No Beta this chapter - giving them a break for the evening. Please forgive the mistakes!

& I'm so sorry that it took so long for this chapter to get up. I wrote it not once, not twice, but three times, and kept deleting it because I didn't like the results.

But this one I'm satisfied with, so I hope you are too.

Chapter 17: The Party. What could go wrong? ...Hmm.
Have you ever heard the saying, "Don't say how perfect something is, because as soon as you do, that's when things go sour?"

READ SLOW. Important chapter. One of my favorites.

Oh and after the 2nd break in the chapter, I heard Goo Goo Doll's "Iris" playing at the most pivatal Edward/Bella eye-connection, and it seriously shook me up.
The perfect song for this chapter.
NOTE: Bella does drink, and I've done my research. See notes on the bottom for how I made my decision.

Officially rated M. ... And again PLEASE REVIEW!

Disclaimer: Twilight/Characters not mine. I just like to dabble.

For what shall it profit a man,

if he shall gain the whole world, and lose his own soul.

Mark 8:36

Chapter 17: Iris

"Edward!" I shouted, slamming my Chem2 book down on his mattress. "I said no."

"Why not?"

"Because I did! End of discussion!"

"Bella, you're not making any sense, you are aware of this right? Why can't we just t-"

"NO!" I shouted louder, not caring that his family heard me. I'm sure by the lengthy arguement that they are aware something is wrong with us.

"Bella, just li-"

"No." I said lower, crossing my arms over my chest.

Edward climbed off of his bed, his face seeming redder by the second with his anger. I could hear his heartbeat at Charlie's house from here, I'm sure.

"You are being ridiculous right now."

My mouth dropped. "How am I being ridiculous? By wanting to keep you safe?"

"No, that's being stubborn. You're being ridiculous because you won't even hear me out. This is what relationships are all about, compromise."

"No, because this isn't a subject for compromising." I said, walking over toward his window. "So just drop it."

"Where are you going?" He asked, running over to me.

"I'm leaving. I'm not going to stand here and argue with you over something so fooli-"

He cut me off, jerking me toward him. "Wait, don't go! Please, just... We can figure this out."

I pushed him away, not enough to hurt him of course, but enough for him to let go of me. "Edward. Listen to me. You know that I love you more than anything else in this entire world and that I want to be with you forever. But what is wrong with you growing up like a normal human, and me being there with you the whole time? What's wrong with that?"

He was all ready in my face again, his jaw tense in frustration as he pinned me against his bookshelf. "Because it means I get older. Because it means I won't be able to share my life with you the way that you and I are meant to share our lives. And it means I'm going to die. I won't be with you forever, and you'll eventually move on without me..." I could see his lip tremble as he dropped his arms from pinning me and turned around so he wouldn't have to face me.

I swallowed hard, still standing against the bookshelf.

How did we end up here?

We have been doing so well all week long. Spending time with his family, studying, hanging out with Charlie, having fun at school, going to his practices... But tonight, after a conversation with Carlisle and Esme, everything changed.

Carlisle had been talking to us about the family he spent time with last weekend during his lifeline, and how distraught the father was that his wife was laying in bed in dire need of a heart transplant. He was telling us how Joe - that was his name - said when he met his wife, they began by having what they originally thought was a one-night stand, but ended up falling head over heels in love with each other. Four weeks later she found out she was pregnant, six months later they were married, and now, twelve years later, they had three beautiful kids together and had the hallmark card type of life. Carlisle explained that Joe treated Marilyn - the wife - like it was their first date every single day. He'd pick roses for her on Sundays, take her to the same restaurant for their anniversary, said that they were very active in their children's lives... Carlisle said he showed Esme all their pictures they brought at the hospital, and you could see the physical spark in their eyes when they were side by side in a photograph. They had it, and it was all around them.

Carlisle said that when he walked into that hospital room that first night to meet the family and explain the expense of the surgery, his heart broke. Joe had been kneeling on the floor at the foot of her bed, praying with his head down, asking the Lord to take him instead if he must take somebody. He was begging him, saying that their family didn't work if it was broken. He was asking God what he could do to make it right, and begging him to give him any type of sign that things would be okay... Esme said she didn't even know them, but she was so affected by what he was asking that she knelt beside him and prayed with him, placing her hand on his back and crying right along side him. She explained that she could feel the heart breaking of a complete stranger, coarsing from his blood into her palm. She said as she sat there with him for over an hour, letting him get all of it out, she felt like her entire body was ripping at the seams.

That's why they stayed those extra days. After the surgery was a success, Carlisle stuck around until she woke up, and had a long conversation with them. He told Joe that their family was an inspiration to many around the world, because it didn't matter how someone meets, or how long they were together before they became serious... when it's true love, it's instant. Carlisle told us that people are too quick to let it pass them by because they're afraid that it's too sudden, or that it's a casual fling because of the circumstance... and Esme cut in, stating that it broke her heart to think about all those missed opportunities of love because they'd let other people's opinions get in the way of their own happiness...

