Hi! I actually started writing this about three months ago, after my friend LOST my copy of Twilight and I needed something to occupy my mind, so here is the result ;) I hope you like it. Oh, and I’d just like to say that 75 Things the Cullens Should Not Do will be getting an update soon, definitely by Saturday at the latest with stories of how the list came about so....yeah ;) enjoy reading!!

‘So who’s going to babysit Bella tonight?’ Alice asked in her twinkling voice. Rosalie stared determinedly at the apple on her plate, as though trying to phase out, while Jasper looked on uneasily. I had a cast on my leg now, and was on crutches, after my little ‘adventure’ in Phoenix during Spring Break and it still killed my body to move. I was taking prescription pills every hour or so, as Carlisle had managed to wind his way around the Hospital’s and State school’s rules for me.

‘I don’t think Jasper’s mentally up to it...’ Alice said thoughtfully. Her eyes glazed over Rosalie, as though that were a topic she wished to dismiss, and her eyes lingered teasingly on an eager looking Edward.

‘No, Edward you cannot babysit her. You’re coming hunting with me! We’ve been looking after her for two weeks straight, we both need to go hunting – for Bella,’ Alice added the last bit firmly, staring at me innocently. Edward sighed resignedly and Alice turned her eyes to Emmett, who was grinning widely, staring at me meaningfully.

‘Please? Please oh please oh please Edward!’

‘Emmett, last time you were left alone with Bella, you thought it would be good fun for you to both go on a bouncy castle – despite the fact her leg’s in a cast,’ Edward said sternly.

‘Oh, but I’ve never met Charlie, and I really want to; besides, that won’t happen again, me and Bella always have loads of fun!’ Emmett whined. I smiled; that was partly true.

‘Bella?’ Edward asked, turning to me with his eyebrows raised as Rosalie glared at Emmett.

‘Its fine; me and Emmett have fun,’ I reassured him. He was like the big brother I’d always wanted; except that I’d never imagined my brother to be so big, or someone who was in danger of drinking my blood.

‘Ugh; fine then,’ Edward said reluctantly as the bell rang, helping me up from my seat as he slid his arm around my waist to support me. Emmett grinned triumphantly and raised his hand for a high five, which I returned reluctantly.

***

When lessons finally ended, Edward walked me from the gym to his Volvo, where Emmett was waiting eagerly, grinning madly next to an almost cringing Alice. I guessed Rosalie and Jasper had already left.

‘Hey Bella!’ he cried excitedly. ‘This is going to be so much fun,’ he said, grinning mischievously. I groaned as Edward helped me walk around the side of the car, Alice watching me tentatively, a smile playing on her face.

‘Are you sure you’re going to be OK with Emmett?’ she asked, climbing into the back of the Volvo as Edward helped me into the front seat. Emmett slid in – weirdly graceful for such a big person – and he slammed the door shut, grinning like a maniac. OK, now he was starting to scare me.

Edward was already sat in the other seat before I could even blink, and he sped out of the parking lot. Before I knew it, the top half of Emmett’s body was wedged in between us.

‘What?’ Edward asked his face impassive as he watched the road much more carefully than usual.

‘Nothing, it’s just boring in the back with just Alice for company.’

‘Hey!’ said Alice chirpily.

‘Anyway, what’s up with grumpy old Eddie?’

‘Don’t call me Eddie,’ Eddie – I mean Edward – snapped. Emmett turned to me with his eyebrows raised.

‘It’s just because he knows that you’re going to want to run off with me in the end,’ he said cheekily, winking. I rolled my eyes as Edward made an odd, strangled hissing noise.

‘Shut up, Emmett.’

‘Ooh, I got to Mr Grouch.’

‘Isn’t it Grinch?’ Alice asked curiously.

‘Nah, that’s Christmas.’

‘Huh? Oh, Seuss.’

‘Doctor Seuss.’

‘Like Carlisle!’

‘Well done, Emmett.’

‘Ugh,’ I groaned, ‘your conversations move to quickly for me to stay focused on without getting a migraine.’

