Lesbian

A/N: For whitejenna.
Pairing: None. Remnants and Jenova though.
Fandom: FF7
Prompt:Yazoo/Jenova phone conversation: "Mother, just because I wear trackies and play sports does not make me a lesbian!"
Summery: A silly misunderstanding by mother.
Warnings: Crack.
Disclaimer: Not my characters!

“Hello Mother!”

Loz and Yazoo immediately fell silent. Mother never called this time of the evening, so the issue was not favorable.

“How are you today?”

Loz and Kadaj tilted their heads trying to listen. Yazoo looked concerned, and waited patiently. An odd muffled sound was heard from the phone before Yazoo cradled the phone between his shoulder and his jaw, and paused.

“Kadaj, Mother says to be more careful when you carry her, she is getting nauseated from being jostled so much, and at her age she feels a bit delicate.”

“Sorry Mother! I'll be more careful”

Loz sniggered in glee at Kadaj getting in trouble, while Yazoo continued to speak to their precious mother. After a bit, he paused again, and looked to Loz.

“Mother says that you are far too old to wet the bed, and if you don't stop doing so, she'll take your motorcycle away from you. She also says not to cry, and for you to both take out the trash and help out more.”

“Fine Mama. I'm sorry...”

Loz bit his lower lip to keep from crying.

“Mother also says she loves you both, yes, as much as Sephiroth, and that everything will be fine. She's already picked the next world that we'll go to, and it has a lovely view.”

Loz calmed considerably after that, and he turned to Kadaj to stupidly try and trick him into taking out all the trash himself, although that was quite the exercise in futility. Yazoo was heard in the background, chatting to mother about this, and that, and after a bit, an indignant shriek sounded.

“MOTHER! I AM NOT!”

Oh, whatever this was about, it was going to be good. Kadaj pulled out the popcorn, and Loz handed him a can of soda, and together, the eagerly awaited the show.

“Mother, I am sorry I yelled, but that was completely wrong and inaccurate. Whatever would make you think such a thing?!... What? My what's make me look like a what? Ok, that's what I thought you said. Mother, I love you, but that is absurd! And a bit of athleticism is good for one's health!”

After a bit of silence, and sulking Yazoo spoke again.

“I know you were just concerned Mother, and I understand. I am sure that the fact that you are not from this generation had much to with it, but just because I wear trackies and play sports does not make me a lesbian!”

Oh, the giggle fit that the two brothers had was epic. It was so fun to see the pretty boy nearly ripping his hair out in frustration.

“Fine Mother, I understand, but that is not what offended me. I can't be a lesbian! Don't you mean a faggot or something like that? OH GAWD! Do you really think that?”

He bit his lip, paced a bit, and spoke again.

“I hate to be the one to have to tell you this mother, but I cannot be a lesbian, because I am not a girl.”

Kadaj and Loz were nearly dieing of laughter. One thing was for sure, they'd never let Yazoo live down the fact that his own mother thought he was a lesbian.