A/N: Yay, rewrites.

I Palindrome I

A Buzz Lightyear of Star Command/Lilo & Stitch/Invader ZIM fan fiction

-because I have plenty of time to say both syllables-

abshomema: 1. prototype, early model. A robot built as a test, with the intention of seeing what will work for newer models. 2. The first model built in a line. Lit: experimental robot.

abshomarma: 1. a robot built not to last 2. a robot designed to be destroyed or at least seriously harmed in place of an organic, such as a crash test dummy 3. a robot which will no longer be spent money on in repairs 4. (derogatory) a worthless robot Lit: expendable robot.

Tyrianga-Taim: the name of the elite forces of Star Command (Tyrinorma-Taim). The name literally means 'star ranger' in English but 'space ranger' is interchangeable.
~Newton's Standard/English dictionary, 2010 edition

New job. Model citizen. Capische?
~Cobra Bubbles

10/19/02

4:02 PM

XR entered the cell block at a slow pace, creeping past the cells with frightened looks at their occupants.

So, this was gonna be his punishment. His personal purgatory. The sour fruits of his recent labors.

He shuddered and paused in front of a cell housing a big, beefy guy with six eyes and teal skin. "What're you lookin' at, torkma?" he said.
"Nothing, nothing," XR said, holding his hands up, and continued down the aisle. The big alien didn't scare him- well, maybe a little. Deep down. Since he knew in fact prisoners COULD burst through those walls if sufficiently motivated... okay. He needed to stop thinking about this.

He heard the prisoner, his punishment, before he saw her, not exactly screaming but speaking in a high, loud, desperate voice- "Bread! I can get you bread! Mountains of hot cross buns!"

Promising. He bit his lip and stopped in front of another cell, stalling. This one housed an acidic green blob. It bubbled pseudo-menacingly at XR. He wondered how acidic the thing was, and whether it could eat through the bars. You wouldn't think so. But over the two years, two months of his life, XR had seen a lot of 'you wouldn't think so's turn into 'oh, forget I said that's. He was cautious. Was that such a bad thing, in his line of work?

The monologue from down the hall continued as he watched the blob. "I have connections! I get you upgrades!" Her tone abruptly took a different turn. "I KILL YOU! YOU LET ME OUT HERE RIGHT NOW OR I KILL YOUR MOTHERS!"

"SHUT THE FORSH UP!" another prisoner cried.

"THAT GOES FOR YOU TOO, BLOCKHEAD!" the screeching voice answered.

Very promising. He edged over to the next cell, which housed a rangy, scrawny alien with dark, flinty eyes. Looked like he could slip through the bars if he had half a mind.

XR winced and unconsciously made himself as small as he could. A small, silent part of his mind was very aware of his status as prey surrounded by predators; his presence here was something akin to that of a mouse wandering the rows of cages of stray cats in an animal shelter.

Kila yowled like a cat from the end of the room. XR considered what would happen if he just left. Took the vehicle he'd been given for prisoner transport and rocketed off to the Federation. Started over. Maybe he'd become a bounty hunter.

No, when you thought about it he was really more of the accountant type... or a librarian. He closed his eyes. He could sit in his chair behind his desk and shush anyone that came in. Quiet. Solitude. Power tripping. The hum of the information databanks. The sound of large machinery had always soothed him.

"A-Tyr," a deep voice said. He stiffened.

One of the guard bots clamped a hand on his shoulder. He yelped. The robot's touch felt somehow condemning. For a scary half-moment he was irrationally certain he was about to be thrown into a cell of his own. "Whoa- hey!" he stammered, and then, idiotically- "Hey, how's it going-"

"Prisoner pickup," the bot said.

XR shuddered. Yeah. Punishment. Right. "Uh. Haha. Yeah, that's me." He swallowed.

Behind them Kila yelled- "What? Prisoner pickup? Who is that?" Her voice was suddenly accusatory and his inner parts ground together uncomfortably. He hadn't eaten a thing all day. He'd been thinking about this too much.

