Roads Travelled

Part 1 - Road of Innocence

DISCLAIMER
Buffy the Vampire Slayer belongs to Joss Whedon, and Harry Potter to J.K. Rowling. No money is being made from this story which is purely written for mine, and others, entertainment.

EPISODE RATING
PG-13 (T).

TIMELINE
Post BTVS season 2, and during the marauders last year at Hogwarts.

STORY SUMMARY
BTVS/HP crossover. Life had never been kind to Buffy Summers, and she thought she had earned a break. Boy, was she wrong. Stuck in another dimension, with no way back, Buffy must learn to leave her past behind her, and look to the future: New friends, new enemies and new relationships are just the beginning of what will prove to be the longest journey and perhaps the biggest trial of her life.

CENTRAL PAIRING
Buffy/Remus

OTHER PAIRINGS
James/Lily, Sirius/OC, Peter/OC

PREVIOUSLY ON ROADS TRAVELLED: Dumbledore's theory brought doubt into Buffy and Remus' relationship, and Lily's birthday became a tense affair. For the sixth years, Apparation lessons began.

Episode 23 – Meetings

6 February

“You are cordially invited to the wedding of Petunia Evans and Vernon Dursley, 12 February, 16:00, in Virgin Mary’s Church, Little Whinging, Surrey. Please, bring a guest of your choice. The wedding reception will take place in the bride’s and groom’s new home, on No. 4 Privet Drive. Buffet and wedding cake will be served,” Lily read from the pink and white wedding invitation her owl Selene had arrived with that morning.

“That was kind of Petunia,” James said. “I didn’t think you were on the best of terms.”

“We aren’t,” Lily said dryly, and cleared her throat: “PS. Lily, no funny business! Any partner you bring must be able to behave themselves, or you are not to come at all!”

“That sounds more like her,” James chuckled ruefully.

“Do you think you can behave yourself?” Lily asked, putting her head on his shoulder with a small sigh. “Or do I have to ask Remus? I trust him to do that, but I doubt he would be such a great company, considering the mood he’s been in.” Remus and Buffy were still ignoring each other, not speaking or interacting at all, nor did they spend time with their friends very much, unless they absolutely had to.

“You’re inviting me?” James asked, sounding delighted.

“Well, you are my boyfriend,” Lily huffed, slapping his chest. “Of course I’m inviting you! So what do you say? Can you be a proper gentleman for one day?”

“I can act all stuffy and proper for several if you need me to,” James joked. “Don’t worry. I promise. No funny business.”

10 February

“Hi, Mandy!”

“Oh, hi, Buffy!” Mandy greeted, looking up from her homework. “What’s up?”

“Umm...actually, I was kind of wondering if you know where Sirius is?”

“I think he’s flying with James on the Quidditch Pitch, why?” Mandy asked. “And, are you alright? You’re looking a bit worn out.” She gave the Gryffindor a concerned look.

Buffy smiled weakly. “Oh, you know, I’m...still dealing with me and Remus.”

“What is up with that, by the way?” Mandy wondered. “You two have been avoiding each other for over a week! What was the row on Lily’s birthday about?”

“It’s...nothing,” Buffy dismissed it. “We’ll...get through it, somehow. Someway.”

“So...are you like, broken up?” Mandy bit her lip.

Buffy sighed. “I’m not really sure where Remus and I stand right now. ‘Cause, you know, we haven’t been talking. But, like I said, we’ll fix it. I think. Anyway, I just wanted to know where Sirius was. So, thanks!” She quickly hurried off, and Mandy got the feeling the blonde wanted nothing more than to escape her questions.

“Hey, Sirius!” Buffy waved from the ground, until Sirius noticed her and landed.

“Hey, Buff!” The oldest Black son greeted. “What can I do for you?”

Buffy noticed his smile was a bit stiffer than usual, not as sincere, and nowhere near the usual wide grin that was his trademark. The Slayer couldn’t help but think he was angry at her for something. “Actually, I was hoping you could teach me some stuff.”

Sirius let an eyebrow rise. “Yeah?”

“Yeah...I mean, I’ve heard you’re one of the best in DADA in our year, and what with the war going on, I just feel like I should be trying harder to learn quicker, you know?” Buffy babbled on. “More magic than we learn in class, like actual duelling – I kind of get the feeling the war’s not going to be over when we graduate, and I want to help, and to do that I need learn how to fight. And I know I’m the Slayer, but it’s not the same since the Death Eaters are, you know, human beings – sort of – and fighting them and possibly even having to kill them is not nearly the same. And I’ve never used magic to fight before. So I sort of think I need to start being proactive, you know? Start dealing with the fact that I might have to kill a human being, and I think actually learning how to fight someone alive is a step in accepting that. But you know, you don’t have to help me, I’m sure I can – “

“ – Buffy,” Sirius put his hand against her mouth, effectively stopping her long-winded speech. “You’re rambling.”

