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**Special Thanks to Katie [Kwizbit], my loving beta, for understanding why I put this one up without you! I wanted you to be surprised.
Please don't hate me, I love you, and wanted you to have a fun shock too! You're not being replaced or anything, I swear it! ;)
And you're welcome to annoy me and ask me all the questions on AIM later... haha.

Chapter Twenty: Part ONE/TWO.
Night one of the parental visit.

Ohhhhh and the plot thickens.
Esme. Phil. James. Triggers. Jake. Feelings. Confusion. Revelations... Decisions.
Not to mention all the hellacious details that are revealed in this chapter. ;) Sorry for the lack of certain POVs, but no worries, they'll be made up for soon!

This is one of those chapters that you hold your breath when you post... Important AN on the bottom!

Disclaimer: I own nothing that is Twilight or Stephenie Meyer related. But I think she's a genius for creating these two characters that I can play with!

Looking back at me I see that I never really got it right.
I never stopped to think of you.
I'm always wrapped up in things I cannot win.
You are the antidote that gets me by...
Something strong, like a drug that gets me ...high.
What I really meant to say is I'm sorry for the way I am.
I never meant to be so cold to you.

Crossfade, "Cold"

Chapter Twenty: Uncertain Antidotes

BellaPOV

The bedroom seemed emptier. Not as comforting.

Not my new "home" anymore. This place was now foreign.

I remained sitting on the edge of the bed, shaking unsteadily, and placed my head in my hands.

My entire body was trembling, my face was heated, and I couldn't control the sobs escaping through my throat.

My frame was clenched tight, and I was unable to catch my breath.

Opening my swollen eyes, I stared down to the wooden floors, watching tear drops fall and burst as they hit, splattering clear circles along the edges of my jeans.

It hurt so bad... every single thing...

My body, my brain, my stomach, my heart...

The truth, the lies, the fantasies, the ideas...

Everyone, every thing...

It all just... hurt.

My ribs felt like they were going to cut my heart and lungs open. I was wound too tightly in distraught.

The mattress moved a little, and my body grew more achy, as the opposite side of the bed gained more weight. I could hear movement around me, and some more unsteady breathing... and this time, it must be from Edward.

Wiping my right side of my face, I turned to my right, to find Edward, with his head in his hands as well.

His elbows were resting on his knees, and his legs were shaking a mile a minute, bouncing his head up and down between his palms. His eyes were sealed shut, and tears were falling from his face as well.

It made me hurt worse.

Gasping for air, I shut my eyes again, allowing more tears to fall.

...I don't know how long we sat there.

...I can't remember how everything suddenly turned this bad.

One minutes we were flying, as happily as have ever been... and now, we're sitting still, and numb to the world.

My chest caved further, and another sob escaped my throat.

I felt so exhausted of the day, and all of the events that played through.

So many things, so many decisions, so many shocking moments... all crashed into us in the last twenty-four hours.

It just goes to show you, no matter how you roll with the punches... if someone's aiming at your head, they're eventually going to hit you.

And we got hit hard.

Taking a deep breath, I pulled my neck up, staring around the fuzzy, dim room.

Then I turned to face Edward, watching him sit up, through my swollen, red eyes.

He looked at me, and frowned.

It took a few hard swallows before I could even form a word.

And all that could come out, from my thick and raspy throat was a bare weakened whisper of, "...Edward... What are we going to do?"

~~THE PREVIOUS NIGHT~~

EdwardPOV

Seeing four adults walk through the door of the cabin just shattered every thought in my head.

I couldn't even contemplate it.

The first person I saw was my father Carlisle, whom I glared at with all the pissed off expression I could muster. For some one who just called me and told me that you'd be seeing me soon... well this isn't soon, Dad, this is right fucking now.

I wasn't prepared for this shit. It felt like a God damned stampede.

And Carlisle looked like he was ten seconds away from passing out from the breath he was holding.

Inhaling, I spoke, "Hey... mom, dad. Hello Renee and Phil."

Everyone around me was silent, as my mother Esme bounced her eyes from Bella to myself, then back to Bella again.

And that was when I realized, I wasn't even holding Bella's hand anymore.

Stupid, stupid, stupid.

Taking another breath, I stepped back toward her, and gripped her hand tightly.

"Well," my mother said as the same time she exhaled, "hello... everyone."

"Hey," everyone behind me muttered, still not moving.

I swear you could hear fucking crickets outside.

Renee was the first to move, shaking herself out of her own stupor, until she headed toward Bella.

Bella quickly dropped my hand, hugging her mother tightly, "Hey... mom, what are you doing here?"

"I live here, Bella," Renee chuckled, stealing an awkward glance at me.

"I know, but you and Phil aren't supposed to be here until Sunday... you know... after we're all gone."

"I know, but Phil sprained his ankle when we were in Europe, a few days ago, so we came home a few days early, so he could give it a chance to heal privately, before practice starts up again for him."

My parents began hugging everyone around us, saving Bella and I for last.

"Well," Rosalie chuckled, climbing out of her seat to hug her step-mother, "you guys could have called. What if we were all having sex or like an orgy or something?"

"Thank God you weren't," Carlisle said as he gave me a knowing I'm sorry look, pulling me into a brief hug.

I slapped him hard on the back, much more needed for an embrace like this, then muttered, "what the fuck?" in his ear.

He patted me more gently, before releasing me and speaking loudly to not look obvious, "your mother and I took the week off, and Renee called and asked us if we wanted to meet up with them. We're not planning to stay here at the cabin, no worries everyone... They just wanted to gather some of their things out of the bedroom, and then the four of us plan to stay at the Hilton for the remainder of the week."

"Good," Rosalie muttered as Renee gave Jake a big hug.

"Well, Bella," my mother said, giving her a hug, "how are you dear?"

"Good, Esme... thank you," Bella looked up at me, over my mother's shoulder, and I smiled tenderly at her. It's going to be okay.

I watched her suck in some breath and then put on a smile as my mother pulled away from her.

Then Esme turned to me, "come here my handsome man."

I rolled my eyes, giving her a warm hug, "how you been, mom?"

"Good, good, thank you. My goodness you're getting so tall, I can't even hardly get my arms around you anymore!"

I picked her up off the ground, squeezing her tighter, "Yeah, it happens sometimes."

I sat her back down, and she dusted my shirt a little, "I'm going to have to cut down your legs so you're back to my height."

"Please don't," I chuckled, "I may need them one day."

"Just leave his third leg the same height," Emmett teased as he hugged my dad.

I turned and swallowed, looking over to Phil, Bella's step-father.

I hadn't really spoken to him since the break up...

Or more less, since that one particular night after the big break up.

FLASH!~~~

"Bella, please, just talk to me for a moment," I begged, pulling her back away from her bedroom door. "Please?"

"Why?" she said, slapping my hands from her hips, "I have nothing to say to you."

"I know you're upset, but I'm begging you, just hear me out-"

"I don't have to hear you out, Edward," she said, pushing me back, "I've heard you loud and clear."

"Bella, please, keep your voice down," I whispered, pulling her to me by her shirt, "five minues, that's all I'm asking for."

"You'd better get out, Edward. This isn't my dad's house. Phil's bedroom is right next door, and if he hears you, you've got three stories to tumble down, and not just two."

"Bella," I said, exasperated. "I'm sorry... for everything. I don't know how else to say it, but I'm just fucked up, I fucked up, and I am trying to tell you how sorry I am for everything."

She shook her head, glaring at me, "You keep saying you're sorry, but it's not about what you say, Edward... It's what you do. And you cheat on me with Tanya, okay, fine, I got heartbroken. Then you try to talk me back into a relationship, and after such a long time of you begging, I say, 'okay, we're going to give it another shot', because I was missing you too... And then, not even an entire day after that, you say, 'um... Bella, I don't think this is going to work out'... What the fuck, Edward? What do you want me to think here?"

"It's just," I started, shaking my head, "it's everyone around us that's fucking me up. They're comments, they're stares, the rumors, the gossip... It's too much to handle, I couldn't even think straight in class today. I failed my midterm, I couldn't answer questions correctly, I-I-"

"You're going to have to stop pleasing everyone else, Edward, and do what you want to do. You knew this was going to happen when you asked me out again! This is high school!"

"I didn't know it was going to be this bad," I said, shaking my head, "I had no fucking idea!"

"Well..." she scoffed, hands on hips as she backed away from me, "you do now."

I watched as tears fell down her face, but she stubbornly swiped them away, "Just get out, Edward. I don't want you here anymore. I just... I don't want you."

"Bella, please," I whispered, trying to grab her body again, "I know you don't mean that."

"PHIL!" she shouted, slapping my hands back. "Phil, come here! NOW!"

"Bella," I said, shaking my head, "stop, please. Please, just stop, don't get him to come in here."

"Get out, Edward."

"No."

"Get out."

"You're not going to make me get out, Bella. Not til... Not until you talk to me, until we can make this right... Until you can forgive me."

She glowered at me, wiping more tears. Then she shouted on the top of her lungs, "PHIL!! Edward is in my room, he snuck up here, and he won't GET OUT!"

Three seconds later, the door was almost broken off it's hinges, as her step-father came pounding into the bedroom, "Edward Cullen, you better get the hell out of my daughter's room."

I stared at him, trying to hold my ground, "I'm not leaving."

"Like hell you aren't."

"You can't make me leave," I said, glaring over at a crying Bella, as her mother cradled her head, "she and I need to talk."

