything. And I’m going to college this year, so I have no idea what my schedule will be like, so I thought I’d stay on the safe side. Well, tell me what you think. Oh, and I’ll be going on vacation in a week, so my next update won’t come until August 1st. But check out my bio, it will have the latest update information on there!