Buffy winced. “Sorry. So...will you help me?”

Sirius crossed his arms. “I don’t know...why don’t you ask Remus for help? You know, your boyfriend?” He put special emphasis on the word ‘boyfriend.’

“Yeah...we’re...having some issues,” Buffy admitted. “And I was thinking of asking James, but he’s been all sorts of crazy since he got the invitation to Lily’s sister’s wedding.”

“Hmm... Normally, I wouldn’t even hesitate to help,” Sirius said. “But...whatever you’ve said to Remus...he’s not the same. I mean, he’s always been a little on the broody side – “

Buffy laughed weakly. “Yeah. It’s a thing. I like them broody,” she added, hoping Sirius would drop the subject of Remus and her.

“ – but this last week, he’s been downright depressed,” Sirius finished, giving Buffy a look telling her he wasn’t going to let it go. “And I can’t help but feel that’s your fault.”

Buffy’s shoulders slumped. “It’s no one’s fault,” she said tiredly. “We just found something out that’s throwing our relationship for a loop, and we needed some time apart to deal with that.”

“So...this phase where you two walk in the other direction when you see each other in the corridors, avoid talking to each other, and are generally unhappy...it’s just temporary?” Sirius clarified.

“I hope so,” Buffy divulged. “But...” She bit her lip. “I don’t know. For me, I think I just need some time to digest that destiny’s always going to jerk my chain – don’t ask,” she added when she saw Sirius’ curious look, “but I think after that, I’m going to be okay. In fact, I’m halfway there. I’d like to think that Remus just needs some time as well, and that after that, we’ll be back to normal. But I can only speak for myself.”

Sirius nodded slowly. “Alright...well, I have no idea what the thing between you is about, but...for what it’s worth; I hope you work it out. Remus has never been happier than when he’s with you,” he confessed.

Buffy smiled. “Yeah...likewise, I think.” True, when she’d been with Angel, she’d been deliriously happy, but there had always been that shadow hanging over them, that knowledge in the back of her head that stubbornly persisted in saying ‘in the long run, it won’t work out.’ And it hadn’t, even though the ‘long run’ had ended up being a lot shorter than she expected.

With Remus, it was different. She wasn’t the star-struck teenage girl anymore. She didn’t have any illusions of their relationship being more than it was, or that it was perfect – because it wasn’t. They had their fair share of troubles as this latest obstacle witnessed, but what relationship didn’t?

With Angel, it had been too perfect, like nothing could go wrong – until it all went to Hell, and she didn’t know how to deal with it. She avoided all and any possible conflicts with him, because she didn’t want to take the chance that the illusion could end. And Angel let her. And when it did, after she’d been forced to kill him, she’d chosen to run away.

Remus didn’t let her run away, however. He didn’t back down from an opinion (even if the opinion sometimes was stupid, like being ashamed of being a werewolf, as Buffy had experienced in the beginning of their relationship), didn’t automatically let her have her way because he was afraid of hurting her feelings. Angel had sometimes been that way, treating her like something fragile, that could break at anytime, and she had let him.

But Remus forced her to face their problems head on, to acknowledge they had them. And yes, it had lead to this: A confrontation, and then this...pause in their relationship...but at least it was out in the open. There was no chance for it to remain hidden somewhere to fester, and as such, she only had two options – accept it and get over it, or, accept it and break it off. There was no chance of her living a lie by pretending the problem wasn’t there. Maybe it was forcing her to grow up.

“Anyway, back to the point,” Sirius interrupted her thoughts. “To answer your question, yes, I will help you. Room of Requirement, at seven?”

Buffy nodded. “That would be great. Thank you, Sirius.”

“Oi!” James voice came from above, and Sirius and Buffy looked up to see the Gryffindor Quidditch Captain doing loops in the air on his broom. “Padfoot! Are you coming back up, or have you become stuck down there?”

“I’ll see you later,” Buffy said, waving at the two, before heading inside, glad to be out of the cold (she still wasn’t quite able to get the hang of putting warming charms on herself – last time she’d tried, in an attempt to heat up her toes, she’d put her shoes on fire).

“Okay,” Sirius said, walking into the Room of Requirement, ten minutes past seven. “So I thought the first thing I would teach you is the proper duelling stance. Of course, in a battle, your opponent won’t even be thinking of the formal stuff, so I decided not to teach you that at all. It’s ridiculous anyway. So, I decided we’re going to have a mock-battle instead.”

“’Hi, Buffy! Nice to see you, sorry I’m late,’” Buffy said with a wide smile, mimicking Sirius’ voice, and giving him a meaningful look.

Sirius rolled his eyes. “Yeah, yeah, sorry. Are we going to do this, or what?”

Buffy grinned. “Alright. So, shoot.”

“On the count of three,” Sirius nodded, narrowing his eyes. “One – “ and he attacked, a red spell flying in Buffy’s direction. Buffy quickly ducked, only her Slayer reflexes saving her from being stunned, and she went into a forward roll, grabbed Sirius’ legs and brought him down to the floor, hard.

