Chapter 17

I Have the Answer

“How…?”

Shiro seemed, confused, and I looked into his eyes, surprised and confused. “A heartbeat Shiro. You have a heartbeat!”

He blinked, seemingly surprised, and then realized. “That’s what it is? I didn’t… I had no idea…” He pressed a hand to his chest, massaging gently. “It had been hurting, but I didn’t know why. But how?”

I shrugged. “I don’t know. Something that Kurotsuchi did to you. Do you remember what happened when he cut our connection?”

Shiro thought for a moment. “I was rather… out of it at the time. I had just woken up from whatever it was that they gave me, I had trouble focusing…” His golden eyes narrowed in thought, and then he shook his head. “His zanpaktou… He did something with the zanpaktou. It was… painful.”

He shivered slightly, and I frowned, reaching out to touch his face. He automatically shrank into my touch, slipping forward against me, pressing his cheek to my throat. He was shaking, and I wrapped my arms around him, blowing softly into his hair.

“Easy, Shiro… Easy…”

“You are gone… I feel so empty without you…”

The feel of the heartbeat against my ribs was awkward and foreign, but I pushed it away as I held my Hollow to my chest. He shivered against me, his fingers finding purchase in the cloth of the shihakshou that I was wearing. I pushed myself to my feet, one arm slipping beneath Shiro’s knees and the other beneath his shoulders, lifting him with me.

He was light in my arms, thinner than I had remembered. I felt him shrink against my chest for comfort, and there was suddenly a sweep of cloth over his body, covering him from sight. I looked up into the cornflower blue eyes of Matsumoto, whom I hadn’t noticed come into the room. She smiled softly at me, carefully draping the dark cloth that she carried over my shoulder to fully cover Shiro’s shivering body.

I smiled back at her, nodding slightly in thanks, which she nodded to in return. As I left the darkness of the room I spotted Toshiro, who waved to me, gesturing for me to follow. I moved after him, and he led me out of the 12th division and towards the building that I recognized as the 4th.

Unohana stood just outside the building, and she took over control from Toshiro as we came close. She ushered me inside, leading me to a room near the back of the building.

“You may lay him there, Kurosaki-kun.” she said, her voice gentle and yet still concerned. I did as she directed, though Shiro shrank against me as I set him down. I hummed softly to sooth him, not moving far away as Unohana came forward.

Her reiatsu was a soothing light in the room, and I could feel Shiro’s tense body beginning to relax as her healing power moved through him. Her voice was soft as she asked him a couple of questions, gentle and warm.

Shiro stared at me throughout the process, his eyes roving over my face in a gaze that almost made me blush. I knew that I was doing the same thing, though; both of us trying to soak up the feeling of being with each other, of the feeling that we now had lost, the feeling of our souls next to each other. We could feel each other’s reiatsu, and while the feel of Shiro’s cold reiatsu was comforting, it wasn’t nearly the same thing.

“I’ve done what I can, Kurosaki-kun, all he needs now is rest, food, and drink. You should get some sleep too; I know that you’ve been having trouble.” Unohana’s voice was gentle, but firm at the same time. “It’s alright for you to take him back to the 10th division, but I would rather that he remain in bed for at least one more day, and that you bring him back to see me before the end of the week.”

I smiled slightly at her, nodding. “Thank you, Unohana-taichou.” I pushed myself to my feet, lifting Shiro once more. Now that he was a little stronger than he had been he fought me briefly, but a short growl in my throat made him go still.

I met Toshiro outside of the building, and the small taichou turned to lead me back to the 10th division. He didn’t say anything as we walked, but I could sense the question in his chilly reiatsu. Toshiro quietly led us to a room, nodding slightly. “You can rest here, Kurosaki…” he paused, glancing at my Hollow.

Shiro grinned, holding out a white hand. “Shirosaki. You can call me Shiro, just like my aibou, if you like. You helped us out a lot, he tells me.”

Toshiro smirked slightly at the sound of Shiro’s name. “Shirosaki. You two certainly have a sense of humor. And it was my pleasure to help you both; you’ve done so much for me in return, it’s the least that I could do. Now, I’ll leave you both to rest; you’re not doubt tired.”

With those words he turned and left, sliding the door shut behind him. It was only an instant after the click of the door when Shiro’s cool hands turned my face, stretching up to connect our lips. It began as a loving touch, but quickly escalated into desperate passion. I fell to my knees on the unfolded futon in the corner of the room, carefully laying my Hollow down on the mattress and lowering myself over him.

His arms wrapped tightly around my neck, pulling me forcefully forward and eagerly devouring my mouth. It felt like it had been so long since we had touched, since we had kissed, we could hardly find a moment to breathe, let alone detach from each other. He was cool and familiar, and I felt my nerves beginning to calm as his hands roved inside of my top to run over my chest.

“Oh aibou…” he breathed. “I’ve missed you so much…” He pressed forward at me, trying to push me over backwards and take dominance.

I grinned slightly at that action, holding his shoulders to the futon. “Oh no you don’t, you’re supposed to be resting, and I think that means no domination for right now.” I nibbled at his throat possessively. “I do believe that it’s my turn.”

He growled in response to that, but I felt the subtle tilt of his head to bare his throat to my touches. “Aibou…”

I moved carefully, gently, still vaguely afraid to hurt my beloved Hollow, although I was nearly shaking with the need to touch him. My hands shook as they stripped the thin yukata from his white body, my palms sliding over his skin. He was cool beneath my touch, just as I remembered him, his muscles tense with anticipation.

Only when our bodies were stripped and naked skin pressed against naked skin were we content to both lay there beneath the blanket, fitted together like a puzzle. We both wanted a joining, but we also knew that it wasn’t the place for it. We were in a too open area; our time together would have to wait.

Shiro lay with his ear pressed to my chest, his golden eyes closed in content, his arms wrapped around my waist. I had my cheek against his white hair, my eyes also closed as my fingers gently rubbed across the soothing cool of his shoulder.

“I love you…” I whispered with all the love that I could muster, pushing the feelings into my reiatsu as well.

He rubbed his cheek against my chest. “I love you, too, aibou.”

4 months later…

“So how was it, Shiro?”

My Hollow shrugged, draping his arms over my shoulders and settling his chin against my shoulder. “Not bad, considering. They just asked basic questions; I think they’re starting to run out of things to ask.”

I snorted at that one. “One would think that, considering they’ve been asking things for the past two months. After that physical exam conducted by Unohana.”

He nodded. “I guess they’ve started to get everything that they wanted to know. And to think, it all could have been this easy in the first place. Without all that pain.” I felt him shift and absently rub at his chest, where the faded scar was from the strange procedure that had given him a heart. Now he was just like me, in every way but skin and eye color.

According to Unohana, Shiro was identical to me in every way, down to his DNA sequence. Other than the fact that he was a Hollow, his DNA was identical to my own. He truly was my double in every way.

We now lived peacefully in the Seireitei, members of Toshiro’s squad so that the small taichou could continue to keep an eye on us as he was supposed to. He knew that we would be just fine if left to our own devices, so we hardly ever saw the white-haired shinigami, except when he had us perform some sort of mission. The two of us were perfectly content to remain in Soul Society; it was a better life for us there anyway. It was a place where we didn’t have to hide, where we could be ourselves without any fear.

We were happy with who we were and what we did, and so there we remained.

I felt gentle lips against my neck in a caress, and then Shiro’s voice in my ear. “Love you. And I promise, I’ll never let anything come between us again.”

Pressing my cheek against his, I smiled. “Love you too, Shiro.”

As always, I had my Evil Angel there to watch over me, no matter what happened.