"Prisoner pickup," the guardbot repeated, pulling on XR's shoulder. He suddenly found himself face-to-face with one Kila Ann Jookiba.

She blinked at him. It felt like he was seeing her for the first time. On Tradeworld he'd been so... scattered he hadn't fully appreciated how strange she was. She looked like a wild animal (complete with fur), her back arched and her claws hooking into the bars of the cell. Her narrow, flat chest rapidly inflated and deflated and her tail flicked through the air in an arc. Her eyes were amber glass prosthetics, robot eyes. They were wide and staring. Freaky.

"A-Tyr?" she said now, and her voice was small and high like a child's, with a Jukani accent. "Is that really you or have I finally snapped?"

Finally? He cleared his throat with a metallic clicking noise. "Uhh..."

"A-TYR!" she said, straightening up. At her fullest height she only came a little past the base of his helmet. "Get me out of here!" He flinched. "I do you favor and now you-"

One of the guardbots started unlocking the door to her cell. She gasped. He flinched powerfully.

The guardbot went inside and grabbed her wrist, unheeding of the fact that she spat and swore in what sounded like no less than four different languages (one of which he didn't even recognize), and that her small claws scored dozens of small gray lines through the paint on the guy's arm. The guard then dragged her over to XR amid her screams of rage and his cries that he wasn't ready. (Not that he ever would be.) He took her arm against his better judgment, making a face. She miraculously, mercifully went silent as he did so, staring about her in shock. She was hot to the touch, fever-hot, and wiry and- fluffy, a weird combination, and she had a... a clinging smell of woodsmoke. Odd.

"Okay," XR said as he clipped one end of a pair of handcuffs onto her wrist. He hesitated for a moment, wondering if maybe the other end should go on his own wrist. Then he decided he really didn't want to do that and just put it on her other arm. She looked down at the cuffs with a dismayed expression that was really sorta funny. He didn't feel like laughing, however.

"Okay," he repeated, putting his hands on his hips and watching as she continued to stare dully at the cuffs. She looked utterly lost. Well, at least she wasn't trying to kill him yet. "Here's the thing. Commander Nebula put me in charge of you. Okay? I'm gonna have you in personal custody for the next two months."

She gave him a look of utter despair. A prisoner from one of the other cells suddenly yelled- "Hey! That's A-Tyr!"

"A-Tyr?" another voice rumbled. XR did a double-take. He knew that voice. He didn't know where he knew it from, but it couldn't be from anywhere good.

"Uh, why don't we do this somewhere else," he said, pulling her back out through the cell block.

"Wait!" Kila cried, her voice high and frightened. "What's going on here? Where am I going?"

The ominously familiar voice sounded again as he flew towards the door. "A-TYR, YOU LITTLE FORSHMA! WHEN I GET OUT OF HERE-"

He turned a corner, cutting off the intelligibility of the voice- it continued behind them in a muffled, wordless rumble. "Wow," Kila said beside him, blinking. "He didn' like you."

"Didn't he?" XR said. "Wow. I had no idea. I'm crushed."

She sniffed and shuddered, her slim shoulders bunching. "You haven't answered my questions." In his frazzle he forgot that he HAD answered them and she apparently hadn't listened. "What is going on? Are they finally letting me out?"

He shot a glance back at her. This little creature in her baggy orange jumpsuit with her staring eyes. Ah, geez... "Oh, for crying out loud, will you give me a minute? I'm trying to think here! And no, they're not letting you out."

She immediately tried to struggle out of his grip. He yelped and hung on, managing to ride out her flails. It was hard. She was shockingly strong for something so tiny.

"Okay. Don't do that again!" he snapped once she was done. "Ugh!" He was already getting a migraine. "Look. Kila. I'm not the devil. I'm just a robot in a bad position, much like yourself. Now-"

"Am I going to PC-7?"

