I was thinking about the materialistic Susan in the last book and it really upset me so I decided to research it a bit and fou

I was thinking about the materialistic Susan in the last book and it really upset me so I decided to research it a bit and found a quote from Lewis’ Letters to Children: ‘The books don't tell us what happened to Susan. She is left alive in this world at the end, having by then turned into a rather silly, conceited young woman. But there's plenty of time for her to mend and perhaps she will get to Aslan's country in the end... in her own way.’ This gave me a bit of hope and so this popped into my head. It’s my first attempt at Narnia fanfiction so I hope you’ll like it.

Susan Pevensie smiled as she smoothed out the silk of her new dress and gave herself a twirl in the mirror. Her grin grew wider as she admired the way it fit her. She added a pair of heels, twisted her hair up into a bun and studied herself. One thing was missing.

She pulled her drawers open and rooted through them in search of the silver chain she knew would match perfectly. She had not worn it for a long time and she was finding all sorts of things in the bottom of these drawers. Her first love letter, a card from her twenty first birthday and then finally the necklace. She pulled it out and held it up to the light triumphantly then clasped it around her slender neck. She was about to walk back to the mirror but something else in the drawer caught her eye. A photo frame.

She walked slowly back to the chest of drawers and sat down on the bed beside it. She reached into the open drawer and took the photo out, blowing the thick dust from the glass. Her eyes widened as she saw her family’s faces peering up at her. It was her family portrait from so many years before. She smiled at her sixteen year old self then her gaze flickered to her older brother Peter, then to Edmund and Lucy. Finally she looked at her parents caring faces and couldn’t contain herself any longer. A tear dropped onto the glass and slid down onto her dress.

Susan threw the picture back inside the drawer and pushed it shut with a resounding thud. She collapsed onto the bed, tears running all over her face. Her mascara was leaving black marks all over the bedding but she didn’t care. It had been a year since the train accident and she thought she had already done her mourning but she had been so wrong. She had buried her feelings deep down inside her for a long time and now they were finally breaking out from their confinement. She couldn’t let that happen. She had reputation to keep and that certainly wouldn’t be happening if she was crying all over the place. She would allow herself one night but then that was it. The mask would go straight back on.

Sure enough, Susan cried herself to sleep. She didn’t care that her dress was creasing nor that her makeup was completely ruined. However, her dreams weren’t that much more comforting. This was her night to remember.

She felt the cold of the glistening white snow as she tumbled out of the wardrobe into Narnia for the first time. She experienced utter despair as she realised her younger brother was gone. She saw Father Christmas handing her a large bow and a magnificent horn. She wept for Aslan on the Stone Table, being mercilessly slaughtered. She watched the White Witches army surging towards them and raised her bow, shooting an arrow high into the air. She saw the huge crowd, gathered in the beautiful building that was Cair Paravel, beaming up at their rulers and saviours. She witnessed Prince Caspian and Peter fighting in the forest, both with wild eyes filled with fire. She heard the anguished screams as they fought a losing battle in the Telmarine Castle. She felt her cheeks burn as Caspian rescued her from the Telmarines who were about to kill her. She fought back tears as she saw her older brother duelling to the death. She felt a rush of hope as she saw Lucy and Aslan appear on the other side of the bridge, bringing peace to all. Then she felt her heart break as she felt Prince Caspian’s lips on hers, knowing this would be the first and last time.

Susan’s eyes snapped open and she gripped the sheets with anger.

“I believe,” she whispered and sat up.

Her eyes were filled with a fire that had been missing for years. She looked down at the dress she was wearing with pure hatred. She had become consumed by makeup and clothes, blocking out her past in Narnia for selfish reasons. She was so desperate to become the adult that she once was that she forgot the only thing that could really make her happy. She blocked out that which she loved most.

In a rage, she marched over to her wardrobe and pulled all the clothes out, throwing them across the room in disgust. She screamed and swiped wildly at her dressing table, knocking pots of powder and perfume to the floor with a smash but she didn’t care. She had squandered her life away on these pointless bits of ‘luxury’ but now she wanted to be Susan the Gentle once more.

She threw her front door open and ran barefoot into the damp garden. She looked up at the clear night sky and threw her hands up.

“I’m sorry!” she screamed. The neighbours were staring through their lace curtains but Susan ignored them. “I’m sorry! I believe! Take me back! Please!”

She crumpled into a heap on the grass and sobbed, ripping clumps of grass up and hugging herself.

“Please,” she whispered with one last spurt of hope. “Please take me back…Aslan.”

She closed her eyes and let out one last breath. Susan Pevensie had left England forever.

Feeling the warm sunlight on her exhausted body, Susan’s eyes slowly opened and she saw tall trees and smelt fragrant flowers. She sighed happily and closed her eyes again. She was home.

“Susan!” came Lucy’s joyous cry and Susan felt a pair of small arms wrap themselves around her. “I knew you’d find yourself in the end.”

Susan smiled and sat up, hugging her sister fiercely. Soon her brothers ran up and embraced her happily too. She couldn’t stop the tears of joy that escaped her eyes as she saw her family once again. Then she saw him.

The Lion walked up to the four Pevensies smiling proudly down at them. Susan stood up, brushed herself down and curtsied to the large creature.

“Please forgive me Aslan,” she begged. “I allowed myself to be taken in by materialism and pettiness, forgetting all I was ever taught. I don’t deserve to be back here. Thank you.”

The words didn’t sum up the gratitude Susan felt towards the old Lion and he could tell. He smiled forgivingly down at the young girl.

“Stand up Queen Susan the Gentle,” he ordered gently.

“I do not deserve that title anymore Aslan. I abused it.”

“Do you not remember what I told you all that time ago? Once a King or Queen of Narnia, always a King or Queen,” smiled the dear old creature. “I am not one to go back on my word.”

When Susan stared up into those loving golden eyes, she couldn’t help it. She threw her arms around his neck and buried her face in his thick mane.

“I’m back,” she whispered.

“My dear child, you were never gone,” grinned Aslan knowingly. “You were only hidden.