I pursed my lips, waiting for Edward to turn around. When he didn't, I felt that ache in my chest, the one I had months before meeting him. I didn't like it.

"Edward, I'm sorry. You know that if it were any other way, if there was some way for me to change back, I'd do it in a heartbeat."

He swung his body around, his cheeks flushed, his arms hanging to his sides as he studied my expression in silence.

"But..." I continued with a hard swallow. "I refuse to end your life. You have a family here. One that loves you very much, and I know they're not your biological parents, but they're still your mom and dad."

He nodded, not saying anything. "I understand."

I exhaled, slouching down to the carpet. "Edward, you don't have to be so... like that. I want you to tell me the truth about how you're feeling."

"No, it's fine." he said, sitting in the leather couch by his window. "I get it. I'm not going to force you to do anything you wouldn't want to do."

I studied his expression for a few minutes. "Are you sure you're not upset with me?"

"No, I am upset with you. But I understand your reasons. It's fine."

"...Okay."

%$#%$#%$#%$#

That was the first evening all week that we didn't make love. Instead, we hung out downstairs, playing pool with his siblings until eleven o'clock, and then got ready for the party that I didn't want to go to. Alice chose for me to wear some white hip-huggers, a black tank top, and black shoes. My hair was down and straight, and Rosalie played up my makeup in whites and blacks as she discussed with me how happy she was that I gave her my Cheerleading spot, especially now that she doesn't get along with Ashley Gwinn. She says it's like her birthday every practice when she gets to make fun of her!

Alice chose to wear dark blue leather pants, a white shirt, and she curled her hair into tiny twists. Rosalie chose the shortest blue jean shorts possible, with a cut up tank top, and boots. She pulled it off though, looking like a sex-kitten out of a magazine with her curly hair and bold eyeliner. She said she wanted to make sure Emmett stayed around her the entire time, and she was certain this outfit would do the trick. I almost decided to join her in the skimpy-outfit scandal, since I knew there would be plenty of girls at the party who would be pining for my spot.

We came downstairs to find Emmett sitting on the couch in jeans, a blank shirt and white jacket, Jasper in holey jeans, a Bullet For My Valentine shirt, and Edward in a black long sleeved shirt, longer button down white one under it, with the sleeves pushed up, denim jeans with a tan belt, and a tan jacket over it. His hair was his normal glorious non-attempt-yet-strikingly-perfect fixture, and his crooked smile crossed his face when I came to sit on his lap.

"Thanks for going with me tonight Bella," he replied, rubbing my back. "I know you don't want to go, but I really feel we should make an attempt to be civil, at least."

"It's no problem," I sighed, biting my tongue in frustration.

I was silent during the car ride. We all squeezed in Alice's red car, Jasper and Emmett in the front seat, with Rosalie, Alice, and Edward in the backseat, me on his lap. They were all discussing this past week at school, but all I could think about was how wrong I felt it was for me to be going to this party. Something wasn't settling well in my stomach, more intense with every mile we took toward Julia's house. And as we pulled up to the white, two-story house, my stomach all but fell out of my body. I was trembling as we climbed out, and as Jasper pulled Alice under his arm and she released my hand to walk with him, I felt more sick.

"Edward," I whispered, wrapping both my arms around his waist while he threw his arm over my shoulder to walk beside me. "I'm not feeling too well right now. Something's wrong. This doesn't feel right."

He pressed his lips to the side of my head while we continued to walk up the sidewalk toward the door and the loud music. "We'll just hang out for a few minutes, prove to them that we're willing to settle our differences, than you and I can leave if you're still feeling bad. Is that okay?"

"Yes," I nodded slowly, closing my eyes and holding him tighter.

Jasper left the door open for us as the four of them disappeared into the laughter of students, the hip hop music, and the empty, red plastic cups on the porch. I held my breath as we entered the party, and once the music flashed through our ears as we walked past the speakers by the door, I gripped him tighter. He kept his arm around my shoulders as he greeted a few of his teammates, high-fiving them or giving them nods of silent hellos. Angela turned and waved to me, but Eric wouldn't let her go to walk over by me. I waved back in understanding, refusing to let go of Edward either.

I felt my hands trembling as three girls ran in front of us, laughing as they were being chased by some Senior guys. I could hear their heartbeats coming over the music, and considering how loud the bass was in my ears, that was saying something. I buried my face in Edward's jacket as he twisted us around to meet some more people, and someone gave him a beer, which he began to drink as he rubbed my arms comforting me. I glanced over his shoulder toward Rosalie, who was standing behind Emmett. He had his arms wrapped behind him and around her, with the back of his hands on her butt cheeks, to apparently hide her backside. She had her arms under his, and around to where her hands were clasped together on his stomach, and her head leaning in the middle of his back. She smiled at me, and I returned it, but that was the most comforting I felt.

Something was still wrong.

