It's the moment you've all been waiting for! It may have ended this year, but I am going to write a story featuring the 1st season, and a brand new 2nd season written by me. Ladies and Gentlemen! I give you, BOWSER'S KINGDOM! (note only for mature audiences)

Also, there is no way I can go ahead and do this without properly giving credit to the comic geniuses behind Bowser's Kingdom: pthouse and araskin. Just let me know how good of a job I do at writing the story version, all the dialog and events are theirs and the deserve more than credit. They deserve an award for their series, so seriously look it up!

Episode 1: Prolouge

Mario fought his way through Pleasant Path, jumping over some warp pipes, and entering a battle scene. He was up against a green Shy Guy, a Goomba, and a red shelled Koopa. He started with the Koopa, and as he ran after it, it hid in its shell, leaving Mario open to jump over it, and he kicked it at the Goomba. As the Shy Guy jumped down, another charged at Mario, only to be pumbled to the ground, and the green one was flung into the air using Mario's air strike jump. Mario landed on a couple of blocks and caught the Red Koopa from earlier, coming out of it's shell, so he flung it into the air, and it was a direct hit on the green Shy Guy that was now falling from the ground.

Some Goomba reinforcements finally arrived, and Mario just jumped on them like it was nothing, while some other Shy Guys took a chance to sneak up on Mario. Mario responded by simply charging at them, flinging them into the air, and he jumped onto the blocks and struck his classic victory pose.

On a cliff overlooking Mario sat a normal Koopa Troopa, and a Goomba. The Goomba turned to the Koopa and asked "What does Mario even want with us? Doesn't he already have enough of those damned coins?"

The Koopa replied as if he had no clue why Mario was attacking Bowser's minions "Well it's not like we stole the princess or anything…" There was a moment of silence until the Koopa, Hal realized "Oh yeah…that's right." He continued "What does Bowser even want with her! It's not like he's getting ransom money for it."

The Goomba, Jeff answered Hal's question with a disturbing answer "I heard it's for sexual favors!"

Hal groaned in disgust "Yuck!"

"No seriously! He could get any 2 coined whore in the Mushroom Kingdom…But only she'll do the one thing where she sticks her tongue, and puts her hand on the shell, and…"

Hal interrupted him and exclaimed in disgust "OOOOOH! NO! That's enough…"

"Well they don't call her princess toadstool for nothing!"

"Aww man! You make me sick…"

Jeff then complained "What can I say! I'm a Goomba, I'm a -bleepin- living mushroom!"

Hal really didn't care about Jeff being a Goomba and replied "So what! Who cares if you're a Goomba."

Jeff criticized Jeff's answer "What do you mean 'who cares!' I have no -bleepin- arms! I'm a -bleepin- mushroom!" Jeff wasn't all to happy now and he continued on "I had to go through my whole life picking things up with my mouth! It's gross…and dirty!"

Hal looked into the sky above, and he noticed an incoming object. He warned Jeff "Whoa! Watch out!"

Jeff jumped out of the way, as a Shy Guy fell next to a near by warp pipe and asked "Hey there buddy…You uh…you alive?"

Hal looked down at the Shy Guy and said "I think he's dead?"

"Yeah, you think so? You think he could've survived a fall like that?" The Shy Guy got off the ground, and he was indeed alive. "Oh…Well we were both wrong, were we!"

The Shy Guy asked Hal and Jeff in it's usual Disco Stu like voice "So? Why aren't you guys over, you know… Helping us?"

Hal replied "Yeah, you see…we were about to go over there, and you fell from the sky, and we got distracted…"

Jeff told him "Yeah, seriously. It's all your fault…Get outta here!"

"Hey! Look at that!" Hal was shocked to find out Mario had just got a Star, and he was now invincible to Bowser's Troops. As if wasn't strong enough! "Mario's got that music and flashing going on…You know what that means! He's got Star Power! You can't do -bleep- against Star Power!" Hal was now mad at Mario.

Jeff tried to get rid of the Shy Guy and said "Hey, Shy Guy. You wanna beat Mario?"

The Shy Guy replied "Yeah…I do!" He looked to his left as Jeff instructed him on his plan.