‘Wait, you don’t have a migraine?’ asked Edward anxiously, staring at me with only one limp hand on the steering wheel. Oh who cared; Edward could probably drive with both eyes closed and his hands tied behind his back.

‘No,’ I said hastily. ‘You worry too much.’

‘I have good reason to.’

By now, we were basically at my house. Edward pulled up softly but firmly on our driveway, being careful not to hurt my leg. I resisted the urge to roll my eyes again; he worried way too much.

‘Come on Bella!’ Emmett cried exasperatedly, clambering out of his seat and to my window, as though we had been waiting on the driveway for days.

‘Let her take her time,’ Edward said sharply. I actually did roll my eyes this time, and Emmett grinned.

‘D’you know what, I like Bella.’

‘That’s nice to know Emmett.’

Emmett grinned at me again, and obviously decided I was taking too much time, because he whipped away my crutches and seconds later I was in his cold, rock solid hands while Edward frowned at his brother. As Emmett started to move, I snapped, ‘wait, wait, let me say goodbye!’

‘And by goodbye, do you mean make out with my brother until the dawn of time?’ Emmett asked. I blushed as he let me down ever so slightly, so Edward could lean forwards and kiss me softly, as usual.

‘I’ll see you soon,’ he promised, as Emmett lifted me out of the car again, sighing.

‘Honestly, worse than me and Rose,’ he sighed dramatically. Alice laughed her high, wind chime laugh as she climbed gracefully and envyingly into the front seat, smiling.

‘Nobody on this planet is worse than you and Rosalie.’

‘Meh, whatever,’ Emmett said dismissively as Alice waved goodbye to me. Edward smiled at me one last time before the door closed shut and they disappeared down the street. Emmett bounded through my front door; suspiciously I hadn’t given him a key to get in with. He kicked the door shut as we entered, and put me down on the couch, just soft enough so my leg didn’t send me into another round of pain.

‘So....what ya want to do?’ Emmett asked his hands together as he rocked on his feet. I stared at him, wondering how someone could be so odd, even when they were a vampire.

‘Er, I don’t know... but I’m guessing you have a pretty good idea?’ I said warily. Emmett’s eyes lit up and he nodded, grabbing the remote and sitting down on the floor by the couch.

‘Let’s watch TV!’ he cried excitedly. I sighed warily again.

‘And what do you want to watch exactly?’

‘I dunno...I’m not Alice, for God’s sakes!’ Emmett sighed, flicking through the channels before finally stopping on some comedy show he liked called the Big Bang Theory.

‘This show rules,’ Emmett told me excitedly.

‘Great,’ I said sarcastically. Emmett turned around to me, his eyes wide with fear as he jumped up.

‘Oh my God, Edward warned me about this...’ he murmured. I frowned at him.

‘What?’

‘Apparently humans get very cranky when they’re hungry. Come, come now, food time!’

‘What? No – Emmett, I’m not –’

‘Food time Bell-Bells.’

‘Ugh. At times I really do hate Edward.’

Emmett lifted me up again, abandoning my crutches by the couch. I fought back a smile, however, as he walked me into the kitchen and plopped me down onto a chair by the table. He walked over to the refrigerator and pulled it open, his eyebrows drawing together as he looked from me, to the refrigerator, looking confused.

‘Emmett?’

‘Er, what do I do?’ he asked, a little desperately. I sighed; I couldn’t stand up, and he didn’t know what to do. God help me! Edward knew all about human food, Emmett obviously didn’t.

‘I’ll just have some toast.’

‘Er, right, OK...so I’ll need bread, right?’

‘Yes, very good Emmett.’

‘I know!’ he said happily, a bright grin flashing across his face as he pulled out a piece of bread and stood by the toaster.

‘Now put the bread, into the toaster,’ I said, as though I were speaking to someone who was mentally handicapped.

‘OK! Got it! Now what?’

‘Push that little lever down on the side.’

‘Erm, OK then,’ Emmett said nervously, pushing it down. He sat down opposite me and grinned, prodding my leg lightly.