Before I could react, Phil grabbed me by the back of my neck, and slammed me against the nearest wall, my cheek crushed against some picture of Bella and I from the last homecoming dance, "you need to learn who you're fucking talking to, son. This is my house, and that is my daughter, not your girlfriend any longer, and you will not dictate how she will or will not live her life. Do you got that?"

"Phil! Don't hurt him!" Renee shouted.

Phil eventually loosened his grip on my neck, and I stumbled backward, re-situating my shirt, "she's not even your fucking daughter, Phil. She's Charlie's." Then I turned to look at my ex-girlfriend, in disbelief that she took it this far, the back to the asshole in front of me, "...and Charlie would have never fucking treated me like you just did. Even if Bella and I were having problems."

By the time I realized what had happened, I was laying on the ground, outside their front door. I remembered bits and pieces of trying to talk to Bella, Bella crying and reaching out to me, or to stop Phil, Renee shouting at Phil, and Phil dragging me down the steps and out the front door, not being polite as he tossed me into the grass, head first.

"You're right, Edward, Charlie would never treat you like I do," Phil sneered at me, "but he's not here now. I am... In fact, if he were here, I'm sure he'd say he was very dissapointed in you."

Then he slammed the door, locked it, and called the cops.

And guess who picked my ass up? That's right, Billy Black, Jacob's father and Charlie's best friend. The new Cheif of Police, after Charlie's passing.

