Pseudo Equilibrium

Prologue

“Why did you try to do it?”

She looked up from her shoes and into the eyes of her psychiatrist. The question was always the same.

“Why did you try to kill yourself?”

“I didn’t.” She replied, and smiled. “I was just…having fun.”

It had just been a spur of the moment thing. In all honesty, had she known that people would have reacted so violently, she would probably never have done it. Or maybe she would have. After all, it was kind of nice to have her mother pay attention to her for once.

But…really…at the moment she hadn’t been thinking. About any of those things.

At the moment, she had been comfortably dizzy, reveling in the acceleration of the motorcycle beneath her…she had been…busy…flying.

“Fun?” The woman spat. “Fun? You think this is a game?”

She shrugged.

“I don’t think I’ll dignify that with an answer.”

“Get out of my office.” Those words weren’t new to her either. She chortled at hearing them and stood from her seat. “I don’t care whose daughter you are. I refuse to treat you.”

The girl’s lips curled upward.

“I don’t need to be treated.”

She walked out of the office.

“Why did you do it?”

It was always the same question. It didn’t matter how many times she went to a psychiatrist. It didn’t matter who it was that talked to her.

It was always the same question.

“What did it feel like?”

For the first time while sitting in a shrink’s office, Fate Testarossa didn’t smile.

“It felt like I had finally reached a moment when I had total control…” She said slowly, dragging the words, caressing them with her tongue, “…only to have it wrenched away from me completely.”

Slate blue eyes bore into hers.

And closing her own, she continued, “It was like being the dominant partner during sex, only to have the tables turn.” She opened them and crossed her legs, sending the woman across from her an intense look. “And then there’s nothing left except euphoria.”

A/N: I should -quite possibly- get stoned for this. And not the nice drug kind where you apparently see unicorns and magical beings.

But yeah. Anyway. You guys should probably not expect another update for this for a while. You know. Since I'm actually trying to follow BPHaru's advice and focus on Melody. XD

Does anyone else think crazy!Fate and psychiatrist!Nanoha make an uber hot couple? 'Cause I do.

Right. Well. Ciao! Oh, and expect another update for Melody really soon. Like, seriously. I'm not lying. XD