‘Does that hurt?’ he asked curiously. I growled softly under my breath, he really did frustrate me at times.

‘No.’

‘How about now?’

‘No.’

‘Now?’

‘Ugh, no.’

‘Then why is it in a cast if it doesn’t even hurt?’

‘Because that is the point of the cast,’ I frowned. Emmett frowned too, prodding my leg gently once more before grinning proudly.

‘I knew that.’

‘Of course you did Emmett.’

‘Hey! I did. Ugh, you humans frustrate me.’

‘And you vampires frustrate me.’

‘Hey! Vampires rule,’ Emmett said defensively, as though I had blatantly insulted his favourite sports team. He turned away, muttering under his breath, ‘so then why else is she spending all of her time making out with my little brother?’

‘Oh shut up,’ I said, blushing scarlet. Emmett seemed to notice and he grinned.

‘Ha ha, you look funny when you blush.’

‘Er, thanks?’ I was unsure of whether this was a good or bad thing coming from Emmett. He was hard to take seriously.

‘That’s good, funny’s funny.’

‘Wow, really, I’d have never thought of that,’ I said sarcastically. Emmett frowned, raising his eyebrows.

‘Why with all the sarcasm?’ he asked.

‘I’ve been around you lot too much,’ I teased, smiling a little smugly. It seemed to take Emmett a moment to catch on, and when he did, he laughed loudly.

‘You’re funny Bella,’ he said. I raised my eyebrows; hardly anyone had called me funny before, and I wondered when my toast would be ready. All these pills had affected my mind.

‘When do you need your pills?’ Emmett asked, staring at the jar on the shelf. Charlie kept them out of reach, as though he were afraid I was a little kid and I was going to accidently overdose. He didn’t seem to realise that I couldn’t reach them on my own, Edward or Alice normally jumped up onto the table to get them. Like I could in a cast.

‘No idea; ask Edward, he practically has a timetable for me.’

‘Huh. D’you know what? I think Edward may be a little protective over you,’ Emmett said innocently. Again it was hard to tell if he was being serious or not; another of one of Emmett’s weird wonders. If you could even call them wonders, that is. It was Emmett, after all.

‘I did catch on,’ I said, rolling my eyes. Emmett seemed to have a way of making everyone frustrated but happy at the same time; huh, maybe that was his gift. Like and Anti-Jasper, sort of. Suddenly I smelt smoke and my eyes widened, as did Emmett’s as he span around in his seat to stare at the toaster. A small plume of dark gray smoke was rising from the top of it, and me and Emmett both just stared for a moment before Emmett jumped up.

I couldn’t see what he was doing, but by the time he had turned around, I saw that the toaster was now severely dented at the top, the toast was out, and the smoke was drifting out of the open window. Emmett grinned sheepishly and passed me a piece of the shrivelled piece of charcoal that was supposed to be my toast. I raised my eyebrows and he put the toaster back down, slipping what looked like a screwdriver into his pocket. Huh? I guess the Cullens will always continue to surprise me.

‘Er, sorry?’ Emmett tried nervously. I glared up at him, took one look at my charcoal toast and dropped it onto the table, just as I heard the door rattle open. Charlie. What was he doing home so early? Emmett sat up straighter in his chair, looking very excited, while I just scowled at him. I had no idea how someone could be so excited to meet their brother’s girlfriend’s dad?

The Cullens are weird people.

‘Hey Bella,’ Charlie called from the hall. Emmett looked as if he would practically burst with excitement at any minute, clapping his hands together silently.

‘Hey, Dad!’ I called. ‘What’re you doing home so early?’

‘Very slow day, I decided to come back early,’ Charlie replied. I heard his footsteps draw closer, and he appeared in the kitchen, smiling at me wryly, and frowning as he saw Emmett.

‘Er, dad, this is Emmett Cullen – Edward’s brother,’ I said, smiling slightly at how Emmett was now bouncing in his seat. Charlie seemed perplexed – as though the two Cullens had been enough, but he smiled at Emmett all the same.