That was not a fun car ride back to my house.

~~~FLASH!

Phil was staring back at me, keeping his hands in his pocket. Looking like the dickhead he tries too hard to portray.

I didn't know what to do, but I knew I wasn't going to let him intimidate me.

So I cleared my throat, taking a step toward him. Holding out my hand to him, I gave him a nod, "Phil."

He glared at my hand like it was a pile of shit he was being asked to eat.

Renee hit him hard in the arm, and he finally straightened up his posture, and gripped my hand rather too tightly, "Edward."

I smirked at him, craving the idea to suddenly strip Bella down and fuck her senseless on the glass coffee table right in front of him. Repeatedly. With no glove. Ever. And for an encore, stare at his face while she licks it dry afterward.

Of course, I'd never ever fucking do it, not because it wouldn't be fun -- because seeing his face would be priceless -- but because I'd never disrespect Bella like that.

But fuck. It's the idea that counts.

Besides that, being around him just turns me right back into that fucking asshole I was for the past four and a half years, before Bella came back into my life.

Before I decided I needed to straighten my ass out a bit.

"Okay!" Rosalie shouted, jumping between us, "Daddy, you haven't hugged me yet. And loosen up the grip on Edward, please. His knuckles are white."

Phil did release me, but kept daggers shooting at my forehead.

I smirked cockily at him, standing tall. I'm not seventeen years old anymore, asshole. Push me into the wall now, bitch.

Bella's hand on my back startled me, and snapped me out of my momentary rage.

I turned, curling my arm behind her, and placing my hand on her hip, "hey."

Jake and Emmett brought the dad's some beers, while Renee went to gather some of their things from the bedroom.

We all moved toward the den, and I pulled Bella down on my knee, despite my mother's glances and Phil's disgust.

Bella seemed tense and hyperly stiff as she sat, unable to remove her gaze from Esme.

It made me wonder if she even remembered the fight that Phil and I had, or even realized that Phil obviously hasn't changed his opinion about me either.

"So," Esme said, smiling at me, "may I ask where Tanya is?"

"We killed her," Alice said, as she handed my mother a cup of hot coffee. "Rosalie burned her body, and Jasper buried her behind the house."

"Funny," Phil scoffed, eyeing me down.

I smiled at him, massaging the small of Bella's back. "Tanya's not here anymore, mom. We've parted ways."

"Parted ways?" she asked. "How so?"

"Well, we were never together-together," I explained. "She simply couldn't accept that fact."

"Well after you have sex with a girl for years and years, she's bound to want commitment," Phil interjected.

"Phil," Bella warned, "please."

"Well, it's odd to see you here with... Bella," Esme began again. "What is new with you, my dear?"

"Just work, mainly," Bella tentatively smiled, squeezing my knee tight, "and bills."

"You look very stunning," Carlisle said, smiling warmly at her, "it's amazing to remember you when you were that shy fifteen year old girl who fell out of trees in my back yard."

Bella giggled, shaking her head, "you're never going to let me live that down, are you?"

"Never," my father teased.

"W-Where's Jasper?" Renee asked, looking from Bella and myself.

Bella took a deep breath, glancing over at Alice, "Jasper is sick, mom."

"Sick? How so?" Carlisle asked.

"He's just got a tummy virus," Alice explained, "nothing too serious. I'm sure he'll be fine."

"It's from all the sex him and Alice has been having," Emmett teased.

This confused both Renee and Phil, as they gawked at Bella. "So," Renee teased, shaking her head in confusion, "you and Jasper..."

"Nope," Bella shook her head, "just friends."

"But I thought-" Phil attempted to interject.

"No Phil. We're just friends. In fact... Alice and Jasper hit it off really well."

Alice smiled at Bella, "he's wonderful. Like something out of a dream."

"Fucking cheese-balls," Emmett said, scoffing as he threw away his bottle and handed me and Carlisle another one.

"So..." Renee said, looking toward me, "what's with the... reunion? Are you two a ...couple now?"

Both Bella and myself pulled our lips into tight lines, trying to figure out how to avoid the question completely.

"We-We're, uh,..." Bella stammered, looking down to her hands, bouncing her leg above mine, "um..."

"We're happy," I said, taking a deep breath and smiling at our interrogators, "very happy."

"Hmm," Phil said, nodding his head, "do you think that is a suitable title for our daughter? Just... happy?"

"It's suitable for me," Bella said.

"Edward?" Esme asked, looking over at me with wide eyes, "Answer Phil please."

"Maybe he doesn't feel he has to provide an answer," Rosalie shrugged in defense to me, giving me a warm smile. "Maybe they're just happy... being."

Bella nodded, "we are."

"There's still a lot of things that have gone unanswered," my father countered. "Years of past troubles."

"We're working through them," I said through my teeth, glaring at him pointedly. You know this all ready.

"Yes, well... Forgive me if I seem stunned-"

"We," Phil said, interjecting my mother, "We seem stunned..."

"But," Esme continued, "this is all very shocking. Did any of you know about this?"

All the adults shrugged, except for my father, who could never lie to her. Fucking dick. "Carlisle? Carlisle did you know?"

Carlisle looked at me, while he answered her, "Edward may have told me a couple weeks ago about them coming up here together."

"But they didn't plan this," Alice stated, "it just... happened. Trust us, no one planned for the things that have happened here."

"It doesn't matter," Phil stated, staring at Bella, "what matters is what is going on in the present. This -- you and Edward -- are a shock to us. We, as your parents, have maintained a close friendship, despite the two of your troubles, but this doesn't make your decision to reunite any easier on us."

"No offense," I said, because this interrogation was starting to piss me off, "but we don't owe any of you an explanation. We're not thirteen years old."

"Well you're not acting like your twenty-three, either."

"Excuse me?" I said, tempted to rise off the chase and punch Bella's step-father in his face, "You don't fucking know me."

"Edward, please," Bella said, massaging me leg.

"No, Bella, I'm sorry and I mean no disrespect to anyone else, but you don't fucking know me anymore, Phil."

"By your language... I'd say I still know you pretty well."

"Wait, wait, wait, let's all calm down," Carlisle said, standing up and setting his beer bottle on the table, "Look, Edward. Apologize."

"Fuck that."

"Edward. Now."

I glared at my father, shaking my head. I respected him, but he wasn't about to make commands to me.

"Edward," Esme said, giving me a solemn sad look that about broke my heart, "...please."

Swallowing my pride, I gawked at Phil, "My apologies."

He smirked, shaking his head, muttering, "same Edward Cullen to me."

Same fucking dickhead to me, too.

RosaliePOV

As the interrogation seemed to edge on for hours, my sister and Edward looked more and more like they were on trial.

Clearing my throat, I grabbed Bella's hand, pulled her off Edward's leg, and drug her into the kitchen.

"What are you doing?" she hissed at me, staring back into the den, "Don't make me leave him in there with the sharks!"

"You need to talk to Edward," I glared at her. "Get some level ground. Talk about what's going on, that way you two are more prepared."

"I will," she said, jerking her hand from me, "in due time."

"It is due time, Bella. If you and Edward are going to make a real shot at this, then it's got to happen."

She looked at me, bouncing on her toes, "I... can't."

"You have to."

"Easy for you to say! This is terrifying, Rose. What if I scare him away?"

"Well," I said, looking at the floor, "you and I have to both... you know... first... and then I think you should... tell him. Talk to him."

"Rose," she said, taking a staggard breath, "I can't."

"You need to," I said quietly through my teeth, as Jacob entered the kitchen.

He was wearing only a wife-beater, some dark jeans, and a metallic belt, making sure for me to notice his chiseled features, such as those pecks, those arms, that goatee... dark lashes... Stop it, Rose.

"What do you need to do?" he asked, lighting his cigarette up.

"Nothing," Bella said, jerking the cigarette from his mouth and tossing it in the sink. "Jake, please don't smoke in front of Phil in this house. He'll kill us."

"Please," Jake said, laughing as he lit another cigarette, "Phil love me long time."

"Still," I said, slapping him playfully on the chest and pulling that one from his mouth and tossing it in the sink with the other one, "we don't need to fire anyone up anymore than they all ready are."

"Jesus," he said, holding his hands up in the air, "feisty ass women. I'll go outside. Anyone want to smoke?"

Before he left, he ran his hands along Bella's face in a teasing motion, then winked at me.

Edward and Emmett ran after Jake, pulling their cigarettes out as well, while Jasper haggardly walked down stairs, "what in the hell is all the commotion about?"

He passed by me, giving Renee a hug, "Hey mom."

I smiled at Bella, then at them. Jasper always called our mom 'mom', ever since they met three years ago.

"Hey buddy, how are you?"

"Fine, what are ya'll doing here?"

"Just grabbing some things, having a few beers with everyone, then we're on our way."

"Cool," he said, giving Alice a hug, before lifting her tiny body up and sitting her down on his lap.

"You look like you're feeling better," she said, rubbing his hair.

"A little."

I turned back to Bella, making sure no one can hear us, "Come on. The guys aren't around, we'll... just do it together."

"No..."

"Bella. Yes."

"I can't."

"Dammit, Bella, I can't do it for you."

"Rose..."

"It's not like you're the only one who's in a jam here, Bella. Me too. You know... Jake?"

Bella groaned, pulling her head back to look at the light in the kitchen, "I don't want to lose him."

"Give Edward some credit," I said, scoffing at her, "he's a pretty damn good guy. Plus... hello... career choice. Do you really think th-"

"It's different, Rose," she said, swallowing hard. "Besides... I don't even think... I am."

"Then do it for me. Please?"

She sighed, looking to the ground, "I have to talk to him, don't I?"

I nodded, "it would be wise."

She bit her top lip, rubbing the back of her neck, "...okay."

"Okay?" I asked, rubbing her arms.

"Yeah... okay."

"...Okay," I said, pulling her to me and giving her a tight hug, "It's going to be all right, Bella. This won't change you and Edward."

"I hope so," she replied faintly.

We spent the next thirty minutes lightening up the conversation with the rentals.

Edward sat next to Bella after the guys came back from their smoke breaks, remaining mostly silent.

Emmett sat away from me as possible, hardly even looking my way.

It sucked, because I couldn't go up to my step-mom and say, 'Hey mom, here's my boyfriend, Emmett... I believe you guys met in High School.'.

Now all I could say is, 'Hey mom, this is the guy I fucked over because I'm stupid and moronic. You remember Emmett, right?'.

Yeah... That'd be brilliant.

Eventually, the parents stood up and gave all of us hugs goodbye.

We agreed to meet them in town tomorrow for a big lunch.

It made me so thrilled to know they weren't staying here with us while we were here... and I prayed that their showing up didn't put a damper on the moods with us. We all were about to be heading back to work in a few days, and the last thing we needed was to be pissy with each other until then. We were all grown ups here. We could handle the rental units.

I watched as Esme and Bella hugged, Bella about freaking out on the inside, Esme looking just as uncomfortable...

