Author Note - Another chapter :) Okay, I have a quick question: what day of the week is the webcast? Because in some episodes it seems like it's on Saturday, but in others it seems like it's on Friday...I is very confuzzled...in any case, I went with the V-Day webcast in the previous chapter as being held on Saturday, in order to make this chapter and the next one or two take place on Sunday (after all..."church pants" :D).

And I just want to say thank you all for such wonderful reviews! I love reading them and hearing what you all have to say. Now on to the chapter, but first don't forget, "dot net is for losers." Maybe someone should tell the maintainers of this site...

Chapter 2

“Freddie, I love you.” The sound of Sam’s voice looped over and over again as Freddie sat in his dark room staring at his laptop.

“It’s almost like she means it,” Freddie said, more contentment in his voice than he expected would be there. “Does she mean it? Do I want her to mean it?”

He finally let it play a little further, “Kiss me, Freddie.” Freddie suddenly felt his heart do a slight jump.

“What the…?” Freddie was about to question the reason he would respond in such a way to Sam but before he could a light came on outside his room and there was a pounding on the door.

“Fredward Benson, you open this door right now!” It was Mrs. Benson. Not even the lowness of the volume on Freddie’s computer could keep her from hearing the words “Kiss me, Freddie” and send her into a frenzy similar to a mother bear’s. “You know the rules, Freddie! How could you do something like this!? Freddie, you open this door or you’ll break my heart forever,” Mrs. Benson knew how to get her son to respond and as requested the door began to open. But she didn’t wait for the whole door to open before barging in. “Where is she? Where are you trying to hide her?”

“WHAT are you talking about?” Freddie turned on his light and looked at his mom in bewilderment.

“Don’t lie to me, Fredward. I heard a girl’s voice in hear. And I even more specifically heard her say…” Before Mrs. Benson could finish, Freddie held up his laptop and played Sam saying “Kiss me, Freddie” for his mom to hear.

“I couldn’t sleep so I was just replaying the webcast,” Freddie tried to explain before his mom chose to lock him in his room, or worse some kind of bubble, for the rest of his life. “It was a Valentine’s Day special and Sam was just messing around for the audience’s enjoyment.”

“Well, certainly not my enjoyment,” Mrs. Benson said as she recomposed herself. “But if it’s just a joke, and it’s only Sam then I guess I have nothing to worry about. But you should be asleep do you hear me? Growing boys need at least 8 hours of sleep and not a minute less.”

“Mom…” Freddie groaned. He wished she still didn’t treat him like he was five.

“No sassing me, I mean it,” Mrs. Benson commanded as she turned off the light and shut the door behind her as she left.

Freddie sighed, relenting to his mom’s somewhat dictatorial ways. He put away his laptop and lay back down in his bed. Still, sleep didn’t come as easily as his mom expected it to. He stared at the ceiling, thinking about the webcast, Sam and what his mom had said. If it’s only Sam… “Is it only Sam?”

--The Next Morning--

“Morning sunshine!” Sam let herself into the Shay apartment using the key she had copied from Carly’s.

“AHHH!” Spencer hit his head inside of the refrigerator. He closed it and slowly turned around as he rubbed the back of his head. “Ouch, I…Sam?” He looked down and realized he was still in just a t-shirt and boxers. “Uh, you’re here a little early aren’t you?” he asked nervously, trying to remain behind the island where she wouldn’t see him.

“Aww, it’s never too early to say good morning to you, Spencer,” a huge smile crossed Sam’s face that seemed genuine enough.

“Wow, since when did you become a morning person?” Spencer became distracted by the change in Sam’s demeanor to the point that he forgot about his boxer dilemma and walked out into the open. Of course the new smirk on Sam’s face brought Spencer back to the moment. “Aww, man! Don’t look. Hurry upstairs or something.”

“Relax, Spencer,” Sam laughed as she talked. “I’ve seen you in your boxers before. Of course, these are much better. I didn’t know you liked The Littlest Unicorn,” Sam moved closer, but Spencer instantly retreated back behind the island, attempting to get away to his room.

“Uh, no, I don’t, I just…they were a gift from a girlfriend in college. Kind of a gag gift of sorts and I, uh…” Spencer slowly moved around the island as he spoke.

“A what?” The smile disappeared from Sam’s face and her eyebrows furrowed. “What kind of stupid girlfriend gets her boyfriend a pair of girly boxers? Someone should find that chick and teach her a lesson.”

“Ooookay…yeah, well, that’s not really necessary, Sam, but thanks, I guess,” Spencer looked at her, partially intimidated by her sudden temper change and partially baffled by her reaction. Before anything else could be said, Freddie came rushing into the apartment. “Oh look, Freddie’s here!” Spencer pointed and as Sam turned her head to look, he made a dash for his room.

“Spencer?” Sam looked like she was disappointed that Spencer was gone. “See what you did?” she turned her wrath towards Freddie now.

“I’m sorry. I just heard your voice from across the hall and decided to, you know, come over,” Freddie said a little shyly.

“Wow, desperate to get away from mommy already?” Sam rolled her eyes and plopped down on the couch.

“You’re one to talk,” Freddie spat back but to Sam’s surprise he covered his mouth in regret. “No, Sam, I’m sorry. I really didn’t mean that.”

“Sure you did,” Sam eyed him weirdly. “You and I go back and forth all the time.”

“I know, but I was thinking,” Freddie fumbled for words. “And maybe we shouldn’t fight so much. I really don’t mind being around you,” Freddie sat down on the couch next to Sam and casually snaked his arm around her shoulders. “In fact, I think I might actually enjoy being around you.”

