|The Next Best Thing
Author: dracosoftie PM
Harry must decide what path to take -- to start a new life or salvage an old one. H/D, with a tiny smidgen of H/G. Warnings for slash, language and explicit sexual content.Rated: Fiction M - English - Angst/Romance - Harry P. & Draco M. - Chapters: 37 - Words: 122,327 - Reviews: 427 - Favs: 456 - Follows: 118 - Updated: 12-12-08 - Published: 10-30-08 - Status: Complete - id: 4626376
|A+ A- Full 3/4 1/2 Expand Tighten|
This story is based on characters and situations created and owned by JK Rowling, various publishers including but not limited to Bloomsbury Books, Scholastic Books and Raincoat Books, and Warner Bros., Inc. No money is being made and no copyright or trademark infringement is intended.
Harry kissed his way down Draco's throat reverently, taking the time to cover every inch of the pale flesh with his lips and tongue. Draco arched and moaned as Harry lightly scraped his teeth over his prominent collarbone, gently biting at the soft flesh beneath it before moving on to caress a small, pink nipple with his tongue.
Draco moaned and Harry sat back on his heels, scrutinizing the blond laid out before him. Watchful green eyes took in the sight of the dusky flush of arousal that covered Draco's nearly hairless chest. He ran his callused hands across the pebbled nipples, smirking at Draco's indrawn breath. Harry continued his slow perusal of his body, ghosting his hands down Draco's sides and over his hips to tangle in the fine blond curls at his groin.
Draco raised his head to watch Harry's progress down his body, his gaze somewhat remote. When Harry bent to take Draco's cock into his mouth, the other man flinched involuntarily before succumbing to the sensation and sinking back onto the pillows. The slight hesitation was not lost on Harry, whose green eyes hardened slightly even as he continued caressing his lover's cock with his tongue and mouth.
Harry released Draco's cock from his mouth, pulling away to rifle through the bedside drawer for a small pot of lubricant. Grey eyes locked onto green as Harry met and held Draco's gaze, dipping his long fingers into the pot and running them down his cock and balls, stopping at his own entrance. A look of distaste fluttered across Draco's face, and he looked away uncomfortably. Harry shut his eyes and opened his mouth to call the whole thing off when firm lips met his unexpectedly. His breath hitched as Draco's tongue eased its way into his mouth and the blond's hand came up to gently caress his balls and squeeze his now-wilting cock.
"Don't stop, Harry," he whispered, running a wet tongue around the shell of Harry's ear. "I want this. I want you."
The reassuring words and gentle caresses revived Harry's flagging erection. As Draco's hand pumped his cock, Harry slipped a finger inside himself, stretching and teasing the tight muscle at his entrance. Their breathing became ragged as Harry finger-fucked himself, and Draco lowered his head and settled his lips around Harry's erection.
"Fuck," Harry said roughly, keening as Draco's talented mouth engulfed him.
Draco's head snapped up, his eyes narrowing as he looked at Harry, contempt nearly rolling off him in waves.
"I believe that was the general idea, wasn't it?" he sneered.
The disdain in the other man's voice would have stopped Harry moments ago, but the dark-haired man was too far gone to care. Wordlessly he motioned for Draco to lie back on the bed. Harry scooped more lubricant out of the pot and coated Draco's erection with it. The blond's eyes closed tightly at the sensation of the cool liquid coating his arousal, his lips twisted into a grimace as though he were fighting some sort of internal battle. He remained stoically silent, not stopping Harry, but doing nothing to encourage him.
Harry straddled Draco and slowly guided his cock into his arse. He had complete control; Draco had gone stock-still underneath him. Harry eased himself down onto the blond's cock, moaning quietly at the sensation of being filled. Draco was panting at the effort of restraining himself, his hands fisting in the duvet underneath them to prevent him from grabbing Harry's hips to guide the other man's movements, eyes still tightly closed.
Harry swallowed the knot that had formed in his throat at the sight of his coldly unresponsive lover. He closed his eyes to hide the slight sheen of unfallen tears as he began to move, slowly at first and then harder as his need for release grew. Draco bit down on his lower lip to keep from crying out. Despite his efforts to remain still, his hips bucked slightly, meeting Harry's thrusts.
Harry cried out as Draco's cock brushed his prostate. He moved faster and harder, driving himself down onto Draco's erection in a merciless rhythm. He brought his hand up to fist his own cock, stroking himself in time with the thrusts.
"Shit!" Harry yelled as he came, his come spilling over his fist and shooting onto Draco's stomach. Draco's own orgasm followed almost immediately, causing the blond's eyes to shoot open in surprise. He came silently, arching up off the bed, his eyes wide as he stared in wonder at Harry.
Neither said anything for a long moment, their gazes locked. Harry broke the spell by rolling to the side, careful to make sure their bodies weren't touching when he settled against the bed.