"You see that block over there? Go over and hit it!" As Jeff finished speaking, the Shy Guy went over and did as he said.

"Okay…So what…It's just a flower…" The Shy Guy hit the block, and it gave off a Fire Flower.

"Touch the flower."

"Okay… it's just a flower" As he touched it, his body was engulfed in flames and he began to scream a unrealistic cry "Oh boy…I'm on fire…Somebody, put me out!" He ran over to Hal and Jeff and he said "Why don't you fellas help me!" He began to run around in circles, trying to put out the fire, and he then jumped on the warp pipe. "Is there any water in these damned pipes? It burns like gonorrhea!"

As it jumped off, a Pirhana Plant popped out to greet Hal and Jeff, and yes, it was the famous Steve! "HI GUYS!"

Hal sighed "Hi Steve…"

In the background the shy guy could be seen running around shouting "Guess what! I'm on fire…and the only thing that'll put me out…is more cowbell!"

"What do you want Steve…" Hal asked, without any care.

Steve answered Hal "I heard you guys talking, and I thought I'd come over and say hello!"

Hal increased his tone a bit and replied "We don't wanna talk to you Steve! It's like… we're trying to have an adult conversation, an then you pop outta the ground, and it's like. HEY, STOP WHAT YOU'RE DOING BECAUSE STEVE'S HERE, Include him…-BLEEP- YOU STEVE, -BLEEP YOU!"

Steve obviously didn't care and Jeff tried to calm Hal down as he began to get all assertive "Hey, hey, hey, hey…Wait a second…I think that Shy Guy just put himself out?"

Hal looked over at the Shy Guy and replied "Yeah! I think you're right…"

The Shy Guy said out loud, as he was no longer on fire "It's a good thin I had to pee…really bad!"

Jeff then asked Steve a favor of his "Hey Steve. Light that Shy Guy on fire."

Steve loudly replied "OKAY!" He then spit a fire ball out at the Shy Guy, engulfing it in fire, once again!

It then shouted the same way it always talks "Oh no! I'm on fire again!" It continued to run around like it was before.

Hal reluctantly thanked Steve "Thanks, Steeeve!"

Steve gladly replied "Any time guys, Glad I could help!"

"Alright, now get outta here."

"BYE GUYS!" Steve went back down the pipe, and as he did, the Shy Guy finally burnt to the ground.

Jeff took not that it was now dead and said "I think he's dead."

"Yeah, probably. Nice Work!" As Hal and Jeff sat back to relax, Mario could be heard in the background shouting out to the troops, and still beating the hell outta them. "Man, I'm glad I'm not over there!"

"Yeah…We should get a raise for it!"

"YOU'RE GETTING PAID!" Hal unfortunately wasn't getting paid while it was a mystery why.

"Yeah, we get like 3 coins an hour." Jeff replied.

"YOU GOTTA BE KIDDING ME!"

"Seriously, we get great dental coverage!"

"Son of a bitch!" As Hal finished, a ghostly Shy Guy floated over to them.

The Shy Guy from earlier now wanted vengeance and he said to them "I'm a ghost now! BOO!"

"Yeah, You are…Look at that!"

Jeff insulted the ghost Guy "Still not scary!"

"Yeah, well it's time for my comeuppance! Hey Mario! The Princess is over here!" At the sound of 'The Princess' Mario flew to the air, as the Shy Guy disappeared. He now had a cape and he flew over to Hal and Jeff.

"That asshole!"

"OH -BLEEP-!" Jeff screamed, as Mario divebombed them and slammed them into the ground.

Mario looked for Peach and he noticed only Hal and Jeff were there. He said "Mama mia! There is-a' no Princess ova here! Oh well!" He flew off, leaving Hal and Jeff there. After an hour Hal and Jeff were gone, and they went to a new location.

If you've never seen Bowser's Kingdom in the next episode Hal and Jeff continue their adventures and don't worry they weren't killed by Mario. In that episode they come across the Shy Guy Union, and they learn how much better off they are. Like I said, credit goes to pthouse and araskin.

Just so people know, the next chapter of Of Glitz And Glory is still in production. It'll be another week before it's up.