Edward offered to shake Phil's hand again, but my stubborn father refused.

Once they left, Edward fell backward, collapsing sideways on the couch, "fucking finally."

"My God!" Emmett said, running and jumping on the love seat, "I felt like we were all in trouble for doing drugs."

"Thank God they didn't smell that weed on you," Jake laughed, causing the other guys to chuckle.

"Wait, what?" Bella said, standing up. "You all smoked out there? Like smoke-smoked?"

"Yep!" Emmett shouted, laughing.

My sister turned, glaring down the love of her life, "...Edward?"

"Yes," he asked, throwing his arms behind his back, his voice as rusky as all the rest of the guys, "love?"

She put her hands on her hips, shaking her head, "...I cannot believe you smoked tonight."

"Why?" he asked.

"Because! Hello, parents here! Your mom hates me, Phil's not happy with you! Why one earth would you give them more of a reason?"

"Bella," he chuckled, rubbing his stomach, "I'm not ten. I'll do what I want."

"Oh, that's smart," she hissed at him.

Then she turned and glared at me, with an expression that read, Do you see what I have to put up with?!

I shrugged my shoulders at her, thinking, You picked him, Bella.

"Bella," he said, sitting up, grabbing her arm, and gently tugging her to lay down on top of him, "please don't go all demanding on me. Please don't."

"I'm not," she said, burying her face in his chest, in frustration, "but couldn't you have just waited until they left?"

"Everyone else was doing it, Bella. Regardless of if I smoked or not, the weed would have still been around."

She growled into his navy blue t-shirt, "Grrrr."

"Grrrr what?"

"Just... Grrrr."

He lifted his head, looking over at Emmett and Jacob, as if asking, What the fuck?

Emmett and Jake just laughed at him, but stopped short when they saw me glaring at them disapprovingly. Stupid guys.

Jasper stood up, stretching, "I cannot believe you guys fucking smoked without me."

"Want some?" Jake asked, taking a sip of his beer.

"Yep."

"Ugh, Jazz!" Alice groaned, squeezing a pillow between her legs, "Please, you just got to feeling better."

"Didn't you hear?" Emmett chuckled as he and Jake began to pull Jasper into the kitchen and out the back door, "Weed is a cure-all for pain and sickness."

"Whatever," the three of us girls hissed at them.

"Edward, you coming?"

Edward took one look at Bella's disapproving face, and shook his head, laying back and throwing his arm over his eyes, "No. I'm baked enough."

"Fucking pussy whipped bitch!" Emmett shouted, tossing a plastic cup at him.

"Quit it," Edward said, not removing his arm from his eyes.

"Come on, just come out here with us," Jake said, which really confused me because when did Edward and Jake suddenly start getting along?? "We promise we won't make you smoke with us."

Edward groaned, shaking his head, "Can't do it, guys."

"PUSSY WHIPPED!"

"So what if he is," Bella said, tossing the cup back at Emmett, "leave him alone."

"Should we start calling you Pussward, Eddykins?" Emmett teased, as he playfully began to rub his nipples over his shirt.

Jake and Jasper began making cracking whip noises, while Emmett ran over and rubbed Edward's hair, "Come on, come out with us."

"No."

"Yes."

"No."

"YES!"

"No fucker!"

"I NEED TO TALK TO EDWARD!" Bella shouted, suddenly sitting up to a straddle position on him.

All the guys froze, then Emmett went back to his snarky attitude, "Bella, I promise, weed won't make his dick shrivel. It'll still be a soldier when we get back inside."

"No," she said, glaring at him. "Now."

Again, they cracked the whip on Edward, laughing as they went out the door.

Edward sat up on his elbows, glaring at Bella, "what's up?"

"What did you want to talk to me about earlier?"

"My dad called, stating that he may be seeing us all here soon. I guess he thought that they were going to see us Sunday when we were about to leave, but instead, they showed up tonight."

"Was that it?"

"Yes."

"Oh."

"Why?" he asked, rubbing her thighs suggestively, "What did you think I was going to tell you?"

"I... wasn't sure."

JasperPOV

"So," I said, looking over at Emmett and Jake as we stood out on the freezing balcony, "what have I missed?"

"A whole fucking lot," Emmett said through a gust of wind, passing the joint to Jake.

"Like what?" I asked, taking a sip of beer. My god it tasted so good after being sick all fucking day.

"Like... I think that Rose and I are fucking done for good."

"Really?" I asked, taking a hit after Jake passed it to me. "Why?"

"Well, after our talk at the bar, I ended things with her. And she's hardly said anything to me since then and I just... I don't know, I don't see her that way now. It's sad, but I look at her now, and I'm just disgusted that I let myself get that deep with a girl I hardly knew."

"What the fuck do you mean by 'disgusted'?" Jake asked harshly. "She's a good girl, Emmett."

"Maybe to you," Emmett scoffed. "In fact, you would know, wouldn't you, Jake?"

"Calm down," I said, standing between them. "Straighten up."

Jake shook his head, taking another hit before passing it to Emmett, "...I'm sorry if Rose and I bothers you, Emmett. But she played me too, in a way, and I'm not over there fucking dwelling on it. She fucked up, shit happens, who the fuck cares, you know? I care for the girl enough to not let it bother me for eternity."

Emmett shook his head, "I just... I'm not you, Jake."

"No one is," he replied cockily.

"I let my guard down with her, and we all see where it got me:... Fucked."

"Shit happens," Jake shrugged, passing the joint to me, "then we die. So I figure, we may as well have some fun in the mean time?"

"But, don't you ever just want to fuckin' chill and relax with someone?" I asked Jake, "You know, calm down a bit?"

"Sure," he replied, shrugging nonchalantly, "but shit don't always happen the way you plan."

I smirked, "Yeah, well sometimes you just have to go and get it."

They both turned and gawked at me stupidly, while Emmett said, "Okay Dr. fucking Phil."

I scowled at them, "you know what I mean."

"Jesus fucking Christ, your as pussy-whipped as Edward is."

"I am not," I declined, rounding my shoulders, "I just... I'm over the fucking chase."

"Not me," Emmett sighed, "...The chase is too much fun."

"Sometimes," Jake half-agreed.

"Hey, not to sound all fucking girly, but how many girls have you fucked, Jake?"

Jake turned, looking over at Emmett, "that is pretty girly."

"Just tell me. I'll tell you my number. Around 17 now."

"Actually fucked?"

"Yeah."

"Like, not just foreplay, but actually-"

"Yes."

Jake sighed, "I've had completely consensual, safe sex, with about twenty girls Only one of them meant more to me that just a fuck though... sad as that sounds."

"Where is she now?" Emmett teased.

"...Around."

"What about you, Jasper?" Emmett asked.

I shrugged, "I don't know, like six."

"Damn, Jake, you're the whore here."

"What about Edward?" Jake asked, turning to peer through the kitchen window at Edward and Bella, who were cuddling on the couch.

"I think he's fucked like seven chicks. But he's fooled around with countless women."

"What do you mean by 'fooled around'?" I asked them, drinking more of my beer.

They both turned and gawked at me, again.

"Oh," I chuckled. "Oh. Wow. Damn."

"And then you wonder why we all didn't go into his profession," Jake chuckled. "Dammit."

"No fucking shit." Emmett laughed, "Edward once met a girl, she was his first assistant, when he started under-shadowing his Senior OB-GYN. She was only like eighteen years old or something. Fucking big blue eyes, long blonde hair, tight ass bangin' body... The same day, he came home and was like, 'Dude, she's a virgin. I have such a damn crush on her... I've got to have it.' Her name was like... Aimee or something. He spent like, two weeks pursuing her ass. I mean, hard core! And she had a boyfriend on top of it! He started like, sending her flowers, buying her lunch and shit. I mean, working the suaveness big time."

Emmett shook his head, continuing his story, "I remember meeting him for lunch, and he was wearing his fucking whole doctor's gear, white robe, stethoscope, all that shit... girls just ate that shit up. And he was stroking the underside of her chin, leaning over her desk... My God, it was pathetic. I had a good laugh about it... Long story short, I came over to his and Alice's apartment, and I have a key, so I just let myself in... I fucking walked in on that shit... I mean, Edward had her bent over the fucking couch."

"What?" I asked, laughing.

"Yeah, it was great! She wasn't a virgin anymore! And I just like froze, I didn't know what to do. He quickly covered her up, took in the bedroom, fucking finished that shit, and then sent her on her way shortly after. Then he came out to me and says, 'Hey man, thanks for showing up, I didn't know how in the hell I was going to get her to leave afterward.'"

Jake and I were laughing pretty hard now. "I knew he was like that," I said, shaking my head. "I knew he was that type of guy."

"So, what about her boyfriend?" Jake asked, taking a hit.

"She fell for Edward, I guess, and told her boyfriend they needed to break up. Ed took her on a few dates, but he told me it was boring, because he couldn't chase her anymore. So he ended it."

"Ha!" I chuckled, rubbing my stomach, "Priceless."

"That was Edward... you know, before he got bitch-whipped."

"Think he'll stick this one out?" Jake asked Emmett.

Em shrugged, stealing the joint from me, "guess we'll see... I mean, I think he will. But Edward always tends to surprise."

BellaPOV

Edward was rubbing my back, while I lay above him on the couch.

I listened to his heart beating slowly beneath my ear, while his hands began to massage beneath my shirt... heading toward my pants.

Opening my eyes, I felt his fingers dip under the inside of them. I popped my head up, glaring at him.

He slowly opened one eye, and grinned devilishly at me, "what?"

"You know what."

"I don't know what you're talking about."

"Hands. On ass cheeks. Under my panties."

"Do you like it?" he teased, giving me a tight squeeze and massage.

"Oh yes," I joked, "I love it when you squeeze my ass in front of your best friend and my sister."

"Mmm," he said, dipping his hands lower... fingers almost... there, "...good."

Instantly, I felt my stomach knot uncomfortably, and I stat up so straddle him, removing hs hands from the back of my pants, "Are you always horny when you're high?"

"Yes," he smiled at me honestly.

I shook my head, trying not to smile at him.

"Wanna... you know... cure my ache?" he asked, licking his lips as he began to shift me against his body for friction.

"Edward..." I said, grabbing his wrists tightly, "...please stop."

"Bella, what's the matter with you?" he asked, sitting up on his elbows, "You're acting so strange now that the parents left."

"Well," I scoffed, placing his hands down on the couch, "I just don't want you groping me in front of everyone."

"I was only teasing you, Angel."

"Still."

"Okay," he said, "fine. I won't grope you anymore. I didn't mean any harm."

"Sure."

He glared at me, and I didn't like it. It made my stomach knot tighter.

"You're mood swings are freaking me out a little," he said uncomfortably. "I don't like it."

For some reason, this upset me, and I gave him more of an evil eye, "Well, I'm sorry if I can't make you happy all the time, Edward. You know, sometimes, I'm just having a bad day or a bad moment, and I can't constantly be your fucking sunshine, and your fucking rainbows, and your fu-"

"Whoa, whoa," he said, raising his hands in the air as he sat up beneath me, "slow your role, woman."

Again, I glared at him.

"Jesus," he said, shaking his head.

I crossed my arms over my chest, feeling stupid, but threatened somehow.

"You know what? Just get off me if you're going to act like that."