"No, you aren't going to PC-7! And don't interrupt!" She hissed at him like a cat. He flinched. "I'm taking you into personal custody for two months on Commander Nebula's orders!" He half-shrugged one shoulder, twitching the corner of his mouth apologetically. "And if that doesn't reform you, well, then you're probably going to PC-7."

She gave him a blank look, then started to struggle again. He hung on grimly.

"Amé kef, you're strong," she said finally, panting and going limp.

Well, she was tiny. He sure hoped he was stronger than her. "Thanks. All right. Look, kid." He rapidly flipped through his mental files, searching for some idea of what to say. "I don't like this any more than you do. Okay?" His voice was wary, probing, feeling her out. "So instead of-"

"Fascist pig."

The Galactic Alliance has no concept of 'fascist', only 'good' and 'evil'. The words Kila used to describe this concept held no meaning for XR. He understood 'pig' perfectly though.

"Oh, shut up and consider yourself lucky. You're not on PC-7," he snapped, dragging her down the hallway. His motor was ticking. She was going to be difficult, wasn't she. He couldn't do this.

"I'd have my own TV on PC-7," she was saying.

He closed his eyes. "Yeah, whatever."

"Where are we going?"

He stopped, looking around at the hallway around him. LGMs and space rangers milled about aimlessly on either side. They looked quite large. He didn't know why he should suddenly notice this so much...

"Um," he said.

She tugged on his arm, a hopeless, half-hearted motion. He ignored it.

"I don't know, what do you do with a prisoner?" he complained, pulling her over to the side of the hallway. He slumped against the wall. A prisoner he didn't know, to boot. All he knew about Kila was that she couldn't hoverboard, and she'd ratfinked on him to Star Command when the going got rough.

She slumped against the wall beside him, restlessly running her claws behind one ear. "I hope that was rhetorical."

"It was. It was rhetorical. I know exactly what I'm going to do with you." He folded his arms over his chest, pouting.

"You do not," she said, struggling. Her tone became anxious. "Look, I cut you a deal. I have money, all right?"

He frowned, glancing sideways at her. He had a pretty good idea where this was going. "Good. So do I."

"I work for you. I clean cars."

Was she insane? Could she not see they were surrounded by rangers? "Okay, I know where this is heading, and no. I can't. Trust me."

She looked away, scowling. "Curse you!"

XR looked up at the ceiling, sighing. "Uh... look. Why d-don't we talk in private?" he said.

"How long are we doing this? Two mont's?" she said in tones of utter disgust, twisting the handcuffs.

"Yeah..."

"That sucks."

XR jerked in surprise and said "You shut up! You're the prisoner here, see, and I decide what sucks!" Part of him was by this time going what are you doing, you sound like an idiot, but he was too angry to listen.

She hissed, baring blunt fangs. "Bite me!"

He turned on her, baring his own teeth. "Listen here, kid! You're already in enough trouble, so I suggest you ditch the attitude problem!"

She looked away, scowling. He yanked on her some more.

"I'll never tell you anyt'ing," she said, tossing her head.

"Y'had no problem ratting me out," he snapped. "Ya little green fink."

When she spoke again her voice was subdued. "Where are we going?"

He thought for a second. XR had little experience with going anywhere outside of work so his choices were limited. In fact, there was only one real choice.

"Cosmo's."

4:12 PM

XR drummed his fingers on the table, frowning. Across from him Kila looked over her shoulder, brushing at her ears. Her tail was thumping against the side of the booth and she kept flinching at nothing. Her ears twitched every so often and she kept scuffling her paws on the table, or jerking her head sideways in an unnerving nervous tic. Or baring her teeth. Or- did she ever hold still? It was sort of mesmerizing, the constant-

"See something green, butthead?" she snapped.

He jerked in surprise. "What? No. I mean, you. But- oh, never mind."

