Author: A Machiavellian Figure PM
Jasper is a manipulated and confused suicide bomber desperately seeking an escape. Can Alice save him from himself? Will she want to when she realises what he's done? A/J contains some violence/language in future chapters. Dark fic. ON HIATUSRated: Fiction T - English - Romance/Horror - Jasper & Alice - Chapters: 8 - Words: 14,712 - Reviews: 61 - Favs: 12 - Follows: 18 - Updated: 03-12-09 - Published: 02-01-09 - id: 4834710
|A+ A- Full 3/4 1/2 Expand Tighten|
Chapter 1 – All Over Soon...
A/N: This is my first ff so please be nice & R&R.
1. This is the story of a young suicide bomber, Jasper who has been ordered to blow up a crowded plane station in an attempt to blackmail the government but finds himself looking for a way out. What happens when someone hears his silent cry? Please note: All conflicts/opinions mentioned in this ff are purely fictional. They are the result of a 24 (the best TV show ever) marathon, an unhealthy amount of Fight Club (the best movie ever) and a Twilight obsession (needs no explanation) and they do not reflect my opinions so no hate mail please!
2. The illness Jasper refers to is schizophrenia otherwise known as multiple-personality disorder, I will attach a link with more details of his condition on my profile soon or you can look it up on Wiki :-). I have written Jasper's "other" personality in italics & that is who he is referring to when he talks about "us", I hope this clears up any confusion.
3. This fic contains some bad-language & will have detailed violence/sex scenes in later chapters so please don't read if you are upset by these things.
4. Finally, I don't own Twilight/24/Fight Club/anything at all because I'm not cool enough...
Boom. We stared at the bland carpeted floor of the plane, packed with the boring surplus population. Boom. We imagined the screams of horror from the suave businessmen, the naive chattering teens clinging to one another as a burning fireball engulfed them. Boom. We prayed that our sacrifice would end the power struggles of our cause against the twisted corrupted government. Boom. The light spilling from the flickering digits on the timer in our hand was reaching its climax, as we tightened our grip, digging our nails into our skin, deliberately scratching the surface. It's going to happen. You have made it happen. It would be over soon...
Our fingers drifted slowly to our chest where the explosive charges were surgically grafted under our skin before remembering Maria's orders: We must not draw attention to our self & the large amount of explosives & metal hidden deep inside our body. The weight of the bomb was uncomfortable– it made it all far too real. We could not distract our self from the terrifying reality that we had a mass-murdering device on our person, ready to detonate. Jasper... But it was necessary, it was all necessary. Maria had already explained that the government needed to be stopped before they could destroy all our freedom & condemned us to a life controlled by their rules, forcing us into submission. That's right...
Our high rank & devotion to our cause meant we were the perfect candidate for such a mission, it is an honour. We repeated the mantra silently. But the unfailing conviction was gone from our tone; somehow the arguments seemed weak & implausible without our Maria at our side. The words were lost in our mouth, without her to echo. Think of all she has done for us...
It was true, she had done a lot for us - so, so much - we were suffocating on an isolated farm in the Deep South. Our parents had been committed into a psych ward leaving us to care for our family of eight. We had dragged ourselves out of our crappy bed hours before the crack of dawn into the fields to work for twelve hours straight until our backs were bent and our spirit broken when we collapsed into our stone filled bed late at night. It was enough to make anyone crazy.
Especially a youth with a genetic history of schizophrenia & a thirst for attention. That was why we got involved with drugs. Our remote ranch was miles from the nearest police station, not that there was anyone there anyway, making it the perfect drop-off point. We got ourselves addicted to cocaine within the first month and within the second we had stopped bothering to buy food for our family. We were lost, sinking slowly into oblivion. With no-one else to talk to the other voice became louder and more talkative. We realised we liked cocaine but not our brothers and sisters; so we dumped them at an orphanage in Dallas and spent the money on coke.
It was a bad time for us.
We were desperate in our attempts to find the money to fuel our addiction and we were desperate in our attempts to escape from our life. That was when Maria found us. She visited us on the farm one evening in late January, joining Jack, our regular supply guy. Her long hair appeared ebony viewed through the shadows of the night and her eyes stood out from her pale ethereal skin, a chilling crimson which haunted our every waking hour. She visited us often, three sometimes, four times a week and captivated our senses as she sent us secret smiles and suggestive glances.
She approached us a month after our first meeting and offered us a chance to lead a different life, serving under her orders to bring freedom to all. It was all our dreams fulfilled at once, she was all our dreams fulfilled at once. Except she wasn't. Despite her subtle hints in the moonlight she expressed no desire to become lovers. Despite the confusion and disillusionment this caused us in the beginning we soon realised we didn't really want it. Our cause was our only love. She was not the woman whose soul mirrored mine, she was merely a crush. We altered our dreams to revolve purely around our cause and became a better soldier for it.
We had trained for moths in preparation for this; hidden deep is the shadows of El Paso. We had gone over the situation countless times anticipating every possible move of every possible person. Except they are not people are they Jasper... No, they are our prey. That's right...
