Disclaimer: I own nothing. It fails.

A.N.: 'Reditus de Scarabaeus' means 'Return of the Beetle' in Latin. Funny how it sounds better in a different language . . .

Genesis tossed and turned, uncomfortable with sleeping in a bed that was not his. Ever since he had incinerated his own apartment building, he had been forced to stay in the Shinra Building: specifically, the MP barracks.

The Powers That Be either sought to make sure the MPs were uncomfortable or the complaints about lack of funding were actually true.

The SOLDIER flopped over onto his back; there was no chance that he could ever be comfortable enough to sleep on this . . . this pallet. Genesis consigned himself to a long night, and hoped that there were no strenuous activities planned for tomorrow.

Then he heard . . . It.

It was a soft clicking noise, inaudible to a normal human ear, but quite noisy if one had enhanced hearing, like all SOLDIERs did.

Genesis had heard such clicking only once before.

The SOLDIER sat bolt upright to face the source of the noise, but saw nothing; it was dark and there was no movement. He looked all around, but there was absolutely nothing that could have caused the sound.

Genesis dismissed it as his exhausted brain conjuring things, and put his head back down on the pillow.

However, the sound kept repeating in his head…

The next morning, Genesis awoke with a horrible cramp in his backside, and an unexplainable pain emanating from an area just above his shoulder blades. Swearing never to sleep on the accursed mattress again, Genesis limped off to the shower.

When he returned from the shower, feeling a good deal better, he grabbed the folder containing his paperwork off the unfathomably unpleasant bed, and headed off to his shared office with Angeal.

He strutted out of the MP barracks with the folder under his arm, not noticing the strange lump in his paperwork.

Halfway through the day, when Angeal was on lunch break with Zackary Fair, Angeal's pet cadet, Genesis decided it would be a good time to catch up on missed sleep. He yawned, remembering when Angeal had scolded him for nodding off when he was supposed to be working last time. However, he couldn't bring himself to care.

Genesis had just laid his head down on the desk when he heard It again.

Genesis snapped upright, an expression of horror on his face; this couldn't be happening! A wordless scream of despair burst from his lips. What . . . why?

Genesis forced himself to calm down, and think about the matter reasonably. He had killed It, he had seen the entire building burn down around It. It was dead. It couldn't be causing the noise, if It was dead, Genesis reasoned.

. . . But then, if It was dead, what was making the infernal sound?

He heard the clicking again; It was getting closer. He scanned the area frantically, spreading the papers on his desk out and knocking many off in search of It. The pencil sharpener fell off the edge of the desk and flung lead shavings everywhere, but he couldn't care less. It was making even more noise.

Was he going insane? Genesis' heart rate sped up to hummingbird-like proportions. A feeling of hysteria swept over him, and he fought the urge to pound his head against the desk. Goddess, he didn't want to be insane, he wailed mentally.

In the back of his mind, he absently wondered if this was what a nervous breakdown was like.

After a satisfying lunch, consisting of actual food and not the usual Shinra slop, Angeal headed back to his office, expecting to find everything as when he left it.

He was exceptionally surprised, then, to find Genesis' desk in shambles; there were pencil shavings everywhere, and extremely important paperwork was lying shredded on the ground, some of it on Angeal's half of the office.

Angeal suddenly realized something: Genesis was nowhere to be found.

The SOLDIER made his way over to Genesis' desk, looking for a clue as to where Genesis could have gone.

Therefore, he was exceptionally surprised when he found Genesis sprawled face down on the carpet behind his desk.. Inexplicably, a large green beetle sat on his back.

Angeal approached Genesis carefully, not knowing why exactly Genesis appeared to be unconscious. As he neared his comatose friend, Genesis twitched slightly, muttering something about "It", and how "It" came to get him. Whatever "it" was.

Angeal gently picked up the beetle, and placed it onto Genesis' desk, not wanting to accidentally harm it. The beetle made a clicking noise and waggled its abdomen, but did not otherwise resist him.

