|You Kill Me
Author: side-fish PM
Based on the CSI season 8 episode of the same name. A light perspective at looking on hypothetical murders of your most beloved ADJL characters. The twists. The turns. Who killed who? Missed me? Well, it's good to be back and I'm excited about this.Rated: Fiction T - English - Mystery/Humor - Rotwood & Spud - Chapters: 6 - Words: 6,474 - Reviews: 8 - Favs: 2 - Follows: 1 - Updated: 04-20-09 - Published: 01-10-09 - Status: Complete - id: 4782658
|A+ A- Full 3/4 1/2 Expand Tighten|
A/N: So this is it. The last chapter. Sorry for the really long delay, but I hope you guys enjoy this.
"So you just so happen to be walking to your car when you suddenly got hit by somebody driving another car. And then you fly dead all the way to the dumpster." Spud reiterated with some amazement.
"Genius don't you think?" Rotwood asked.
"Imaginative. That's a great way to die you know. A big finale to end your life."
"You mean poetic."
"So. Shall we continue?"
Coach Sackerson was now face to face with Spud with Rotwood's corpse in the middle. Sackerson wanted to say something but was trying to hold it back.
"Let it out." Spud said.
"NO SIGN OF SEXUAL TRAUMA!" He was laughing all around, but only he. Spud had this apathetic look. "Okay I get it. Can we examine the body?"
Sackerson begins opening the body and in the blink of an eye, processed the corpse. "Well,it looks like the vic went in a head on collision to a large object." Sackerson points to Rotwoods head. "There seems to be a pattern in the bruising. Must've been from the brick wall before falling toward the dumpster. Does Professor Rotwood have any enemies?"
"Are you kidding me?"
"Anything can happen you know."
"Well, I know there are a lot of students who hate Rotwood."
"What? I thought I was the most loved."
"Well, you asked." Spud replied. "Is that gonna affect who the killer is?"
"Not at all."
Sackerson then made a suggestion. "So the question is, which student owns a car?"
"Well, Brad already has his driver's licence."
Sun Park and Brad Morton were once again in the interrogating room. There were loud noises.
"You should get arrested more often." Park said as she took-off Brad's shirt. She did it while her lips was still in contact with Brad Morton's.
"Oh Miss Park. Oh Miss Park." He said. This time, he was enjoying it. "We should find a bed."
"What have you got against Brad Morton?" Spud asked.
"Nothing. Just a running gag." Rotwood explained. "So, was it Brad?"
"I think I need to see the car."
"Hmmm… interesting. Well the car was apparently found a few blocks from the incident. There's just one problem…"
Spud was now at the second crime scene, only it was filled with real policemen.
"The crime scene is not on your jurisdiction. NYPD already blockaded the area."
"Meaning that I can't process the crime scene."
"So, you're on a dead end."
"Oh no, I'm just getting started. Just because I can't process the crime scene doesn't mean I can look at it at the boundaries."
Spud looked over from the boundary of the crime scene. He noticed the driver door was open. He then realized something.
"It's not Brad. I know for one, he's not so good with the stick, so he drives his car with an automatic gear. This car has it manual."
"I'd say it again. You're on a dead end."
Spud was in deep thought, but he still had one trick behind his sleeve. "I can still look at the plate number of the car."
"Very well. After some analysis, the licence plate T74-5970 was found to belong to a businessman who parked his car four blocks uphill which is about 1200 meters."
"But you said the killer is only inside school. Apparently, that rules him out as a suspect." Spud was out of ideas. There seems to be not enough clues.
Spud went back to the crime scene. There seems to be nothing left. The case was going to be left unresolved as the killer was not found. "Can't find it… wait a minute." Spud looked at his surroundings. The car was said to be uphill. "Do I have to find out what the slope of the distance or are you gonna tell me?"
"The distance between the crime scene and the starting point. What's the slope?"
"About five degrees."
"Well that seems to explain everything Professor. Your killer can't be found since there is no killer. When the businessman left his car, he apparently forgot to pull the parking brakes. A slope of five percent is pretty significant considering the distance. By the time it reached you, it was probably traveling at around eighty to eighty-five kilometers per hour. You weren't killed, just very unlucky."
Rotwood looked at Spud rather impressed. "Wow, I can't believe you solved that."
"Well. It took some thinking. Wanna go again?"
"Sure." Rotwood then got himself thinking.
"You and Derceto. I know things are hard at the start, but, I think you just need to give her some time alone, you know. Get her some time to think. Then, maybe you can… you know… continue."
Rotwood listened to his words. He realized Spud was right. Not all is lost and maybe, when she is ready, they could continue their relationship.
"Let's play the game, shall we?" Spud asked.
Rotwood smiled. "Okay. Case 3719: The Murder in the Kitchen. We find Jake Long's body apparently chopped into a lot of pieces. His remains were grilled and apparently delicious…"