|| Chapter [Thirty] ||
Never Ending

[C].o.m.m.e.n.t.s::: I UPDATED BITTER SWEET! Oh my God, how long has it been? A month? MAYBE TWO? God I hope its only one XD I’m so sorry it took forever to update this AND I’M EVEN MORE SORRY IT’S A CRUMMY CHAPTER. I’ve just been so distracted with a few things lately and I haven’t had the time, I’m just so happy I’ve finally got a chapter. Sorry if I’ve disappointed you with a bad one, I do hope you like it any way. AND I HOPE NO ONE FORGOT ABOUT IT XDXD

Thankies to Dee bear for letting me use her name … even though she doesn’t actually know about it yet … but meh, love ya xP ENJOY AND DON’T WORRY: Chapter Twenty Nine will be picked back up propery … and oh my god I’m really regretting putting this up, I’m so sorry guys.

Teeth almost chattering, her skin shivering furiously and her blood cold around her body, she rubbed her bare arms, pulling her knees up a little. “It’s so cold …” she breathlessly whispered, not having the energy to actually talk properly. All she could think about was the ice cold air biting at her flesh; winter was coming faster then she had expected. Still, it felt good. It felt good to be sitting on the hospital roof, to be able to look down at the lit up streets of Miltia during the night. Faith was still wearing her skirt, tights and shirt, but there was a happy glint in her eyes. The dream had been what she expected; just a dream, though she could feel something else. There was something bigger, something important that was still looming in her mind, but she wouldn’t allow her to think of it. They had been through so much, enough to make her head blow up, and she didn’t want anymore. Whatever it was could wait; so she kept it hidden in her mind, locked in a chest; the key no where to be found. She wanted time with Gaignun, as much as Gaignun wanted time with her. Chaos was right; she had merely had a stomach pump at a younger age, the baby was just part of a cruel nightmare her mind had given her. Or so she wished to believe. She forced herself to believe it, told it to herself so many times that it was real; that there was no other explanation; her mind believed it.

Gaignun slipped to the side a little, moving closer to her as he wrapped his arms around her body. For a few seconds she didn’t respond and stayed as still as a statue. There was something on her mind as he looked at her gems in curiosity. The wind blew gently, making her locks dance in the wind, which were about the only things moving on the woman. And finally, after the seconds that felt like minutes, she leaned her body on his, collecting his warmth. “The stars are pretty, don’t you think Faith?”

“Yeah …” she whispered, not looking up at them. “Gaignun …” she suddenly said, feeling tears prick her eyes. She glared slightly, stopping them from leaving. She would be dammed if she let herself cry. It was the last thing she would do. “I’m sorry.”

“You have no reason to apologize, Faith,” he smiled, leaning down to gently nuzzle her soft hair. “It’s okay, like I said before.”

“Please …” she begged through the sobbing, through the tears that wouldn’t stop falling down from her eyes. Her shaking arms rested on the table in the female room of the Elsa; her fingers twisting themselves to the point they were close to snapping. Opposite her was another red head, his own hands close to hers and his own arms trembling. Ice blue eyes looked at her as she stared down, whimpering and sobbing quietly. Faith was trying with all her might to keep it back as her body was engulfed in cold. Seeing her furiously shivering, the raven headed man looked to her with concerned eyes.

Before he had noticed his beloved shivering, he was looking down to the floor, leaning his back against the wall as she gained the information he already had. He wouldn’t look at her, unable to see her face crumble as she got the news. Stressfully, his hand was against his mouth; thumb and index finger separated to fit around his chin. Once his brother had told her, he shut his eyes straight away, furrowing his brows when she began to cry. Now he was going to one of the beds that had been given to her. With slightly trembling hands he took the chocolate brown and white stripped blanket that matched the sheet covers. Still unsure of what else to do, he put the blanket across her shoulders, wrapping it around her chest as he slid to sit down beside her. Tenderly, he put his hand on her thigh; trying to provide some sort of comfort.

(‘You look like a damm doll!!’) Rubedo’s voice echoed through Gaignun’s mind. (‘At least do something more. You talk to her about getting married when you suck at comforting her!’)

(‘I don’t know what I’m supposed to do, Jr,’) Gaignun replied with a dull voice as he continued to look at Faith’s red and swollen face, covered in damp tears. (‘Besides, I’d have thought you would be more upset then she would be.’)

(‘Kirshwasser. She was a Kirshwasser, don’t forget that, Gaignun,’) Rubedo said, looking to Faith as well.

“Not true,” she whispered, shaking her head. “It’s not true … Please tell me it’s not true.”

Sighing, Gaignun moved a hand to stroke her hair gently, covering his gems with his lids. “It is true, Faith … I’m so sorry …”

“It’s impossible! Albedo can’t be dead! He’s told me ever since I was a kid. He can’t die!” she yelled, still looking down with a face mixed with dismay and denial. From her words both brothers blinked. Gaignun lifted his head and looked at her with confused, shocked eyes and Rubedo did the same. The girl was like a little chest of secrets, many precious secrets and it seemed the trio were the keys; Rubedo, Albedo and Gaignun. Gaignun especially, getting most of the memories from her head.

After a long pause of silence that Faith didn’t notice, Rubedo managed to shake his head. Clearing his throat, he blinked one final time and spoke. “When you were a kid?” he repeated.

“Did you know Albedo as a child, Faith?” Gaignun asked; brows rose as he looked at her with a horrified expression.

“I wanted a friend,” she whispered. “I’ve always wanted a friend, Gaignun …” she whispered; more tears pricking her eyes. “I was so Goddamn sick of being the murderer, the one with the dark heart; why do you think I killed mother?! He didn’t seem to care. He was my friend.”