He looked away. What could he say to this creature in front of him? Their last meeting had not been pleasant. Neither had the one before that. Or the one before that. Or the- okay, he hadn't known her that long.

"What do you mean, me?"

"Your fur. What else."

She fell mercifully silent. He tried to remember what he did know about her. Apparently she became violent in captivity. Also, apparently she was hard to trace. She'd gone by several aliases, such as 'Kate Johnson' (strange and foreign-sounding to XR's Alliance-calibrated audio sensors), 'Kiri Jorbaki' (Jukani), 'Rusty Shackleford' (odd), 'Amy Grant,' 'Joy King' (it was a long list), 'Misty Lunt' (mind-boggling), 'Lisa-Marie Presley' (downright unpronounceable) and 'Heat Miser'. That one was more normal- 'Mishyr' is a common last name in the Alliance.

No one had managed to pry her homeworld out of her, but it was probably the planet Jukani, since she had a Jukani accent and Jukani name. It was confusing, though, because Kila didn't resemble either of the main races on that planet- the short, stocky, four-eared Klorin or the huge, rounded, four-eyed Jalobin.

In fact she was nothing like them. At all. So, while she may have been born on Jukani her parents were definitely from elsewhere. If he found out where that'd earn him some points, he'd be sure to press for it.

As for what XR had learned of her from personal experience... well, she had a habit of stirring her drinks with ice in them, making the ice rattle around obnoxiously. He remembered this because she was currently doing it.

"Stop that."

She hissed. "Shut up, government man!"

This was a good start. Yes. Very nice. "Okay, here's a proposition for you. You don't call me that again or stir the ice around and I won't bash your little fat head in."

Y'had to be tough with these street punks. Specially the crazy, annoying ones that ratted you out to Star Command when you went to them for help.

She narrowed her eyes. "I'd like to see you try."

"Oh, I could do it."

"I could stick my hand in a blender and hit puree, but it wouldn't be a good idea."

XR shrank away a little. "Well, excuuuuse me."

There was another agonizing silence. Finally Kila swallowed.

He jumped about a foot. She shook her head, scowling.

"What?" he snapped. "What do you want?"

"Nothing. I was just swallowing, for Pete's sake."

This was going poorly. He started to search for topics. Anything.

"What are they experimenting with?"

He jumped again.

"Amé kef," Kila drawled, shaking her head. "Something is wrong wit' you. I mean, for Pete's sake-"

"Stop startling me, then!"

"I'm barely doing anything, pansy."

"Could you possibly get any more insulting?"

"Try me."

He scowled. "Maybe I WILL!"

"HEY!" That was an unfamiliar voice, and they both jumped, yelping. A tall, clean-cut looking guy was standing over them. "Is something wrong here?"

XR blinked at him, then looked over at Kila, who was sitting there frozen. He turned back to the guy. "Oh, uhh... no. N-no. Nothing wrong here."

"Everything's fine," Kila said in response, rather petulantly and her claws scuffled on the table.

The strange guy nodded, frowning, and left. XR slumped in his chair, groaning. "Geez..."

Her eyes found his suddenly, wide and angry. He jerked. "Hey, I asked you a question," she said.

He sighed. "Oh for crying out loud. Whatever shuts you up. What was the question again?"

"I asked why your name has abshomema in it."

He blinked. "Well, that's an odd question." She was giving him a funny look, too. She was watching him just a little bit too closely and she was stirring her drink again. "That's an odd, irrevelant question."

"Irrelevant, not irrevelant. Yes. Well, it's small talk. You never hear that before?" Her shoulders hunched and her ice-stirring increased in tempo.

He scoffed. He couldn't see where this information would get her. Well, whatever. "I don't know. I'm the first robot ranger. Well, technically XL was first but he's a fax machine now, so-"

"So you are a kitoritom'k. Only a robot." And she stirred the ice faster.

