HAPPY BIRTHDAY KANDA! : D

ANNOUNCEMENT: Welcome to the LaviYu festival, lasting from 6th of June to 10th of August, which circles around the main date, the brand new chosen LaviYu Day, July 8th! Our fandom is definitely worth to have an annual celebration, so don't bail out and join in with the legion! Please read more about this on Live Journal (remove spaces before inserting the link):

http : / community . livejournal . com / rabiyuu / 109560 . html

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AN: Thanks for the feedback guys! I tried to update faster this time, no need to tell that it failed miserably. I guess I just let RL get the better of me. Oh well - better later than never, right? (hides in shame)

And to those who wanted to see more of the game!Alice...I'm sorry, but I'm not basing this fic on the game completely. XD I just took the Wonderland=hallucination-inflicted-by-madness concept from it. XP So yes, Kanda's gonna be stuck with his 'Vorpal Blade'. Just because. :3

...And if Digi doesn't chew out my Lenalee, I'll consider my month complete. : O

Warnings for chapter: Cruelty of Victorian Age hospitals, numerous mad relatives and... I apparently suck at writing Allen? D:

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Chapter VI : Pale Realm

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Lavi fidgeted.

He got up from the chair, walked back and forth for a bit, then sat back down again, waiting for the office's door to open. He should have figured it wouldn't be over so easily. He shouldn't have started to believe everything had sorted out. He should have expected this.

Oh well.

A graceful woman in a white coat and with a long ponytail - the Director's secretary - opened the door. "The director is going to see you now, Dr. Bookman," she announced, her golden eyes glinting a bit mischievously. She seemed to be trying to catch Lavi's gaze, but he avoided her look, pretending not to notice the light seductive smile on her face.

"Thanks Lu," he sighed and got up, stuffing his hands into the pockets of his coat and then taking it back out again.

"What's up with you?" she asked, looking at him, now with a light frown. "It's a rare sight to see you this jumpy."

Lavi shook his head a bit. "Just a bit of an unpleasant matter," he muttered. "I guess I'm a bit nervous. It'll be fine." As he walked through the door, he heard Lulu asking if it had to do with his favorite patient, but he pretended he didn't hear.

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"I've heard one of your little patients was ... misbehaving," the Director said in a particularly sweet tone, which didn't mean anything good. His granddaughter giggled, she was sitting on the side of the director's chair, having draped herself on his shoulders. "I'd like to hear what you have to say about this, doctor."

"The sanitars weren't minding the simple sanitarium rules," Lavi answered in a blank, matter-of-fact tone, though he was mentally pulling his hair out out of nervousness. "They should have known better. Doctor's work isn't a game." As he said the last line, he glared at Road, who didn't seem to mind at all and giggled again.

She then got up and skipped over to Lavi, twirling around him in a playful manner before grabbing onto his arm to keep her balance and leaning to the side to look at his face while standing on one leg, "You wouldn't say 'no' to me, Mr. Bookman," she chirped.

Lavi's face stiffened further and he didn't move, looking over at the Director whose smile grew more menacing.

"Come back here, Road," he said sweetly before focusing on Lavi again, "That is true, and that's why further measures weren't taken. I'm quite sure it didn't happen without your inability to do your job though, Bookman Jr. You should thank your grandfather that you're able to keep your job." Lavi's heart skipped a beat. "If this repeats, I might reconsider it. You may go."

The redhead marched out of the office so quickly that he didn't even have time to reply to the secretary's 'Well, how did it go?'

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Lavi was sitting next to Kanda's bed, watching him. It was night and his shift was long over; he should have been sleeping by now but he just didn't want to.

"Why did you have to go and get yourself into trouble Yu," he muttered, watching the silent man with a sad expression. "I'm scared. They have their eye on you now." He sighed and rested head on hand.

Kanda looked somewhat troubled, though he didn't move. It seemed like his blood-flow was suffering from being tied up, and the red-haired doctor frowned. Well, no one but him and Lenalee normally walked in here now...

