Author: iloveromance PM
For Elaine, life after prison is hard; but even harder is dealing with her unexplained feelings for Jerry.Rated: Fiction K+ - English - Hurt/Comfort/Romance - Chapters: 27 - Words: 15,741 - Reviews: 69 - Favs: 18 - Follows: 2 - Updated: 10-01-08 - Published: 09-05-08 - Status: Complete - id: 4520028
|A+ A- Full 3/4 1/2 Expand Tighten|
"Can you believe it?" Jerry Seinfeld exclaimed as he sat with George, Kramer and Elaine in the prison cafeteria. "We're actually getting out of here tomorrow!"
"Thank God..." Elaine groaned. She shoved her mashed potatoes around on her plate. "I cannot take this food ANYMORE! Look at me!" She tugged at her orange jumpsuit that had been her wardrobe for the past year. "I must have lost ten pounds!"
"And you're complaining?" Jerry asked, incredulous. "I thought women loved it when they lost weight."
"Yeah, but not in PRISON, JERRY!" Elaine yelled, attracting glances from other inmates.
"I'll tell you what I'm not going to miss..." George said. "All those guys asking for my phone number."
"I think you mean women, don't you George?" Jerry asked.
"Do I?" George asked, nodding at the look of astonishment on Jerry's face.
"Oh man, I can't WAIT to get out of here." Kramer said. "Harvey and I are gonna go into business together."
"Who's Harvey?" George asked.
"Cell Block D". Kramer replied.
George was shocked. "You asked a murderer to go into business with you? What are you, crazy?"
"He's not a murderer." Kramer said.
"George scoffed. "Yeah, and the Soup Nazi is a saint!"
"Oh man, I would love to have a bowl of crab bisque right now." Jerry said dreamily. "If only someone hadn't interfered!"
All three men glared at Elaine.
"You're defending the Soup Nazi? He's the reason we're in this place!" Elaine yelled, turning heads once more.
"Elaine, I tried to tell you..." said Jerry. "Let the man make his soup!"
"But Jerry, I-"
Jerry shushed her. "I'm trying to be on my best behavior! I want to get out of here, because I have some shows lined up."
"Really?" George asked. "How did you manage that?"
Jerry motioned for the others to lean in closer. "Well, I snuck in a few extra phone calls yesterday." He whispered.
"Did you call NBC about our pilot?" George asked.
Exasperated, Jerry threw his hands in the air. "No, George... I did not call NBC about the pilot."
George rose to his feet. "Well, why not?! Jerry, we were this close! This close! It could have been a big hit!"
"George, shut up!" Jerry hissed. "We'll get sent to solitary confinement!"
"Come on, Jerry!" George pleaded. "They said they'd be willing to look at it again!"
"I don't want to talk about it." Jerry said.
Frustrated, George threw down his napkin and slumped into his chair; defeated. "All right. You win."
"Hey, don't you guys want to hear about my new business proposition?" Kramer asked.
"No!" said Jerry, George and Elaine in unison.
"Ah man! It was a brilliant idea!" Kramer whined.
Jerry rolled his eyes. "All right, Cosmo, what's this brilliant idea of yours?"
Suddenly a gleam of enthusiasm shone in Kramer's eyes. "Okay, listen to this..." He paused for a brief second, smiling at his three friends, watching in anticipation.
"Make-your-own merchandise." Kramer said. He stepped away from the table and gave his friends a proud smile, pausing for effect.
Jerry, George and Elaine stared blankly at one another.
"You're kidding, right?" Jerry said with a smirk on his face.
"No, I'm not. This is genius! See-"
"Make your own merchandise?" Elaine scoffed. "What the hell is that?"
Kramer smiled. "Well you go into the store and-"
"Hold on a minute..." Jerry interrupted. "Why would anyone want to pay to have to make their own products? That's what manufacturers are for!"
"Well Newman is in on it too, and-"
"Oh well, there's a comforting thought." Jerry said.
"Uh oh... Here comes trouble." Elaine said as three guards approached their table.
"Come on, get up you four. It's time to go." The burly man said. He grabbed George and Elaine by the forearm.
"Ouch, Let go of me!" Elaine yelled, struggling to release his grip on her.
"Excuse me..." George began. "I don't mean for this to sound rude, but you're hurting this innocent woman."
"Innocent, huh?" The guard said. "Well if she was innocent, she wouldn't be in here!" The two other men started laughing.
George laughed nervously. "Okay, see now that was rude, but I'm willing to let it slide if you'll just..."
"George!" Jerry said. "What are you doing?"
"Well, Jerry, it's obvious he's hurting her!" George said.
"Come on, let's go." The second guard said. "The signal sounded to go back to your cells almost four minutes ago."
"Please, sir. I'm begging you..." Elaine whimpered. "Let go of my arm!"
"Not a chance, lady! Now MOVE IT!" The guard yelled, tightening his grip on her Elaine's arm. The force of his voice caused them all to jump.
"All right, ENOUGH!" Kramer yelled, startling the guard. "You are a jackass, you know that? Let go of the woman's arm NOW!"
Jerry, George and Elaine looked at Kramer in horror.
"What was that, Kramer?" The guard asked, releasing his grip on Elaine's arm.
"You heard me, you're a JACKASS!" Kramer yelled.
Unbelievably the guard was unfazed by Kramer's insult.
Kramer noticed Jerry and George's looks of horror and winked.
"How did you like that, boys?" he asked when the guard turned away.
"Wow... Even Superman doesn't even have that kind of power!" Jerry quipped.
"Jerry! We could die here and you're making jokes?" George asked.
"Come on, Funny man! You too, Tubby" the guard said he and the second guard grabbed Jerry and George and escorted them out of the cafeteria.
"Tubby?" George repeated. "Did you hear that, Jerry?"
"Yes, George..." Jerry said under his breath. "Just let it go, will ya?"
Meanwhile Elaine was being pulled away by the other guard. "Bye Jerry!" She waved as they reached the door. "See you tomorrow!" For added effect, she winked at George, Jerry and Kramer as they disappeared into the hallway.