‘Nice to meet you Emmett.’

It seemed that Emmett couldn’t stop himself any longer. He jumped up and hugged Charlie quickly before grinning at him.

‘Hi. I know we’re gonna be great friends,’ Emmett said plainly, nodding innocently at Charlie. I stifled a laugh; believe it or not, this was sort of how Charlie’s introduction to Alice had begun.

‘Erm...’ Charlie started awkwardly. He looked confused for a moment, but he seemed to clear the last twenty seconds from his mind as he turned back to me.

‘So where are Edward and Alice?’ he asked. I paused before answering, but Emmett beat me to it.

‘They have extra tutoring after school.’

Charlie’s eyebrows shot into his hair. Great, so now he thought I was dating some sort of idiot. I reminded myself to punch the living daylights out of Emmett if ever eventually became a vampire.

‘Tutoring? Edward and Alice?’

‘Ugh, no – I mean, yes – I mean, ow!’ I muttered, as I tried to move my leg. Emmett looked around wildly, as if expecting to see someone stood in our kitchen with a grenade gun pointing at my leg.

‘Oh, yeah, your pills,’ Emmett said. ‘Ugh, Edward’s better at this than me. He practically has a timetable after all!’

Charlie frowned and sat down in Emmett’s old seat as Emmett reached up to get down my pills. He didn’t need to stand on anything. Emmett reached back down gracefully for a very big person, and Charlie seemed too surprised.

‘Here you go,’ Emmett said, tipping two out onto the table and getting me a glass of water in less than five seconds. Charlie seemed just as dazed as he did when Edward let his guard down a little bit.

‘Thanks,’ I muttered, swallowing the pills with difficulty. Carlisle had to get the ones which tasted like rotten bananas didn’t he? Apparently they were better for recovery, but I’d have been just fine with the stupid strawberry flavoured ones.

‘They smell icky,’ Emmett said, wrinkling his nose. I laughed quietly while Charlie stared and stood up, walking into the living room to watch TV.

‘Hey, Bella, I know what we should do!’

‘What?’

‘Come with me!’ he said excitedly, picking me up. Like I had any other choice but to go with him; Charlie didn’t seem to notice as Emmett took me outside and into the backyard. Gently he placed me down on the grass – which for once wasn’t drowning in rain – and he grinned excitedly.

‘What?’

‘We’re going to play hide and seek!’ Emmett said excitedly. I sighed.

‘And how exactly am I supposed to find you with a cast on my leg and my crutches inside?’

Emmett sighed, as though I were holding him up for something very important, and disappeared inside, before reappearing besides me with my crutches. I helped myself up, holding onto a plant pot which held a withering, practically dead plant.

‘OK, now can we play?’ Emmett whined. I rolled my eyes and nodded.

‘Fine then.’

‘Yes!’ Emmett cried in triumph. ‘OK, you can count first. Count to fifty.’

‘OK, fine. Just don’t go running off like a mile – that may not seem a lot to you but to me that’s basically a marathon.’

Emmett sighed, and I knew that one of his hiding places was within a miles distance, but before he tried to set off again, I thought of something else.

‘And don’t go hiding in anyone else’s house, or garden – or the highway!’ I added warningly. Emmett wasn’t scared of me, I knew that, but I knew that secretly he was scared of the combined forces of Alice and Edward, and he nodded warily.

‘Fine? Anymore rules like ‘hiding places must be on earth?’’

‘Er, yeah, add that one in for safety,’ I said nervously. Emmett rolled his golden eyes at me and I covered my eyes hesitantly with one hand, while the other supported my leg with the crutches.

‘One...Two...Three....’

Knowing Emmett, he had probably found some kind of excursion to the rules I had just set him. He had probably gone about an inch from the mile radius, or he had jumped and grabbed hold of a plane... OK, maybe that’s pushing it a little bit, but this lot always surprised me.

‘Nineteen...Twenty...Twenty One...’

I hadn’t played Hide and Seek since I was about seven...and even then I was terrible at it. I could never find anyone, and I’d end up giving up miserably, or when I was hiding, I’d always stumble out of my hiding place, or get stung, or something like that and I’d give myself away.

