|A Bunker Thanksgiving
Author: nannygirl PM
Archie and Stephanie prepare for Edith, Gloria, and Joey to come home for Thanksgiving. All is well until a snow storm in Chigaco delays the plane. Will they make it home on time?What'll happend to dinner? And who are the special guest stars?Rated: Fiction K - English - Humor/Family - Chapters: 3 - Words: 19,007 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 1 - Published: 11-23-08 - Status: Complete - id: 4673778
|A+ A- Full 3/4 1/2 Expand Tighten|
Last part! Here we go, hope you've enjoyed it!
BTW I own nothing!
Somehow Stephanie and Barney managed to prevent the fight from happening and now they were all back to preparing for tonight. As the men remained in the kitchen, Stephanie was setting the table. She set what she could but then realized she didn't have enough room so she went over to the kitchen climbing over the TV as she did so.
"We need this table over there." She informed the men.
"Yeah, alright." Archie said looking at the yellow piece of paper.
Stephanie frowned as she looked around not finding the turkey. "Where's the turkey?" she finally asked
"Archie put it in the oven." Barney informed her.
"You really think it'll be ready?" she asked her uncle.
"Huh?" he asked looking up from the paper, "Oh yeah, yeah. I put on there the highest whadaya call degree, and put it in. Sos it'll be ready in no time."
"How long did you put it in for?"
"For as long as it needs, maybe ten, fifteen minutes." Archie said.
"Yeah, and then we can put in the corn bread." Hank said smiling.
No one else smiled though instead they all frowned at him not believe what they had heard.
Archie shook it off, "Never mind youse." He then looked down at his watch, "We've got a few minutes till we gotta go pick up Edith and the kids…"
"And the Jeffersons." Barney, who had his eyes glued to the TV set, reminded him earning himself a drop dead look from Archie.
"Let's see what we've got here." Archie finished as he referred to the scrap of paper. "Now the birds are cookin', then there's the bread from hell…Mash potatoes?"
"We ain't got none." Barney said never moving his eyes.
Archie then scratched out the item. "Cross out the yans too." Stephanie told him.
"Alright, the corn…"
"Is now mush." Stephanie finished for him
Archie blackened another items name, "The there's the stuffing that Harry made Irish style. And since this here is an American holiday, it's out where it belongs in the trash. Barn how the pies?"
"Ready to go Arch."
"And the cranberries?" Archie questioned and Stephanie placed the can of cranberries onto the table.
"Alright, that ain't too bad four outta…the rest of the stuff we had." Archie stated putting the list in his pocket, "Alright now Hank youse go get on that side of the table and help me move it over to the living room and Barney youse move the TV." Archie instructed and the two men began to whine.
"Oh come on Arch!" Barney began, "I'm watching the news. I gotta stay informed."
Archie frowned, "Watching the news." He scoffed, "The only thing your watching is that reporter that don't never wear them bolder holders."
"I don't know Arch, I'm with Barney. It'll be easier if we leave the TV there while we're moving the table." Hank stated. "If we move it, then we're gonna have to move it back to the doorway. This way all we gotta move is the table."
Though as Archie heard his friends speak a frown was worn across his face, it now seemed to have disappeared "Alright we'll do that. Just remember that ol' saying; I break it youse buy the new one."
"Hey look commercial!" Barney exclaimed jumping to his feet as he went to move the television set and Hank grabbed a side of the table. And so they moved the table with not much trouble at all.
"Barn get over here and move that there table." Archie instructed referring to the round table.
Once the dinning room table was moved the kitchen table was placed on the floor. "Alright kiddo, youse keep setting the table and we'll go back to the kitchen."
"Ok." Stephanie said but when the men left to the kitchen she followed right behind. Archie took a few seconds to look at the pies while the chef of them had parked himself back in front of the TV.
"What are youse doing in here I told you to finishing setting the table out there." Archie said.
"I need more silverware." The young girl explained showing the forks in her hands.
"Alright well hurry it up we gotta go pick up Edith…" he looked down at his watch, "now. Come on…" he said getting ready to leave.
"Hey Arch," Hank began, "You and Stephanie go and me and Barney will stay here and keep an eye on the turkey."
"Geeze what a great idea." Archie said sarcastically, obviously that plan had already been thought of.
"I smell something burning." Hank said his nose scrunched up.
"Must be your brain from thinking of that plan of yours." Barney said from his seat causing both himself and Archie to chuckle.