Now that hurt my feelings, because Edward doesn't really talk to me like that. I knew my jaw dropped down to the ground.

Defensive Edward was here now, and it was my fault. Go figure.

"I mean it," he said, lifting me in the air. He stood up, plopping me back down on the couch before he walked away, "I was just trying to fucking joke around with you, Bella. Damn."

I swallowed hard, feeling really hurt as I clutched the neclace between my fingers tightly. I watched him grab a beer, throw on his jacket, and step outside iwth the guys, slamming the door hard on his way out. Then I turned to Rose, my chin quivering, "what's wrong with me?"

She sighed, walking over to sit down beside me, as Alice looked stunned, sitting on the floor.

"Alice," she said, as she rubbed my leg, "can you give me and Bella a moment?"

"Sure," Alice nodded, standing up, "I'll just... be upstairs."

After she left, Rosalie turned to me, "Bella, what was that all about?"

"I don't know," I groaned, throwing my head back on the couch, "I just suddenly felt threatened and turned into a bitch on him. I know he's being rude because he's drinking and high, and pissed that the parents showed up, but I just... blew up at him. I don't get it."

"Bella," she sighed, scooting closer to me, "...I think you're pregnant."

"Rose, I'm n-"

"No Bella. I really... really think you are."

I sighed, throwing my hands into my palms, "I can't be."

"But I think you are."

"Please stop."

"You need to make up with Edward. Talk to him, Bella. He's a fucking professional at this shit. Tell him, you're going to have to tell him."

"What if I just get an abortion?" I spat out, not thinking about my words.

Rose glared at me, leaning back a bit, "don't you fucking say that shit, Bella."

I sighed, slumping over, "I know. I'm sorry. I'd never do that... I just... God, I just don't want to fucking lose him, Rose. I just got him back."

"It's going to be okay," she said, pulling me in her arms, "it is... Do you want me to go get him? So you have support?"

I nodded, wiping my traitor tears away. Damn hormones.

"Okay... I'll go get him. Stay here."

I nodded again, clutching my throat between my fingers. I suddenly felt like throwing up.

Edward came in, and stood in front of me, hands in his pockets, "Bella... I'm sorry that I went off on you."

"Me too," I whispered faintly, staring down at his shoes. "I'm sorry."

He knelt in front of me, tucking my hair behind my ears, "...there was something else I want to talk to you about... Wanna go upstairs?"

I nodded, wiping away tears beneath my swollen eyes.

He scooped me up in his arms, tossing me playfully over his shoulder. "Thanks Rose."

"No problem."

Once we were in the bedroom, Edward sat me on the bed, kneeling before me there. He swallowed hard, shaking his head as he gathered my hands in his.

I titled my head, sniffling, as I wiped some of his stray hairs back from his forehead.

He appeared nervous. I didn't like it.

"Bella," he started, sighing, "there's something that I've kept from you, that I shouldn't have... and I'm really, really worried about how you'll react when I tell you."

"W-What is it?"

He placed his forehead in my lap, shaking his head.

I scratched through his hair, then began to massage his shoulders, "What? Edward, what is it?"

He seemed so hesitant as he lifted his head, "All right... you're not going to like it, but I really want you to know... That way there's no secrets between us."

"Okay..."

He pulled in his lips, choosing his words carefully, "do you... remember when you told me about... James?"

I swallowed and gave him a slight nod.

"Well... what you told me... it, uh, it really broke my heart, see? I mean, it furiated me. I felt like it was my fault and-"

"Edward, why would you think that?" I asked.

"Please," he replied gently, holding up a hand, "please let me finish."

"All right."

He inhaled again, looking up at me, "I felt like it was my fault, because you and I had broken up. I felt if we never broken up, you wouldn't have been in the position to have fallen for his bullshit, and thefor, you wouldn't have... been hurt, the way you did."

His face looked so tortured, it pained me to see him so distraught. And hearing about James, that only made me feel more nauseated.

"And... well... I couldn't shake it off. I mean, I'm not saying that I've never been a prick, because I have. I've hooked up with girls and not called them the next day... I've put up challenges when it comes to women... but I would never, ever put my hands on a female like that, you know? I'd never, ever fucking treat them the way that he... treated you."

I frowned at him, "I know you wouldn't."

"Yeah... well... it affected me so much, that... I sort of decided to do something about it."

I furrowed my brows at him, "Edward, what are you talking about?"

He haggardly rose to his feet, shoving his hands in his jean pockets as he took a step back from me, "Bella... I set him up."

"Huh?" I asked. "Edward, you're not making sense."

"I know," he sighed, shaking his head, "...Bella, I set him up. I... sort of weaseled my way in order to trap him into... meeting me... here."

"What?" I demanded, rising to my feet, "When? How?"

He stared at me, still looking painfully numb.

Then all the words came tumbling out of his mouth, "It upset me so much, that I talked to my boys about backing me up. Then I lied to Alice, told her to create some kind of contest, to make him believe that he won a trip down here to meet a secret crush. It was that night of the party, the night that you saw me with the blonde, the night that you and I almost... had sex in the garage. It was that night. I set it all up, made sure you weren't going to be in the vicinity of the same room as him... And then my guys led him in the garage, and I confronted him with it... Well, actually I did more than confront him... I beat the holy fuck out of him. I mean, I just fucked his world all up... I couldn't stop. I blacked out and raged on him. I almost killed him, and I wanted to, but then I saw your face in my head, and knew you'd never fucking forgive me if I did, and I couldn't risk losing you, so I just made sure he wasn't going to call the fucking cops, and I sent him on his way afterward. And I'm sorry that I kept it from you, but I knew you'd freak out, and I was so afraid of losing you. But that's why I was all scraped up and bruised that night that ... you and I, we made love. That was why, and I'm sorry if I hurt you by going behind your back."

He stumbled forward a bit, his lips moving as if he was about to say something else, but he stopped himself.

All I could do was stare at him.

I couldn't even comprehend what he just told me at first.

We stood still, staring at each other, chests heaving heavily -- him from talking so fast for so long, and me for just... being in here and hearing it.

Once a single tear fell straight from my eyes and onto the floor, my throat clenched shut, and all the anger washed over me.

Heavily.

I stormed toward him, my eyes growing more slant by the second.

Then I slapped him.

Harder than I've ever hit anything before in my life.

Right across his left cheek, just like I did that night in the club three weeks ago when he said he chose Tanya.

Everything that was flowing in my brain, all the words, about a mile a minute, was unable to form into sentences.

Edward stood, eyes watering almost over the brim from the intensity of my hand, inhaling unsteadily through his nose.

He's so fucking stupid! Holy hell, is he fucking crazy?! How could he do this?!

I slapped him again.

He closed his eyes for a few seconds, trying to maintain his composure, before opening them and looking at me.

He just fucking stood there, and took it.

That angered me.

All I could do was think, How could you be so reckless, you dumb idiot? How could you do that!

"Bella, I-"

His voice cut off as I slammed my hands in his chest, pushing him back.

The tears came out from my eyes and my chest went heavier, but nothing helped.

"Bella, please, I-"

His eyes shut as my shoving him back cut his words off again.

"Shut up," I spat at him, pushing him into the closet. "Just shut the hell up!"

He kept his eyes closed, his chest bouncing heavier.

I tried to yell at him, to say something else, but nothing could come out.

And I grew angrier. I kept pushing on him, hard, on the chest.

I could hear slats cracking each time I pushed onto him, driving him deeper into the wooden bi-fold closet door.

It drove me further.

"Bella, stop," he whispered.

But I couldn't. "Stupid," I spat at him as I continued my practical assault. "Stupid, stupid, stupid! STUPID!"

"Bella," he panted, sealing his eyes as my forces got worse. "Stop it, please."

I could barely see him, could hear the cracking all around me, could feel the amount of pressure I was thrusting upon him.

He kept trying to speak through my pushing, his words coming out in stutters from my sheer force to his lungs, "Bella, please, d-don't make me st-stop you."

Every single word out of his mouth brought my defenses up higher.

All I could think about was James.

Then Edward.

Then James. Then Edward. Then James. Then Edward.

Then James... Then James... Then James... Then James again...

James breathing in my ear... James pushing onto my hips, shoving my head down hard into the pillow... James yanking pieces of my hair out... James pulling me back to him, as my fingernails shredded the sheets apart... James slamming my face into the mirror attached to his headboard... James thrusting behind me... James flipping me around...

"Stop!" I shouted, at the same time Edward was shouting at me.

"Bella! Stop!"

"Stop! Stop! Stop it, you fucking asshole!" My vision suddenly went black, then white, then I saw James, then Edward, faster and faster, it felt like my world was just flipping out of control.

Edward grabbed my wrists, and wrestled me to the ground, to where he was on top of me, restraining me from slapping him.

"BELLA!" he shouted in my ear, holding me down, "it's me! It's Edward!"

I wrestled against him for a few moments, thrashing around on the wooden floor of my bedroom.

Then suddenly, it all came out, and I knew where I was.

I was beneath Edward... not James. And I lashed out on Edward, like he was James.

I never really thought about James after the incident... the mere mention of his name turned my stomach all the wrong ways.

So for me to honestly think about what he did.. for it all to come back at me so quickly, it hurt.

I held still, allowing my chest to heave beneath him.

"It's okay... just breathe," he whispered unsteadily.

"Edward," I whimpered, turning my head away from him.

I watched as his hands released my wrists, then he dug his arms beneath me, scooping me up from the middle of my back.

"It's okay, I've got you, shhhhhh..." He cradled me, sitting indian-style on the wooden floor.

Everyone in the cabin barged inside the bedroom, but I didn't see them, only heard.

"What the fuck is going on?!" Jake shouted.

"What happened?!" asked Jasper.

"Did you tell her?" Emmett demanded.

"Did she tell you?" Rosalie asked, at the same time.

"What the hell?" Alice said.

I could feel people shuffling all around us, but I held tighter to Edward's neck, praying the last ten minutes would rewind and never happen.

"I didn't mean to," I sobbed into Edward's neck, "I didn't mean to, I didn't mean to."

"What is gong on?!" Jake shouted again.

"She's fine," Edward whispered, as he rubbed my back tenderly, "everyone, I've got her."

"Did she tell you?" Rose asked again.

"Tell him what?" Alice replied.

"Did you tell her?" Emmett repeated his question.

"Did he tell her what?" Jasper asked, then said, "Did she tell him what? What the fuck is going on?"

"That's what I'd like to know."

"GUYS!" Edward shouted, making me wince.

"Oh my God, Edward, your face... did you get slapped again?!" Alice said, her voice aiming toward me.

"I'm fine," Edward replied, as I sobbed, "I'm sorry, Edward. I didn't mean to."