XR scowled at her. 'Kitoritom'k' was one of the few pieces of Jukani he knew, due to it describing a hot-button issue- genetic experimentation. Such experiments were illegal in the Federation. The Jukani lived on the fringe of the Federation, and their scientists held a long tradition of genetic experimentation, meaning they had a hard time conforming to the 'no test tube creatures' rule. Their word for it snuck into Federation news a lot. They were always fighting over experimentation over there. How petty.

Anyway... he wasn't that experimental! 'Kitoritom'k'? How dare she! "No, abshomema. Prototype. There's a BIG difference!"

"Oh, okay?"
"I'm not some kind of freak, understand, I'm just a new model. That's all." He looked away, scowling.

Her eyes narrowed. Well, what was her problem? She'd said something frankly offensive and he had every right to be offended. She was just getting more endearing by the minute, wasn't she?

"I see. Well, it's obvious what side you're on. Fine. Just fine. Go ahead and jump all over me for conversation. FINE!"

He scuffed at the floor under the table with one tread, narrowing his eyes. "Make different conversation next time, then. Geez."

She had to know how insulting it was to imply to a robot that they could somehow not be well-suited for their job. And experimental technology was prone to glitches. Glitches weren't well-tolerated in the robot world. For crying out loud, his sister had been kicked out of the weekly meets over her glitches.

(So many character flaws!)

He shuddered.

She scuffled her paws on the table AGAIN (probably scratching it up in the process, hopefully they wouldn't get in trouble over it), then looked up sharply. "I don't like this any more than you do, bud."

Finally some sense. XR folded his hands on the table. "Given that you are in fact the prisoner in this situation I gathered as much."

"Aren't you funny," she said, baring one fang.

"I like to think so," he said with an ingratiating grin.

Kila raised an eyebrow at him. "Well, anyway." She drummed her fingers on the table, glancing over her shoulder. "So, I... two mont's. Ai-yi-yee." Rolling her eyes, or attempting to. No pupils, mind.

"No kidding," he said, slumping back in his seat. What could they possibly do in all that time? Commander Nebula hadn't exactly given him an itinerary.

Because he thinks it's not worth it, that's why.

He shook his head vehemently. Bad thought. FALSE thought.

Kila folded her arms over her chest, looking away and twitching her tail. He groped around for conversation and settled on "So. Where ya from?"
How original.

She scowled, not looking at him. "That's classified."

Well, what did he expect? "Look, your unco-operative attitude will only make things worse for you in the long run. Why don't you just-"

"Jawohl, mein Fuehrer," she said from behind her menu.

XR's eyebrows furrowed. "Eh?"

"Nothing."

He watched her, frowning. Well, geez, he was just stating the facts... "So... how'd you get involved with Pixma in the first place?" he asked. There. THAT was productive. "She's crazy."

"I am also crazy," she said, pawing at her ears. "Good for me. No."

No arguments there. He almost said it aloud, but didn't. He needed to be nice to this girl. Impress Commander Nebula with his skills with the prisoner. He could do that much.

Suddenly she started talking again, with an undercurrent of desperation in her voice. "Not that this is ANY of your freaking bidness, but I don't want your little imagination going wild. Look, I come over from Federation, no money, she was the only person who'd hire me-" She rolled her eyes. "Of course, now I know why..."

"It didn't occur to you that it was a bad idea to work for someone evil?" he said, folding his hands under his chin and resting them against the glass of his helmet.

"Well, not everyone goes out and says they're evil," she snapped.

He rolled his eyes. "You could've asked."

"For crying out loud, what kind of retarded question is that?" she cried, spreading her paws apart. "'Hey, lady, you evil?' 'Yep, sure am. I kick bunnies!' I mean, what the crap?"

He raised an eyebrow. "I don't see anything wrong with that. She's probably just waiting to stick her affiliation in your face. They usually are."

She sighed and looked away, brushing irritably at her ears. "Well, where I come from people aren't like that. No one wants to say they're evil. Because they're intelligent, mind."