“YEOUCH!” Sirius yelled as his head connected with the floor, which, luckily, had been softened.

“Sorry,” Buffy said unapologetically. “But you cheated.”

Standing up, Sirius glowered at her. “I did not! I was just, in a practical manner, pointing out that your opponent won’t wait for you to be ready, or give you a warning.”

“And, I repeat, you cheated, even if that was the point,” Buffy said smugly.

Sirius pouted, rubbing his head. “Anyway, what was the tackle for?”

Buffy shrugged. “You attacked me, I retaliated,” she explained, not seeing the problem.

Sirius sighed. “Right. Okay, correct me if I’m wrong, but wasn’t the point of you asking for my help to teach you fighting with magic? I can’t do that if you keep using your Slayer techniques! Nothing wrong with incorporating it in a real battle, in fact, it will probably give you an edge, but right here, right now, you’re resorting to what you already know, not what you need to learn. So no more gymnastics, unless it’s in a defensive move, like ducking, alright?”

Buffy gave him a guilty look. “Sorry. Habit. I didn’t really think.”

“No, you reacted, which is good,” Sirius said. “Don’t lose that. Just…put it away, for now. Fighting like a witch must become as natural to you as fighting like the Slayer is if you’re going to be even remotely successful in a magical battle. All you really have going for you right now is your reflexes. A spell can take you down from several feet away. The Death Eaters are not going to let you come close enough to take them down physically, once you lose the element of surprise of you being far from an ordinary girl.”

“I know. It’s just how I’ve been fighting for years, and it’s hard,” Buffy said.

“Well, that’s why I’m here. Let’s try again. Only spells this time, alright? One…”

“Ever thought of becoming a teacher?” Buffy wondered as they exited the room two hours later, and Sirius gave her a horrified look.

“Merlin’s pants, no!”

Buffy laughed. “Just asking.”

Walking back to the common room in companionable silence, Buffy was able to let her thoughts wander. Unsurprisingly, they all surrounded a certain werewolf and their new bond.

Like she’d told Sirius, she was halfway ready to accept it. And now, after unleashing some of her built up anger at the Powers that Be on Sirius (though he’d given as good as he got), she felt a lot more relaxed. The reason she’d been so upset was because she thought this was just another way of destiny coming knocking on her door, of the Powers screwing her over…but now when she’d thought about it for awhile, her newly discovered bond with Remus wasn’t a bad thing. It was her that was making it one.

Dumbledore was right; she should see it as a blessing, not a curse. All her life, destiny had handed her one bad thing after another – being called as a Slayer had screwed her life up. But she’d learnt to accept it. And, it had probably made her a better person, she thought ruefully. She’d been so shallow before, selfish even.

This time, things were different. She’d already been together with Remus when she found out they were meant to be. It wasn’t like they had been bitter enemies and destiny had forced them together, nor had it forced them apart.

Okay, so she still wasn’t sure if her feelings were hers or not – but she was happy. Had been happy before she knew, and all she had to do to be happy again was accept that she and Remus had a destiny together, and it wasn’t necessarily a bad thing. In fact, in a way, it was a confirmation that she had nothing to worry about: She and Remus were going to work. They as a couple were going to work, if she just let it.

She’d loved Remus before, and she still loved him now, and avoiding him was only making her miserable: Making him miserable as well, apparently. So for once, she was going to stop being afraid of all the uncertainties still surrounding their newly found connection. For once, she was going to stop making up excuses – she deserved to be happy, damn it, and for once, she was going to grasp that happiness, come what may in the future. This was now.

Climbing into the portrait hole, Buffy saw Remus sitting in the Marauder’s corner, reading, and slowly, she made her way over. “Hi,” she said, feeling a lot more uncertain.

Remus slowly looked up, and Buffy noticed the dark circles beneath his eyes. “Hi.”

“So…I’ve been thinking about…you know,” Buffy said. “And…I’m…okay now, with everything. I’ve had time to take it all in, and I’ve accepted it. The bond. And I miss you. A lot. So…if you want to…if you’re ready…could we, like, maybe…get back together?” She wrung her hands nervously.

For a long moment, Remus just looked at her. He cleared his throat, standing up. “I’m not,” he said, voice slightly hoarse. “Ready, I mean.” He licked his lips nervously. “So…I guess my answer is…no. I’m sorry.” And he walked away, quickly disappearing up the stairs to the boy’s dormitory, leaving Buffy standing by his chair, half in shock. She angrily wiped away the tears she could feel gathering in the corners of her eyes.

“Oh.” She said to the now empty chair, head lowered. “So…I guess I’ll just…wait, then.”

11 February

Remus stared morosely around himself, where he was standing in the middle of the Quidditch Pitch which was filled with people. Everywhere stood tables, where mass amounts of colourful brochures and pamphlets rested. Behind them sat several witches and wizards, each representing an occupation in the wizarding world.