"Did she tell you?" Rosalie asked, huffing as Edward lifted me up in the air with him.

"Guys calm down, let him talk," Emmett said.

A few minutes later, I was more composed and was able to speak. "It's not him, it was me," I explained. "I went off, and I'm so sorry Edward."

"Shhh, don't even speak of it," Edward said, brushing the hair out of my eyes. "I'm really sorry that I did what I did Bella."

"What did you do? What did she do? What is going on?" Alice asked as she rubbed my back.

Edward sighed, looking toward Emmett, "I told her."

"...Yeah?" Emmett asked, slowly sitting down on the other side of me.

"Yeah... it triggered... her thoughts of him."

Emmett slouched over, rubbing his face vigorously, "Shit man. Are you okay?"

"I'm sorry," I sobbed into Edward's ear. I can't believe I just went off on him like that... How stupid am I?!?!

Quickly, Jasper scooped me off of the bed, cradling my face in his chest, "Edward, is this about James?"

I could hear Edward murmur, "yes" very lightly.

Everyone kept asking questions around us, one at at time, speaking softly, and Edward anwered them calmly.

Each time James's name was brought up, I winced.

I felt people passing me around, from Jasper, to Rosalie as she jerked me away from him, then back to the sanctuary of Edward's arms.

Again, I tried apologizing to him, but he'd have none of it.

He kept apologizing to me as well, between answering everyone's questions.

*&*#!#$^%$^

Eventually, after we all calmed down, we were back downstairs.

Edward offered me a beer, which I declined, choosing to curl up in his lap again.

I felt drained, of course, but all I wanted to do was never leave him again.

"It's... not that I was angry at you for what you did," I whispered in his ear, while everyone around us stayed quiet, playing cards on the floor, "it's just... I cannot believe you did that, Edward. My concern was... what if you got hurt? What if he hurt you? What if-"

"Bella, he never even hit me," Edward whispered in response. "I understand, and I'm sorry for making you hurt and wonder about that, but that's why I had my friends there. We didn't gang up on him or anything... they were only there to make sure he didn't touch me, and I didn't kill him."

"But he's so dangerous," I whimpered into his blue shirt.

"Trust me," he said, "you've never seen me as pissed off as I was that night... I'm pretty sure I scared the fuck out of him."

"This is serious," I replied, "what if I lost you?"

"You're not going to lose me. I'm right here."

"No, Edward. I don't want to hear that. Just... never, ever, ever do something so foolish like that again. I'll never forgive myself if it happens again, with anyone. If anyone hurts you."

"I'm sorry I hurt you, Bella."

"Edward, don't you get it?" I asked weakly as I pulled back to look at his face, "it's not about me. It's about you. I don't want you to ever get hurt... I... I lost you once. I won't be able to live through it if I lose you again. So you have to stop fighting every single person that does something stupid. Okay?"

"Yeah," he whispered, massaging the back of my neck. "I promise."

"Do you really?"

"Yes. I promise."

"Okay..." I nodded.

Suddenly, Rosalie cleared her throat, snapping my attention to her.

I knew what she was going to suggest. And she was right.

It was time that we took the test.

She held up her finger, as if saying, One moment.

JacobPOV

Ace and Queen of hearts, fucking score.

"Jake," Rosalie said, suddenly grabbing my hand, "can you come with me for a second?"

She knocked the cards out of my hand, showing everyone what I had, and ignored my cursing as she pulled me out of the room with her.

"What the fuck?" I said as she shoved me into the Grotto, closing the rock door behind her, "I was going for the straight flush!"

"Shut up, Jake, please, this is serious."

"What?" I asked, sticking my hands in my pocket.

Then I lowered my voice when I saw her face, "what is it?"

She took a deep breath, suddenly staring at the hot tub behind us.

Oh fuck. What is it?

I took a step toward her, lifting her chin with my index finger so she'd look me in the eyes, "Tell me."

She shuffled from foot to foot, then pursed her lips together, "I'm late, Jake."

"Huh?" I asked, because the heavy weed-beer-Edward/Bella-mixture was fucking with my head.

"I'm late... My period. I'm late to have it."

"Oh." I said, dropping my fingers from her face.

"Yeah."

I stood still for a few moments.

Then I nodded, feeling really fucking confused, as I stumbled back a bit, "Huh."

"Yeah," she repeated.

"By, uh, how long?"

She took a deep breath, "Bella and I had our period the same week. Because we live together, our periods work around each other's like clock work. It happens with most women who are at close-quarters with each other. It was exactly two weeks and one day for her, before we got here, and mine was two weeks and four days before we got here."

"So... what does that mean, exactly?"

"It means that, we got here on the 27th of December. My period end date was around the 11th, and Bella's around the 14th or 15th... So... conveniently, that means I had sex with you two weeks after my period... right around when my body is most responsive to becoming pregnant."

"And... uh... how late are you now?"

"We've been here two weeks and two days counting today. It's the 11th. So I'm about three days late, I think. Give or take."

I nodded, keeping my hands in my pocket.

She looked up at me, looking pretty fucking staggard, "I'm sorry, Jake."

"But I used a condom. Every time we did it."

"I know. Sometimes it still happens though."

"Aren't you on the pill?"

"I started a new birth control last month. My body may not be adjusted to it yet."

"But uh..." I shook my head, because I was still really fucking confused, "are you feeling like, any symptoms?"

"Not really, no. Not like Bella or anything. But I've been late about twice in my entire life, and both times were when I was really young and a virgin still."

"Wait," I said, stepping back toward her, "Bella thinks she's pregnant too?"

She scoffed, looking agitated, "No, but I think she is. She has all the symptoms plus she's late."

"Edward?"

"Yeah. But he has no idea yet."

"Wow," I whispered, looking up at the rock ceiling, "how shit can change in a matter of a couple weeks."

"I know," she said weakly.

I looked at her again and she quickly fought back her tears, clearing her face up before they fell.

I took a deep breath, sucking my lips in, "Okay."

"Huh?"

"It's, uh, it's going to be okay. We'll figure it out."

She nodded, "Bella's going to talk to Edward, and then, we're going to take the tests."

"You both bought tests?"

"I got the double pack."

"Hmm," I replied, rubbing her arms, "well... I'd rather it be with you than anyone else."

"What does that mean?" she replied, half-laughing, half-sad still.

"Well," I shrugged nonchalantly.

Then I began thinking to myself, because I could make you happy. I could be that guy for you. I've got a steady job, I've got my own house. My own car. Your family loves me. My dad loves you.

Because I've been in love with you for three and a half years, and it really, really dawned on me the night we slept together for the first time. It was never Bella... not since High School.

It's been you, Rose, and I've tried to fight it back, and I've tried to move on and be with all these girls, like Bryan, in hopes of it being just a crush.

But it's not. No one else came close. It's you... It's always been you.

"Jake?" she asked, looking up at me with those wide beautiful fucking eyes.

I swallowed back my thoughts, squeezing her hands tight, "because I care for you. And we'd make it work if we needed to."

"Yeah," she whispered faint-like, looking down to the ground hesitantly, "...I guess."

And that's why I'd never tell her how I felt.

EdwardPOV

Bella didn't say a word as she pulled me up the steps, back to the bedroom.

She closed the door and locked it, before pulling me into the bathroom with her, and locking that door behind her as well.

"What are we doing?" I asked, looking around the room.

"I need to talk to you."

"Okay," I said, feeling nervous suddenly, "do we have to do it in the bathroom?"

"Yes."

"All right," I replied, looking at her, fearing for the worse.

Was the James thing too much? Did she not want to be with me anymore?

She began to pace around the room, muttering things under her breath that I couldn't hear.

She clapped her hands together, rubbing her palms harshly, "I need to tell you something, but I don't know, and I'm afraid if I do tell you, then it'll ruin every single thing I have fought so hard to regain with you."

I nodded slowly, sorting out different situations in my head.

"And I'm afraid if I ruin everything, then... we won't get it back this time."

She looked at me fearfully, as I leaned back against the counter top.

"...And I'm afraid you'll hate me for it."

"Bella," I sighed, closing my eyes in frustration, "would you stop. I'm not going to hate you. Ever."

"Don't be so sure," she muttered beneath her breath.

"Look, I'm sure it's not as bad as what I revealed with James," I countered, "so... just tell me."

She covered her face with her hands, breathing out of whack.

I hopped off the counter, pulling her hands down, "tell me."

She began to bounce nervously, from her heels, to her toes, to her heels, to her toes again. "Please don't hate me," she whispered.

"I don't," I reassured her for the umpteenth time.

"Please promise you'll love me after I tell you."

"I do, I promise."

She began popping her knuckles fiestly, zoning out toward my shirt.

"Bella?" I asked, lifting her face between my hands.

"Huh?"

"What is it?"

She began to bounce again, making me more nervous.

The intensity and hesitation ... the fucking suspense was killing me.

She took a deep, long breath, then pursed her lips.

"What?" I asked softly, caressing her cheeks.

She looked into my eyes for a few moments, contemplating her response.

Her answer came out in a mere, weak, faint little whisper, "...I think I'm pregnant."

My eyes grew wide, and I felt myself sort of lock up somehow, hands on her face, standing in front of her.

I turned into a God-damn ice sculpture.

I don't even think I was breathing.

It felt like my neck had rusted as I tried to tilt it to my left a little, forcing my brain to work.

Think... Think Edward... Say something before she fucking freaks out.

I watched as tears began to form in her wide, expectant eyes.

Then, like a tsunami, it all came and hit me in the face...:

Seeing her when she was fifteen years old for that first day in Biology class, thinking about her while I was alone, thinking about her practically every single day... asking her to be my girlfriend, walking through the halls with her, watching her show up to my baseball games...

Falling in love with her, our stupid random fights, the night we almost had sex here when we were eighteen..

The break up, graduation, the heart ache, my stint with drugs and women...

Seeing Bella again... Seeing her with Jasper... Coming here...

The night we had sex, using no condoms, the realization of it, the fights, the reuniting, the being friends again, all the teasing...

Her headaches... Telling her I loved her for the first time... Sex, sex, sex, no condom, sex, more sex, no condom again last night when she woke me up either... Wore a condom today after we got home from our friend-dates...

Holy fucking mother of God. Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit. Fuck. God damn.

I was so fucking blind not to see it, and this was my profession.

But it was Bella... and I had no idea.

Because sooo much shit has happened every single day that we arrived here, that I never really thought too much about it.

But here she was, the love of my life, telling me her fears, and I'm a fucking block of ice.

Speak, dickhead.