After about fifteen minutes of conversation, and five more beers he chugged as his teammates carried him on, Edward grabbed my hand, and walking in front of me, pulled me through the sea of people and into the kitchen, where more kids were gathering. There were kids sitting on the counters, kids on the floor, kids at the table, basically anywhere within a two-foot radius. I almost felt claustrophobic as he pulled me toward the keg stand, filling his glass back up. I gripped his fingers tight as I closed my eyes. I wanted to be here, wanted to prove to myself that I could get past all the girl drama. I wanted Edward to have a good, fun, relaxing, human time, to show him there was more to life than just growing old and dying. I tried to force myself to remain calm, but as Julia and Ashley walked into the kitchen from the outside patio, wearing nothing but bikinis, I felt my stomach begin to twist and turn in all the wrong positions.

I tugged on Edward's hand as he drank the beer, and he looked over at his right shoulder to me, inspecting my glance I was giving him. "Are you okay?" he silently mouthed to me, and I shook my head pervantly. "I'm not feeling well," I mouthed back to him, making sure my expression showed my feelings. He nodded slowly to me, pulling me back up against his chest and walking me past the girls, which he gave a hello nod to, and out to the patio, where kids were jumping around in her in-ground pool. He took me to the side of the house, and stopped to rub my arms feriociously.

"What's the matter, Angel?" he asked, dipping his head low to look at me. There was a stint of beer smell coming from his best from the six and a half beers he drank, but it didn't bother me at all that he was drinking, or trying to have a good time.

"Something is wrong," I moaned, crossing my arms over my chest. "I don't feel comfortable here. I don't like it, Edward."

He pulled off his jacket and threw it around my arms as he pulled me into his chest. "I'm sorry love, do you want to go?"

"Yes and no," I replied, in a shrug of defeat. I knew if I said yes, he'd leave in a heartbeat for me. But I didn't want to do that because I didn't want to ruin his night.

"Bella, if you're not feeling well, just tell me and we'll go. No questions asked."

I pulled in my lips as I looked up at him, finding his big green eyes filled with nothing but concern for me and love. "I'm really trying," I whispered, turning my head slightly. "I want you to have a good time."

"I'm not going to have a good time if you're not, Bella."

I sighed. "How about I go home then? I can hang out with Charlie for awhile... I know Emmett said he'd make sure you were safe, so I wouldn't worry about that..."

"No Bella. You're not leaving me, and I'm not leaving you. Ever, do you understand? If one leaves, we both leave."

Jasper came walking outside, holding three cups between his fingers as he strolled toward us. "Hey happy couple," he said, lifting the cups in the air. "Have a drink with me."

I looked at the red cup filled with the nasty beer, then up at Edward.

"She has a stomach ache," Edward said, covering for me. "She's probably not going to drink tonight."

"Designated driver?" Jasper asked.

I shrugged. "Depends on if I stay or not."

"Bella!" I heard a girl screech, as a body came jogging behind Jasper. Julia came twisting around him, wearing her bright blue bikini, her hair flowing over her shoulders like a Sports Illustrated magazine. She leaned in and pulled me to her for a brief hug, then pulled back, taking in my outfit. "Wow, you look sensational! I'm so glad you came tonight! It really means a lot to me!"

"Thanks for inviting us Julia," Edward said as he pulled me away from her gently, and back up against his chest so he could wrap his arms around me. "It means a lot to us too."

"I'm glad," she said, smiling wide. "Now, I'm going to go get us all a shot, and we can take it as an announcement of new friendship! Be right back!"

"Uh, no, that's-"

"Hang on!" she said, cutting him off as she ran inside the house.

Edward looked down at me apologetically, but I shrugged it off, pushing my face into his warm chest, his steady heartbeat surrounding my ears and blocking out the music. Jasper and Edward downed their beers in a few seconds, Jasper winning their little speed bet by about half a second. They laughed, and I felt myself smiling against his body, feeling a little bit calmer.

I think his heartbeat helped.

After a few more minutes of relaxing, Julie came running back out with a few of Edward's teammates from the bar, carrying a tray of red and blue jello-shots. "Now, everyone take one, no questions asked."

Everyone leaned in and grabbed one, including myself. Edward glanced down at me awkwardly, but I just shrugged at him, giving him an expression that said It's okay, it's only one shot.

How much can one shot hurt me? I thought to myself. It's going to be disgusting as hell, but it'll make me look like a team player. Just do it, Bella.

Julia raised her shot cup up in the air, and the rest of us following suit. "Here's to a new friendship with the beautiful Bella Swan, and here's to Fork's High's hottest baseball player in history-"

"Second hottest!" Jasper cut her off, causing everyone to laugh, as Alice ran around and hugged him from behind.

"Okay, okay, second hottest," Julia continued. "Edward Cullen. Cheers!"

"Cheers!" the crowd shouted, chugging the drink back. I held my breath as I stuck the Jell-O shot in my mouth, swallowing it down before I could think twice about it. Edward rubbed my back as everyone began to make funny faces, myself included. It tasted like buring fire mixed with dead road kill that I licked off of the road after it had been sitting there for a few months, and it coursed and floated around through my chest quickly.

