Six Long Years

Spearofhope

October 28, 2008

Disclaimer: I do not own the Characters of the Silent Hill Franchise Portrayed in this work of Fiction. All rights are reserved by Konami Entertainment.

Summary: Six Years – Six long years have passed. And now the Streets of Shepherds Glen are not as Empty as he had dreamed, and the characters of his past he had seen so vividly slain still walk and stand and smile with the same Grace. But will he ever Find the Grace he lost on Toluca Lake?

I don’t believe in rating stories M but this story is based off an M Rated Video game so what do you expect?

--

I’m sorry Josh….

As I turned and walked away from my deepest demon, a look on my face as blank as my slate, I decided then and there that It was Ok – Not that it had no repercussions, not that it was meaningless or that there were no ill effects, but… well I decided that it wasn’t just going to be ok because it already was. Things were all set up, and I wouldn’t need to worry about anything for a while. I gave Josh the flashlight so he wouldn’t get scared, and I gave him back the ring, so I guess he would be content. I wouldn’t have to get up to take care of anything anytime soon, maybe now I can get some sleep – wait, what? What am I saying? What’s going on? Where am I?

--

Three white lights shone right in my eyes, and I blinked. The light was harsher than you would expect, almost as if I had been sleeping, or I had been in a cave for a while. The tunnels under silent hill hadn’t exactly been Well lit, but… they weren’t that dark… The room itself was poorly lit, and I glanced down. I was restrained, again. Was I having the same damn lucid nightmare? As I looked around, I noticed my head was restrained by some Contraption – the Same leather straps on my arms were wrapped around my head, and I could barely move. I breathed out sharply as I struggled with the Straps, but it was no use, and my head fell back against the surface beneath me. As my head rolled back, I looked straight up, and saw an atrium roof with a large Skylight, and at the head of this stretcher, a man, or rather an orderly, who looked down on me. A deep sense of Dread formed in my stomach, and I cried out, asking what was going on, where Josh was. For once, he seemed confused, almost frightened. He looked over, and I knew there was someone else in the room.

“It’s not working…” said a voice to my left, that I felt that I should recognize. It sounded familiary, but very faintly, and I searched my memory for my ordeal in my hometown, and tried to remember my Grim homecoming. Nothing came up, except for the dim feeling of holding tightly onto something metal… and the smell of fresh dirt… and blood. Lots of blood, paired with an excruciating headache and the faraway sound of an air raid siren - esque Screech. I could barely grasp onto these few sensations as a dread realization dawned. My brows furrowed as I called out, louder “I didn’t Go anywhere?” My voice cracked at the end of the sentence, and I knew there was no point in asking. The voice to my Left answered anyways.

“No Alex! And you Won’t be going Anywhere until you can start to Accept Reality AND responsibility!” the man said, as if personally angry with me. Again I wondered how I got here, and I remembered the distant noise of water behind the door of Room 206 in my recurring dream. I thought about where I was and what my father had told me when we ‘spoke’. “No… Please don’t!” I pleaded as the orderly brought two electric conduits down towards the harness on my head. Too many thoughts and questions flooded my head and I worried it might explode. “NO!” I screamed, the noises of my own voice and the machine blurring as my vision skipped and I heard to faraway sound of an air raid Siren. “Josh!” I tried to scream but failed, foam filling my mouth as electricity coursed through my body.

No… no, he’s ok, right? Right? God… No… No, I-I can save him. I can… I can save him, I can save him! He’s ok….

Alex Shepherd stepped out onto the running board of Adam Shepherds truck and dropped down to the pavement beneath, rubbing the back of his head slowly, trying to get used to the unfamiliar feeling of a shaved head, courtesy of numerous electroshock treatments. He glanced around the front yard, half expecting to see that outside the trucks confined area was a much more surreal work, and a tear nearly came to his eye as he saw a sunset of red and Gold at the end of his vision along the road he lived on, not hampered by a deep and deadly fog, and his heart seemed to burst at the sight of the houses lining the road for miles down, the Road smooth and uniform, and as he walked towards the door of his old home he smiled – There was no barbed wire on the door. That was victory in and of itself. Alex slowed, and the relief came bittersweet – he simply had to stop thinking like that. His ordeal was an illusion, a fantasy. And to simply react to its lack of presence is giving to much strength to his problems. Although having been discharged from Alchemilla hospital this morning, he still had a lot to work through.