Harry dropped his sweaty head onto his pillow heavily. He looked over at his thoroughly debauched blond bed partner, his eyes heavy with guilt and shame. Grey eyes flashed at him in defiance.
"This isn't going to work," Harry said gently, wincing at the disbelief that shone through Draco's eyes.
"This isn't going to work?" the deep voice spat angrily. "This isn't going to work? Fuck you, Harry. Oh, wait. I just fucking did."
Harry drew a hand through his thick hair. He had known it was a bad idea from the start. He should have said no; in fact, he had said no. He had said no repeatedly, coming up with dozens of reasons why this encounter was a horrible idea. Every reason had been countered with a different argument, days of fighting leading up to this moment.
His resolve had held until this morning, when he woke to find a pair of soft lips nibbling their way down his stomach. His sleep-muddled brain hadn't registered whose lips they were until they were wrapped around his hardened cock, and by then the jolt of seeing the gorgeous grey eyes above the talented mouth watching him with calm calculation had been too much. He hadn't been able to say no.
But now, as the sweat on their skin cooled and the late morning sunshine cast patterns across the quilt Molly Weasley had made for him and Ginny last Christmas, the impossibility of the situation – the wrongness of it – came crashing down around him.
"That's right, you did. You fucked me. You can't tell me you enjoyed it. That it made you happy. That it was something you wanted to do," Harry said harshly. "I know it wasn't."
Draco's head shook angrily, tears forming in the grey eyes.
"When has this ever been about what I wanted? This is what you wanted. What I had to give you to stop you from making a horrible mistake."
"No!" Harry said forcefully, causing the blond head to snap up to look at him. "No. This was the horrible mistake. This is insane. How could you possibly have thought this would change anything? What kind of life would this be?"
"You know I'm the only one who can make you happy, Harry," the cold voice snarled, bringing dozens of memories of school yard confrontations with the blond searing through Harry's mind. He hadn't heard that tone from Draco's voice in a very long time.
"Merlin, Ginny, I'm so sorry," he said quietly, throwing his feet over the edge of the bed and standing. He walked naked to the armoire, grabbing the first thing he could get his hands on – a green silk shirt he knew Draco loved and a pair of denims.
There wasn't any resolution to this situation that wouldn't hurt someone, Harry thought remorsefully. He honestly couldn't say how he'd landed himself in this situation, torn between his wife and his lover. One thing was for sure, though. It was ending today.
"I'm sorry. I'm so sorry," Harry rasped, his voice barely a whisper as he watched his wife's features begin to ripple into focus as the Polyjuice wore off. Softly mussed blond hair grew into a disheveled nest of red; perfectly pale skin became dotted with light freckles.
"You're going to him, aren't you?" she asked, her voice dripping with accusation.
Harry stilled, the denims he had been pulling on frozen on his hips, unbuttoned. He turned to face her. He owed her that much, after all. She was his wife of five years. The woman he was leaving for his lover, his soul mate, the man he had been cheating on her with for most of their marriage.
"Yes," he said simply.
"I'll never forgive you for this, Harry. If you leave now you won't be welcomed back after you change your mind again," she said bitterly. "I won't let you come back to me if you leave now, Harry, not like last time."
Harry was silent for so long Ginny thought he meant to leave without another word. But as he neared the doorway he paused and gazed at her, his eyes full of sorrow and regret.
"I know, Gin. Neither will he," he said softly.
His last conversation with Draco had been clear. Harry had to choose between the two. Choose between his wife – the sister of his best friend, the daughter of his surrogate parents – and the love of his life, the only person who truly understood him. The man who could make him so angry he lost control of his magic; the man who could make him so aroused he lost control of his mind. He'd left Ginny for him once before, but returned because she had thought she was pregnant. Draco had issued his ultimatum a month later, when Ginny had confessed she wasn't pregnant after all. Two more months of constant fighting with his wife – and the heartbreaking absence of his lover – had come to a head today. He wouldn't be back if he left Ginny; there was no way in hell Draco would let him.
Ginny's eyes took on a slightly mad light. She scrambled up from the bed, clutching the duvet around her slim body.
"Harry. Don't give up on us. Don't give up on this," she said, pleading. "I'll keep taking the potion for as long as you want. Please, Harry. You can keep our life together and still have him that way. It's the next best thing."
Harry shook his head slightly. Ginny, he knew, would never speak to him again. The rest of the Weasleys would eventually forgive him, or they wouldn't. He couldn't deny this part of himself any longer. It wasn't fair to him, nor was it fair to her.
"Oh, Gin," he said sadly. "You deserve to be more than the next best thing."
Harry watched as his beautiful wife slumped back onto the bed, her defeated acceptance of the situation clear as the fight left her eyes. Harry slipped out of the room, sure in his decision. He took a deep breath as he stepped into the hallway to Apparate toward his future. Draco.
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