There were Healers, Aurors, shop-owners, broomstick-manufacturers, lawyers, curse-breakers, ward-designers, rune-masters and Unspeakables. There were potions-masters, journalists, spell-creators, secretaries, authors and researchers. The list went on and on – as far as Remus could tell, not a single occupation was left out.

‘Except occupations for werewolves,’ he thought bitterly to himself, eyeing the stand with Aurors with jealousy. Both James and Sirius were there, of course, talking animatedly with a pleased looking Frank Longbottom and Mad-Eye Moody, who was nodding along to something they said approvingly.

A few tables away stood Samantha, talking with a shop-owner, who seemed to be giving her advice. Behind Samantha, stood Peter, not really interested, but evidently not worried about his own lack of plans.

Buffy had slipped away from the group early on, a commotion by the Healers-stand capturing her attention – though Remus suspected that it had just been an excuse to get away from him – either way, she’d been there since, clearly having found her niche.

Lily had been next, when McGonagall had walked up to her personally, telling the redhead that some people from the Ministry were interested in meeting her, in a mysterious tone of voice. Remus hadn’t seen the redhead even once since then.

Brooding, Remus put his hands in his pockets, wishing he could just leave. But McGonagall had told the students in Gryffindor they had to stay for at least a couple of hours, so she could be certain they were putting in an effort. Like ‘putting in an effort’ would help him. In the end, it wouldn’t matter if he got all O’s on his NEWTs. It wouldn’t matter if he made the people here interested in him and his abilities. As soon as they realised what he was, they’d run for the hills.

Grimacing, he began to walk, glancing at the stands he passed with uninterested eyes. There was Snape, involved in a heated debate with one of the potions-masters, Nick Vandom and Michaela Duncan, discussing something with one of the representatives from the Cleansweep-company involving the safety-mechanisms on their latest broomstick. Everyone in his year had found something that captured their interest.

Everyone but him.

“Hello, there!” A jolly-looking wizard said from one of the stands, capturing Remus’ attention. “Are you interested in a career in the Regulation and Control of Magical Creatures Department within the Ministry? You look like a capable looking fellow! Exactly what we need!”

Remus pursed his lips together, wanting nothing more than tell this guy to stick it, but found himself drifting over to the stand none the less. This was the Department that handled ‘people’ like him. Despite himself, Remus found himself curious about how it worked – he’d only seen the inside of it once – after he’d been bitten, to register.

“What’s your name, son?”

“Remus,” Remus said.

“Remus. That’s…an interesting name,” the Ministry worker said, grinning. “I’m Carl. Ever been interested in taking care of creatures like vampires and werewolves, Remus?”

Remus stiffened slightly. “That depends. What do you mean, ‘taking care of them?’”

“Make sure they’re not a danger to the rest of our society, of course! You know,” Carl said conspiratorially, “our job is really important. It’s up to us to protect the wizarding population from vampires and savage werewolf attacks.” He shuddered. “I’ve been at several such scenes. Not pretty, let me tell you.”

In his pockets, Remus was clenching his hands into fists, his nails piercing into his palms, making them bleed.

“Really,” he got out through gritted teeth, and Carl nodded sadly.

“Indeed. But thanks to our werewolf capture unit, we’ve got things under control. It’s getting more difficult, of course, what with You-Know-Who recruiting them, but what’s a little danger in the name of peace, huh?”

Remus forced up a fake smile, inwardly screaming with rage and pain.

“Thanks to the werewolf registry, we’ve got the names of each and everyone of them,” Carl stated proudly. “We keep an eye on the things from the moment they are bitten, so you can sleep safe at night.” He winked.

“And we’ve got people working on a new legislation, to allow us put some sort of tracking device or identity mark on them, so the people will know when they’re in danger. After all, they look just like us,” he said grimly.

“One of your classmates could be one, and you would never know, until it strikes. Here, take a few pamphlets.” Carl thrust a pile of brochures against Remus’ chest, and Remus took them reluctantly, trying not to puke when he saw the moving front picture: A bleeding, muzzled werewolf in silver chains, surrounded by fierce looking wizards shooting curses at it.

“I hope to see you in our department!” Carl yelled after him, waving as Remus hurried away from the stand, trying to look as though he wasn’t running. The moment he thought he was out of sight, he set off into a sprint, rushing off the Quidditch Pitch, the two hour minimum requirement be damned.

He just had to get away.

He didn’t stop until he reached his dorm-room, where he sank down on the floor against the door, ripping the pamphlets into tiny little pieces, which he then set fire to with his wand, ignoring the smoke and flames which spread across the room thanks to the soft rug on the floor. He just sat there, feeling a strange sense of satisfaction from his burning surroundings.

Only when his eyes teared up, and the fire threatened to burn up the furniture, did he shoot out a wide spray of water with his wand, putting it out. Coughing slightly from the smoke, he opened all the windows, and sank down on his now charred bed, staring at his slightly shaking palms.