His father walked a meter and a half behind and to the left of him, Silent. That was how he’d been much of the day – Meeting with the Chief of Medicine at Alchemilla for the Discharge of one of their longest patients, he had been silent, his face practically blank. Driving around Toluca lake to Shepherds Glen, he had been Silent. And now, his face as cold as stone, he was in the process of welcoming his only son back to his home. Just hours Earlier, Adam Shepherd’s face was blank as he harshly scribbled his name on the paperwork releasing Alex from Alchemilla’s Charge, each harsh stroke causing Alex to jump slightly in his chair. The only time even his face changed was when Alex collected his things from his room and he saw his old dogtags around the younger shepherd’s neck. But now his face was Stoic, more stoic than His mother’s face had always been, that cold careless face that even in his fantasy he had been unable to aid. Alex winced, and as he reached for the doorknob, remembered how easily his father found ways to take out his anger. If his father was this cold… then he didn’t even want to know what had become of his mother.

He knew, however, that the slightest of pauses would cause Adam to become impatient, so he opened the door without pause, and gingerly took a few steady steps into the entrance room of his old home. As he rounded the corner and looked into the Family room, his heart skipped a beat. His mother sat rocking in her chair, looking out the windows in the circular inlet of the room. His eyes widened, but he breathed slowly, and he stepped into the room. He opened his mouth, and licked his lips. He breathed in and spoke, “Mom… I’m home.” The emptiness of the room glared back at him as his words glaringly echoed around the room, mocking him. “Mom…” he repeated, stepping forward again, but the woman did not turn. “Lilian.” Adam said firmly, and for the First time Alex heard his voice again. It had changed, Become Grittier. Alex guessed his old man had started Smoking again after he lost his kids. The sudden voice made Alex’s Mother turn, looking at Alex with weary eyes. Her face was still smooth, and youthful, which struck Alex as Odd – after the ordeal they had all been through, both Alex and Adam were significantly affected Physically. Her voice was still soft, and Alex noted she had barely changed – if she had changed at all. But her skin was paler, nearly pure white, as if she had simply been in stasis all that time, shut out from the light.

“Alex?” she asked, and a shiver ran down his spine once again. He looked back to his father for support, guidance… anything, but found the same stone face. He shook his head, not bothering to think in retrospect and turn to his mother again. She turned and faced him, looking him straight in the eyes, and a knot formed in his stomach. He looked down, avoiding her Gaze, and he knew then that he would never be able to return to his life again. He blinked, and wondered why he even wanted to.

That night the newly reunited family had a frozen dinner, With the family beside Alex equally cold. Afterward, with nothing else to do Alex retired to where he would spend the night. He was sleeping in the den at the end of the hall – he wouldn’t dare sleep in his old room – and though the Couch was far from comfortable, it was a wonderful improvement from the Thin-mattress beds of the hospital. As Alex stretched and tried to relax, thoughts kept returning through his mind – of Josh, of Silent Hill, Wheeler, Judge Holloway, but mostly, he thought of Elle. He crossed his arms, shifting to a more comfortable spot. He turned off the TV with a faint smile. Even after all they’d been through, the family still hadn’t bought a new TV set. Darkness filled the room as a dog barked far off, and Alex twisted, his fists clenching. He shook the fright from him, and relaxed again, sleep slowly overtaking him.

In the morning, Alex stretched an old T-shirt over his much bonier frame and Went down the Stairs, the ever present haze he had felt in his nightmares absent with nothing but clear air between him and the well lit room. As he stepped onto the main floor, he looked around into the house and saw his parents in an adjacent room, deadly silent. Alex lifted his hand slightly, and cracked his lips to speak, “I’m…” he paused, his mouth dry, “Going out for a bit.” He said. No reply. “See you.” He tensed, and after a moment of silence went out the door. Anguish reared in Alex’s Chest; he couldn’t imagine his family ever becoming more relaxed about… anything. He could never imagine warmth returning to his home. He breathed out, and looked around. A bus passed him on the street followed by several cars. Far off he could hear car horns and music, and the morning sense of dread left him. He walked to the street and started towards main street, hoping to salvage the day.