"Damn Julia!" Alice shouted, coughing and patting her chest. "What the hell was that?"

"It's called 911," she replied, beaming proud, hands on hips. "It's got six different shots in it. It's enough to fuck you up, let's put it that way."

Edward chugged the rest of his beer, shaking his head as he pulled me back against his chest. "I cannot believe you did that," he whispered in my ear, sending chills through my suddenly relaxed frame.

I smiled, rubbing my face into his right arm. "It's okay. I'm starting to feel better now."

"Are you?"

I nodded, smiling against his shirt. I didn't expect alcohol to affect me, since I didn't have a heartbeat to bounce through my bloodstream. But I what I should have realized is, there's still blood in my body, but no way to release it, which means I'd be on an ultimate rush for a few hours, until that old blood I hunted with and absorbed died down, when I went to hunt again. So I could just hunt after the party, and everything would be normal. Piece of cake.

But as I stood here, laughing with Alice and Jasper, watching Edward and his teammates joking and having fun, I realized that maybe this party wouln't be too bad after all.

Maybe Julia was keeping her end of the bargain.

%$#%$#%$#%$#

It's been over and hour and a half since we arrived here. I'm still on my high from my single shot, almost to the point to where all the lights in my vision seem to double and sharpen, and it's beginning to hurt my eyes a little. Edward and his siblings had consumed about a total of a full liquor cabinet, Edward alone about three shots and eleven beers. He kept saying no, but as his teammates and friends and then their friends, and then those friends's friends pushed him, he caved in and took them. I told him I'd let him know if he started acting weird, but he surprisingly seemed to handle his alcohol well. And I noticed that it made him extremely affectionate. VERY affectionate.

Here we were, in the middle of the living room, surrounded by people, and dancing to Burn Season's "Perfect". The song is pretty slow and sexy, so of course, that gives me an excuse to dance with Edward and show the ladies what I have:.. Him. Normally, I would never dance in front of strangers, but being wrapped up in Edward's arms kind of rips those emotions from you. His warm breath trailing along my cold skin on my neck, his soft fingers trailing lines up my back, his pelvis pressed so far up against me that it's caused my body to have some serious reactions... I felt like life couldn't get much better than this. I raised on my toes to kiss him on the mouth, but right as we connected, I heard people arguing in the kitchen.

I broke away instantly, running toward the voice I recognized as Rosalie. I got in there to find Emmett on one corner, being held back by four guys, with Rosalie on the opposite side, screaming at Ashley Gwinn, and there were three guys holding her back, which was causing Emmett to be pissed since their hands weren't in the most appropriate places. Edward ran in right behind me, holding me back from the arms swinging in the center of the kitchen from both Ashley and Rosalie. Rose's face was completely red and her eyes were wide and angry, and Emmett kept cursing at the guys to take their hands off of her.

Edward stepped in at the wrong time, and Ashley swung at him in attempts to get Rosalie. Of course, this pissed me off, so I went to jump at her, but Edward caught me on his left side, gripping me and pushing me back. "Don't do it!" he shouted, his hands firm on my arms. Rosalie's voice was hoarse for screaming so loud. "You're such a fucking slut, Ashley! What the hell were you thinking, just running up to grab my boyfriend's junk in front of me? Huh? Oh my God, you better pray to Jesus Christ himself that these mother fuckers don't release me because I will knock you on your fucking ass!"

Ashley ran up to her, and got intercepted by Scott, one of the guy's on Edward's team. He almost elbowed Edward in the face as he lunged for her, and Edward was so busy holding me back behind him that he didn't notice.

"I'm the slut?" Ashley shouted back to her, kicking and screaming in Scott's arms. "Me? Take a look around, you fucking skank! These are my friends, this is Julia's party. You're the one who doesn't belong here, in your skanky ass shorts and blonde hair. Emmett doesn't probably even want you, you fat bitch!"

"Oh you keep talking, mother fucker!" Rosalie shouting, her white shirt ripping by the grasps as the boys kept trying to hold her back. "KEEP TALKING! Give me one more reason to knock you the fuck out, because it's going to happen!"

As these two kept shouting, Edward ran over to Emmett to get him to calm down enough so the guys would release him, leaving me holding Alice's hands.

Jasper ran over to Rosalie, picking her up from behind and yanking her away from the three guys that were holding her. "Calm down!" He shouted, jerking her backward. "I understand why you're pissed, but your clothes are fucking ripping, and you're going to end up fucking naked at this party."

Alice and I walked over there to help Jasper, and he ended up having to drag her on her butt to hold her down. Alice ran behind him to talk to her in her ear, while I crouched down in front of her, trying to cover her up with Edward's jacket he gave me moments before this fight broke out.

Julia ran in, holding some guy's hand, and she started freaking out. "What the hell is going on here? What happened, Ashley?"

Ashley pointed to us on the floor, saying "They started it! I got punched in the mother fucking face!"