‘Thirty Eight...Thirty Nine....Forty...’

Of course playing with a vampire was hardly going to help that record. I hadn’t heard Emmett at all since I closed my eyes, and I considered briefly for a moment the fact that he had just gone home and left me here standing like a prat, but I knew Emmett could never do something like that. And besides, like I said before; he’s scared like hell of the uproar from Edward.

‘Forty Eight...Forty Nine...Fifty!’ I cried, opening my eyes and looking around as fast as my stupid feeble human eyes could look. There were no awkward or suspicious movements. I groaned, this was going to take me ages.

I looked around as I stumbled forwards before taking another swing at the ground with my crutches.

‘Emmett?’ I called out, although I knew he wouldn’t answer. I sighed and looked into the forest. He had to have gone in there. What was it Edward had once had me promise him? Don’t go into the forest alone. Oh well, Edward, I thought, I’m going to have to break the promise.

I walked in softly, my crutches trailing on the leaves as I span around at the tiniest noise. God I hated Emmett...

I hit a tree with my crutch as I passed, and I tripped, sending myself flying to the ground. Typical. I put out both hands to ‘stop’ myself, and I mainly missed further injury to my leg, yet it still burned ridiculously. I groaned.

‘EMMETT!’ I snapped loudly. I almost had a heart attack as he seemingly dropped from the sky – although, I reminded myself, it had probably just been a tree.

For some mad reason, I began to laugh. ‘I....hate you!’ I choked out in-between laughs. Emmett grinned at me, pulling me up onto my feet and giving me my crutches back.

‘Apparently the feelings mutual with the rest of the family,’ Emmett sighed. I laughed softly.

‘So, another round?’ Emmett asked eagerly. I raised my eyebrows, but nodded when he turned his face onto puppy dog mode.

*

Two hours later, there had been countless rounds of hide and seek, none of which I won. Of course Emmett just traced my scent to find me, while I just ended up looking up into the tree tops to find him. Of course I never did, he ended up just jumping down and scaring me out of my whit’s half the time.

Eventually Charlie came out to find us. I was a hundred and ten percent sure that he thought Emmett was a complete nutter – I thought he was too, to be quite honest – and he brought us in to eat. He had taken to getting take outs for food lately, or trying his hand at cooking which was definitely not good for anybody’s health. He didn’t seem very surprised when Emmett denied the pizza – he had gotten used to Alice and Edward denying food. But the biggest surprise came when we were eating.

Charlie had taken his food into the other room, leaving me and Emmett in the kitchen. Emmett nudged my un-broken foot, and stage whispered, ‘hey, Bella?’ as though he thought all humans were deaf.

‘What?’ I asked, taking another bite of pizza.

‘I think your dad is lonely.’

‘Huh?’

‘Lonely. Spelt l – o – n – e – l – y. Lonely.’

‘I know the meaning of it; I just wondered what you meant.’

‘The definition of lonely is -’

‘I don’t care about the god-damned definition, just tell me!’

‘Oh, yeah, er....what was I talking about again?’ he asked mockingly, scratching the side of his head. I glared at him and he rolled his eyes.

‘Boy, Edward was right, you have a temper.’ I just carried on glaring.

‘No! I think we should make Carlisle and Charlie best friends!’ Emmett said excitedly. I stared at him as though he were retarded – which, I reminded myself, he probably was.

‘Emmett, is that really such a great idea? I mean, Carlisle’s a –’

‘-Well if you can make out with one, how come Charlie can’t?’ he asked, and I laughed at how wrong in context that question sounded. It seemed to take Emmett a moment to realise what I was laughing at.

‘Oh you know what I mean,’ he said dismissively, waving one hand and looking remarkably like Alice for one short moment.

‘I’m going to call Carlisle!’ Emmett said excitedly, jumping up and pulling his cell phone out of his pocket. I groaned.

‘Seriously, this isn’t such a –’

‘Ssh!’ Emmett hissed, although Carlisle would have heard him if a plane had driven centimetres away from us.

