Velox: Wow what kind of emo loser googles and researches coffins? Oh wait I did n_n That's one to put in the diary. Read and review plz kthxbai

The water boiler screeched an ungodly sound signalling the completion of the warming process. Max Tate glanced half-heartedly at the kitchen clock and saw that it was 2:35 am. Usually the teen would be awake at this hour because of strange screaming but the past few days had been different.

"Why do people die?" Max thought grimly. Maybe one day he would also figure out why fools fall in love.

The blond took a sip of tea and sighed at the infernal ticking—indicating the wasted minutes he had lost and others would never get back.

"Max! What are you still doing up?"

At the call of his name Max turned to see Rei standing by the kitchen door with both hands on his hips. The neko-jin's attempt to look menacing failed due to his bright blue pyjamas ornate with various cats. Although his Tokyo Mew Mew night clothes were also pretty bad.

"Why do you think?" Max answered gloomily. "I killed him Rei. Mr. Klaxton is dead because of me."

"He was 86 years old. The paramedics said it wasn't your fault." Rei reasoned. "Fred Klaxton suffered from frequent head injuries leading him to experience multiple headaches. That explains why he was always so cranky and grumpy. He probably read somewhere that coffee helped headaches thus the Starbucks thing."

"That beyblade was just another vegetable amongst the other usual list of things being thrown at him."

The Chinese and American bladers veered to see Kai helping himself to the prepared hot water.

"You need to put this behind you Max." Kai continued whilst putting a tea bag in a cup. "It was in the past. You killed Mr. Klaxton two days ago."

Max slammed his head unto the table as Rei frantically said, "Just go to the funeral and have a good cry!"

"There isn't going to be a funeral." Max stated. "Mr. Klaxton didn't have a friend or a close relative in the world! He was a mean loner just like he had said. His body should just be left in a field for the vultures to dance on."

"Oh. That's too bad," Rei expressed, "Hey Kai, is Tyson done with my Shaman King DVDs?" Kai shook his head at Rei's question as Max conveyed a look of disbelief.

"How could you guys be so callous?" Max said to his indifferent roommates. "Wouldn't you be upset if no one showed up to your funeral?"

"I think actually dropping dead would be a bigger issue for me," Kai replied.

The kitchen door swung open and the fourth champion entered the forum of intelligent discussion. Tyson was in his usual custom made Dragoon pyjamas but now with a brand new accessory—he was also wearing a widow's mourning veil. In black.

"Wow a slumber party," Tyson exclaimed, "I hope I'm dressed for it."

"WHY ARE YOU WEARING A VEIL?" Rei questioned. "You can barely stagger around with it on."

"This veil is handy for disguises. Like...when purchasing certain 'items' at a...store." Tyson explained inconspicuously as Kai slapped his own face in embarrassment. He fumbled and stumbled unto the seat next to the dual haired Russian and assured them saying, "Don't worry I can see fine."

"Who's the black guy?" Tyson asked pointing to Rei. Kai ignored his stupid whisper.

"We were discussing Mr. Klaxton's funeral," Max said.

"Oh yeah when is it?" Tyson inquired, "I wanna pay my respects."

"You mean you actually want to go?" Rei asked surprised. Tyson nodded and said, "Of course. Grandpa always said that no matter how wretched or despicable the deceased one may have been, those that are still living have to be courteous. We have to give that old geezer a funeral! It's the right thing to do!"

Tyson's last words struck the Bladebreakers hard as they all sat in contemplation.

"Besides," Tyson added, "Mr. Klaxton would probably haunt us from beyond the grave if we didn't do something."

"That settles it!" Max declared, "We're going down to that funeral home first thing tomorrow!" Rei and Kai looked at each other with the same level of helplessness before finally giving in.

"Fine!" Rei said while Kai nodded his head in reluctant agreement.

"As if you had a choice," Tyson said, "I'd have locked you up and thrown away the key!" Both Tyson and Max laughed heartily at the joke as Kai grabbed his cup of tea and stormed out of the room.

Rei sat in his chair nervously suddenly remembering Tyson's ownership of a pair of handcuffs and ignoring the burning curiosity as to where he obtained them.