When that Ministry Wizard, Carl, had began with his werewolf propaganda, Remus had wanted nothing more than to beat him into a bloody pulp, while yelling that he had no idea what he was talking about.

What use was the werewolf registry, when only the honest and ‘peaceful’ werewolves bothered to register? Remus was willing to bet the only dangerous werewolf they had on it was Fenrir Greyback, and only through his sheer reputation.

What use would ‘tracking devices’ and other such identity marks be, when the only ones who’d allowed themselves be treated and ‘stained’ in that way, would be werewolves like him, lycans who wanted to be human? The truly dangerous ones would still be roaming free…

“Oi, Remus!” The door slammed open and a grinning Sirius Black and James Potter stepped inside. “Where did you disappear off to so quickly? You’re lucky Professor McG didn’t notice! Hey…” Sirius sniffed into the air. “What’s that smell…?”

James stared in shock at the charred furniture and the rug, of which nothing but ashes remained. “What happened in here?” He exclaimed. “Moony?”

“Don’t call me that!” Remus heard himself snap, and he gave James a look of horror. “I-I didn’t mean that, Prongs, I’m sorry,” he mumbled, and to his embarrassment, he found his eyes tearing up again, from another reason than smoke this time.

“Hey, Remus, it’s alright,” James said, walking across the burnt room and sitting down on the bed, wrapping an arm around his friend. “Don’t worry. Did something happen at the Fair? Something that upset you? Tell us. Come on. We’re your friends.” He gave Sirius a helpless look as Remus only shook his head, refusing to meet their eyes.

Sirius walked over, sitting down on Remus’ other side. “It’s fine if you don’t want to talk,” he said, slapping his back. “And don’t worry about the burned furniture and rug. The rug was ugly, anyway, and I think the charred wood gives this room some character it desperately lacks,” he said, trying to cheer him up.

Remus tried to laugh, but only choked slightly on tears that refused to fall. “I-I just realised that I have no hope of a real future,” he said, slightly hysterically. “I already knew, of course, but the Fair made it real in a way it didn’t use to be. Every step towards graduation I take, the closer I get to a life as an outcast. People…creatures like me – whatever it is I’m supposed to be – we don’t belong in ‘normal’ society.”

Sirius and James shared a bleak look. “It was that guy at the Regulation and Control of Magical Creatures table, wasn’t it?” James said knowingly. “We saw he was talking to you. If we’d known he was upsetting you, we would have interrupted and dragged you away from there – “

“ – It doesn’t matter!” Remus exclaimed, eyes flashing. “It doesn’t matter if he upset me or not! I know I shouldn’t care, but I do, because everyone else does! I won’t be able to get a job, ever! I’ll have to rely on my friends and my parents until I’m old and grey, and I don’t want that! I don’t have any outlooks whatsoever. I’m doomed. I was doomed from the moment I was bitten, and truth is, you know it. You just want to pretend it isn’t true, because it’s easier that way.”

To that, James and Sirius had no answer, so they did the only thing they could do. They hugged him, knowing that sometimes, actions were the only thing that helped, that sometimes, the only thing that really meant something where unspoken agreements of loyalty between friends who would be friends until the end of days.

12 February

“Do I look alright?” James asked anxiously, as he nervously tried to flatten his hair – a lost cause before he had even begun.

“You look fine,” Lily soothed, straightening his tie before wrapping an arm around his. “Don’t worry.”

James grimaced, squirming slightly on the spot. “These muggle suits are really tight,” he hissed. “Are you sure I’ve got it put on right? I can barely feel my - eh…never mind,” he blushed.

Lily bit her lower lip, doing her best not giggle at her boyfriend. It was nice, to see this other side of James, with his mask and all pretences dropped, when he was just as inwardly uncomfortable and uncertain of himself and how to act, as every other ‘normal’ human being.

Of course, she didn’t mind the cocky, sarcastic and slightly big-headed side of him either, but this deeper side of him certainly didn’t hurt. She would never have fallen for him otherwise. “I can’t find anything wrong with it,” she comforted, leading him into the white muggle church, nodding to some neighbours and childhood friends as she passed them. “You look very…posh.”

James snorted, fighting the instinct to lower his head bashfully when some of the guests in the church benches turned to stare at him. He was so out of his element in the muggle world… Taking a deep breath, he straightened up and turned a bright smiles and nods to the onlookers, falling back into his role as an upper-class noble with ease.

Really, this was only another social gathering in a way, James thought. He had an image to uphold, after all, even here, away from the Wizarding World. This was just like the many political meetings, parties and arrangements he’d attended with his parents through the years, where he had to make sure to act the way a pure-blood of his standing was expected to. Everything was a game.

If there was one thing that James did well, it was to ‘play the game’ around people of the same or higher rank as himself. This was something he had had to learn from the very moment he was old enough to understand. He was a Potter, and as a Potter he had to present himself to others.