Now that I glanced up at Ashley, I did notice that Rose got a good punch right below Ashley's left eye, and it was all ready swelling and bruising.

"I should have known!" Julia shouted, running in the middle of their attempts to kill each other. She began shouting over the music, and over everyone else who were screaming at this point.

"I should have known that you had something to do with this!" - and when she said that, she didn't point to Rosalie. She pointed to me. - "Here I was, trying to make friends with you, as requested by Jasper, and this is how you repay me? By starting fights with my best friend? In MY HOUSE? I don't get you, Bella!"

Edward tried to cut in, telling her it wasn't me, but Julia wouldn't listen to him, as she continued to shout. I saw Edward's shirt get ripped as he was struggling to get to me, but I couldn't make out what he was screaming because all I heard was her, and this:

"Why couldn't you just stay where you were? It's clear that you don't belong here! We don't care about how much makeup you stick on your nasty, pale face, or how new your clothes are! Everyone in the halls, for the past four years straight, did nothing but talk about how you were a skank and a whore and a nasty ass bitch who'd never have a boyfriend! That you were nothing in this school! And then you decide to go fuck with Cullen, the best guy we've had at this school, drive his reputation clear into the dirt, and you're still not happy? Wake the fuck up, Bella! You're nothing! You aren't even human! You're a FREAK!"

And that was all it took.

I felt my skin boiling through my chest, and out my ears.

My hands began to tremble.

My chest became covered in my invisible armor.

I saw red.

And then I smelled red.

Then I jumped.

And then I saw black.

The next thing I knew, I was lying on the kitchen floor on my back. There were horrifying screams as people began shuffling around us, running to and from the kitchen. I couldn't make out any of their words. I heard myself hissing and I could smell blood at a really close proximaty. I was being held down on the floor by Edward, Jasper, and Emmett, with my hands restrained above my head and Jasper was sitting on my legs. I couldn't listen to anything they were saying. I saw their mouths moving, but suddenly, it was as if I was deaf.

All I could think about was the heart beats surrounding me from different bodies, and that strange smell of blood still being surrounding me, as if it were right under my nose. I felt my head shaking from left to right in a fast manor, like I was trying to shake off something, and I couldn't stop.

Then I watched as Edward ripped off the remains of his black sweater, bunching it up and lifting my head. I saw his lips moving as he began to cover my mouth and my nose with it, really tight to where a human couldn't breathe as he wrapped it around my head. I still couldn't hear him speaking.

From my peripheral vision, I saw Alice standing beside Rosalie at the corner, with her trembling hands covering her mouth. Rosalie was just stiff, gaping at all of us in shock.

In that instant, everyone else was out of the kitchen, and Edward's voice started echoing into my head. "She's okay! She's okay, it's nothing! Jasper, I swear, it wasn't what you were thinking! We just have to get her up, get her out of here! Now!"

I felt my body being lifted from the ground, and I realized I was in Emmett's strong, wide arms. He grabbed the back of my head, pushing it in his neck, but Edward yelled at him, and he yanked my head back instantly. I couldn't hear what Edward was saying as his voice began to phase in and out, but I noticed that Emmett made sure not to rest my head on his neck now. Instead, he hand his hand on my right cheek, caressing it.

Her ran with me in his arms, and over his left shoulder, I saw Jasper running, carrying Alice in his arms behind us, and Edward with Rose in his arms.

I couldn't remember anything.

"You're okay, Bella!" Emmett shouted as he opened the car door, climbing in with me in his lap.

Everyone else climbed in the car at that second, and we were peeling out, Edward behind the wheel. Jasper and Emmett were in the backseat with me, while Alice sat on Rosalie's lap in the passenger seat.

"She's not breathing!" Jasper shouted, and I noticed his hand was on my chest. "Edward, I'm not even feeling a fucking heartbeat!"

"She's okay!" Edward screamed back to him, jerking the car to a hard right as he pulled onto the highway. I could hear sirens from behind us, but they too began to fade in and out.

"How the fuck is she okay?"

Alice let out a sound of pain from her throat, and from my blurry vision, I watched as she covered her chest. "Oh my God, do you think Julia is all right?"

"Alice! She's fine!"

"There was blood everywhere, Edward!" Rosalie shouted, but my vision became too blurry and I couldn't make out what she was doing.

"Well if you weren't fucking starting shit, none of this would have happened!" Edward countered.

I looked up and saw Emmett breathing really hard through his nose, not saying anything as he continued to stroke my head and hold me securely in his lap. His eyes remained on the front seat only.

"Carlisle's going to get called!" Jasper yelled. "He's the best doctor, he's going to find out about this!"

Edward sped up even faster, plowing through a graveled back road. "I don't care!"

I heard Alice sobbing painfully, and it looked like she was leaning with her head against the front dash.

I watched as Jasper reached his hand to my neck, leaning in closer to me, which caused me to involuntarily tense up into Emmett's chest. "Edward, why does she not have a pulse?"

"She does! You're probably not checking right!"

