I’ve lost a mother

I’ve been a mother who has lost a child

This child never even got the chance to live…

This child never gave me the joy of kicking my womb

This child has never touched my skin with its own

This child has never blessed me with its futile cries

This child has never come to me with a boo boo asking me to kiss it

This child has never been acknowleded

Known as a mistake

Mistake…

Mistake……

Mistake….

Ours….

His…

Mines….

You made mama so happy when you were inside of her belly

Trying to grow big and strong

Trying to regain whats yours

People say you arent alive

People say that you don’t matter

You do matter to me

You matter so much to me

Not daddy

Not Auntie

Not anyone else but me

Mama wants you here

Mama wants you in her arms

I want to touch your hair

I want to wipe your tears

Instead I wipe my own

Instead I lay alone

Silent

Insolent words on a screen

They mean nothing to me

You do

Only you

If I had the chance

The opportunity

The…choice

You’d be here in mama’s arms

No matter what the pain

No matter what…

She lay there drying her tear, watching the last of them spill onto the keys of her laptop, Silence surronds her except the sound of the keys

Typing…

Telling the slight story of a mistake…

A mistake?

“A misguided action”

“I never got a chance to love you the way I could have.”

“Chris…its time to go.”

The Brazilian teen stood up and walked over to her lover, his arms wrapped around her as if to offer some sort of comfort. She nuzzles into his shirt, she feels the fabric but inside she feels nothing. She is hollow. Her wings are broken. He cant help her gain them back. In his head he believes that she is fine. Let this be the truth of all males intellect. Yes we are fine… sure we are…we are not fine. We are broken. We are feeble. We are shadows of the women we used to be.

All because of that misguided action

All because of the “mistake” that never got to be.