The Bladebreakers gaped as they sat in the dreary confines of the Pfeiffer funeral home. The boys were assembled in the waiting room free to receive withering glares from the stingy secretary. They in turn were forced to stare at the unusual paintings of stick figures and striped wallpaper. Several other workers passing by gave the teens confused and questioning looks. Before Rei was ready to walk out and escape the house of dead people, a middle aged man with glasses dressed in a black suit walked in and asked "Is this the Granger party?"

"YES IT IS!" replied the entire team happy to finally flee from Medusa's gaze. The secretary noisily fixed sheets of paper as she pretended not to glance at the boys following the man out of the waiting room.

"We're so happy you took the time to speak with us," Max said as they were lead into another area. The group was greeted by an enormous array of caskets and coffins arranged accordingly. It was like being a vampire in a blood bank although none of the beybladers were too excited to go shopping.

"Yeah it's really nice of you to meet with us..." Tyson stated and looked at the man's nametag, "Mr. Feiffer."

"Oh no the 'P' isn't silent," The funeral director corrected, "It's pronounced P-feiffer."

"Ok...uh...Mr. P-feiffer," Tyson uttered awkwardly, "We have to plan a p-funeral for P-Fred Klaxton...gah...er...dah..FUNERAL!"

The funeral director ignored his embarrassing stutters as Tyson attempted to put his foot in his mouth.

"I see." Mr. P-feiffer acknowledged as he turned to stare intently at Kai. "Preparing for father?"

The Russian scowled his cruellest glare as P-feiffer quickly opted to take back his words.

"I'm sorry I thought with your gray hair and you being the tallest..."

"Hey P-feiffer how would you like a punch in your p-face?" Kai threatened.

"About the arrangements," Tyson interrupted. "This is actually for our neighbour." Mr. P-feiffer's expression turned from fear to one of deep earnest. "My sincerest apologies." He solemnly said.

"That's ok. We all hated him." Rei replied.

"How did he die?"

"He killed him." Kai said pointing to Max.

"Look we just need a respectable ceremony with a decent, quaint casket that will do Mr. Klaxton justice!" Max specified.

"Something charming. Something modern...something..." Rei suggested.

"Something cheap." Kai included bluntly.

"Well we have lovely new shipment of the Rosewood right here." Mr. P-feiffer directed them to a half couch magenta coffin by the corner of the room. "It has a sturdy base with an ivory finish, rust proof handles, as well as a durable casing. Ideal for..."

"How much?" Tyson interrupted.

"Really this Rosewood is of top notched quality. The finest casket around. Anyone would simply die at the thought of being..."

"We're not burying Batman how much?" Tyson yelled assertively.

"$3000"

The beybladers barely managed to even make a squeak.

"Kenny's glasses didn't cost that much!"

"That's an outrage! What do you got that's cheaper?"

Mr. P-feiffer aggressively closed the lid on the Rosewood and turned to veer and speak to his customers, "A funeral is a sacred and honored ceremony that binds together both the living and the dead. It is one that deals with emotional tidings, vows, regrets and most importantly goodbyes. It is the last chance an individual has to be received by the world he once knew. This is more than just a coffin! This will be your neighbor's sanctuary from here unto the afterlife!"

"I suppose we could just dump his body in a ditch. We wouldn't get in trouble everyone in town would probably help us." The Bladebreakers agreed in unison, completely disregarding Mr. P-feiffer's previous speech.

The funeral director sighed and walked towards a small little coffin barely noticeable amongst the selection of other models.

"The Pinebox. $100."

"DEAL!" Tyson exclaimed finalizing the sale. Mr. P-feiffer took out his schedule book and wrote in the Klaxton funeral reception. "Now can I put you in for Monday?"

"We're busy!"

"Hell-to-the-no!"

"Not Monday no way!"

"Sorry I forgot." Mr. P-feiffer realized. "Gossip Girl is on." The boys nodded in reply to his assumption.

"What about Wednesday?"

"Do you have a TV guide we can check?" Tyson asked. Rei waved his hand and stated "Wednesday's fine." Mr. Pfeiffer wrote in the details and closed the book when he was finished. The funeral director smiled and thanked the boys for their time as he walked back into his office. Amongst the silent army of coffins the beybladers were left to their thoughts.

Primarily, the hopes that the p-future p-funeral wouldn't phail.