"Edward! I'm looking right the fuck at her, and she's awake, and in hysterics, and there's no fucking heartbeat!"

Emmett slapped his hand away, covering my neck with his index finger. "It's right here, Jasper! I feel it, so shut up!"

"Where?"

"Right here! She's obviously alive, isn't she?"

I looked up at Emmett, but he wouldn't look back at me. He just kept his hand on my neck, his finger on my nonexistent pulse.

Then the brakes were being slammed, and Alice shuffled out of the passenger seat, throwing up right outside the door. Rosalie ran out after her, followed by Jasper after he lifted up the front seat. I listened as Edward filed out of his side, but as he lifted the seat for Emmett to pass me to him, Emmett refused, shaking his head. "Not now!" he shouted, pulling me into his chest and climbing out. They all began to run inside the house, and we noticed that Carlise and Esme weren't home.

They were probably on their way to Julia's house, for some reason I couldn't understand.

Emmett sat me on the island in the kitchen while Edward and Jasper ran around me. I heard Alice screaming as she cried in the living room, and I noticed Rosalie wasn't in here either.

"Edward, tell me what the fuck just happened, because I'm freaking out right now!"

"Jasper, relax! Bella's fine."

"I'm not just worried about Bella, Edward!"

"Jasper!" Emmett yelled, his voice so harsh it caused me to wince. "You're not helping shit. Get out of here, go check on Alice. Make sure she's alright!"

"Why would she be all right? Did you see what the fu-" Jasper's voice got cut off as Emmett pushed him backward, turning him around and toward Rosalie.

Then Emmett was back over to me, as Edward lifted my head, shaking my face. "Bella, listen to me! Can you hear me?"

I nodded, though my ears were ringing loud, and every time I blinked, I saw red still. His voice began to fade in and out, but most of the time, I could hear it through the echoing ringing.

Edward yanked the piece of sweater from my head, throwing it in the trash. "Emmett, get a washcloth! We have to get this blood off of her face, now!"

Emmett ran around the island, and then a few seconds later, he was back to me. "Did she..." he whispered, as his voice trailed off.

Edward nodded, soaking my face with the cloth.

As soon as he did, I smelled wet blood again.

The scent ruled over everything. I became single-minded. As I blinked once, I realized that I was now flipped over and crouched on top of the counter, my hands touching in front. A loud feral snarl escaped my lips, and it unsettled me. I noticed Emmett on the far wall of the kitchen, and Edward against the sink, both their hands in the air in surrender positions.

Both their faces startled me as they remained unmoving, and after a few minutes of dead silence, I realized that it was me that seemed horrified by them. I was the attacker, they weren't trying to hurt me.

"Bella?"

I snapped my head in Edward's direction, straightening out my pose instantly. His voice was low and calm, but still showed worry.

I didn't want him to be scared of me.

I watched as he slowly lowered his hands and began to come toward me, but Emmett yelled at him, "No! Don't!"

Edward froze in mid-step. "She's okay, Emmett." he breathed hesitantly. "...Bella? Can you hear me?"

I nodded, swallowing hard. My throat was burning to no end, but not for him. Not like that.

"I'm going to take a step cl-"

"No Edward," Emmett said, his voice soft. "Don't."

"Shhh." Edward whispered back to him, as he refocused his eyes on me. "Bella, keep your eyes on me, okay?"

I nodded, not blinking.

I watched as he took a step closer to me, his breathing hitched, his eyes locked. With every small inch he took, I felt my chest become lighter.

"Edward..." Emmett said, his voice hesitating. He didn't trust me

I didn't blame him.

"She's all right, Em." After a few hesitant, slow steps, he reached out for me, his fingertips grazing my pants. The electric current washed over me, relaxing me more.

He saw it, and relaxed himself, exhaling slowly but loudly.

I squat down on the counter, noticing Emmett was still locked in a freeze position to my right, swallowing hard.

As I lowered, Edward's smile was soft as he lifted his hand and stroked my cheek. He curled his fingers to the shape of my face, keeping his eyes locked on mine and no where else.

"...Hey you..." he whispered with a crooked smile. My favorite smile.

I instinctively leaped for him, jumping in his arms and burying my face in his warm neck. Edward didn't even flinch. He wasn't afraid of me. I heard Ememtt's breathing hitch and his body shuffling around in a nervous back and forth motion, as if he could'nt decide to come closer or not, but he didn't say anything.

Edward's hands cradled my head, his fingers tangled in my hair as his heart pounded against my hollow.

"I'm so sorry," I whispered, although I still didn't know what I did.

"Shh, sweet angel. You're okay."

I nodded, gasping for his scent, filling my body up with it to get the burning sensation to go away.

"She's fine, Emmett," Edward said, though I didn't know what Emmett had done or what his expression looked like, my only concern being how comfortable he was making me, and how he had the ability to keep me so calm.

"Can I do something?" Emmett asked after a few more seconds.

Edward lifted me back to the counter, sitting me in front of him so he could stand between my legs. Reluctantly, I pulled away from him, staring into his green eyes intensely.