"No I smell it too." Stephanie said using her nose to try and find out where the smell was coming from. "It's coming from…"
"The oven!" they all exclaimed before rushing over to the stove.
Stephanie opened the door and they all huddled around to see what the chickens looked like. After they did they wished they wouldn't have. The chickens that had just minutes a go had been pink and cold was now hot with black patches found all over.
"Geeze talk about fired chicken." Barney said aloud.
"Yeah." Hank agreed, "Hey but I'm sure the Jeffersons will love it."
Archie was not happy with this suggestion, he still wasn't happy about the Jeffersons coming; but he didn't say anything mostly because Stephanie jumped in.
"If you don't get out those chickens out now no one is gonna eat them!"
"Alright, alright." Archie said before grabbing two oven mitts from the counter.
"Say Arch, ain't you gonna need some thicker ones?" Barney questioned
"Nah!" he protested, "I'm a man, women are the ones who use the thicker one on a count of all them chemicals found in their whadaya call hand loprtion. Now move out of the way." He said as he bent down to get the turkey out of the oven. "Geeze…" he groaned once the turkey was in his arms and out of the oven.
So used to having the kitchen table in the center of the kitchen Archie first turned in that direction only to remember where the table was now, to make matter worse he then began to feel the heat seep through the mitts. "Holy cow!" he said before saying a few other curses as he tried to find a place to put the tray.
After failing with the table he turned to the countertop on the right side of the stove, only to be faced with another problem. The pies were resting there along with the dishes that were used to make them. Archie was in too much of a hurry wanting to release his hand from the pain, he swiftly turned to the opposite direction causing the pies to follow him.
"My pies!" Barney exclaimed rushing to the two tin pans that now lay face down on the floor.
Finally the pain was too much, not being able to take it any longer Archie dropped the pan, right into the, luckily empty, sink as he let out another curse. As Archie examined his hands, Barney remained by the pies, Hank tried to figure out what he could do, and Stephanie tried to get her uncle attention.
"Uncle Archie! You dropped a chicken!"
"Alright well," he said moving over to the sink and the other two birds, "youse get that for me while I try to scrub off this here charcall on these two." He instructed her as he grabbed a wire brush and began to run the water.
So there they were Barney trying to salvage the pies, Hank putting the corn bread in the oven, Stephanie grabbing the turkey off the floor with a kitchen towel as Archie scrubbed the other to two in the sink; just then the back door burst open.
"I got the beer…" Harry said each word lower then the last.
Assuming his partner was shocked by the scrubbing and the rest of the mess Archie began to explain. "Put the beer in the icebox and grab a brush…ah geeze." He groaned as he saw what it was that had shocked Harry.
Over by the swinging door was not just the TV, but the people he thought were still on a plane on their way over to New York. Joey who smiled a childlike smile stood by his mother who was fighting back a laugh. George Jefferson stood in the back of the group with a large smile plastered across his face as his wife stood beside Edith both of them with shocked expressions; Edith showing more shock then Louise.
Stephanie, Barney, and Hank looked over to see what it was and their eyes became a bit wider as well. Everyone stood where they were as silence fell over the room with only the sound of the running water and a ding from the egg timer that no one quite knew what it was for.
A few hours later the family was able to have dinner with only a few changes. The chickens had been ruined as the pies, adding to the list of things not present at the table. Instead the only items from their original menu present were the corn bread and cranberry sauce, the rest of the food was in Chinese cartons. Though it didn't seem to bother most of them; the kids were laughing and the adults were caching up.
Archie looked across the table to watch his wife listen to one of Barney's jokes. Feeling her husbands eyes on her she looked over at him and gave a small smile, he smiled a small smile back.
"So Archie how's the bar going?" Louise asked tearing his attention away from Edith.
"Huh? Oh the saloon, it's doing good." Archie told her.
"Oh that's good…"
"Yeah, youse know running a saloon is one of the best business that brings in the money."
"Oh I guess that's true." Louise began, "After all there's always people celebrating something."
"Oh yeah sure, them people bring in money; but the big bucks are brought in from the depressed folks."
Louise's smile dropped. "Oh?"
"Hey Harry," Archie called across the table, "wha was the name of the loser who was in the saloon the other night? The one that wouldn't leave."