Absentmindedly, Angeal named it Bob. It seemed to like Genesis' desk and scurried around on the torn paperwork and the fallen pen holder.

Returning to Genesis, Angeal knelt down by his friend's side, and gave him a helpful poke to the ribs.

Genesis bolted upright, screaming something about the mysterious "it" again. He stared at Angeal, a frantic look on his face; he looked positively maddened.

Angeal shot Genesis a concerned stare, and bolted for the exit. Sephiroth needed to hear about this.

The retreating SOLDIER didn't see the two-inch-long green beetle clinging the side of his left combat boot

Sephiroth leaned forwards, an obviously fake expression of interest plastered all over his features. He knew that the news that Genesis had gone insane should concern him, but it didn't. However, he would have to pretend it did, at least until Angeal left.

Finally, Angeal appeared to be wrapping up, and Sephiroth decided it would probably be wise to start nodding agreement right about then.

"-And so, I feel it would be best for you to have a discussion with Genesis yourself," Angeal said.

Sephiroth, lost in his own private reality, simply nodded.

Genesis, quivering with fear, was exceptionally startled when the door to the office burst open with an enormous bang and Angeal's young trainee practically danced in.

The SOLDIER stared at Zack fearfully, and shrank back from the cadet's cheery smile. Zack, not noticing Genesis' less-than-stable state through his undoubtedly sugar-induced haze, pulled the older man to his feet and started to drag him out of the office, babbling some nonsense about how Sephiroth wanted to see him and how Angeal's plants had grown . . .

At the door to the General's office, Zack finally let Genesis go, which caused the older SOLDIER to fall to his knees; Zack could've at least warned him. Standing painfully up, the red-coated man gave Zack a chilling stare; a stare that promised instant death. Hadn't the boy ever heard of respect for his elders?

Zack gaped fearfully at Genesis (and Genesis' death glare), and backed slowly away. After a while, Zack must've felt that he was far enough away to safely turn his back to Genesis; he spun rapidly about and made a strategic retreat.

Genesis gave the teenager's receding back an evil look, straightened his trench-coat, and entered the office.

Sephiroth looked up absentmindedly as Genesis strode into the office, not expecting anything to truly be amiss with him. Genesis had been known to fake illness as a way to attract attention; in fact, he had done so a few days ago, in a futile attempt to procure for himself a decent mattress. Sephiroth had personally made sure that Genesis got no such thing.

However, the legendary SOLDIER was exceptionally surprised when Genesis' eyes suddenly widened in an expression of horror, focussing on a point just to his left. Sephiroth looked down, and found himself staring at a large, iridescent green beetle. The beetle made a loud clicking noise, followed by a strangled sound from Genesis.

Sephiroth looked back up at Genesis, just in time to see the auburn-haired man finish charging up what appeared to be a powerful Tri-Fire.

The silver-haired man barely managed to drop down underneath his desk before the room was filled with a raging inferno.

Genesis stared at the burning wreckage of Sephiroth's once pristine office; almost nothing was left.

However, he had to be sure.

It took him over an hour, but finally he proclaimed the office beetle-free. Smiling in satisfaction, Genesis exited the room, oblivious to the fact that he had just assaulted his superior officer.

Sephiroth regained consciousness underneath the sizzling rubble that used to be his desk. His first thought was that Genesis had persuaded him to go with Genesis to one of the night-clubs that the red-head so loved, but then he remembered what had really happened.

It was only by sheer force of will that Sephiroth restrained himself from shrieking in pure anger; this was the second damage report this week he would have to file with Tuesti!

The general kicked out, shattering the smoking desk above him, freeing himself. Standing up straight and brushing the debris off of his coat, Sephiroth sighed, and headed off to maintenance.

He didn't see the large beetle work itself out from under a lump of molten glass that had been his drinking glass.

A.N.: I so fail. I can't bring myself to kill off the beetle.

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