He blinked. "So you are from the Federation."

"General direction," she mumbled.

He recoiled involuntarily. Ugh! That place! He'd already pretty much guessed from her Jukani-ness- that planet bordered the Federation on the far side of the Alliance, which was fine with XR because he never wanted to see the surface of THAT place- but still, ugh, how gross. Bunch of weirdoes over there. Didn't even have affiliations. He couldn't imagine how confusing that must be.

"I see," he said, noticing the new degrees of coolness in his voice.

"I'm not a heathen," she grumbled.

Might as well be. "'Course not."

"I'm a Presbyterian." Whatever that was.

She continued to whinily defend herself. XR tuned her out, musing over this new issue. Hm. She was foreign. (Well, of course she was.) Uneducated in the ways of the Alliance. And so far, she wasn't behaving violently, at least.

Well, well, well. This had some promise after all. The goal of delivering Commander Nebula a polite, clean-cut, hard-working, good-aligned individual at the end of the two months might not be so out of reach after all.

"All right then," he said, startling her out of some tangent. "Tomorrow, Kila, you're gonna learn something about how things work in our world."

She gave him a cold look. "Oh goody."

"Yep," he said with a grin. And for the first time all day he took a sip of oil.

6:46 PM

The rest of the dinner was comparatively uneventful. XR learned his charge was relatively young and had been hopping the universe looking for jobs. (Yeah, yeah, she'd already told this to Buzz and Booster.) When she'd been hired by Pixma, she'd merely thought of it as another opportunity to not starve (XR shook his head sorrowfully at this- what a sad, confused little girl she was) and she'd taken the job gladly. She actually hadn't worked there very long before getting fired and that had been months ago, she had no idea why she was being arrested for it now. (All this had already been explained to Mira, almost word-for-word.)

Anyway, she had no grandiose conquest schemes in mind, she explained. (Suuure she didn't.) She'd just wanted to work her way up to a good career- but, well, before she'd met that goal she'd been arrested. (All this had been rattled off to Commander Nebula.) Yes, the way she told it, butter wouldn't melt in her mouth. Lying through her teeth, obviously, the little punk. Yep, it was all crap. Hey, XR would have done it himself.
Then they'd gone out to the car together. Once they got in the car XR realized he had no idea where to take this girl. Star Command was still pretty bustling this time of night so he didn't want to stay there, and they'd just been at Cosmo's. Where else? He wasn't flying her all the way out to Mohambas 6.

Currently, he was orbiting Capital Planet in a lazy loop while considering his options. The orbiting was kinda fun, actually. He liked to drive (not that he was too terrific at it) and he'd never had his own car.

"So... where are we going?" Kila asked.

"That's for me to know and you to find out."

She scowled. "You have no idea."

"I do too!" he snapped. "We're orbiting."

She sighed and slumped back in her seat, folding her arms over her narrow chest (which his eyes kept going to in disgust- NOT because he was a pervert or anything, seriously, it was just the... smallest part of her body, her chest, and that was just wrong). He realized suddenly that over the course of the conversation, she'd never actually revealed where she'd come from before all the planet-hopping.

"Uh, so," he said. "Do you have parents anywhere?"

"They run a glue factory in Tucson," she said absent-mindedly.

XR furrowed his eyebrows. "Toshon?" (Standard has no 'u' sound.) "Where's that?" XR had been all over the Alliance, and he'd never heard of any place called Toshon...

She froze, her paws flailing. "Nowhere! Nothing! I didn't say anything!"

He raised his eyebrows. "Oookaaay."

"What about your parents? Scrapbucket," she grumbled, hugging her knees. "You don't even have any because you're a stupid bucket of rust-"

The words spilled out before he could remember the training- no space ranger EVER answered a prisoner's question. (Of course, this was a rather unusual situation anyway.) "Hey, my kyrshama is Commander of Star Command!"