Lavi looked at him, quickly peeking around, then slowly removed the straight-jacket and set the black-haired boy's arms free. "You're not some kind of animal nor threat," he muttered as he stuffed the cloth into one of the drawers. "If anything, I'll take the blame, but I can't bear to watch you like this anymore."

Kanda was sleeping, his expression now looking a bit more peaceful.

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"Brother, please let go." Lenalee was standing in the hallway, one hand on the food cart's handle, looking slightly embarrassed. And the reason for that was her brother, who was practically laying on the floor hugging her knees and crying waterfalls of tears.

"But - but - but - LENALEE! Didn't you hear what happened? What if you get hurt?" he wailed.

Lenalee sighed. "It's Kanda-kun, brother," she said, sounding mildly irritated, "He can't hurt me."

"You're right, Lenalee," Komui sobbed, finally getting up. She did have a good point...knowing them way back, that is. But nothing was how it used to be. "But he's not quite himself anymore, you need to be careful-"

"I'll be fine."

The young woman had strangely determined look on her face. She had really become strong-willed, compared to the times when her brother wasn't around.

"Don't worry."

Komui was about to say something, but he saw Lenalee's reassuring smile, the one that she'd always give him when he worried too much, and he couldn't help but calm down. He nodded lightly. "I'll go work then," he said silently, giving his sister one last hug and finally stepping away from her.

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Lenalee pushed the cart through the hallways, stopping by the wards that were assigned to her and doing her job. She had to practically stuff the food into patient's mouths most of the time, carefully that they wouldn't choke, and see that they'd swallow it. It wasn't very pleasant, then again it wasn't too bad either. She was helping people, and she knew it was the right thing; however none of the strangers really made her feel like she did what she wanted to. Maybe she didn't want to help people as much as she wanted to help those she knew.

It was strangely silent in the hallways for this time of day, and she briefly wondered how many more patients were let out or have died. It made her slightly depressed. Of course, considering that in most asylums they were treated like caged animals - depending on the nature of illness - and people were let in to stare at them for money, maybe death wasn't such a bad thing. Luckily, here this fashion didn't seem very popular, there barely were any visitors of any kind actually and that was quite depressing, but still there usually would be some kind of commotion around noon.

She turned into the hallway where Kanda's ward was and sighed silently. "Will you ever come back?" she whispered more to herself than to anyone else, remembering times when she last saw her cousin and he was practically...happy, if you may use that word on him. "You have to!"

The rest of the hallway she walked through in silence, and just when she stopped by the door, a voice stopped her.

"Lenalee!"

She turned surprised and saw a white-haired man walking towards her quite quickly. His expression was a bit guilty.

"Can I talk to you?"

"I'm working, Allen-kun," she answered with slight surprise which was changed by concern, "Did something happen?"

Walker took a deep breath. "No..not really," he said quickly. "It won't take long, I promise."

Lenalee tilted her head a bit. "Sure then What is it?"

Allen bit his lip lightly, he had rehearsed the wording all the way to this corridor yet now he had no idea how to phrase it properly. He had gotten upset with himself upon realizing that he was selfish by enjoying Lenalee's company so much that at times he would almost stop wishing for her quick getting-well. And he couldn't stand that because he wished the girl all the best wherever she wanted to be, yet some side of him apparently didn't, and it was horrible. He wanted - no, needed - to apologize, even though Lenalee never knew about this struggle of his and was already completely fine. And now he in fact understood that it was terribly hard to apologize for something that another person doesn't know about.

He finally raised his eyes to look at her.

"I'm sorry for being selfish," he said, bowing his head in apology. A small voice inside of his head said something about Lenalee working in the hospital as long as Kanda was there, but he mentally murdered it, determined never to do anything that could hurt the girl. "It will not happen again."

Lenalee blinked a bit. "It's okay... Are you feeling alright?" she asked with a hint of concern as the sanitar seemed somewhat pale for a moment and mechanically touched his head.