I cleared my throat, refocusing in on her loving, worried, caramel eyes.

Then Doctor Edward kicked in, "When was your last period?"

"The last day of it was around the 12th or 13th-ish of December."

"So you've missed your period?"

"...Yes," she replied sheepishly.

"Are your breasts tender?"

"Slightly," she replied, blushing pink.

"Fatigued?"

"Always," she whispered, "but that happens when you're on vacation."

"Well, your mood swings are evident, and clear as day," I declared, thinking back to her constant tears, then happiness, then her lash out on me earlier tonight....

"Yes," she nodded.

"Any discharge?"

"Edward," she growled at me, looking disgusted.

"Bella, please."

"No... not really."

"Morning sickness is rare, especially this early... Really rare... But have you been having anything like it?"

"I don't know if it's really morning sickness as it's just... when certain things happen I feel sick... but nothing in the morning."

"You wouldn't be having cravings yet..." I thought, scanning through my internal memory, thinking about the constant charts I studied, "you've had constant headaches..."

"Yes."

"Bloating?"

"A... little, I guess."

"Are you constipated?"

She covered her face, groaning, "oh my gosh, Edward."

"Are you? It's not going to gross me out."

She shrugged, refusing to respond. That's a yes.

I nodded again, thinking to myself, "how are you feeling at the moment?"

"Scared."

"I mean..."

"I don't know, I just feel... weird. I've been feeling weird the past few days... Dizzy spells... Headaches... Really horny, which could be just because you and I are together and I missed you so much... but... I don't know."

I placed my hands over my mouth, thinking more, "...So we had sex that one night..."

"...Right when I was most fertile, right?"

"Yes... Yes... About three days ago would be when your body begins to register the pregnancy... so this all makes sense, when you think about it..."

"...I know," she half-whimpered.

I stuck my hands in my pocket, trying to figure out exactly where to go from here, "Bella... are you on birth control?"

She cringed slightly, looking down to the ground, "I was on Ortho-Tri-Cyclen Lo... But I missed a few pills a month and a half ago, and it messed me up really bad, making me sick, screwing up my period, giving me one that lasted like, two weeks... The doctor said I had to stop taking it for thirty days, so my body could re-adjust..."

Her voice trailed off, and she began to look guilty.

"...So, you're off of it now..."

She nodded, sucking in her lips as she sat down on the tile.

I knelt beside her, pulling her face up, "This isn't your fault, Bella."

"Edward, you don't have to sa-"

"No, really... This isn't. Things like this... happen. I was careless, and I didn't use a condom, and that is my fault."

"I didn't think of it either," she replied, closing her eyes, "and we didn't use one last night..."

"I know," I said, "my fault again. I shouldn't have assumed we were protected. That was immature of me."

She rubbed her face, shaking her head, "you're going to leave me. You're going to end up hating me. The ex who got back together with you... trapping you with a child."

"Bella," I scoffed, getting closer to her, "don't ever say that. I don't think that of you."

"But that's what everyone else is going to think," she shook her head, trying to push away from me, "they're going to think I got you back by trapping you."

"I don't think that," I replied, trying to remain calm, "I'd never think that. I won't let anyone else think that either."

"I'm so scared, Edward... this is going to change everything if it's true."

I nodded, rubbing her knees, "I know it's scary... I wish we were back home, that way I could run some tests, do a urinalysis and a pap."

She blushed, conveniently, and buried her head further in her hands, "you will never be my doctor. Ever, ever, ever."

"Why not?"

"Because. Ew. That's gross."

"Bella," I replied, not caring that we were getting off track for a moment, "I've kissed and licked and touched every single part of your body... I've been in and out of you, with my penis, my fingers, my tongue, my lips.. Come on, I've seen it all."

If her face could be any redder, she'd burst into a tomato plant, "shut up. Besides, you don't have your license yet."

"Well, I had good grades in college, graduating early acception -- thank you -- and a top score on my MCATs. I've also met all the prerequisites of medical school -- and I'd sort of like to thank you, for keeping me interested in biology and chemistry, by the way -- and I've already gotten my residency position accredited for, meaning I am working at the hospital, beneath the Head, and fill-in when they're out. Just like any other career, the grades are most important, not necessarily the years. I've been in school since I was eighteen, so I've got five years of experience beneath my belt... I'm more than half-there..."

I smirked, shaking my head, "...I'm pretty sure that, since I've been in parts of surgeries and deliveries lasting over twenty-four hours at a time... that I can handle a urinalysis and pap. Regardless of if I have an actual license."

"That's illegal."

"So?" I replied, though I knew she was right. But the sickening yet hot and sexy idea of her on a table and me in my wear, sitting on that swivel chair between her thighs...

Then I realized we were getting off track, and quickly straightened myself out.

I needed to be the strong one here, the man, the one in control. I had to stay cool, despite my internal organs that are freaking out inside of me.

"Okay... so... here's what we'll do... It's been a couple of weeks, so your body should be able to register the human growth hormone that a test can make out... But I'm not positive on that, as one can never be this early. So.. We'll go and get you a test that you can take at home, and if it says you are, then we'll go to the hospital and get some blood work drawn. There's different types, so if we ask for a... a...." I slapped my head, trying to make the words come out, "...a Qualitative Blood Test, which is different, because it just recognizes that you have hgH in your system, instead of measuring the exact amount... but it'll tell us if you are..."

She nodded.

I crawled toward her, tossing a towel beside her, "lay back and put your head on that for a sec."

"Edward, you are not going t-"

"I just want to feel your stomach."

She stared at me confused, then did as I asked.

I pursed my lips, lifting her shirt. Then I massaged her skin so it'd loosen up, and began pressing above her uterus, "that hurt?"

"Mmhmm."

"Tender?"

"Very."

"Hmm..." I said, trailing down my hands. I unfastened the button and unzipped her jeans, pushing her underwear down a few inches. Then I pressed there with my fingers. "Tender?"

"Yes," she whispered.

I nodded, feeling around more with my thumbs, "and here?"

"No."

"...Here?"

"S-Sorta."

"Okay... what about here?"

"Yes. What does this all mean Edward?"

I re-fastened her pants, and pulled her and myself up, "it means... I think you may be right. But there's only one way to find out."

As I grabbed her hand, she pulled on me, "wait, what about Rose?"

That was when it dawned on me that Rosalie was the one that got the pregnancy tests.

Fuck. This could be really bad.

"What kind of test did she get again?" I asked.

Bella shrugged still looking uncomfortable as fuck.

"All right," I said, pulling her to me, "let's go find out... but first... give me those sexy lips."

"Edward," she said, shoving her face into my chest bashfully.

"No, I mean it," I chuckled, pulling her face up, "I want 'em."

She looked up at me through those lashes, which caused my body to have reactions quite like the ones that put us in this predicament in the first place, and I just fucking let loose, saying fuck it, and slipped my tongue inside the warm, sweet depths of her mouth, before I even pressed my lips to hers.

She tasted incredible. Just like always.

And maybe I was kissing her to try and calm her down... but did it work?

RosaliePOV

I waited nervously beside Jacob on the couch, after Emmett took the Xbox upstairs to drink with Jasper, and Alice crashed out on the chase.

My knees were trembling, my stomach was flipping, my throat was squeezed tight, I felt like throwing up... and Jake... he looked fucking calm.

I gawked at him, turning his face to me hastily, "How on earth is that I am twenty four, and you are twenty one, and yet you are the calm one in this situation."

He shrugged, slouching down into the cushions of the couch comfortably, "life happens."

"What do you mean by that?"

"Well," he said, fiddling with his lighter, "in movies, it's all about white picket fences and fucking rose gardens, and career, man, marriage, then baby... But shit like that hardly ever happens the way we plan for it to happen here in the real world. Children are born before the woman finds the right man. Others are just conceived before marriage. It never really goes in order."

"But, Jacob," I whispered, edging closer to him, "you could be a dad. You could be a dad to my baby."

He turned toward me, his face a dazzling mere inch from mine, and whispered almost seductively, "...Would that be such a bad thing?"

Momentarily, my breath wooshed away from me, but I quickly regained my senses, pushing my face away from his, "yes. It would."

His expression turned into a glare and he turned away, taking a sip of his beer, "what if it were Emmett instead?"

"Huh?"

"Emmett. What if it was you and Emmett, what if he were the dad of this potential baby?"

I began to stammer, feeling really weird suddenly, "...I love Emmett."

He scoffed, shaking his head. Then he leaned forward, cradling the back of his neck with his hands, muttering beneath his breath.

"Jake?" I asked, leaning forward to rub his back.

He stood up, walking away from me, "let's just take the test, okay, Rose?"

I nodded, swallowing hard, "...s-sure. I'll go get Edward."

*&*#!#$^%$^

After I got Edward, and showed him the test that I got, he instantly shook his head, "that's not a good one."

"What do you mean? It's E.P.T."

"It's not the best choice for earliest pregnancy prediction. You need a different one."

"Why didn't you tell me that before I got it?" I gritted through my teeth.

"Because I didn't know the circumstances before," he hissed back at me. "It was none of my business. I mean, how was I supposed to know you weren't with someone before we got here?"

I glared at him, though he had a point. "Fine. What kind do I get?"

"We'll need a First Response Early Result test. They're the best. From what I remember, it's like, you can take it three to five days before you even miss your period or some shit. It has the highest sensitivity."

"Let's just go and get it then, there's a drug store a few blocks from here."

"We," he said, turning and slapping Jake hard on the back, "will go get it. You two just stay put. Especially you," he pointed to Bella.

"Ugh, what did I do?"

"That's my potential child in there," he replied, "and I'm not having you going out in town this late. Stay here."

Bella growled at him, then muttered, "...and it starts."

Edward winked at her, then turned to Jake, smirking at him, "how did you and I end up being in this situation together?"

"At least I used a rubber," Jake replied, "what's your excuse?"

"Fucking hot women climbing into my bedroom in the middle of the night and demanding me to lay a pipe on them."

"Hello," Bella and I hissed at them at the same time, "we are present here. Take the manly conversation elsewhere."

Edward and Bella kissed, while Jake looked at me -- glumly?

I frowned at him. I felt bad for putting him in this position. He was so young.

He'd hate me eventually. Plus, I didn't know what the hell was going on anymore.

After they left, I dropped back on the couch, tossing my feet on the coffee table, "what do you think Edward thinks about this?"