“Whoa now? What’s going on here?” Spencer re-entered the room, now more decently clothed.

“It’s not what you think!” Sam threw Freddie’s arm off of her and stood to her feet quickly. “He started it!”

“So then Freddie has finally gotten over his mildly disturbing, impossible crush on my baby sister?” Spencer looked at Freddie who sat on the couch with a deterred look on his face. “Good for you, Fredd-o. Well, don’t let me stop you. Well, actually, yeah, I probably should stop you.”

“Why!?” Freddie asked frantically.

“Because maybe he’s jealous,” Sam taunted Freddie, while it seemed she was hoping it was true, which made Freddie look at Spencer with wide eyes.

“No, because it’s called adult supervision. Just doing my job,” Spencer answered as he started to pull out the ingredients he needed to make some breakfast.

“Wow, that is very mature,” Sam complimented. “It’s so hard to find guys who take their responsibilities so seriously.”

“I do!” Freddie protested from where he still sat.

Sam ignored him. “So, Spencer, in four years I’ll be 18.”

“Right…” an odd expression crossed Spencer’s face as he pulled out some eggs and laid them in a big bowl.

“So how old will you be?” Sam already knew but wanted to hear it from him.

“Uh, 30 and I’m not so sure I’m comfortable with this conversation.”

“Wow, so you’ll still be really young,” Sam smiled enthusiastically.

“Um, yeah, I guess 30 isn’t what people call old, but, I don’t know why you’re asking and…uh…CARLY! Sam and Freddie are here!” Spencer yelled in panic as he began cracking the eggs furiously.

“Here let me help you!” Sam pushed her way between Spencer and the island and began cracking eggs too as Freddie crossed his arms and glared at the two from the couch.

Meanwhile, Carly quickly made her way down the stairs but stopped at the landing and stared at the back of Freddie’s head. She pulled some lip gloss out of her pocket and touched up her lips, which were clearly still freshly glossed. She then fluffed her hair with her hands. “Hi, Freddie!” she waved at him as he turned and looked at her.

“Oh, hey, Carly,” Freddie seemed highly uninterested.

Carly gave a hurt pout as she came down the rest of the stairs. She followed Freddie’s glare and saw her brother and Sam, still very close, in the kitchen. “What’s going on here!?” For a moment it seemed like Carly was back to her normal self.

“Oh hey, Carly,” Sam said nonchalantly.

Spencer on the other hand moved as far away from his little sister’s best friend as he could, glad for Carly’s help. “She insisted on helping me make breakfast,” he said as he walked over to Carly and mouthed, “please make her stop!”

Freddie read Spencer’s lips and suddenly became hopeful. “Yeah, Carly, make her stop. She should be over here relaxing, not in there slaving over a meal.”

“Oh really?” Carly turned in an unusual jealous manner. “And do you expect me to slave over the meal instead?”

“I didn’t say that! I only meant that poor Sam…” Freddie started but Carly and Sam both cut him off.

“Poor Sam!?” the girls shouted simultaneously, both for different reasons.

“The only thing poor about Sam is her behavior,” Carly tried reasoning with Freddie.

“Don’t listen to either of them, Spencer,” Sam defended herself. “Not only am I getting better with my emotional constipation, but I really don’t mind slaving over a meal. I like to cook as much as you do.”

“Since when?” Freddie asked in disbelief. “Cooking involves work, and you hate work.”

“Exactly,” Carly chimed in on Freddie’s side. “She hates work. What a lazy…”

“Hey now,” Freddie backed up and pointed his finger at Carly. “I wasn’t implying she’s a lazy anything. She’s good at whatever she does.”

“Oh, please,” Carly snapped her head backwards flippantly and rolled her eyes. “She’s not even the real star of iCarly. She could leave the show for good and no one would even care.”

“Spencer would care! Wouldn’t you Spence?” Sam looked at Carly’s older brother for reassurance.

“Yeah, of course, but I…” Spencer started to say but didn’t finish.

“I would care too!” Freddie shouted.

“Okay, something is very wrong here,” Spencer carefully backed away from the bickering teens. “Carly likes Freddie, Freddie likes Sam, Sam likes…well, I don’t really get who Sam likes and now they’re all fighting over…”

“Freddie Benson, why are you not ready yet?” Mrs. Benson let herself in, all dressed up for church.

“…Mrs. Bens-s-s-s-s…”

“Hello, Spencer,” she acknowledged Spencer’s awkward stuttering and then turned her attention back to dragging her son away from the Shay apartment. “You know the rules. No seeing your friends before church unless they’re coming too.”

“I want to go to church, Mrs. Benson!” Carly spoke up excitedly.

“Who wants to go to ch…” Sam started.

“Me too!” Spencer raised his hand.

“Count me in!” Sam changed her mind immediately.

“All of you want to go to church?” Mrs. Benson looked a little hesitant. “You too, Sam?”

“Mom!” Freddie’s mouth fell open. “You can’t treat Sam like that. God loves Samantha Puckett and so should we,” Freddie gave an infatuated glance towards Sam as he said it.

“Okay, well, if you can all be ready within the next twenty minutes or so, I suppose…”

“YAY!” Spencer jumped up and down, and Mrs. Benson just looked at him in disbelief before grabbing Freddie’s arm and dragging him back to their apartment.

“Aww, I just realized I don’t have anything to wear,” Sam looked sadly at Spencer.

“I’m sure Carly has something you can borrow,” Spencer suggested and looked at his sister.

“Oh yes,” Carly forced a smile. “I have just the thing.”