Author: Kiki (Hey-Diddle-Diddle)

Genre: Tragedy

Rating: PG

Summary: Pre-game, post-Nibelheim. A slight slaughtering of canon. They're friends, right? Platonic love, yo. Zack/Cloud. Sorta.

He hasn't touched Cloud for a long time. He's not really sure how long-- Days, months-- He prays to God it hasn't been years, because everything's been dragging on for so long, Hojo and mako and needles sliding under his skin. And he really doesn't want to think it's been years, because if it has--

But it's easier to just reach in and grab Cloud, his fingers sliding over Cloud's skin. Cloud falls out of tube, heavy and limp in Zack's arms, and Zack tries to hold on as he stumbles back, slipping in the mako on the floor. They end up in a heap, Zack curling his arms around Cloud's head, and he just lies there for a few minutes, breathing, and feeling Cloud breathe on top of him.

Cloud's breathing is slow. In, beat beat, out, beat beat beat, in, beat beat, out, beat beat beat. It feels good, to feel Cloud, feel Cloud's slow heartbeat and slower breathing, but good doesn't mean shit down here, and maybe it won't mean shit anywhere, with ShinRa turned crazy and Hojo turned god-like, but it might mean more in Midgar. For a while, at least.

x

Everything in Zack's body hurts, deep down into the bones. He feels like he's bruised all over, beaten black and blue for as long he's been Hojo's pet, and each day, it feels worse, rather than better. The sunlight burns his eyes, reflecting off the snow, and he has to close his eyes, count to five before he opens them again. It still burns, probably more this time, but he just squints his eyes closed, and starts walking.

Cloud's hanging off his back, his thin arms, still green-stained, looped around Zack's neck. Every few yards Zack has to grab at Cloud, hike him up higher, and Cloud whimpers against Zack's neck each time. It's the most Zack's gotten out of Cloud, but Zack's a beaten man now, and he'll take anything he can get.

x

Some of Hojo's pets catch up to them before they reach the ocean. Zack throws himself underneath a river-side ledge, dragging Cloud after him. Cloud's feet tangle, tripping him, and Zack swears as he pulls Cloud up, further underneath the ledge. He wraps his arms around Cloud, presses his face against Cloud's shoulder, and prays.

"Don't scream, don't scream," he mouths against the cloth over Cloud's shoulder. "Don't scream."

He can hear the dogs running a hundred yards away, then fifty. Cloud's chest rises, falls, and rises again, stops.

"Don't scream," Zack says desperately, and the dogs are running on, and Cloud's mouth is open, and silent.

When the dogs are a couple miles away, and Zack can barely hear them, he laughs. Cloud's chest shakes beneath his arms, and Zack tightens them, holds Cloud tighter, and laughs until his face is wet.

He feels like he's going crazy.

x

By the time they get to the other continent, summer's half-over. The half-year of running hasn't been kind, and Zack feels tired, hurts more than ever. He walks slower now, Cloud's arm slung over his shoulder, and Cloud stumbles along beside him, eyes half-open and dull.

Cloud's hair is long and tangled, matted in clumps, and when they're clear of the coast, Zack drags Cloud to a stream, seats him on a rock.

"Hold still," he says, and he pulls Cloud's hair straight, hacks at it with his bootknife. The hair falls in chunks, dragged away by the stream's current. By the end, Zack's going slowly, carefully, trying to trim the ends as evenly as he can. Hairs, baby-soft and thin, float down, tickling Zack's hands, Cloud's ears and neck. Cloud's eyes are half-closed, and his mouth is moving, like he's trying to remember how to smile.

"Better?" Zack asks, and he brushes his thumb over Cloud's mouth, trying to catch the stray hairs. Cloud makes a sound, and Zack rubs his thumb at the corner of Cloud's mouth. "You wanna smile?"

He kisses Cloud, then goes and dunks his head in the stream, then hacks at his hair until his ears and neck are nicked and bleeding, and he can think straight again.

x

He pulls Cloud up onto the bed of the truck, and when they're both seated, Cloud propped up against the back of the cab, Zack hits the side of the cab. The driver takes off, truck kicking up dust from the road, and Zack leans back, looking up at the sky. It's hot, the sun burning his eyes, but the sky is a bright blue, like Cloud's eyes used to be.

The road's long and bumpy, like country roads back home, and Zack closes his eyes, feels himself drifting. It's nice like this, feels like half a decade ago, when they were bumping along road after road, Cloud trying to sleep off the trip and Zack playing cards with anyone who didn't care about cheating.

He squints up at the sky, just a sliver of blue in his eyes, and dreams about everything, Sephiroth and Aerith, his mom and dad. He feels like he's half-asleep, and he lets his head loll to the side, the sliver of blue turning to a sliver of blond. He reaches out, and Cloud's hair is soft in his hand, tickles his wrist when he scruffles at Cloud's hair.

Cloud's eyes are still dull, almost gray, but they look a little more blue, and Zack doesn't know if he's dreaming, or if he's sun-blind, but things are getting better, the further down the bumpy road the truck sputters. He scruffles at Cloud's hair harder, then turns Cloud's head towards him, tilts Cloud's chin so Cloud's looking at him.

"We're friends, right?" Zack asks, 'cause he needs to know there's something in there to be friends with, that he's not just floating along in some insane dream of his, that he's not still in the mako tube, drowning in green. "We're friends?"