‘Carlisle? Yeah, it’s me. Who else would it be?’

Emmett’s eyes showed shock all of a sudden, and then anger, which for some reason made me want to laugh.

‘No I did not lose her! No!’

I giggled softly and Emmett sighed.

‘See? You just heard her then didn’t you?’

I watched him on the phone, still smiling and on the verge of breaking out into laughter at any moment.

‘What d’you mean you didn’t hear her?’ Emmett hissed. I gave a small laugh again, and Emmett grinned at me thankfully, as though I had done it knowingly for proof.

‘See, I did not leave her in a tree. Why would I leave her in a tree?’ He rolled his eyes at whatever Carlisle had said. ‘Edward said I was what? Ugh, fine, believe your stupid perfect little Edward.’

I forced back another laugh, with my smile stuck on my face with no trace of leaving.

‘Oh he is,’ Emmett whined. He shook his head dismissively, as though trying to shake an annoying bee off, and then his eyes widened with excitement, obviously remembering his original intentions.

‘Carlisle! I need you to come round, now!’

I scowled now, my smile finally disappearing. Had Emmett really lost his mind completely?

‘No, I have not killed Bella – no, I’m too scared of you lot – no – no – oh but daddy!’ he whined, actually stamping his foot. I laughed again, and Emmett growled, throwing his cell phone on the floor and jumping on it, so it flew apart into tiny little pieces.

‘Well that was a waste.’

‘Carlisle’s anti-social.’

‘Or maybe he just has common sense.’

Emmett frowned at me, but soon livened up, picking me up and hurrying into the living room, where Charlie was. He sat me down on the couch and he sat himself down on an armchair next to me, grinning like a maniac. Charlie seemed a little perplexed; I had to admit, if it had been me, I’d have already gone into severe shock.

‘Hi Charlie,’ Emmett said smoothly, as though he had known Charlie for all of his life. Charlie frowned, but nodded.

‘Er, so, what’ve you kids been up to?’

‘We played hide and seek,’ Emmett said, in a higher voice than usual before Charlie’s words even registered in my head. Charlie raised his eyebrows and looked at me as I blushed.

‘Hide and seek? Sounds fun.’

‘It was!’ Emmett said eagerly. ‘I scared Bella way more times than she scared me. I think she’s been hanging around Edward and Alice too much.’

Charlie looked completely confused, and gave a small jerk of the head which I guessed was his way of saying he was confused.

‘Er, yeah, I guess so,’ I said awkwardly. Emmett turned to me, rolling his eyes in a ‘you could have done better’ sort of way. I rolled mine right back at him.

‘So, er, when are Edward and Alice coming back from their tutoring?’ Charlie asked, sounding even more awkward than me.

‘Not until really late. They’re not too clever.’

‘Ugh...’ I groaned under my breath. Was Emmett trying to make Charlie hate Edward?

‘Oh,’ said Charlie, frowning. ‘And so you’re Edward and Alice’s...’

‘Older brother, that’s right!’ Emmett said excitedly, as though this was the most exciting thing he had ever done in his life. Talking to Charlie – right, buckets of fun.

‘And you’re –’

‘-A Senior, uh huh.’

Charlie gave a small smile and Emmett practically bounced in his seat as he grinned at me.

‘So...have you met the rest of my family?’ Emmett asked excitedly. I felt the urge to hit him, but he was too far away and I’d just end up bruising my hand anyway.

‘Er, no, just you, Edward, Alice and Carlisle.’

‘You’d love my family!’ Emmett gushed excitedly. I groaned – louder this time – and Emmett silenced me with a puppy dog look, which even worked on his face.

‘I have another brother and sister too, you know,’ Emmett said knowledgably, nodding his head. ‘Jasper and Rosalie – they’re twins, and seniors too; I think you’d like them. And my mom – she’s nice too I guess.’

Charlie nodded slowly, and I glared at Emmett for a moment before putting on a smile for Charlie.

‘Well, er, Carlisle is a very nice person.’