"Yes, I'm fine," Allen reassured, though in fact he didn't feel well at all. First of all, he was really upset with himself for the way he dared to think, even if for a moment. And secondly... Most of the other sanitars had unexpectedly taken a break so he had to do all the work and it was his third day without sleep, plus he had to work in a camera with tranquilizing gas. But he knew that he had to talk to Lenalee as soon as her shift started, so he waited for her after finishing his work instead of going to bed. "Don't let me interrupt you," he said with a light smile, motioning towards Kanda's door and quickly walked away. His vision blurred a bit as he walked.

Lenalee looked after him with worry.

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The Chinese woman cleaned off Kanda's face after she finished trying to make him eat his meal, and sat next to him. Her dark eyes looked somewhat blank as she looked at his still form, her thumb absently stroking his hand. He was like a brother to her

"Why did this happen to you?" she asked silently, fighting back tears. Crying won't help anyone, she had decided, yet at some moments the promise was so hard to keep. She closed her eyes for a moment and took a deep breath. It seemed to help her calm down a bit, and she looked back at the young man sadly. "Kanda-kun."

He didn't answer, but his expression seemed to gain a barely noticeable painful tone, and Lenalee frowned with concern.

"Wake up.." she whispered, sighing and lowering her head to the man's arm. "Please wake up, Kanda-kun. Please wake up."

"Kanda-kun! Have you seen Brother?" Little girl's teary and hopeful eyes were locked on him, and he knew he had to act older at the moment, though he was barely seven.

"No, I haven't." He stepped away from the bunny-shaped snowman and looked at Lenalee with a light frown. "He can't be with you all the time, you know."

The girl's lip quivered, and Kanda widened his eyes a bit.

"Wait-no-that's not what I meant!" It was so surprising, the girl who could kick all the neigbors' boys' asses, could become completely vulnerable if only her brother wasn't around. Kanda usually managed to fill Komui's shoes, but not for long, and, apparently, not every time.

"B-but it's my birthday today," Lenalee sobbed and glared up at her cousin.

"You're not getting anything until afternoon so don't look at me."

"I don't want presents, I want Brother!" the girl insisted, folding her arms and flopping down on the snow. "I'm not going anywhere until he gets back!"

Kanda sighed and shook his head in disdain, Lenalee could be so stubborn sometimes. "You'll catch a cold." The girl simply pouted and looked away, tears still running down her red-from-cold cheeks, and Kanda grudgingly crouched down next to her. "He'll be back soon," he reassured, placing a comforting hand on Lenalee's head and attempting a smile which looked more like an unnoticeable half-lip grimace. "Come on now. Get up." She slowly complied and buried her face in Kanda's scarf, wiping her face off.

"Oh-Lenalee! You're awake already?" came a familiar voice from the gates, and when Kanda turned, there was a Chinese teen, and he was holding a package.

"Brother!" Lenalee beamed, letting go of Kanda to whom she was clinging at the moment and running up to him. Kanda snorted silently. "Where have you been?"

Komui scratched the back of his head awkwardly, "I wanted to get you a special present.." he said, hugging his sister and then lifting her up.

"Oh - that's where you were?"

"Smooth move Komui, you could have told her you'd be out."
"Ah, sorry!"

Lenalee widened her eyes as she felt something gently stroke her hair, and as she straightened up she realized that Kanda had in fact placed his hand on her head as if telling her not to cry. His look was now turned at her, but apparently it was a moment's clearance as his gaze seemed unseeing once again.

"Kanda-kun?" she asked but received no reply.

When she told Lavi what happened, he didn't seem at all surprised.

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A few days passed once again, and one quiet afternoon, loud knocking on the asylum's outer gate could be heard. Lavi stuck his head out the window with a dark frown.

"If that's another one of those freaks who thinks this is the zoo-"

The doorman waved up at him. "Sorry doc, the Director wants to let them in as well."

"Well to hell with you too, Doug," Lavi shouted back. He hated it when people called him 'doc', it was just so... unappealing.