We wanted to open my mouth to scream, to warn the nearby passengers to run, hide & escape the consequences of our mistake. Jasper... My eyes darted to the other passengers, my prey. No...The cabin was packed as people sat in their working-class chairs anxiously woneding if they would arrive on time, despite the bad weather conditions. Evil slaves of a corrupt institution. We straightened up earning us some admiring glances from the girls on my left, as we debated shouting a warning to them. Don't... They didn't deserve to die, none of them did. Our fight was with the government yet we were killing innocents. What had they done to warrant this?
At the far edge of our vision, uo in the luxury seating area we saw a beautiful red-haired boy turn to stare at us. We ignored him, turning our face away. We really didn't want to think about our victims; the pain and suffering we would cause their families and we could stop... No we can't, Jasper. We could shout... No we can't... We could tear the bomb from our body, freezing its countdown and save hundreds of people from becoming piles of ash & bones in a twisted metal fireball. Ha! We don't want to save these people. We were the ones who condemned them. But we could stop and free them from this fate. We don't believe in fate.
It was true. Why should we believe in a predestined path that results in a predetermined conclusion? When our life was doomed from the very beginning – both of our parents were in mental institutes with the disease that eat their brains & rotted their souls. Schizophrenia destroyed their life. Now it will destroy ours. Why should we believe in fate when all belief ever brought us was a terminal illness? And a suicide mission we had no desire to fulfil. Yes we do. It is our life...
We felt our breath hitch from the fear rising in our chest as the realty of our situation sunk in. Don't panic, Jasper. Remember - we are doing this for Maria. Think of all that she has done for us. We were going to die now, that much we knew, but the aching emotion in our chest transcended the physical pain. We were consumed by regret. No, we are complete at last. Not regret for the hundreds of lives soon to stain our soul, but for the waste our life had been. They are only lab rats, they don't posses souls. The guilt surprised us, for we had not felt this dissatisfaction before – our life was complete. The hole left in our world when our parents had succumbed to the disease they had fought for 20 years had been filled by Maria & her ideals of a better world. We had a cause, a passion, a goal that justified our existence. What more did we need?
The word filled our mind leaving us bewildered. We had been loved by our parents: regarded as the golden child of our large family. After their demise, we reserved our love for our cause, although Maria's silky hair & haunting eyes had claimed part of our heart for themselves. That part of our heart was dying, filled with flimsy emotions she would never reciprocate but it was the reason we were here today.
We had been content to sit back & watch enviously as others enjoyed their lives but Maria had shown us that we were destined for more. W had been picked by God, designed by Him for the sole purpose of self-sacrifice. Maria had known it as soon as she saw us. "Why else would you be so beautiful if not destined for martyrdom? What other reason is there for your disease if it is not to grant you greater wisdom - for you have two inner voices to guide you on the right path. My path." she had whispered to us. We had carried these words round like a talisman, letting them ignite our passion & fuel our desire. We had lost our restlessness & for the first time in our life we felt like we had belonged somewhere.
But the regret refused to subside, swirling round our stomach making us sick, as we glanced at the timer in our hand. The countdown began to speed up. ...02.00...01.59...01.58... We would have liked to have known love before we had died. Passionate, all-consuming love not the platonic philia adoration we felt for our shattered and unrecognizable family or the lust infused admiration we felt for Maria. No, Jasper, we have love for our cause and for our leader. That is all we need, it's all we will ever need.
We wanted to know our soul-mate & spend our life by her side. Cut it out Jasper. We wanted get off the tube & run as fast & as hard as we could until we met her. Wouldn't change a thing - you're committed, remember Jasper. We could... Stop! We can't back out now; we have a cause & a purpose. Yes, but... Maria. What about Maria? Don't we love her? We frowned internally. Maria was beautiful but we had always imagined our self with someone treasured us above anything else in the world & who would always put us first. Maria would always put herself first, the cause second and we were lucky to be in the top 10. That's the way it's supposed to be. We love our cause more than anything; it is our soul-mate. No stupid boring woman could ever replace our cause.
This was stupid. We had never given love or soul mates any attention before this day. Because they don't matter, we have already found our soul-mate. Why did it suddenly haunt us? Because we are panicking. Because we don't want to be here. It's the nerves talking Jasper... I don't want to do this. No! This is our life!
ARGHHHHH. We screamed silently as our brain tore itself apart. Don't disobey again Jasper; we don't want to die prematurely in such agony. We glanced desperately round the enclosed cabin, desperately seeking someone who could help us.
Our wild eyes were suddenly met by the warm gold eyes of the red-haired boy. Stop looking. We stared desperately trying to switch place with him so that we could get off at the next stop and not be responsible for the deaths of these innocent people. Stop looking! A shadow flickered briefly across the boy's face as he stood up and shuffled past the rows of seats towards us. Stop fucking looking! We quickly lowered our gaze as pain sears across the inside of our skull.
The boy pauses in his approach, standing as still as a statue, head slightly cocked as though listening intently despite being on the other side of the cabin. Then suddenly his figure blurred as she sped towards me...
But there was nothing he could do... It would be over soon. It would all be over soon.
Suddenly I felt an icy hand clamp down upon my shoulder...
Sorry to leave it hanging but I want to see if people are interested in this fic before continuing so please R&R - even if your comments are negative they are still appreciated.
I hope you enjoyed a glance into Jaspers mind...