|Worlds Greatest Dad
Author: Sunny's Priceless Dream PM
Despite what his wife thinks, Chris can handle getting his kids ready for their first day of school. He never promised everything would go smoothly though. Appearance by Cody. One shot for now.Rated: Fiction K+ - English - Humor - Words: 1,184 - Reviews: 9 - Favs: 6 - Follows: 1 - Published: 08-04-08 - Status: Complete - id: 4448855
|A+ A- Full 3/4 1/2 Expand Tighten|
A/N- This would have been up sooner, but Becky sent me a link to the Kennedy game, and I spent forever on it.
I originally intended for Cody to have a bigger role in this, but it didn't turn out that way. Maybe I'll add a second chapter. You guys let me know.
"Chris, are you sure? I can get my hours at worked changed." Jess tells him, slightly worried about the following day.
"Babe, no need to worry. I can handle it." Chris promises.
"It's Sierra and Cheyenne's first day of school, and Ash's first day of third grade." Jess explains.
"Hun, no worry, I got it covered." Chris assures her. He had a rare three days in a row off from wrestling, and his kids were starting school. Jess had to work tomorrow, letting Chris in charge. That has never happened before.
"I just think I should be there for their first day of school, especially the girls." Jess says, slipping into bed.
"Wake them up, feed them breakfast, make sure they catch the bus. I can handle it." Chris tells her again. Really, what was the big deal? He can take care of his own kids.
"No calling them names." Jess tells him. Chris doesn't insult his kids by any means, but he uses words that shouldn't be used around children.
"No worries, no swearing."
"Alright. Turn out the light."
"Wait until I finish this chapter. The suspense is killing me."
"Chris, you know what's going to happen. You wrote the book. Which is about you." Jess says, rolling onto her side, while rolling her eyes.
"As a best selling author, I recommend this book to anyone." Chris says, completely ignoring what Jess said.
"Whatever Chris. Make sure you're up by six thirty. So don't stay up much longer." Jess orders.
"Once I find out what happened when I went to WCW, I'm going to bed."
"Wake up assclowns, time for some Edge-U-Cation." Chris hollers. He already had his three cups of coffee, and he was ready to go. Jess left at five, and he was up shortly after that.
"I'm up dad. The other two jackasses aren't." Ash informs his father. Chris winces at the word jackass. Jess would kill him if she heard that.
"Don't say jackass. Say monkey." Chris instructs his son, standing in the doorway of his room.
"But you say it."
"I'm allowed. I am Y2J, what else am I Ash?"
"First ever Undisputed Champion and King of the World." Ash tells him.
"Good boy. Go brush your teeth." Chris smiles at his son, watching him run into the bathroom. After hearing the sink start in the bathroom, he walked to the twins room.
"I don't want to go."
"Mommy says we have too." Chris heard his two girls talking to each other.
"Ash went before, and he liked it."
"Ash is a jerkoff." Chris hear Sierra say. Once again, he winced at the work jerk off. Jess was going to kill him one of these days. Deciding now was a good time to interrupt and set them straight on the word, he pushed the door open.
"Jerk off isn't a nice word girls. Say idiot or something nicer like that." Chris tells them, sitting down on one of the beds.
"You say that word all the time dad." Cheyenne reminds him.
"But who am I?"
"Chris Jericho, King of the World." Sierra answers.
"And..." Chris edges, feeding his own ego.
"Uh...first ever Undisputed Champion." Sierra adds, unsure of the answer.
"Correct, but I want a faster response next time."
"Finish getting ready, you only got an hour." Chris tells them.
"What if all the other kids can read? We can't read that well." Cheyenne says, obviously worrying about it.
"Well, no other six year old can read A Lions Tale. So just take a copy from the den, and read it outloud to impress people."
"Yeah, you're right. Thanks dad." Sierra says, pushing her dad out of the room, just as his cell phone started ringing.
"Easy girl. I'm going, I got to take your mothers call."
"Y2J speaking." Chris says, answering his cell.
"YOU ENROLLED OUR GIRLS UNDER JERICHO. NOT IRVINE." Jess's fuming voice sounded through the phone.
"Jess, wait, I can..."
"You did the same thing with Ash two years ago. I told you about it then. Chris, their last name, as well as yours, IS IRVINE." Jess reminds him.
"Sure babe, I got to go cook breakfast. Bye."
"You don't know how to..." Jess begins, but was cut off by the dial tone. She knew she should have stayed home today.
Chris ventured into the kitchen in search of something too make his kids to eat. Cereal was out of the question. His kids were going to school with full stomachs. Cereal didn't fill anybody up. He could always make them pancakes, but he was fairly sure Cheyenne didn't like them. Sierra hated eggs, and Ash would eat anything. It wasn't long before the kids made their way into the kitchen. Chris decided to just ask them.
"What do you want for breakfast?"
"Waffles." Were the three answers he got, from three different kids.
"What the hell are scones?" Chris asks.
"Forget it. How about pizza?" Chris suggests.
"We don't have any dad." Ash says, sitting down at the table.
"Which is what delivery is for."
"Mom won't like this."
"What your mother doesn't know, won't hurt her." Chris tells them.
"I want pepperoni."
"I want sausage."
"I was ham."
"Wait, guys. Lets get bacon on it, that's a breakfast food." Chris says thoughtfully.
"Your so smart daddy." Sierra comments. Chris gives her a thumbs up, then makes a call to the local pizza shop. He wasn't happy when he hung up the phone.
"Dammit. They aren't open for another two hours. Well, lets just go into the room and watch some of my matches, we'll order later."
"But dad, we have too go to school." Ash reminds him.
"Well your going to have to go in late. Now let's go, into the living room. Chey, you pick which match to watch." Chris says, walking out of the kitchen.
"Call Cody and invite him over." Chris yells from another room. Ash immediately grabbed the phone, anxious to call his uncle Cody.
"Mommy is going to be so mad at dad." Sierra whispers, walking out of the kitchen with Cheyenne.
"I know. Maybe we should just go outside and wait for the bus." Cheyenne suggests. Even at six, they knew they had to go to school.
"Chris, your kids have to go to school. Jess is going to flip." Cody said, he didn't even have the front door closed yet.
"Don't worry, they are. Just a few hours late."
"I'm leaving before Jess gets home."