|The Lamborghini Triplets
Author: outerelf PM
To be Red Alert is like to be a 'perfect day'. Disaster strikes hard and fast, at the worst possible moment, and with the names Sideswipe and Sunstreaker. Of course, it doesn't help when if you're all triplets... T to give me plenty of wiggle roomRated: Fiction T - English - Family - Chapters: 11 - Words: 22,573 - Reviews: 91 - Favs: 71 - Follows: 84 - Updated: 02-03-09 - Published: 07-29-08 - id: 4431920
|A+ A- Full 3/4 1/2 Expand Tighten|
Red Alert rolled over on the bunk, curling into a tiny ball. .:Red Alert, Red Alert!:.
.:It SNOWED! It's all white and clean and pristine-:. Sideswipe gibbered, his excitement clear and loud over the bond. Red Alert considered burying himself into the bunk and falling back asleep.
.:What about it? It was snowing earlier. The humans went wild.:. Red Alert pointed out tiredly.
.:But it's brand new!:. Sideswipe insisted. .:Come on out with me and Sunny!:.
.:Aww, c'mon Red! You need to relax. And we can feel your tension all the way over here. You've been overworked. Time to come out and have fun!:.
Red Alert knew he was going to find himself outside the moment he realized he was seriously considering going out. .:No one will ever know. Everyone is asleep for the night, and Bluestreak has monitor duty and Bumblebee was looking around for a few of the high-grade cubes he had stashed away-:.
For a moment the overwhelming demand came to go up to the control room and take over rose up in his CPU, before Sideswipe said sharply, .:No, you aren't. You're coming outside and you're coming out to play with us.:.
There was a short pause as Sideswipe admitted, .:We haven't had time to talk together other then in the hallways. And since nobody knows-:.
Red Alert sighed and rolled out of the berth. He checked his inside chronometer before walking outside of the door, timing his movements exactly to the pattern. To most mechs it was completely random. To more perceptive mechs it had a slight pattern to it. Only to Red Alert did the entire pattern reveal itself.
Through the empty, dark hallways, and out into the outside. He could see a slight flash of yellow and red ahead. He transformed, mentally cursing the fact that he hadn't bothered getting snow tires before leaving.
A snowball big enough to engulf a human whizzed through the air at him. He swerved sharply, and transformed, his gun in his hand. .:Come and try to catch us.:.
A half smile played across Red Alerts face as he bent. The snow, still churned up from earlier, was quickly packed into a giant snowball. For a good measure he packed another one and went hunting.
A flash of yellow ahead of him, and a flash of red off to his right. Red Alert smirked as the rattle of hydraulics caught his auditory receptors, and he threw. The yelp ahead of him assured him that he had hit. He turned, his optics searching for the red flash. "Red, you have to turn off your extra upgrade sensors!" Sunstreaker snarled. "It's no fair otherwise!"
"You're both trying to sneak up on me!" Red Alert protested. There was a moment of silence.
"Alright, Alright. Free for all!"
Sideswipe launched a snowball at Sunstreaker, who scurried to dodge the flying white missile. Red Alert dimmed his external sensors, before bending to pack the snow into balls. He then rushed into the fray. Sideswipe laughed as he threw a snowball. Red Alert ducked, before expertly tossing his ball at the flash of red.
Sunstreaker appeared out of the corner of his optics, and lobbied the snowball at him. It shattered against his chassis, and he scooped to pack up a snowball. Sideswipe called, "Further up in the mountains! No one will see our tracks there!"
The three called a temporary truce as they hiked up into the mountains. At last Red Alert stopped, leaning against a snow covered rock. The snowfall had to be record deep. Even for the giant robots it was becoming rather thick. And here in the mountains where the snow hadn't even been touched-
"Didn't the humans make snow men earlier?" Sideswipe suggested, glancing around at the untouched snow.
Red Alert checked his internal chronometer. It was nearing midnight. He glanced up at the storm, flicking on all his sensors and concentrating on it. The snow had not yet even begun to fall. A fierce blizzard was approaching fast. "Sideswipe, Sunstreaker, a blizzard is approaching."
"Then keep a sensor on it and tell us in time to get back to the Ark." Sideswipe said carelessly. "I wanna try out making a snowman and an igloo. An igloo sounded interesting."
"What is it?"
"It's a structure made completely out of snow. C'mon Sunny, lets make one."
Red Alert found himself side by side with Sideswipe and Sunstreaker rolling the snow into huge balls, before he demanded, "How big is this supposed to be?"
