|Jasper? I'm Scared
Author: Ein Kampf kann eine Lebenszeit PM
Alice meets Jasper in the diner, and she receives her visions of The Cullen's, only they frighten her instead of intrigue her. They agree to avoid The Cullen's, but what happens when they accidentally run into them in Forks? AU, please read and review.Rated: Fiction T - English - Romance/Drama - Alice & Jasper - Chapters: 7 - Words: 11,864 - Reviews: 14 - Favs: 11 - Follows: 19 - Updated: 12-22-08 - Published: 08-15-08 - Status: Complete - id: 4476224
|A+ A- Full 3/4 1/2 Expand Tighten|
One thousand, two hundred seventy seven and a half days. That's how long we had been here with these Cullen's. We had, of course, adapted their way of life, or at least, I had tried to. I wasn't trying very hard, convinced that Jasper and I would be leaving soon. On day one hundred I expected us to go our own way again, but we hadn't. We came to have our own room, and our own bathroom. The Cullen's, as I remembered from one of my first visions of them, went to school. Carlisle, the one who made each one of them, worked at the hospital. He had never tasted human blood. I like him the least.
Esme, the mother like member of the family, yet she was younger than both Edward and myself, did reconstruction on buildings that were falling down with a team of men and women. She had only tasted the blood of a couple of humans. She was extraordinarily nice to me and Jasper and I couldn't help but like her. She was my favorite.
Rosalie attended high school along with Edward and Emmett, and now myself and Jasper, and she had also never tasted human blood. Though she had killed seven humans when she was first turned. She was self obsessed, and at times, bitchy. She only ever cared about herself and Emmett. Occasionally she would show some sort of emotion towards Esme and Carlisle, and that was usually anger. She usually ignored Edward. I hated her.
Emmett, the large intimidating one, had tasted the blood of seven humans. He was funny, and much unlike Rosalie, cared about everyone in the family. He even went out of his way to make me feel more at ease when we had to talk as a group. He was my second favorite.
Edward was currently trying to control his power. He tried his best not to intrude on our thoughts. On the slight occasions when he did though, he usually regretted it. I hated him almost as much as I hated Rosalie.
I tried to never leave our room except for "school" and hunting. I hated school. It was pointless torture. And the classes were boring. I didn't need to know what the hell a comma was and why it was needed in certain sentences. And I sure as hell didn't need to know how to calculate the radius of a tire. In our current school, Jasper, Rosalie, and Emmett were in eleventh grade, simply because they looked physically older than Edward and I, and Edward and I were in tenth grade. I hated it so. I only ever saw Jasper during lunch, and even then we only had thirty minutes together. Other than that, I had Edward in every class. We sat next to each other in everyone, "Dr.'s orders."
They wanted to make sure I didn't get too overwhelmed and attack the entire classroom of humans. They knew I wasn't trying very hard to stick to their abnormal diet. It was really a miracle at all that I was going to school. A miracle I didn't want.
In the one thousand, two hundred seventy seven and a half days I had attempted to stick to this ridiculous diet I had "relapsed" twenty times. All in public as well, and all were males. No one saw, and if they did, it probably looked like I was just kissing his wrist or something like that. My eyes had almost been a constant red, and the way we explained this to the school, because Carlisle insisted on me getting a formal education, was that I was half albino. Amazing.
We had an unending amount of money thanks to me, and Rosalie and Esme insisted that I went shopping with them. They made me try on these sometimes hideous dresses and buy them for me. And the expected me to wear everything they bought me. They didn't believe in wearing anything twice. Most of the clothes they bought me went to the floor in my closet, never to be looked at again. I always wore jeans and a simple top, and some sort of jacket.
That's another thing about these Cullen's. They had to wear jackets, and shoes, and scarves and gloves. If they didn't, they would attract attention and would be forced to move. All these pointless little details I never used to have to worry about.
And Jasper was doing wonderfully. He was in control of his thirst, having only killed four humans since moving in with the Cullen's, and he loved everyone. He and Emmett especially got along well. They would wrestle and hunt together. Jasper also took to Carlisle's study sometimes. He would read books about the human mind endlessly. Sometimes I missed him. He would spend every night with me, yes, but that seemed to be the only time I ever saw him.
I never told him, or let him feel, how unhappy it made me, but if I did, he would want to move away to make me happy, and I wouldn't want him to be unhappy because of that. He liked it here, and I didn't want to be the one to complain and have him lose the only family he ever truly loved. I had always just been a mate, someone he was bound to because he wanted to be, and now he had two brothers, a sister, and a mother and father. I wouldn't ruin that for him. I couldn't.
As it turned out, our physical activities weren't noticed, and if they were, no one said anything about them. Rosalie and Emmett were more active than we were, and so this family was already accustomed to it. That was the one thing I truly loved about them.