Doorman sighed. "I don't like them any more than you do," he said now seriously and opened the small window in the gate.

Lavi perked up, trying to hear what they were talking about, but it was too far away, though judging from the voices at least one of them was shouting. From the few words he could make out, the young doctor recognized a light French accent.

He was quite surprised when the gate finally opened, and a middle-aged man frantically ran through the yard and into the lobby.

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"Is that it?" Kanda asked the White Rabbit as they were now sitting in a clearing, next to a small lake that was perfectly round. For a moment he thought he saw Lenalee's face reflecting in the glass-like surface. It was looking down at him sadly, her lips silently moving. He narrowed his eyes. 'Wake up.' What? This couldn't be. Lenalee...she was gone, wasn't she? He frowned a bit and reached out to touch her face, but as soon as his fingers touched the water, the image disappeared in ripples.

"This is the Well," the Rabbit explained. Kanda raised an eyebrow.

"I can see that, Rabbit. What about the well?"

"It's not an ordinary well."

Kanda felt himself twitch lightly. "Great. Now can you tell my why did you bring me here and what this well or whatever it is has to do with anything?"

Rabbit widened his single eye and looked at Kanda as if he had forgotten he was there. "I," he announced solemnly, "will tell you the Story of the Well."

There was silence for a while. Kanda coughed. "You can start, you know."

"Long, long time ago, it was an ordinary well," Rabbit said, looking up at the sky sadly, its ears flopping down.

Kanda twitched more but didn't comment. He stayed silent, while Rabbit kept staring up in the clouds. Several times Kanda was about to say "Nice story" and change the subject, but he expected there had to be something more to that.

After what seemed an eternity, the Rabbit spoke again, this time his voice sounded a lot like the red-haired man's that Kanda saw in his hallucination not long ago. "You know what, I'll just cut the bullshit and tell you what it does," he said.

Kanda nearly fell face-first into the lake. He forced himself not to kick the idiotic Rabbit into the middle of the water body, and turned to him, one corner of his lips turned up however it was twitching. "You know what, that's a damn great idea. So what is it?"

"It's like a mirror between worlds," Rabbit said unexpectedly seriously. "I already explained you what this world means, and what will happen to you if you don't complete your mission here. However..." his eyes gained a mischievous glint, "that doesn't mean you can't peek into the other one from time to time. Actually, you did that already."

Kanda's eyebrows shot up. "What?"

Rabbit snickered amusingly, and sniffed the water. "Yu, remember me?" he asked, once again in the exotic redhead human's tone, looking up at the Japanese.

The young man was about to seriously snap when he saw the water's surface and froze. In the glass-clear surface, the man from his dreams was reflecting, his lips saying the exact same words before the image dissolved into ripples once again and left Kanda staring at the Rabbit utterly confused and in shock, feeling something clench his heart in a manner he couldn't remember ever experiencing.

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"Yu, remember me? I brought you a visitor."

The red-haired man smiled lightly, looking at Kanda who gave no response. He casually ran fingers through the black-haired boy's fringe and sat down. A chair next to him was left empty.

A tall, gray-haired man squeezed himself through the door, crying waterfalls of tears. It was the boy's Godfather, Froi Tiedoll, who apparently got to England from Japan in a record time. God knows what vessels he used and how much money he spend. "My baby!" his first sobbed-out words were as he rushed towards Kanda and grabbed his hand, pressing it to his wet face. "Why didn't I come here before? If only I knew!"

The doctor watched quite dumbfounded, though at the same time he was happy that Yu had someone to care about him. ...Even if it seemed a bit too much.

Kanda didn't move however, though his lips seemed to open for a moment it wasn't clear if he said something or not.

"Such a horrible, horrible tragedy," Tiedoll wailed, burying his face in the black-haired boy's blanket. "Yuki...Yoshihiro...Sayuki... Li and Eleena too..."

"Mister, you're dirtying the sheets..." Lavi muttered, frowning a little bit.