"Big enough to fit the three of us I suppose." Sideswipe said, looking around at the three.
Sunstreaker scowled, looking around the flat area. Snow fell heavily, as if trying to drown them in the quiet, white silence. Red Alerts head fell backwards as he stared up at the eternally falling flakes, not twitching as they fell onto his unshuttering optics.
He abruptly found himself being pulled down into a sitting position. Automatically he lashed out. Sunstreaker snarled, "Sit already!"
Red Alert stilled as he meekly allowed himself to be pulled down into the snow. Sunstreaker sat for a moment, before immediately jumping back up into a standing position. The stone that he had wrenched out of the ground wasn't the best tool, but he soon had a crude circle drawn around the three imprints. Sideswipe immediately bounced to his feet, rolling the large balls of snow already made onto the line. Red Alert pointed out, "We'll need an entrance."
Sunstreaker stamped down a portion of the circle. "There you go. Now come on!"
Red Alert smiled slightly as he found himself once again rolling snow. It wasn't the easiest job, but it was one that he found bearable as he listened to Sideswipe and Sunstreaker banter about times before the war, and even during the war. As they laughed at the small things, Red Alert said aloud, "You remind me of the time when I sang in front of everyone. I was so certain that I was horrible."
"No, you actually sang better then most mechs." Sunstreaker admitted, lifting his ball into place. Red Alert packed snow into the cracks, as Sideswipe went further up the mountain to find more snow.
"True, but it really depressed me. I remember feeling so happy when I was singing-"
"Have you ever sang since then?" Sideswipe asked from above, and then cursed as he shouted, "Look out!"
Both looked up as the giant snowball came careening down the hill. Red Alert found all of his systems locked into a standstill as the ball came closer and closer-
Sunstreaker yanked him out of the way. "Really Red, whatever would you do if we weren't here?" He inquired dryly as the ball exploded against an outcropping of rock.
Red Alert shrugged. "Probably be dead by now."
The quiet seriousness of his tone brought both down into a level of reality. Then, Sideswipe shook himself. "Listen up Red Alert, we are not here to be in reality. We are here to have fun, catch up on each other, and relax. C'mon triplet of mine; lets finish this igloo."
Red Alert pulled himself away from Sunstreaker, his optics still slowly sinking back to reality. Sideswipe noticed, and tutted. "For every moment you spend in reality you have to sing that many songs for us."
'Deer caught in headlights' was the very definition of Red Alert as his CPU was jerked away from worry and responsibility. "What?"
"You have to sing for us. Starting with Hamster Dance. Then we'll move on to Waka Laka." Sideswipe stated calmly. "If you still refuse to cheer up, Numa Numa will be the ultimate song."
"Numa Numa hmm?" Red Alert murmured, looking up the lyrics and the song. When he saw it, he nearly laughed. "That's easy enough."
"Good, then sing." Sideswipe grinned.
Sunstreaker tapped Red Alerts shoulder. "You were in reality for three clicks- that means three songs."
"I haven't sung in a really long time."
"Doesn't matter. You're the only one who can carry a tune."
Red Alert scowled in mock frustration, before giving up. The two would simply hound him into it anyways.
The two joined in tunelessly as the music spiraled up into the air. The igloo slowly took shape as they worked, and the blizzard came ever closer. It wasn't until they could barely see each other did they realize the blizzard had come. "Sideswipe, Sunstreaker, come on!" Red Alert called. Confusion flew across the bond to him.
Their sensors were overloaded by the white grayness. Red Alert darted forward and caught a hand. His scanners quickly located the other, and he caught that hand as well. "Follow me."
.:Do you know where you're going?:. Sunstreaker demanded, even as he allowed himself to be tugged forward.
.:Yes and no. I know where the Ark is, I'm not sure how we're going to get to it however. Come one, we need to keep on moving.:.
.:At least we don't have to worry about freezing to death. Humans by now would be frozen stiff.:. Sideswipe pointed out. Red Alert charitably refrained from pointing out that the energon inside of their tubes could freeze up.
There was a moment of nasty surprise as Red Alert stepped out onto thin air before the twins hauled him back up onto the solid ground. For a moment all three stood there, and Red Alert admitted quietly, .: I think I'll just concentrate on walking.:.