‘I know, he is, isn’t he?’ Emmett mused, as though considering the fact himself. He seemed so out of place in our living room.

‘So, er...’ Charlie started, but I smiled and spoke over his stutters.

‘Cha – er, Dad, could you get me a drink?’

Charlie seemed glad of a reason to escape. He shot out of the living room and into the kitchen, mumbling under his breath. Emmett chuckled at whatever it was.

‘You are stupid,’ I muttered. Emmett grinned.

‘Exactly; I think I was changed differently to the others or something. Edward says it’s just that my heads so big that what’s left of my brain has got lost in it.’

I laughed lightly. ‘Well I agree with Edward.’ Charlie entered the room, holding a glass of juice for me. I took a sip and smiled at him thankfully.

‘Yeah well you would agree with the guy you make out with twenty four seven...’ Emmett muttered darkly. I choked a little on my juice. Charlie’s eyes widened a little in alarm.

*

An hour later, Emmett seemed to have given up ‘making friends’ with Charlie. Instead, he seemed to be focused on annoying me. When nine o’clock came and went, Emmett seemed to take that as his cue to, ah hem, and leave as fast as he could. I reminded myself to tell off him to Carlisle. And definitely Edward. And maybe even Alice, if I felt like doing the whole thing properly.

‘I’d best get going,’ Emmett sighed, standing up and sighing dramatically. I watched as Charlie gave out a small sigh of relief.

‘OK,’ he said, standing up and excusing himself wordlessly into the kitchen. Emmett called after him in his booming voice, ‘I’ll see you tomorrow Charlie!’

I groaned as Emmett picked me up again, and I glared at him.

‘Get me my crutches!’

‘Why, do you not trust me?’

‘I at least like to think that if I get really annoyed with you, I can attempt to bash the, er, life out of you with them.’

Emmett laughed and grabbed them in one fluid motion as he ran me up to my room. He pushed open my door and put me down onto my bed.

‘Here you go ickle Bell-Bells,’ he said in cooing voice. ‘Is everything OK for you now?’

‘Ugh, you bug me at times.’

‘What! How could you say that about me?’ Emmett gasped in fake shock, looking around my room curiously.

‘Very easily, the way you’ve been going on,’ I warned darkly. ‘What about that whole making out twenty four seven thing in front of Charlie?’

‘Oh...yeah, that. I hoped you’d forgotten that.’

‘Do you seriously think humans are that dumb, Emmett?’

He smiled, as though he were considering that, and I threw a pillow at him, although it was as effective as throwing a feather at a solid brick wall.

‘Haha, good shot, Bella,’ I heard a soft voice say on my other side. I turned around to see Alice grinning, and a sheepish looking Edward. Emmett groaned.

‘Have you spoken to Carlisle?’

‘No, why?’ Edward asked suspiciously, edging closer to me. If my stupid damn leg wasn’t so banged up I could of actually moved to him.

‘Oh, er, no reason,’ Emmett said, sounding relieved and looking behind Alice fixedly as though someone was speaking to him intently there.

Edward stepped forwards beside me and took my hand while Alice rolled her eyes, although she was still grinning.

‘Edward was driving me crazy. Even crazier than usual – going on about how Emmett was a bad influence on her. And by the sound of what you told Charlie, I’m not really surprised he was.’

‘Hey, it’s true’ Emmett said in a low voice I don’t think I was supposed to hear. Edward frowned at Emmett and gave me a quick kiss, while Emmett covered his eyes, muttering, ‘d’you see my point!’

‘You’re so immature Emmett for someone, who has a wife,’ Alice mused, smiling wryly.

‘What about hunting?’ I asked, still sort of dazzled by Edward’s just general presence. He smiled his favourite smile, and I smiled back weakly.

‘We hunted enough for now,’ Alice said, her voice dry as she looked at Edward and me. ‘But we’ll have to go hunting again next week.’

‘Ooh, ooh, can I –’

‘You’re never babysitting again Emmett.’

‘Hang on, who even said I needed babysitting?!’