Alex smiled as he passed by people on the street, nodding to them slightly, smiling. They stared and whispered, gossiping about the Shepherd boy who came back from the Asylum after killing his brother. The young man paid no heed, and enjoyed every inch of the road as he came up on main street. He bumped into a man exiting the hardware store at the corner, and took a moment to apologize. As the man walked off, grumbling to himself, Alex faintly smiled and stepped into the building, looking down the aisles of tools. The shop owner must’ve died or moved away since Alex had last been here, and a younger man sat behind the counter, quietly reading a magazine. Alex smiled – Although the Old man who owned the shop back in his childhood was half blind, he figured that it would’ve been easier for josh to shoplift from this disinterested character. Alex smile slowly slid from his face as he watched the man turn a page, and he looked down. A thought troubled him as the voice of his father echoed in his mind…

--

“He What?!”

Alex crossed his arms, looking down, The knot in his stomach making his hands shake. His father towered over him although Alex was already a teen and nearly as tall as the man – By Adam’s Presence was as dominating as ever. Adam scowled, and Alex frowned, and considered answering the question. He couldn’t, though, and silent rang in the room. The older man snarled, “What were you thinking?” he asked after a moment. Alex looked down, still not meeting the man’s Gaze, “I don’t know…” he said, but Adam narrowed his eyes, “That’s not an answer, What were you thinking?!” he asked again, practically shouting. Alex opened his mouth a took a shallow breath, speaking again, “I don’t… I guess I just…” he drew a blank, “I tried to stop him…”

Adam frowned, “Look Alex, I don’t want you to EVER let Josh do something like that again, I don’t want you Acting that Stupid again, do you hear me?! He is your responsibility when I’m not around, do you understand?!” he shouted, and Alex nodded, still looking down. “Go to bed.” The Man said, turning and facing the window. Alex stood there silent for a moment, as Adam faced away, “Dad… I’m-“ Adam turned, “Go!” Alex nodded, and looked up for a moment, before leaving the room and going over to his room.

--

“I do love my son, father! I love both my sons…. But I had to make a choice, and the only way to live with that was to make sure my son never loved me…”

At that point, Alex leaned against the wall of the Confession booth, shocked, His legs felt weak, and his head swam, as if he had been struck with a baseball bat. Any doubt he had had up to that point that the man in the booth was not his father were gone, and his mouth went dry.

“I had to make sure he would never feel… Joy… or Compassion… All the things that make life worth living.” The man was clearly on the verge of tears, breaking over the guilt. “You must understand,” he pleaded, “I was only trying to make things easier for him… and for me. And for this selfishness, I ask forgiveness.” At the end of his words, a dread certainty came over the man’s voice, and Alex knew that Adam was truly sorry. The younger man tensed, and a deep, relentless ache in his chest told him to shout in anger at the man’s madness, at everything he’d done to him. But Alex looked down, and breathed out, and knew that that answer would only cause the feeling to grow, and never to die. “If you truly want forgiveness, then you already have it.” Alex said, nodding. He meant it.

--

Now, Alex looked around the hardware store, and that same Ache filled his chest. He narrowed his eyes, and tears softly came to them. His mind was so broken, so starved for attention, that in his loneliest hours he concocted an apology from his father for all the pains inflicted on him. He had needed closure so intensely that he contorted the facts to formulate an entire mad plot giving his father a reason to hate his son. Alex looked down, and a tear fell to the ground as Alex crossed his arms across the black T-shirt, and closed his eyes. Adam Shepherd had ruined Alex’s childhood and Life simply because the man hated him, despised him. Adam Shepherd had doomed Alex to be the black sheep simply because he thought the color suited Alex. Adam Shepherd did not love his son for no reason at all.

Alex opened his eyes and looked down the row of hardware tools and blinked, His eyes widening as they caught sight of something purely evil. A fear stole the ache from his heart, a fear so intense Alex nearly fell to his knees and screamed. Was he losing his mind again? Would he ever be sane? Or even worse... was he still sane? Was it real, was it really here? He turned and ran, not daring to look back at the end of the hardware Isle, not daring to look back at that rack of tools. Not daring to look back to see if the Circular saw still swung from that peg, dripping blood all over the tools beneath it.

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Wow, that was fun to write. I hope you don’t mind the Cliffhanger.