Hey everyone. So being new to this whol ffnet thing, I may not be particulary smooth but you get the idea. I don't own twilight, Stephen Meyer is genius XD On with it xox

I realise that people may think that my life is perfect. That I don’t have any regrets. From the outside looking in, it would appear so. I have a beautiful wife. A wonderful son. Due to my ambition to become just like my father, I became a surgeon. He inspired me to work hard and I had to focus on my studies to forget everything else.

My family wants for nothing. In these times of war and famine, I am doing outrageously well. It’s absurd that I have the ability to stroll down to the bank and withdraw the salary of a typical American family household. I have it all.

Thinking of all the things that I should be grateful for, it seems wrong to be so unsatisfied. To wish for everything to be different. Yet, despite everything, all I want is her.

Taking a deep breath, I steadied myself. Now was not the time to be lost in memories. I couldn’t be lost anymore then I already was. My son needed me. I needed to pull myself away from my deep aching, otherwise I would drown.

I re-entered my son’s room with a heavy heart. The knowledge that nothing I could do or say was threatening to pull me under. I would try and comfort him, to make the demons go away. Life was cruel; I knew this more than anyone. My demons never ceased to haunt me.

I pushed every thought out of my head as I sat beside him. His eyes were glazed over, his thoughts a million miles away. At times likes these, the ability to read minds would be extremely useful. A bumbling fool like me never knew what to say at the best of times, though people never suspected.

My son continued to look out the window and though he was only seventeen, he looked like a child in his sorrow.

“Tell me what you need son, I’m here for you. Anything you need, I am here.”

He sighed and his eyes fluttered closed. “Anything?” he asked quietly.

“Anything.” I confirmed.

He hesitated. I tried my best to look as encouraging as I could, despite the fact that I felt useless.

“Tell me about… her.”

“Who?” I questioned, genuinely confused.

“Bella,” he whispered.

“At that moment, I knew without a doubt, I was undone.

*Flashback to 23 Years Ago*

I still remember the first day that I saw her. It was just coming to the end of lunch and I was slowly making my way to class. Walking through the halls, self conscious as only a new student could be, the sight of her thawed my slightly aloof persona. She was beautiful, in a completely understated way. In her jeans and scuffed sneakers, she didn’t seem like she was trying too hard like most do on their first day at a new school.

Long brown hair framed delicate features. Her skin was a pale alabaster. An unconventional beauty. I watched in fascination, she seemed too good to be true. This girl couldn’t be real. She was hesitantly stealing glances at everything around her, clutching her books like they were life preservers.

I continued to watch as she tripped over her own feet and books scattered everywhere. A few people snickered and a blush coloured her cheeks. With a sigh she started to gather her things. I knelt down and reached for a book to help.

At that same moment she reached for it and our hands touched. A jolt of electricity passed though us and she gasped. I looked into her eyes and smiled a crooked grin.

“You looked like you could use a hand there,” I said, watching the blush darken. It fascinated me. She fascinated me. “Can I help you?”

I was rewarded with a shy smile. She stuffed her books into her backpack and we both stood up.

“Oh I don’t know, you don’t control gravity do you?” she muttered.

“No, can’t help you there. I can carry you if you’re really desperate.”

A short laugh bubbled from her. The sound made my spirit soar.

“Oh yeah,” she replied. “Depending on how the rest of my day goes, you might have to carry me out of here.”

“That bad huh?”

“Worse,” she said, rolling her eyes.

We both started to make our way down the hall.

“So tell me, how bad is Forks High?”

“Well… firstly my tour guide was incredibly lame. He reminded me of a goldfish, he had a three second memory! He didn’t show me any of the places I needed to know, he just showed me the “cool” places to be.” She shook her head in disbelief. “I had to hide in the girl’s bathroom til he went away.”

I chuckled appreciatively. She was incredibly animated while she spoke and used a lot of hand gestures. I itched to grab her finger tips and kiss them.

“You don’t feel like hiding from me, do you?” I questioned lightly.

“Not at this point of time, no. You’re not very scary.”

“Aren’t I?”

“Nope.”

“I could be holding out on you.”

“Hmmm.” She stopped at a locker and fiddled with the lock.

“Scared now?” I teased, noting the three number combination for later use.

Pulling a few books out of her bag, she crammed her backpack into her locker and shut it.