It felt like my heart was breaking. My chest was beyond heavy, and stiff.

And aching.

"She looks so sad," Emmett whispered, walking over to stand by Edward.

I glanced over at him, and I saw that the big, teddy bear that I adored so much had tears welling up in his eyes as he glanced back up at me. This made me frown worse. Which made a single tear fall from his eyes. I raised up my hand, and Emmett stiffened, but allowed me to cradle his cheek in my palm. As soon as I touched him, he relaxed, but his eyes remained saddened as he covered my tiny hand with his big warm one.

Edward finished inspecting my face and brushing the hair off of my shoulders. He was so calm, even his heart rate was steady.

He seemed so concerned, so occupied with me that it made my stiff heart grow double in size.

He really did love me, even after this.

"Edward, I need to talk with you for a second," Emmett said, not removing my hand. "It's important."

"It can wait."

"Then I'm going to say it here. You've got a gash on your left arm, and I'm worried about... this situation."

I snapped my head back over to Emmett, and he held his breath. Then I glanced back over to Edward.

"She won't hurt me, Em."

I shook my head fast though I still couldn't find my voice. There is no way in hell I'd ever hurt him.

I tilted my head toward his arm, and noticed his gash was a pretty deep cut. I trailed my eyes back to him, my brows furrowed in question of how it happened.

"Your fingernails," he replied hesitantly, his fingers around my neck as his thumbs stroked my jawline. "No biggie."

I started to speak, but as soon as I opened my mouth, I smelled his blood and shut it instantly.

"Emmett, can you please clean it up for me?" Edward asked, his voice velvet smooth. Unphased.

"Yes."

I watched as Emmett cleaned it up, first with water and soap, then peroxide, then alcohol, then multiple bandages, just to be safe.

Then Rosalie stepped hesitantly in the kitchen, standing in the doorframe. "Everything okay?" she whispered, her hands on the wood.

"It's fine, baby. She's okay."

"Good." Rosalie glanced at me, which made that unsteady feeling in my chest come back again. "I called Andy. No one knows where Julia went. They said she-"

"Rose!" Edward said, his voice restrained.

Rosalie backed away, Emmett following her out. They walked down the hall, and I could hardly hear them whispering since my ears were still foggy, but I heard "was running off... screaming... toward the woods... a lot of blood... but no one can find her."

Emmett sighed, and I heard them moving, in what sounded like a hugging motion.

"What is wrong with Bella?" Rosalie sobbed, her voice loud. She sounded like she was concerned... for me.

"Edward and I are going to explain everything to you guys. It's not as bad as you think."

"Did you know something like this could happen?" Rosalie's voice continued to make the ache rise in my chest, and I turned to frown at Edward.

"Yes. I've known for awhile."

"But-"

"Shh, I've got you. Bella's not going to hurt anyone here, I swear. You just have to trust her."

"I do!" she sobbed louder, in a defeat expression. "I love Bella. I'm just worried that they're going to come and get her."

"It won't happen. We won't let them."

"But the poli-"

"I've got it under control, Rose. Don't worry your pretty little head about it, okay?" I listened as she sniffled and he walked her down the hall, back toward the living room.

"I love you," he said.

"I love you."

I inhaled, unable to wipe the worst, saddest expression on my face. This pain felt worse than the day I watched Edward cry in protest, shoving his vein into my vision.

Edward's hands rubbed my thighs in a soothing manner, his eyes remaining calm, like he didn't want to reflect my expression and make me feel worse.

He was being the strong one.

"I messed everything up, didn't I?" My voice was scratchy, a bare whisper.

"No, you didn't."

"Yes. I did." I looked down to my lap, finding my fingers. "... I'm going to lose you now. I just know it."

"Hey, hey, hey!" he shouted, jerking my face toward him. "You're never going to lose me."

"Yes, I am." I swallowed hard, unable to look at him anymore. "It's over."

"It is not." His voice was stern.

"D-Did I..." I bit the inside of my quivering lip. "Did I kill her?"

"No. I got to you quick enough. She just ran off, scared. I think she saw your teeth and it frightened her."

"...But, the blood?"

"You didn't get her, Bella. I promise you."

"But Carlisle?" I cried, shaking my head. "He's going to know. They'll call him."

"I'm going to call him, Bella. Trust me, there were only fifteen people in that kitchen. All plastered, and fighting. Six of my teammates, the two girls, you, me, and my family. We were all intoxicated, I know because I drank with them. Most people didn't even see you in the kitchen, being too focused on Rosalie's attempts to hurt Ashley, not to mention her lack of clothing in that process. They won't even know what happened! By the time they sober up, they'll be trying to figure it out, because it'll only show in phases. Your reaction was so fast, I bet they didn't catch it. We'll clean this up."

That made me feel worse, if possible. When I spoke again, my voice was so light that I could barely make it out. "...You shouldn't have to clean up for me, Edward. Charlie's going to know, and he's going to pull me away from you. I'll never be able to see you again."