It didn't take long for Harry to realize who he was talking about "Oh yeah, yeah the boozer!" he exclaimed, "Yeah I remember him." He went on to tell the story. "Some guy came in the other night, depressed cause things wasn't going his way. His wife left him, his daughter was getting married, and something about his job. Anyways this guy wanted to kill himself."
A few gasps could be heard.
"Oh no." Louise breathed and Archie noticed
"Ah, don't worry there Louise. He didn't do it." He reassured her
"Yeah he got so drunk he forgot his name!" Barney threw in.
"Well that's….good…" Louise said not sure of what else to say.
"Oh, but the customers ain't all…"Edith struggle to remember what term Harry had used, "brosers. The bar is doing so good Archie was able to send us five hundred dollars last week."
"Really?" Louise asked interested.
"I could've sent ten hundred." George said to himself, but just loud enough for the two people he sat next to, to hear; those two being Louise and Archie.
"George!" Louise warned, but Archie interrupted her.
"Nah, nah hold it a minute Louise." Archie began, "What are youse saying Jefferson? I ain't making enough money to send over to my family?"
"No. Of course not." George replied, "I'm saying I make more than you." Both Harry and Archie frowned, "But it ain't your fault Bunker, youse just chose an unsafe business."
"What are you talking about?"
"Hold on a minute Weez." George said to his wife and then turned his attention back to his 'enemy'. "Think about it, with a bar you've got people who can get drunk, and get into fights, and get in accidents, your customers could get arrested! All I gotta worry about is the customers getting steamed from the machines, but since my machines are in the back I ain't got that problem!"
Louise placed her head into her hand.
"Sure, them things are true." Archie began getting ready to fire back and his wife could tell.
"Stay outta this Edith." He said before going on with his point, "You could even be making more money then us, but ain't because of no unsafe business. It's all got to do with the symphony card."
Everyone frowned with confusion as they looked at him, "What are youse looking at eat your egg rolls!"
"What symphony card Bunker?!"
"Yeah, yeah. The way it works is we're different colors…"
"Daddy!" Gloria shouted.
"Don't enterupt your father." Archie said never looking at his daughter, "Which ever is closer to the color black is the one who gets the more money, see? Cause black means death, in which they're the whadaya call moreing which means sadness, and the poor are sad. Sos darker people get more money sos they won't be sad or poor."
George frowned. "That's the most ridiculous thing I've ever heard!" he exclaimed, standing up from his seat, "I get more money cause I'm a better business owner!" this did not sit well with Archie; he too stood up from his seat as the two men began to argue and their wives tried to stop them.
Meanwhile the rest sat at the table watching the scene before them.
"Well," Gloria began "I guess Perry Como was right, 'There's no place like home for the holidays.'"
The others laughed some as the enjoyed their dinner and entertainment.
Later that night Archie and Edith were finally alone in their bedroom. Archie was already in bed and under the covers when Edith began to climb in.
"Well the kids are all tucked into their sheets and fast asleep, everyone else is gone, and we're alone." She said wrapping her arms around her husband.
"You got anything else to say Dr. Seuss?"
Edith laughed, "You did a good job with dinner."
Archie with a frown on his forehead looked at her, Edith noticed and so she continued. "Well for it being your first time." She said before kissing his cheek once, quickly but lovingly.
"Yeah, it's a good thing Hop Springs delivers huh?" he asked with a smirk.
Edith nodded before placing another kiss on Archie's cheek. "And you've done such a good job taking care of Stephy." Another quick peck only now on the lips, "And the house looks so clean." Another. "And you've helped us so muchwhile we're in California." She kissed him again.
By this time Archie figured out the pattern, "You know," he said looking at Edith through the corner of his eyes. "I opened the can of the cranberries."
Edith giggled as she recalled seeing the bow of cranberries on the table that was filled with Chinese food; still she kissed him for just a bit longer. They then relaxed in the embrace as Archie wrapped his arm around her.
"You know what I was thinking?" Edith asked smiling shyly.
"Wha?" Archie asked with a smirk playing on his lips.
"Maybe you could do Christmas dinner this year." She said smiling as her husbands face dropped.
Archie looked over at his wife not believing what he'd heard, hoping she was joking but when he saw her smiling he had a feeling she was very serious.
There you go. A bit long huh? I hope you enjoyed it. I felt bad about not having Mike there, but I hope George and Louise being there helped making up for it. And though they may have come out in this story it may not be the last one they appear in. Who knows. Hope you liked! Please let me know what you thought! Thanks for reading! Take Care! Happy Holidays! Bye!