"It's a miracle you survived, Yu-kun... Why didn't anyone let me know before, you had to be here all alone, and how did you end up like this, oh my heart! I don't think it can take this..."

"Mister Tiedoll...please.."

"Oh Yu-kun, please forgive me, I'm going to take care of you now!"

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When the visitor hours ended, Lavi practically had to drag Tiedoll out of Kanda's ward. The man was still sobbing, though he seemed a bit calmer by now.

"Is it really not possible to take him home?" he asked.

Lavi shook his head. "He's under treatment..." he muttered. "You can come to visit him though. He's been showing signs of progress, when he improves further you can continue the treating home." To him it looked like someone else said the words, it sounded so distant.

"I'll rent a room in town, for now," Tiedoll muttered, rubbing his nose with his sleeve and removing his glasses to clean it off, "so I can come here to help look after him."

"Please sign these papers that you are his official tutor." Lavi's tone was blank but as he held out the document and a pen to the man, he felt his inner self jump around triumphantly in a manner that definitely didn't fit a qualified doctor.

Afterwards, Tiedoll went to meet up with Komui and Lenalee, while Lavi practically ran to his office, clutching the documents that proved Yu's now important place in society. One of the identical documents he placed in the patient's file, while the other he slipped into the Director's office later that day, earning quite a bitter look from him, and then a simple dismissing nod.

"You're safe now, Yu," Lavi muttered as he closed the office's door and marched out, not even hearing Lulu's attempts in flirting.

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Allen had walked half-way to the living quarters where the sanitars and doctors sometimes stayed if they didn't have time to get home after work - what happened quite a lot, actually - when his head suddenly throbbed, and he grabbed it with one hand, supporting himself against a wall with the other. The tiredness mixed with the various gas he had to breathe that day, and the hallway in front of him seemed to be floating.

"Damn it.." he muttered, rubbing his eyes.

Suddenly he heard a laugh, and quickly turned to face it, however the figure he saw didn't seem familiar at all. It had a huge, crescendent moon shaped grin on, and it was getting closer. "Hello, Allen Walker, the selfish one."

"Stay away!" the white-haired man shouted, stepping backwards and reaching back for something he could use to hit the figure. He figured he had to be hallucinating due to what he had been through that day, but he never imagined it to be so real. It felt almost like...a very strong dream was leaking into reality, and he was sure he had nothing to do with it. "Who are you-"

He didn't get to finish the sentence as something hit him over the head and he fell down unconscious, hitting one of metal shelves and cutting his left arm.

"Hii, another loonie doctor went mad," Jasdero said, poking Allen with his foot. "It was so creepy!" His twin grinned a bit, he was holding what seemed to be a piece of pipe.

"Dude, the guy's talking to the fucking air. I wonder if we'd still get the Christmas bonus if we report it?"

Jasdero's eyes went wide with glee, "That would be awesome, Devi! Dero thinks we should, hee!"

Devit's grin widened. "What should we write in the report?" he asked. "Schizophrenia? It would be easy to fake if later on it turned out to be wrong."

"Hee! We have proof anyway!"

The twins giggled madly as they managed to lift Allen with united efforts, and started carrying him towards one of farther wards that they knew had a lock. Something devilish was radiating from both of them; it wasn't a childish mischievousness anymore, it was something else, almost frightening.

"We should probably stop the bleeding," Devit grumbled as his shoulder slowly turned red. They had just opened the ward's door and were about to dump the still unconscious fellow sanitar on the bed when a voice from behind them came.

"What are you two doing?"

A teenage girl with a fluffy skirt stopped in the doorway and peeked inside curiously, her face gaining a wide smile.

"Ooooh, Allen!"

The twins looked at each other for a few moments, then suddenly grinned.

"Comere, Road," Devit said sweetly. "We found your precious Allen talking to the air in front of him-"

"Hee, well it coulda been anything-yow!" Jasdero whined as Devit stepped on his foot.