"I have no idea," she groaned, sliding in beside me, "but can you imagine what mom and Phil will think? The both of us... Sisters... Young twenties... Pregnant... Neither of us married... We should go on Jerry Springer."

"Well... It definitely brings a new meaning to starting this year off with a bang," I replied.

"What about Jake? How does he feel?"

"He.. confuses the shit out of me. He acts fine one moment, then he's rushing for us to get it over with the next."

"He'd make an awesome dad though," Bella said, picking at my fingernail polish, "I mean, think about Dalton."

"His little nephew?"

"Yeah. I mean, Jake takes his sister's little boy every other weekend when he's home... Treats that three year old like he's the king of the world... And Jake doesn't act childish at all with him. He really straightens up whenever Dalton and him are together. He's tender, takes care of him like he's his own..."

"He does love him," I sighed.

"He'd love his own even more."

I closed my eyes tight, as my heart clenched over, "Emmett will have a field day with this one if it turns out to be true. He'd never even be able to look at me without laughing and calling me a fraud."

Bella wrapped her arms around me, giving me a side hug, "no offense sis, but... you need to focus on you right now. Not Emmett."

"Yeah," I frowned, "I know... I just... I miss him."

"I know you do. Trust me, I've been there."

"But you got yours back," I objected.

"...I just... I don't want to think about this until they come back. Can we just sit here and watch David Letterman or something?"

"Sure," I replied, kissing the side of her head, "anything for you, Sissy."

I clicked on the remote, and we continued to hold on to each other for support.

In a sad and sadistic way, I was glad she was going through this with me.

At least I wasn't alone.

JacobPOV

It was really fucking weird sitting side by side Edward in his tiny ass, little flashy car.

I rolled down the windows, lighting a cigarette, breathing in the artic chill from outside, "can you fucking believe this man?"

Edward scoffed, shaking his head, "Not really."

I handed him a cigarette, which he accepted, "I feel like such an embacil."

"It's not your fault Jake. You were protected."

"Like it fucking helped. If I knew I was going to be in this situation, I wouldn't have even worn anything. Hell, it'd feel a hell of a lot better without one."

Edward glared at me as he stopped at the stop sign, "Jake. Come on."

I shrugged, turning back toward the road, "and to think that three weeks ago, I had no fucking idea of what my life may become."

"It happens that way."

"Yeah. At least you're with a girl who's in love with you. That makes it easier on your part."

"What's that mean?"

"I mean, if it was with some random chick, you'd be feeling less calm about it."

"I'm not calm," he replied softly, "I'm just mentally preparing myself. There isn't shit I can do about it at this moment. It's out of my hands. But if I'm prepared, and the test shows positive, I won't be a fucking stiff rod in front of Bella."

"So you're faking your support for her?"

Edward shook his head, turning onto the high way, "I didn't say that. I'd be happy either way I think. I keep thinking to myself, 'you're going to be with this woman regardless, so it's not that big of a deal'. I mean, sure, you know, Phil will probably fucking murder me when he finds out, if my mother or someone else doesn't get to me first... but if I survive the physical damages... then that's still going to be the woman for me, you know? It'd be my job to fight for her, for us."

I took a long, burning drag of my cigarette, shaking my head, "do you like kids?"

"Absolutely."

"So you want them?"

"Yes."

"Do you think you'll be a good dad?"

"I think I have a pretty decent chance of being one, yes. I worry about my demanding career, but I'll have to work around it in order to be there for Bella."

"You act too fucking calm. Fucking quit it! Freak out or some shit. For me, please."

"Jake," he said, turning to me, "it's going to be all right. Either way."

"No, no it's not."

"Why not?"

"Because," I groaned, closing my eyes, "this changes every thing."

"You'll still be young, you'll still be-"

"That's not what I'm talking about," I replied, "I'm just... Rose will never look at me the same. Regardless of is she is or is not pregnant... she'll never, like, see me as Jake anymore. I'll be Jacob now. She won't look at me like I have a light behind me... I won't be on that pedestal anymore. I'll be fucking on the ground, the dirt beneath her shoe. She'll just move on to something else. She'll move on to the Emmett's of the world."

Edward pulled into a parking spot at Walgreen's, and shut off his car, "Jake, if I didn't know you better, I'd say you were in love with her and were worried she wouldn't give you a chance now."

My stomach tightened as I flipped the cigarette onto the parking lot and rolled up the window. Then I sat, silent in the seat.

Edward quickly understood my inability to respond. "Dude... really?"

I unbuckled my seat belt, and swung open the door, "let's just get the shit."

Edward chased after me, stopping my pace as he stood in front of me, guarding the front doors to the store as we stood out on the curb, "Jake you've got to tell her how you feel."

"Don't dictate to me," I spat darkly, before trudging past him.

"Jake, come on, you've got to tell her."

I ignored him, storming through the isles, toward the tests.

Once we got there, Edward stood in front of me again, "Jake. You need to tell her."

"What the fuck do you know about it?"

"I know what it's like to not tell someone how you feel and then regret it for fucking years afterward, wondering to yourself what it'd be like if you did speak up... What if you two were to get together... What if it changed everything..."

"Just get the damn test."

"Don't lock up on her. It'll push her further away."

I reached past him, grabbing a few boxes off the shelf, "which one?"

He glared at me, before snatching one out of my hand, "listen to me. I know what the fuck I'm talking about."

I grabbed another box, identical to the one in his hand, and shoved all the other ones on an empty space on the shelf, "let's go."

"Jake."

"Stop trying to be my fucking daddy, Edward. Don't practice that shit on me."

"I'm trying to speak to you man to man here."

"Fuck that. Let's just go."

The cashier gave us an awkward look, and I rolled my eyes at the sixteen year old idiot, because he was a fucking idiot, "don't even fucking presume it, bitch."

Edward glared at me, before apologizing to the little baby and paying for the shit.

Fucking eighteen dollars a piece, plus tax. For something you piss on.

The car ride back to the cabin was silent. I liked it better that way.

I wasn't in the mood to be preached at. My heart rate was all ready up and my hands were clammy.

I shouldn't have even fucking let on to him that I cared for her. Would have saved me a God-damn headache.

*&*#!#$^%$^

The girls refused us to be in the same room with them, but they went inside together, locking the door.

"Just don't get the tests confused," Edward shouted through the door.

"Go away," Rosalie hissed, before covering the bottom crack with a towel from the inside.

After carrying the dead-to-the-world-Pixie up to her room, Edward sat down on the chase, groaning into his palms.

I did the same thing, sitting on the opposite side of the room.

For some pathetic unknown reason, I was sort of happy he was dealing with this insanity with me.

I'd rather be around someone who was at least trained in this matter, than someone who was as ignorant as I was.

"How long do we have to wait?" I asked, bouncing my elbows and head on my knees.

"Three minutes."

"Three minutes, eh?"

Great.

Three minutes until my life fucking drastically changes, either way.

I cannot fucking wait.

With each ticking of the watch on my wrist, my stomach twisted with another knot...

I couldn't stop thinking about Rose.

About myself.

About Emmett.

About, if Emmett and I were hanging off a cliff and she could only save one, who would it be?

The friend that's been in her life for fifteen years, since I was like, six years old? The one who's been there for her, through thick and thin? Who'd do any fucking thing for her, including sacrifice his personal happiness if she didn't want to be with him?

Or the man she only really got to know a couple weeks ago, but claims to be in love with, though he dumped her cold for stupid pathetic reasons he had no business even fucking judging her over?

Fuck that, I didn't have to think.

I knew who she'd choose, and that made me feel worse.

I groaned, curling over to clutch my upset stomach, and looked up, to see Edward pacing around the room.

"Stop fucking pacing," I moaned shakily, as my forehead grew a thick layer of sweat on it, "it's making me fucking nauseated."

"Sorry," Edward said, suddenly halting to a stop in the middle of the room.

I squinted through my burning eyes, trying to focus on my watch.

Tick.... tick............ tick......................................tick.

"Jake. you okay?" Edward asked, rushing over to me, "you don't look so good."

"Fine," I gasped, rubbing my facial hair harshly, "I just feel hot."

"You're swaying," he said, grabbing my shoulders.

"Y-yeah," I spat, as my heart began to speed up, more than ever before.

I didn't feel right.

Something was wrong.

Something was very, very wrong.

Something was very, very, very fucking wrong. Oh shit.

"Something's wrong," I muttered, as I pulled on him and tried to stand.

"Whoa, whoa, Jacob. Jacob!"

My body began to feel really heavy, like I was walking through cement, and quick sand mixed together.

"E-Edward," I panted, as my stomach over took my thoughts.

"BELLA!" Edward shouted, as my vision went black. "ROSE! Someone, help!"

I could hear the door swinging open and girls shouting, and then something hit my head really fucking hard.

People began shuffling around me, but I couldn't see anything.

All I could feel was the tremors and heat flashes passing through my body.

I could hear myself throwing up, but couldn't really understand anything going on.

Then I blacked out cold.

----AUTHOR'S NOTES----

So there we go, Chapter 20!

-- Do you hate me?? :(

Poll for this chapter:
-- What do you think are the results? [Tricky, tricky]
-- What do you think is going on with Jacob now that he collapsed?

-- -- Please excuse if any research isn't perfect. I spent hours googling every single thing I could about this, so if anything is incorrect, then it SHOULD be minor and not as important.
If something is majorly wrong with my research, please pm me, so I can go in and fix it.
[Make sure to include your http://www[dot]source[dot]com in the notes, with that type of source, as I just showed in the example.]

-- Yes, triggers happen like that, with Bella thinking of James when she lashed out on Edward. :( It's a side-effect to PTSD.

-- Please note something: Any decision that comes from this has been made for a while now. Ridiculing chances won't change my opinion. Of course, I'll always read your responses
and take them into account, regardless of my personal view on the situation. But please don't be too crude with me if you don't like something. Thank you.
-- Also, like Jake said in the story... life doesn't really happen the white-picket fence way. And we all know that this story was not going to be a white-picket fence way, from the start. Just sayin'. ;)

-- Remember: This is part one of the events to come. The beginning paragraph is from the NEXT night. This is night one of the whole parental thing. The next day will be more explanatory, as the results are discovered, as well as Bella's journal, more with the Esme/Phil issue, and more with everything else. Not to mention, the results of the 1st paragraph of this.

Reviews are better than Phil and Edward vs Esme and Bella, round two! :D