Every slip-up would be noted and discussed behind the scenes, even here. His actions would reflect upon his family, good and bad, and James knew he couldn’t afford show any weaknesses or other mistakes. He was in the company of Lily’s friends and relatives, and since James hoped to one day make Lily his wife (something he’d planned since the first time he asked her out and she turned him down), he better make a good impression.

He led Lily into an empty row, letting her sit down first. Lily waved enthusiastically at some people she saw, and James began a conversation with the man in the row behind theirs. First impressions were everything.

After awhile, the conversation died down and James turned his attention back to Lily, making sure to squeeze her hand and give her a small smile. This earned him a confused look from Lily, which he ignored. He was aware of the eyes following his every move, assessing him, since he was here as Lily’s date, an unknown entity, and people would judge him thereafter.

If there was something Lily had been sure to warn him of, it was that Petunia and her friends and neighbours were all very judgemental people, overly concerned with what was ‘normal’ and proper behaviour. He had promised Lily, and himself, to give her no reason to be ashamed of him. Lily – and everyone else, for that matter - would have nothing to complain about when this day was over, that was for sure.

Lily sat stiffly in her bench, fighting her need to yawn. Would the ceremony never end? She glanced furtively at James, who seemed to have no trouble sitting still, hands clasped in his lap, eyes fixated on the priest, Petunia and Vernon. How did he do it?

Lily had been sure she would have to be the one to stop James from fidgeting, but instead, it was taking her all of her concentration to not do it herself, while he, on the other hand, seemed to have no problem paying attention. It was a pleasant surprise, Lily had to admit, but at the same time, really annoying! She had thought she had James Potter all figured out by now, but he was still an enigma in many ways.

“…I now pronounce you husband and wife. You may kiss the bride.”

Finally, her sister and Vernon Dursley engaged in a very mushy, passionate kiss, hoping no one noticed her sigh of relief. Unfortunately, James did, but he only gave her a knowing look out of the corner of his eyes, making Lily blush.

“It is now my privilege to introduce to you for the first time, Mr. and Mrs. Vernon Dursley!”

They exited the warm church and stood on the gravel covered ground among the rest of the guests. Lily spied her parents a bit to the side of the stairs, upon which Petunia and Vernon stood posing for the camera. They were quite a (horrendous) sight.

“You’re much prettier than the bride,” James whispered, as though he knew what she was thinking. He wrapped an arm around Lily’s waist and she blushed, not really able to dispute his statement, even though she wished she could.

Petunia was wearing a wedding dress in several layers and a low neckline, something that didn’t complement her looks well at all. It was clear the dress had been chosen because of its price-tag, and not because of how it would look on the bride.

She felt bad for Petunia, sometimes. Lily could sympathise with how she felt, with a sister who constantly seemed to overshadow her in everything. That didn’t mean she could understand or easily forgive the way her sister acted most of the time, not only towards her, but even their parents.

Would Petunia ever learn that the road to her own happiness was not about striving to be perfect, but about doing her best in every moment, and being proud and content over what she had and not focus on what she didn’t?

Lily let out a small sigh, putting her head on his shoulder, breathing in the cool February air. “Glad it’s over?” James asked quietly, an amused note in his voice.

“Oh, shut up,” Lily mumbled, knowing none of the other visitors were going to be able to distinguish their conversation in the noise they were making, so she found it safe to bad-mouth the wedding all she wanted. “It must have been the most boring ceremony I’ve ever been to,” she admitted. “I wasn’t expecting much, I suppose, but it was dreadful. It just dragged on and on… I don’t understand how you could act so…indifferent! Tell me your secret,” Lily demanded to know with a wide grin on her face.

James chuckled, placing a kiss on her hair. “I was just as bored as you were, I can assure you. But I promised to behave myself, didn’t I? Besides,” he added, “you wouldn’t believe how many boring Ministry functions and other gatherings I’ve had to attend in the name of being the Potter heir. I’ve gotten used to it.”

The crowd suddenly quieted down, and an air of anticipation fell over the assembled, everyone holding their breath, as Petunia turned her back to her guests and got ready to throw the bouquet. Lily rolled her eyes when she saw practically every woman who wasn't married begin to push others away and wave their arms desperately, as they waited for the flowers to be thrown.

“Want to skip the reception?” She asked James, turning away from the pitiable scene, not completely serious, but not joking either.

Shouts and gasps went through the assembled, and Lily turned back around, assuming the flowers had a new owner, only to get her arms filled with a large bouquet that smelled way too much. Stunned, she could do nothing but gawk and splutter. “But…but! I wasn’t…I didn’t want…” She gave James a helpless look, but her boyfriend could only shrug, an expression of amused pleasure mixed with dread on his face.

“It’s just a myth, don’t worry about it,” he said half-heartedly, patting her shoulder. Lily groaned, turning to look at her family. Her father was openly laughing, though he was also giving James an appraising look. Her mother was holding a hand against her mouth to hide her own mirth, a strange glint in her eyes.