"-he seemed like he was having a panic attack so we restrained him, but he's also hurt...would you like to take care of it?" His grin grew even wider if possible. "Dear sis?"

"Oh, would I?" Road chirped, smiling widely. "Absolutely!"

The twins grinned and booked it out of the ward, while Road grinned widely and closed the doors afterwards, turning back to Allen.

"Oh, Allen-kun, now we're going to play and have so much fun!"

There was something hellish and horrifying in her sweet smile and tone. She danced around the ward, pulling out drawers and taking out various bottles and instruments, and setting it all on the table next to the bed, then finding some spare ropes and belts that were used to make sure the patient didn't move.

"Now we're going to wake you up.."

The ward's walls didn't let the scream that followed escape.

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"Was that...real?" Kanda asked silently as he stared into the water where his old teacher had showed up for a few moments just a little ago. He seemed to be deep in thought, though actually his mind was empty, and he heard strange buzzing in his ears, like a thousand bees in a distant honey tree.

The Rabbit nodded lightly. "If you cannot find your lifewish here," he said, "you should sink deeper into that world, and you just might find it there. Then you will be ready to get back here and continue until you meet her."

Kanda perked up lightly, a bad hunch running through him. "Her who?"

"You'll see," the Rabbit muttered evasively, looking away. "It's something you must do though. When you meet her, your soul will gain peace."

"I'll die?" Kanda snorted a bit, all that soul talk was getting to him a bit, even if he did believe in reincarnation thanks to his family's religion.

Rabbit shook his head, his ears flopping in a comical manner. "No. You will be able to continue on and forget this place. If you don't..." Kanda's eyes narrowed. "...the guilt inside of you will eat you up, and you will end up here, trapped in the form of your own grief, until the end of time as souls are supposed to be immortal."

"I'm not sure if I want to continue," Kanda muttered, glaring down at the lake. He wasn't sure if he'd ever be able to forgive himself for what he, in his opinion, had let to happen, especially now when Yuki couldn't confirm her forgiveness anymore.

Rabbit looked at him sadly. "That's why you have to go, for now." He hopped closer to Kanda, staring up at him intently. "You need to see it to be able to wish to live it. Find me, and I will show you."

"What?" Kanda asked confused, feeling a chill run down his spine as once again in the rippling reflections in the water he saw a familiar face. "What do you mean? Why do you keep showing this man to me?"

"Because your heart wished to meet him," Rabbit answered silently, "even if just for a moment, you wanted to know who he is. If you can do that, maybe you can find the will again."

Kanda simply shook his head, unable to understand.

Rabbit nodded lightly. "Sleep now," he said. "And experience the truth through dream. I will wake you up if I decide it's needed."

The Japanese wanted to say something else, but his mind suddenly became heavy, and his head slowly reached the ground, the surroundings fading away into blackness.

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The next morning, Lavi took the journal and, as usually, walked to Kanda's ward to... observe him a bit more. He never realized that he spend a lot more time there than he should have. His mind a bit numb at the moment due to fulfilling routine, yet at the same time somewhat cheerful since he liked it, he turned the key and pushed the door handle. He totally didn't expect what came next.

Kanda was sitting in his bed, his eyes turning to Lavi right at the moment he walked in, looking completely conscious. The redhead stopped and tilted his head a bit, it wasn't anything new for Kanda to wake up from time to time, but of course it was showing progress.

"Morning," Lavi greeted casually though he knew he wouldn't get a reply and walked closer intending to sit on his usual chair. Kanda frowned a bit, though he still looked at the doctor with completely clear gaze. And then it happened. The black-hair spoke, loud and clear, his pleasant-to-the-ear voice a bit hoarse due to being unused but his tone completely rational and even a bit demanding as his black eyes looked up at Lavi.

"Who the hell you really are?"

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End Chapter

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HE FINALLY TALKS WHILE BEING AWARE OF IT! : D

By the way, Allen is alive. You'll learn what happened to him next chapter. : D