"Bella, you're almost a hundred and eight years old." Edward said, his words crashing over me. "I think you're old enough to decide whether you go or stay."

"But I don't think it's safe for you, anymore. I'm not good for you. We were in denial, I think. I could easily snap."

"You love me, remember?"

"Of course, but that-"

"No, stop." He pulled me to him, off the counter. I wrapped my legs and arms around him, shamefully burying my head in his neck. "You said forever, remember Bella?"

"Yes."

"Let me explain how forever applies to us. When stuff gets worse, even the most imaginable, we stick it out. We fight for it. Together... Now I'm fighting for us, Bella. Are you?"

I inhaled his scent, greedily soaking it up. "Y-Yes."

"Then we'll figure this out."

"Okay." Though I didn't know how.

After a few more minutes of hugs and him swaying from side to side with me in his arms, he sat me back on the counter. "I'm going to have to go talk with my brothers and sisters. I need you to stay in here for me, can you do that?"

I nodded.

"I don't want you to leave, Bella. That won't help anyone. Promise me."

I swallowed, nodding again. "I promise."

"Okay."

As he turned to walk away, I grabbed his arm, pulling him back to me. "How did Emmett know?"

He sighed, shaking his head slow. "...I'm sorry, Bella. He sort of... figured parts of it out, with the whole not eating thing and stuff. I'm not sure how he figured it out really, but he asked me a couple weeks back, and I told him the truth. I planned to tell you, but I wanted to discuss my options of becoming like you beforehand, so you'd understand that people in my family accepted you. But we only discussed this today, and I had plans to tell you tonight... But..."

I nodded, taking a breath. "I understand. I'm not angry."

"...You're not?" he raised an eyebrow.

"No. I'm glad you told him. He kept me safe, he protected me. He helped cover for me."

He smiled, giving me a hug. "That's what family does, Bella. They know you're a part of my family, no matter what."

I pulled in my lips, biting down. "I'm so sorry for everything, Edward."

"I know. But please realize that I'm not upset with you. I'm not scared of you, and I still love you with my whole heart."

My lip quivered, as I looked down to his hand I was holding in my lap. "I... I-I love you too."

As he walked out, I felt every ounce of my being ripping apart at the seams. Just his mere distance broke me. I didn't want to be away from him. But I couldn't listen to him tell Alice, Jasper, and Rosalie the truth.

So I pulled myself off of the counter, walking toward the patio outside. But as I glanced back toward the kitchen, I noticed a crumpled piece of paper on the island, where my body had smashed it.

I crinkled my forehead, walking back over to it. I pulled it apart, tilting my head as I read it:

Had to rush out. Emergency. Back in 3-4 days.

Nothing else.

This confused me, as anytime Carlisle and Esme has ever left a note for their family, it had been in Esme's writing, a pretty script. And more detailed, with contact numbers.

Not like this. Maybe it was Carlisle's signature? Maybe it was really important, as stated, an emergency?

Hopefully this was written before the party incident, and they don't know anything about it. It'd make it easier on me... for now.

But suddenly, as I caught a glance of Alice crying as she sat on Edward's lap, with Jasper rubbing her back and hugging her and Edward both... And then Rosalie with tears in her eyes as Emmett held her...

I realized that I just lost the only family I ever had beside my own, but with the same amount of love for them as for Charlie and my mom...

But it's lost now. Because they know who I am. Just like the iris.

So there we go, Chapter 17! Keep the reviews and compliments/suggestions/positive feedback coming in! They are always welcome. Stay tuned!

ANSWERS TO REVIEW QUESTIONS/RESPONSES:

- Thanks to everyone who's continued to be faithful with their reviews per chapter, their positive feedback, advice, and their constructive criticism, etc. It's been amazing and so enjoyable to come home from a long day's work and see the number rise from people who enjoy the story just as much as I do! I can't say it enough: You're the best!

- I've done my research, and according to Yahoo Answers, even Vampires can become intoxicated. Mr. Frosty states: Yes, if anything, the fact that they are a vampire will magnify the effects of intoxicants. A single drop of beer is enough to make their BAC (blood alcohol content) .34, which is enough to kill any human. And according to BellaKay: If the drug messed with the mind, i would think so. Just like it's believed they can be knocked unconscious. And finally, according to Myths: Vampires can become intoxicated by directly ingesting drugs or alcohol or can become intoxicated by drugs or alcohol secondhand (e.g. by drinking from an intoxicated victim) So since I wanted to make a twist like that, I decided to go along with their answers. I realize that some people may disagree with this approach, but by the next chapter, I hope it will make better sense! I hope you understand.

- If you're in the mood for some drama, go check out my latest Edward/Bella fanfic "The Ex Factor", subscribe and review! Rated Mature!

- IF I MISSED SOMEONE'S QUESTION, I TRULY APOLOGIZE, PLEASE LET ME KNOW AND I WILL ANSWER IT ASAP!

Sincerely, Angela.