Usually, like today, we would go home directly after the school day ended, and they would disperse throughout the house. I would always go to my room. Sometimes Jasper would follow, sometimes he wouldn't. I had given up on trying to see when he would follow me. Today was one of the days he followed me.
Once we got to our room I walked to the chair in the corner, and he followed. I said nothing, as usual, but tried to keep a happy emotional blanket over everything else.
"How long?" he asked monotonously. This was something he did every three hundred days.
"One thousand, two hundred seventy eight days," I said quietly. I could hear him nod.
"I know I said just for a while, and I've been meaning to leave lately, but I just can't seem to say goodbye," he said. He picked me up off the chair I was sitting at and took my spot, placing him in my lap.
"It's alright. You're happy, I wouldn't want to change that for anything," I said into his shoulder. He rubbed my back.
"You aren't happy though," he said. "In fact, you're still as uneasy as you were the first day we met them. You think I don't know that?" he asked softly, his chin resting on my head.
I laughed lightly. "I try to hide it," I said.
"And to anyone but me, you're doing a wonderful job. I'm sure that if you just joined them in some of the things they do, you'd be more at ease and wouldn't hate it so much here," he said, trying to reason with me again. It hadn't worked the first time, nor the second, or the third. In fact, the past twenty-eight times hadn't worked. But he insisted on it, obviously.
"Would I get to spend more time with you?" I asked shyly. I felt the muscles on his chin form a smile on his face.
"An enormous amount of more time," he promised. Day one thousand, two hundred and seventy eight was when I formally joined the Cullen family.
I had stopped counting days, and a few years later I was walking down the isle in a white dress. And I was walking towards Jasper, who was in a classic black and white tuxedo. I couldn't help but smile. I remembered the first day with the Cullen's. Looking at the picture of Rosalie and Emmett on their wedding day had frightened me, and now Jasper and I were in their place.
I had even come to like Carlisle, who was currently walking me down the isle. It was a small wedding, but I loved it this way. I still hated Rosalie and Edward, so they were sitting down while Esme was standing on my side of the altar and Emmett was standing next to Jasper. Though as soon as my eyes landed on Jasper I couldn't see anything else.
He was right. The entire time. If I had just put myself into the family more, I wouldn't have hated it as much as I did. Not saying that I loved this life now, but I was trying harder to stick to the diet, and Esme and I were like best friends. And I did see a lot more of Jasper.
The most amazing part of it all though, was that I had come to not wearing the same clothes twice. I even had three pairs of shoes. The diet was still weird for me, and I did crack a few times.
My twenty-eight times of cracking in those one thousand, two hundred and seventy eight days had turned into forty three cracks. And every time I fell through the cracks, Jasper and Esme were there to help me out of them. My eyes, I had noticed, never truly turned completely golden because of this. Instead they were golden with flecks of red in them. Jasper said they were beautiful, but to me, they were different. I was unique.
Life continued like this until 2005. That's when Edward met the one human who he would fall in love with and complicate our lives with. On her eighteenth birthday Esme and Rosalie insisted on giving her a birthday, even after everything with James (I had finally learned about my past) had happened. Then we had to move because of Edward. It wasn't my fault that she had given herself a paper cut. Jasper had barely been able to hold me back, but with Emmett's help they had gotten me into fresh air. And I hadn't felt bad about it in the least bit.
Then later, when we moved back, again because of Edward (oh how I hated him then) they got married. During their honeymoon she got pregnant with a thing that almost killed her, and that lead us to now.
Jasper and I were in our own house, while everyone was at their own houses. I still hated Rosalie and Edward, but my love for Esme and Emmett had only grown. And my dislike for Carlisle had grown to what I had felt for Esme in the beginning. And my love for Jasper had, if possible, grown to exponential rates.
So here we sat, in our living room, with a fire roaring, surrounded by pictures of our years of existence we had spent together. I was curled up in his lap, and he was rubbing soothing circles on my back.
"Jasper?" I asked lightly. He only "hmmed" in response. "I'm scared," I said. He only looked at me with a questioning look. "I mean, before we joined the Cullen's, I had been scared of them, and now I am one of them, even my eyes are the same now, and now I'm scared of what else could happen," I explained quickly.
"Alice, I won't let anything hurt you, this, I promise you," he said. I looked up at him and nodded, with a smile on my face. I kissed him on the lips.
"You have no idea how much I love you," I mumbled, my lips still on his.
"Oh I think I can guess," he said, smiling and kissing back more violently than I had originally planned. Yes, I loved this new life.
This is what I love about writing my own stories. I get to end them as I like. And I personally like this ending. Better than the other four I read which were depressing and required a sequel. Anyway, please review. This story is now over.