Hound settled back beside the door to the Arks entrance watching the snow swirl and fall outside. While watching a blizzard might be fun, he doubted very much he'd like to be out in it-
Optimus Prime glanced out the doors, and smiled slightly. "I don't believe we'll be getting any visitor…"
A gray shape began to emerge from the swirling snow. Both froze, staring at the shape as two more slowly appeared, flanking it. "Who-"
Al three shapes swept in, snow completely covering them from head to toe. Optimus Prime considered for a moment summoning Red Alert and Prowl before he demanded, "Who are you?"
"Red Alert reporting for duty sir!" Red Alert snapped, one hand flying up for a salute. The effect was that of a bizarre walking snow pile saluting.
Prime stared at the walking snow pile. He could see no defining features as to what might constitute it as Red Alert, other then it was about the right height. The two snow piles behind him also saluted, but much more casually. "Sideswipe and Sunstreaker here." Sideswipe said cheerfully. "Hey, Sunny, is your paint waterproof?"
The innocent question set off other pile of snow. "Oh slagit! I gotta go check-"
A trail of slowly melting snow marked the pathway of one mech as the other two watched him go. Then the smallest snow pile shook himself, shedding a large amount of snow. Soon, only a thin layer of snow that had frozen to his metal skin was left. Prime could now pick out defining features. "Red Alert, might I ask what's going on?"
"A camera up in the mountains was destroyed and I went to go fix it sir." Red Alert lied with a straight face. 'I went out to go play in the snow like a CPU-dead sparkling' would not go over well for his general image.
"A camera up in the mountains." Prime repeated, staring askance at Red Alert. "Why didn't you sign out? We thought that everyone was on base."
"I thought I did. I'm sure I did. And I didn't mean to be out so late."
"I see." Prime murmured, dropping that line of questioning. "And the blizzard crept up you unaware?"
Red Alert nodded, his face straight. Prime hesitated for a long moment, before waving the smaller mech on. "Go get yourself warmed up Red Alert."
As Red Alert left, he breathed a small sigh of relief. Second hardest mech down. Now, if he could just avoid Inferno until after he got through the wash rack- No such luck. Infernos happy humming drifted down the hallway, headed straight for Red Alert. Desperate he looked around. Only storage rooms were down this hallway, and with a mental groan he darted into one. He waited, tense and wary for Inferno to pass.
Inferno stopped right in front of the door. NOOOOO! His CPU wailed. Sideswipe caught his panic, and snapped, .:Calm down Red! I'll get him off of you.:.
The question came too late as a fire alarm went off. Red Alert considered face palming, but didn't as Infernos footsteps padded away quickly, the mech himself cackling like mad over the fire.
.: Thank you Sideswipe.:.
.: Any time. Any time. You did have a good time outside, right?:.
.: Yes, I did. Thank you again.:.
.: I thought you'd like it.:. Sideswipe sounded as smug as if he had invented snow himself. Red Alert didn't bother correcting the smugness. For now he needed to get himself cleaned up. Maybe after the snowstorm he could go back to the igloo they had made to see if it was still standing.
If it was… well, no one would notice if he disappeared for a few orns, now would they?
Red Alert stepped into the washroom, quietly adjusting the water so that his armor didn't crack or steam too badly when the water hit the snow, boosting his internal heat.
Then with a slightly happy sigh he stood under the pounding water, letting the snow slowly melt off of him- "Hey Red!"
Red Alert nearly screeched from surprise as Inferno spoke right behind him. He hadn't heard anyone enter over the rush of water. He turned, optics falling onto the larger truck, who held out a bar of soap. "I suppose this would be the wrong time to ask if you'd be willing to go out in the snow?" Inferno enquired dryly, though his optics clearly stated his disappointment.
"No, just let me dry off properly and I should then be able to enter into the snow." He hesitated, before asking, "Why?"
"The blizzard outside is falling off and Jazz is dividing the Ark into two teams to have a snowball fight. Just hoping you'd be willing to come out with us."
It translated somewhat to, 'I'm going to drag you out there whether you like it or not.'
Red Alert sighed, and asked, "Is Prime in?"
"Prime and Prowl."
"Then I don't have a chance, do I?"
"Nope." Inferno said cheerfully, dragging Red Alert from out of the spray. "Let's get you all dried up and out into the snow."
As Red Alert found himself being dragged out of the wash racks, he could hear Perceptors voice drifting down the hallway. "Did you know that water goes in a continuous cycle? So that way the very snow that is falling might have once fallen onto the snout of a dinosaur millions of years ago? It's a never ending cycle-"
Red Alert smirked slightly, before allowing himself to be pulled out into the snow.