Petunia on the other hand, was giving Lily the evil eye for several seconds, before she quickly forced a smile on her face, nodding to her sister, all in the matter of making a good, ‘normal’ impression. It wouldn’t do to let everyone be aware of the ‘rift’ in the Evans family, after all.

“Blimey,” James muttered to Lily as they entered number four, Privet drive, among the first guests to get there.

“What?” Lily asked, startled.

“The portraits…they’re not moving,” James stated.

Lily giggled. “What did you expect? It is a muggle household, after all. Don’t you take muggle studies?”

“Yes, but it’s one thing to read about it, another to actually see it! It’s weird!”

Lily laughed out loud. “You get used to it. I thought the same thing about moving portraits when I came to Hogwarts for the first time.”

“I guess,” James said, though he still looked doubtful, looking around the house some more. “It’s very…clean,” he said, and Lily grinned.

“Lily! I’m so glad you made it!” Marie Evans, Lily’s mother, exclaimed, coming out of the small kitchen. “And you are…?”

“James Potter at your service, ma’am,” James said, making a slight bow and placing a kiss on Marie’s knuckles. “I can definitely see from were Lily gets her good looks.”

Marie raised a slight eyebrow. “So you’re the infamous James Potter I’ve heard so much about?”

James wasn’t completely able to hide his pleasure over the fact that Lily had talked about him, and Mrs. Evans’ lips twitched in amusement.

She turned to Lily. “I can see how your first impression was that of an egotistical, thick-headed toe-rag,” she said calmly, making James lose his composure and he began to splutter indignantly.

“Yes, well, I’ve come to realise it’s all part of his charm,” Lily deadpanned.

“Indeed,” her mother answered, glancing at James. “Am I right to assume James is here as your boyfriend? When did that happen?”

“Shortly after my visit home,” Lily said. “I’m sorry for my outburst, by the way – “

Her mother waved her apology away. “Don’t worry about it. It was completely understandable. So,” her eyes glinted mischievously, “am I to expect another wedding soon?”

“Eh – “ Lily flushed. “No. I didn’t mean to capture that bouquet you know.”

“Of course you didn’t,” her mother said, smiling, her voice betraying the fact she didn’t buy it for a second.

“Mum!”

“James?” Mrs. Evans asked, “what do you think? Is she lying?”

“I wouldn’t know,” James said smoothly. “I’ve learned not to assume anything when it comes to Lily. It tends to end in throbbing pain.”

Lily looked positively mortified, and even more so when a gaggle of girls, all of whom Lily had gone to school with before Hogwarts, entered and immediately started babbling wildly, making Lily rather flustered as she tried to follow the quick sentences thrown in her direction, an impossible feat:

“Oh. My God! Lily Evans! It certainly wasn’t yesterday!”

“The wedding – wasn’t it just dreamy? I’m so jealous!”

“Speaking of weddings – you little minx! You caught the bouquet!“

“Not to mention that gorgeous fellow you brought with you!”

“Tell us everything!”

Lily threw a helpless look over her shoulder as she was dragged away. ‘Save me,’ her eyes screamed, but James pretended not to notice and only waved at her cheekily in goodbye.

Dinner finally arrived, and Lily slumped down in her seat beside James, having finally escaped the giggling, as her seat was by the honour table, reserved for the closest family and friends. The cake had been cut, and a first toast had been made. Now came the dinner, and of course, the mandatory small-talk that could go in dangerous directions if she – and James, especially, since he wasn’t used to mingling with muggles – weren’t careful.

“Finally escaped?” James asked, giving her an amused look.

“You could have helped me out you know,” Lily muttered, not really angry, but pouting a little anyway.

A large walrus of a man – Vernon’s father – laughed uproariously, taking Lily’s pout the wrong way. “Women!” He rumbled. “Can’t live with them, can’t live without them! Right son?” He clapped Vernon’s back.

“Some of them, yes,” Vernon said rather nervously, steadily avoiding Lily’s eye, clearly not yet over the ‘incident’ last time he’d been in the redhead’s company. “I’m so glad my Pet isn’t the same way. I am so lucky to have her.”

Lily was surprised. Apart from the awful nickname, what he’d just said had been rather diplomatic. Of course, her temporary good impression of the man was quickly ruined by the soppy looks the bride and groom exchanged.

“Oh, Vernon!”

“Personally,” James said, expertly weaving his way into the conversation, “I am of the opinion that women are generally more intelligent than men a lot of the time.”

This earned him bright looks from every female on the table of course, while the men looked more disapproving and rather offended. Of course, they couldn’t openly disagree with him, unless they wanted to face the wrath of their wives. Even Petunia looked fairly impressed.

“I don’t think we’ve met,” one of the women said, Petunia’s maid-of-honour, fluffing up her hair, and straightening in her seat. “I’m Carole. Carole West.”