“Only if you were hiding an insatiable thirst for blood. You’re not gonna drag me into the woods are you?”

“So you’re saying I’m a closet axe murderer?” I asked in amusement as she glanced at her class schedule.

“Close. I theorise that you’re a blood thirsty creature of the undead.”

“How ever did you know?”

“Lucky guess.” She replied dryly. “So Mr Immortal being of the night, care to tell me your name?”

I smirked as she waited expectantly. Strands of hair fell into her eyes and she blew at them impatiently. A hint of frustration showed in her eyes as the strand fell back into place. I reached over and tucked them gently behind her eat.

“My name is,” I said softly looking deeply into her eyes. “…”

“Edward! Yo Edwardo!” a new voice interrupted.

We both turned around and saw a solidly built boy with curly black hair making his way towards us with a silly grin on his face. He saw who I was with and his grin widened. A very shapely but bored blonde trailed behind him.

“Well well well, what have we here? Edward, you’ve found the new girl already? Trust you my man!” he exclaimed loudly as he extended a hand to her. “The names Emmett. Emmett McCarthy.”

I chuckled. Emmett was a lot to handle, but he had a good heart.

“So now you’ve met Emmett. We call him the hulk.”

“Original.” She quipped. “Coz he’s big right?”

“No honey,” he drawled. “It’s because I’m INCREDIBLE!”

“Yeah, incredibly stupid.” Interjected Rosalie, a blonde bombshell dressed in her cheerleader uniform.

Emmett’s face fell. “Well that’s a kick to the balls Rose.” He muttered, crestfallen.

“I’m Rosalie Hale,” she said haughtily, ignoring Emmett’s puppy dog face. “You must be Isabella Swan, the police chief’s daughter.”

“Please, call me Bella.”

“Wow, you’re Charlie’s kid? I thought you lived in Phoenix.” Emmett exclaimed.

“You know Charlie?” she said in surprise.

“Yeah, he goes hunting with me and my Dad sometimes. He’s pretty cool.”

Bella smiled at him in pleasant surprise. Rosalie’s eyes narrowed as she took in the two of them.

“So what brings you to the sticks?” Rosalie asked, hostility evident in her voice.

Bella blinked. Rosalie crossed her arms. Emmett grimaced, he recognised that dark look on his girlfriend’s face. They’d been going out since middle school and Rosalie tended to be very territorial.

“Big city too much for you?” Rosalie continued as Bella fidgeted and looked down.

“Calm down Rosalie,” I muttered in annoyance. Honestly, she thought she was God’s gift to men. “Withdraw claws.”

“Whatever.” She spat unapologetically.

Bella sighed. I frowned at Rosalie who stared back at me unwaveringly. Emmett coughed and put his arm around Rosalie.

“I apologise for Rose’s behaviour, she hasn’t had her meds this morning,” he joked. “She’s a good kid normally.”

Rosalie shrugged his arm off. Obviously she was still shitty. But then again, Rosalie was the epitome of uptight. Bella looked uncomfortable as silence descended.

“So you’re a cheerleader Rosalie?” she said hesitantly, ever the peacemaker. “I bet you’re the captain.”

“Yeah,” she replied, mollified. “Junior varsity.”

Emmett grinned at Bella in gratitude as the bell rang.

‘Well we better run. C’mon Eddie boy, we’ll be late,” Emmet sang out as he pulled Rosalie closer. “Catcha later Bella.”

“Be there in a sec Em,” I replied as he and Rosalie hurried away. I turned to Bella.

“So… they’re nice,” she said softly.

“Rosalie takes a bit of getting used to, but she’s a good person. She’s a loyal friend,” I explained. “Just ignore her crap.”

“Yeah… so we better get to class.”

I nodded, cursing inwardly. Bella looked a bit disappointed too.

“Do you need a ride home?” I questioned.

Bella’s face brightened instantly. She nodded shyly.

I reached out to her and brushed my fingertips against her cheek. Her eyes widened and another blush stained her cheeks.

“Meet you at your locker Bella.” I said as I turned to get to class. I would be very late, but it was worth it. She was worth it.

*End Flashback*

I didn't know what to say, my son had registered me speachless. It was obvious that he had found out the sordid past that his mother had tried so desperately. How much he knew was hard to gage. I could only guess. The real question was if I should tell him my own story. I was damned either way.

Hope you enjoyed that, please review xox