She turned to blink at him. "Your what?"

"Kyrshama, for Pete's sake!"

"What's that?"

He blinked. "Uhh-" 'Kyrshama' means 'builder of a robot', the closest thing a robot had to a parent. Literally, 'creator robot'. The 'of' was implied.
But, of course, Commander Nebula didn't literally build XR... "Commander Nebula signed my work order," he found himself explaining. "He-"

He started to get one of those warm fuzzy feelings and tears pricked at his eyes. He put his helmet down to rub them back. "He brought me into this world, you know..." he said, in a choked voice.

Kila squirmed a little and looked away, hunching her shoulders. Pfft, she probably had one of those stupid angsty troubled-youth sob stories. Y'know, drunken mom, abusive dad... stripper sister... brother a tax collector.

Can't be any worse than XL and May, he thought, then he shook his head, blinking. Of course, he meant XL back when he was a villain. XL was fine now. And May... she was his sister. She was FINE.

But she's defective.

He squirmed, then snapped "It's none of your business, you little punk!"

"Alrigh'?" she said, raising an eyebrow. "Well, someone missed their nap."

His eyes narrowed. "Shaddup."

Silence fell, apart from the hum of the ship's engine. XR had always found the sound of large engines comforting. He closed his eyes to listen for a minute, feeling almost-drowsy (he hadn't been sleeping well lately) then realized he was still driving and there was a car coming at them. He yanked the steering wheel with a cry of "Road hog!"

"Yeah!" Kila echoed and he rolled his eyes at her.

"Oh, stay out of this."

She looked away, scowling. "Killjoy."

"Streetbunny," he countered, drawing a very odd look. He avoided the look, burying himself in the controls.

"Pukebucket," she said finally.

"Kila, we're both adults here. You're only making a fool of yourself." Under his breath he added "Ax crazy."

She sighed and slumped against the door. He noticed an odd choker necklace around her neck. Dark green and studded with what looked like thorns. Apparently it was supposed to look like a vine. He frowned. For one thing, it looked disturbingly real, for another thing... should she be wearing jewelry? Shouldn't that have been confis "What about you?"

He jumped.

"Where do you hail from before Star Command?" she asked. "Mm? You like questions, is a question."

Oh. Uh. "Whaddaya mean, before Star Command?" he scoffed, forgetting about the vine.

"Well, you apparently have a parent, so what was I supposed to think? Just answer it, pansy."

He shook his head, glancing out the window. His lips clamped together and his eyes narrowed slightly. "I've never worked anywhere but Star Command," he said, his voice cold and forceful. He was loath to consider what she must think of him if she thought there was even a possibility he'd be capable of losing a job and needing to be hired somewhere else. It would mean he'd failed his directive. Golly, he'd have to be such a loser. Worse.

He shuddered a little.

He'd be defective.

"Oh," Kila was saying neutrally. "So you've never done anything but ranger around."

"Course not," he said rather shortly. Of course, he had come sort of close to losing his job before but he hadn't because he wasn't a failure, he wasn't broken, he wasn't and she was just trying to psych him out!

She studied the dashboard. Obviously shamed by the failure of her mind game. He blinked. She wasn't wearing that weird vine necklace anymore. Huh... had he imagined the thing? That wasn't possible, was it?

"Girlfriend?" she said.

What? That was quite the change of subject. "Whaddaya call me?" he said, blinking.

"I'm asking if you have a girlfriend," she said.

"Oh," XR said, biting his lip. A girlfriend. A woman. Someone to love. That was... a good question. One he might have asked her (only genderflipped obviously) if she hadn't been so depressingly homely that the answer was obvious. "Well, I wouldn't say... it's not that I... well, not currently. But-" Then it hit him that there was only one possible reason to ask that question and he froze. That was a MAJOR change in subject.