“Miss West, it is a pleasure to meet you,” James said, inclining his head. “I’m James Potter.”

“So, what makes you think women are smarter than men?” Carole asked, eyes bright.

“History and experience,” James said. “After all, is there not a saying which states that ‘behind every successful man there is a woman?’ And though I am the second in my year, Lily holds the top-spot. I can’t seem to keep up with her, and really, I have no reason to be bothered by that fact. I am proud to have a girlfriend who is both beautiful and intelligent.” He gave Lily a loving look.

He had already learned how the ‘game’ was played in these circles, from listening to the conversations flowing from the guests as they waited for the bride and groom to arrive: Flattery, personal success, subtle bragging, and open displays of affection. It was almost too easy.

“Second in your year? That is impressive. What do you hope to become when you graduate, James,” Mr. Evans asked, changing the conversation to that of subtle digging for information on his youngest daughter’s boyfriend.

“I hope to get accepted into the please force,” James said, unhesitant, clearly ready for this interrogation. Inwardly, Lily winced, hoping no one had noticed James mispronouncing the word police.

“I have many friends and acquaintances in law-enforcement and their work has always fascinated me. Protecting other people is something we should all try to do; in whatever way we are able.” James voice was filled with passion and enthusiasm, and to everyone listening, it was obvious this was something he felt strongly for. It wasn’t just something he was saying to sound good, and Lily could see the approval in her father’s eyes.

“But isn’t such a career terribly dangerous?” Carole gasped.

“I suppose, but in this case, I feel the good far outweighs the risks,” James answered sincerely. “I actually had the pleasure of speaking with a high-ranking official within the anti-terrorist branch of the government,” James continued. “And that made me even more certain that this is the road I’m supposed to take.” He made a theatrical pause before continuing: “Have you ever felt as though there is something you just have to do, like it’s something meant for you and you alone? That’s the way I feel about becoming a please.”

The table was utterly silent for several seconds, before finally, someone, Lily couldn’t tell who, began to nod, and soon, everyone was agreeing loudly, the girls congratulating Lily on such a perfect choice of a boyfriend, and the men now actively including James in their conversations when the subjects changed again, first to the rising crime in their country, then, (somehow) to the importance of drills.

James managed to sound very knowledgeable and diplomatic in every area, and soon, he had, with his charm and with the ease he moved through the different discussions, managed to get the entire table to joke around and speak to each other as though everyone had known each other for ages, and also getting Lily, and by extension, the other girls, to join in the conversation so no one felt left out.

Lily felt the last of her tension disappear. James was performing above expectations, and was clearly able to handle himself. What had she been worried about? The only ones who didn’t look very impressed were Petunia, Vernon and his side of the family, mainly because James was stealing the spotlight.

Luckily, they were unable to say anything spiteful, since it was their wedding, and they would never dare cause a scene at such a large gathering as this. Instead, they had to try and move attention to themselves through the conversations, not managing even half as well as James did. Instead, they only managed to sound rather ignorant, and finally opted to keep their mouths shut completely. All in all, it was a lovely dinner.

“That’s one hell of boy you’ve got yourself there, darling,” her mother whispered conspiratorially. “Don’t let him go for the world.”

“I’m not planning on it,” Lily mumbled, smiling, as she glanced at James, whose current laughter somehow managed to sound heartfelt, even though the joke coming from another of the bridesmaids hadn’t been very funny at all.

When James and Lily apparated to Hogsmeade much later that evening, Lily pulled him into a deep kiss that left them both gasping. “An outstanding performance,” she breathed, wrapping her arms around his neck.

“Thank you,” James mumbled. “Can we hurry up and walk back to Hogwarts now?” He begged. “I really need to get out of this suit. It’s killing me!”

Lily’s laughter could be heard miles away.

Published: 03/11 -09

The Rewrite Of The Rewrite and What Might Have Been

- The scene with Buffy and Sirius weren’t added until much later, but I decided we hadn’t had enough Sirius and Buffy scenes, and I also realised there has been too little focus on the war/Buffy’s Slayer side. Furthermore, it added a little more depth to the Buffy/Remus conflict – before I added those scenes, I had them ignore each other through the entire chapter, without any interaction as well. This works much better, as there is now a smoother passage of time to the acknowledgement of their bond than there used to.
- Remus weren’t comforted by James and Sirius after his meeting with Carl; instead he was brooding on his own. I do think adding the other two improved the scene though, and showed the depth in their friendship really well. I haven’t really written many “serious” Marauder moments, so it was needed.
- Originally, the dinner scene after the wedding was supposed to spiral out of control, James messing everything up, and Lily becoming mad at him, causing a rift that wouldn’t have been resolved for several chapters. But I decided I had so many issues/much angst going on already, and I think the way I wrote it turned out a lot better: It proves James has grown up, and shows how he has been raised as a pureblood and knows how to move and act in these circles…even though he hates it.