The only one to Fear

By Tom Kristal

Standard Disclaimer: All creative rights to the characters belong to their original creator(s) and is in no way connected with Joss Whedon, Mutant Enemy Inc, Universal Pictures or 20th Century Fox. The author of the following fanfiction does not, in any way profit from the story and is written solely for entertainment purposes only. Associated names, characters, places, items, and descriptions used in the following fanfiction are the copyrights and/or trademarks of the rightful owners. Rights to characters and their settings is neither claimed nor implied.

Plot Summary: (Post Serenity). Back on Serenity, Simon & Kaylee’s new and apparently secret relationship meets an unexpected dilemma. (K/S, S/R, M/I)

Author Notes:Hello all. Welcome to Act II. Thank you to all whom reviewed my first Act. Most of my reviews were very humbling and gave me something to work harder towards. In other words... I'll try and make things better. I know I haven't got myself a beta yet, but frankly, I haven't the time at the moment. But when I do, I'll make sure the previous Act is fixed. This Act is mostly about the interaction with the rest of the crew, and how they are coping with things getting back to normal. Well as normal as you can get being on a spaceship in the vacuum of space. This act isn't as serious as the previous one either. To be fair, Simon is a pretty serious guy. Hopefully my own spin of humor will be well received.

Oh... and reviews would be nice too...

The Only One to Fear

ACT II: SCENE I

'Those idiots. How long do you suppose it'll take them to realize that everyone knows?'

'About as long as it took Mal to realize about me and Wash'.

'How long did it take Mal?' Jayne asked.

'Wash asked him to be the best man'.

Ironically despite all of Simon and Kaylee's plans to keep their little 'affair' hidden from prying eyes; the truth of the matter was however, that almost everyone knew. Kaylee was a little too cheerful, even for her. And as for Simon, there is no way in hell that that pricey-boy would ever wear a shirt undressed unless he was getting-some. And this was his third morning wearing the same damn shirt.

At the moment, the two seemed completely unaware of Zoë and Jayne starring at them from across the common room. While River sat silently eating her breakfast, the two continued to giggle incessantly from across the table.

They better not be playing footsies right about now or I’ll swear...

'This has to stop'.

'What’s wrong with you now Jayne?'

'If I wanna be hearing anyone being properly sexed, I want it being me causing all the noise.'

The main and most disturbing reason Jayne and Zoë knowing all about the pair, was because they were hearing it first-hand. For some reason, Zoë and Jayne were able to listen to everything going on in Simon's bunk through the ventilation shaft. And I mean everything. The screams, the pants, the pelvic thrusts. And to think, I once thought Reavers were scary.

And what can he do. Zoë wont let him brag that the ventilation shaft is on the fritz, so they were forced to hear 'them' scream all night. My hand is really gett'n sore.

'I give Simon this much, the boy has stamina...'

Kaylee once again suddenly began yelping at nothing at all. Looking across at Simon, he seemed to be sitting a little too low in his seat for comfort.

'That’s it. Zoë get my gun'.

'Hold it Jayne'.

'Yeah, your right. Who needs a gun'.

'No. We want to keep this quiet, remember'.

'Keep what quiet?! That girl screams louder than a gorram banshee'.

Sounding a little annoyed and frustrated herself, Zoë whispers 'Jayne, they'll hear'.

'So what. They aint exactly concerned about noise pollution'.

Me mind is made up. No way in hell that pricey rich-doctor is gonna leave this room without piss'n a little blood first. Jayne stood up to make his move, but before having a chance, Zoë grabed him by the arm and held him down.

'Let go of me, woman'.

Still holding on to his arm, 'Jayne keep your voice down. We don't want them known we know yet.'

'Why the hell not'.

'Because Mal doesn’t'.

True enough, the only one who seemed completely unaware of all this was Mal for some reason. Despite all the signs; despite all the noises; despite practically preaching to that old git that the pair were humping like crazy; for the life of me the captain was clueless.

I guess the man hears only what he wants to. And I still aint see'n Zoë’s point

'So what?’

'What do you think is going to happen when Mal finally does find out?'

Think'n a little, what would Mal do if he found out that his sweet-little mechanic was doing the dirty with...

A joyful smile broke across Jayne's face. There was no more to be said.

'Exactly'.

It normally takes allot of convincing to get Jayne into the picture, or allot of money. But this time the idea of getting even with Simon seemed too attractive an idea to miss. And besides, by letting things slide, the more fun it was for him to watch.

Zoë stood up and began to walk away. But there was still one thing on Jayne’s mind that he couldn’t figure out from all of this.

'Since when have you become so wily?'

Since Wash died, Zoë thought.

Without saying a word, Zoë left the common room, towards the cargo bay.

To be continued…