"I'm asking because you seem to have no life," she said, unwittingly contradicting him. Of course. What'd she say to him back on Tradeworld? 'I'm not your kef'ti date' (he'd asked around for the meaning of that word, by the way, and it wasn't flattering), and that was a reaction to a spur-of-the-minute lie to Booster on the phone. She wasn't interested, thank goodness.

His eyes narrowed. "Hey. I have plenty of a life. I've had plenty of romance, I just don't have a relationship in the present." Well, if by 'plenty of romance' you meant one girlfriend. Who'd dumped him after... three hours. Um. And then wound up transferring to Galaxy Defense Industries. A galaxy away.

He cleared his throat and drummed his fingers on the dashboard. "And I don't think you realize how exciting being a space ranger really is. I get to go all over the Gamma Quadrant. Why, I've seen Tradeworld, Tangea, Jo-Ad-"

"Oh, the hick planet, very nice," she said, leaning back in her seat and yanking absent-mindedly on the handcuffs.

Stupid two-bit skank, he thought, and said "Don't you dare try to patronize me. You're a civilian. And a convict, by the way." He punched a code into the control pad, scowling. "Not to mention you have no idea what you're talking about."

7:21 PM

Not long after that he decided it was high time she went back to the lock-up for the night. She became increasingly nervous the closer they got to her cell. Twitchy, stare-y, swishy tail, the whole nine yards. When they got to the door, she actually turned and clung to his chest which was neither cute nor funny, since she still had claws and they hurt.

He gave her a baleful stare. Oh, come now. Seriously? This was just pathetic.

She looked submissively down at the floor, one ear twitching. "I don't- I don't have to go in there yet," she said, suddenly subdued.

Typical Tradeworld punk behavior. All tough and mean until they see who's really in charge. Oh, yeah.

"Ohhh yes you do," he said, peeling her off of him and pushing her into the cell. It closed after her and she turned, pathetically clutching the bars and staring at him, wide-eyed and panting.

He blinked. Gee, she sure looked scared... eh, whatever. Just showed she knew who was in charge, that was all.

Right?

He shrugged uncomfortably and turned away. "See ya tomorrow."

"Where are you going?" she screamed as he treaded away. "You can't do this! Don't just-" He was almost out of earshot when she screamed- "YOU CAN'T LEAVE ME IN HERE ALONE!"

It was followed by a choked sob. Oh. Well. That was... unexpected.

XR shuddered. It could just be an act, he told himself as he wrung his hands. It had to be an act. She'd mauled a guardbot earlier in her captivity. Not just scratched it, tore its chest panel off with her teeth. (Which meant it would be a good thing if he had some protection from her, he realized, but whatever. It was too late for that now. Commander Nebula wouldn't have given him any if he'd asked, anyway.)

As he approached the science bay, he heard a noise. He looked up to see Frank standing by the wall.

"Hey," he said, eyeing the grub. He didn't like Frank. Guy was a wimp.

"Hello," Frank said, clearing his throat. "Do you know if Commander Nebula is around?"

"He's working a night shift every night this week, why?"

"No reason," Frank said, and scurried off.

Well, that was weird. XR tried to think about it, but couldn't make his mind go. He was exhausted.

He staggered into the science bay. XL was sitting near the back of the room, working on some kind of project on one of the LGM's worktables. MALIK was sitting perched on the edge of the table all the way on the other end, looking stiff. She was pouting slightly. That was a weird thing about her. She hated being off duty, something XR would NEVER understand.

For one crazy moment he considered telling her Frank was acting funny, almost suspicious, but it'd be like siccing a crater viper on a tame sand rat. Not even a little bit fair.

Instead he said "Hey guys."

"Prototype," MALIK said coldly, and XL grunted.

XR wondered why he bothered, then he said "I'm going to bed."

MALIK sighed. "I might as well do that myself... since everyone's gone home." The disdain in her voice was clear. XR rolled his eyes and went to his charger.

Soon he'd forgotten all about Frank.