Dear Voldy,

Let's discuss our feelings, shall we? Let's see. I feel angry because you killed my parents, lonely because you killed my parents, and sad because you killed my parents. Seems to be a pattern here, now doesn't it?

Harry Potter

Dear Potter,

Oh, yes. Sorry about that. I was feeling particularly angsty that night. I don't know why. But please, it would really make everyone's life a lot easier if you just let me kill you?

Lord Voldemort

Dear Voldy,

No, thanks. I don't really feel like dying today. It's a sunny day, and I want to play in the pool. But anyways, back to feelings. I really think you have problems. Really. Like that whole Death Eater/ Dark Mark thing? A little freaky. And a little scary. Are you afraid of the dark?

Harry Potter

Dear Potter,

Fine. How about tomorrow?

Lord Voldemort

P.S. No, of course I am not afraid of the dark! … Are you?

Dear Voldy,

A bit, just maybe. And tomorrow's not looking good, or the day after, or the day after. I can arrange a day next month. Although, you have to admit, if we plan the day for me to die, that would probably be stupid for you. I'll just trick you and then I won't die.

Harry Potter

Dear Potter,

Well, that would be just mean. Look, what if I give you candy first?

Lord Voldemort

Dear Voldy,

CANDY CANDY CANDY ME WANT CANDY!

Harry Potter

Dear Potter,

Yes. I realize you want candy. And I have candy, rooms and rooms full of it. But remember the deal?

Lord Voldemort

Dear Voldy,

The deal… oh, yes. The deal. No thanks, then. I'm rich. I'll buy my own candy.

Harry Potter

Dear Potter,

Blast it. I'll convince you tomorrow.

Lord Voldemort

A/N: So what is it? Random? Funny? Crazy? I don't know. Review please! It is random and crazy and hopefully somewhat funny. Revieeewww!