“Your friend?” Gaignun almost scoffed; his father’s personality seeping into his to the point the tears on Faith’s face froze. She lifted her chin, staring at Gaignun. Or more precisely, staring at Dmitri. “How was he a friend when he hurt you? When he damaged you as a Kirshwasser? That man is not your friend: never has been and never will be, Faith. Something has always been wrong with Albedo, and he will never care for you.”

The sharp slap echoed through the walls, making Rubedo stare in astonishment. Faith’s hand mark was red on Gaignun’s now stinging cheek. His head was turned to the side thanks to her strength, and his eyes were wide like his brothers. His father had quickly slipped from his mind, replacing his personality with his own only. Angry lilac gems stared at him, her hand shaking.

“We do not speak ill of the dead,” she hissed. “Nor do we try to assume what we do not know.” And with that final growl she left the room quickly.

A blade, stolen from the kitchens was held tight around her fingers, shaking as her body shook. Tears still quietly streamed down the young woman’s face as she sat down on the floor. The room she was in was small and cramp, in the depth of the basement. The only light came from an old fashioned, dying bulb dangling above her head; dust cascading from it. The pieces of dust looked almost like miniature fly’s floating about in the air, illuminated by only the yellow light. Oak shelves surrounded her; her back leaned against the only bit of wall space there was, the cold seeping into her veins quickly. The shelves were crowded with all sorts of random junk from plates and cups to pens and paper; things Faith didn’t care about nor need to care about. All she cared for was the blade in hand, and her left wrist.

Breathing deeply, gulping every now and then, the trembling woman put the edge of the blade to her skin. Near the blade was a small scar from where Albedo had once slit her wrist. Inhaling deeply, she pushed the sharp metal into her flesh, feeling it pierce as a stinging pain ran up her arm, to her shoulder, and even at her fingers. Groaning, she pushed it in deeper, before making a quick slice and pulling the blade from her flesh. From her wrist, going down to her forearm was a large incision, seeping quickly with her blood. The warm liquid quickly covered her left arm as she began to breathe deeper; her fingers letting go of the blade as she felt weak.

Leaning her head on the wall, she half shut her eyes. Ignoring the stinging as best she could, she focused on the sweet scent of blood lingering in her nose and the warm of it on her skin. She could feel the liquid dripping from her arm, and when she gave a small glimpse to her wound she could see that her fingers were drenched, along with her hand and arm. It was a bloody mess thanks to her piercing a vein dramatically. Her energy slowly left her body, like it had done many times. Many times she had been in a situation where she was falling into unconsciousness; scared for her life. But this time, there was no fear. She just sat back and accepted what was coming.

Concentrating so much on the warm blood rather then the pain, she didn’t even notice the door slowly open. A small crack of the outdoor light came into the room, which was quickly covered by a shadow. Finally, when she heard the click of the door shitting behind, she looked up.

A sigh left the person’s lips as she stared. “This isn’t healthy for you.”

“It won’t kill me …” she sighed, looking back at the blood. “Nothing can kill me.”

“I know,” he said, moving down to crouch beside her, inhaling her intoxicating aroma. Her scent was a mixture of lilies and roses, with a sickening scent of blood he could easily pretend wasn’t there. His beautiful eyes that she had once been so found of stared at her. They tried to avoid the blood but couldn’t help a small glance at it now and then.

“What are you doing here, Yeshua?” she asked wearily, as if his appearance was a trap.

He sighed deeply. “I’m … not quite sure.”

“That’s helpful,” she scoffed, turning her head to him. She sighed deeply, moving slightly as the pain turned into a dull sting. Chaos watched, unsure of what to do.

“If you run out of blood they’re going to get suspicious,” he told her, remembering the fact the government were after her. If someone reported a young woman that didn’t have blood yet was still living there would be a full on investigation. They weren’t that dumb to not notice the girl in the picture was the same woman.

“They can get as suspicious as they wish,” she sighed. “It has to come out sooner or later. Gaignun especially must know.”

There was a long pause as chaos’s eyes glazed over, his mind deep in thought. “Gaignun knows of me and you, Yeshua yet he will not pry.”

“There is nothing to pry into,” he quietly said, sitting down on the cold floor properly. “It was years ago, as you said, and anyway; you don’t have all your memories back properly … not yet.”

“I’m done with the memories,” she said, looking down at her arm that was still heavily bleeding. Her body had gotten used to such damages, poundings and other near-death experiences that she could stay awake. God knew how much blood was left in her; a normal person would have been dead already. “That was then, this is now and right now I’m concentrating on me and Gaignun. He’s my only concern.”

She didn’t know it, but her words were like a stab to chaos’s heart. Clearing his throat, he managed to slowly push himself up to his feet. His eyes were still attached to her as he stood, his voice quiet as he spoke. “At the dive … you told me you were going to give Albedo your life in exchange for Gaignun to live. Did you know you couldn’t die then?”

“No, I didn’t know,” she answered, looking away from them as the pair were engulfed in a dark silence. She sighed deeply. “Do you see what I mean by I’m done with the memories? We could have been good friends if I didn’t remember; you protected me and were at my side at the beginning now it’s always strange and hard.”

He sighed, shutting his eyes. “Remember or not I wouldn’t have been able to keep it in. And even though you remember, I still care for you and I respect your decision about Gaignun. Nothing will stop me from protecting you because at the moment you’re my only concern.”

With that he was quick to leave the room, leaving Faith to bleed on the floor. Groaning, she pushed herself to her feet, kicking the knife under a shelf. With her good hand she grabbed her white jacket from the floor, and wrapped it around the wound on her wrist; covering all traces of blood. As the fabric began to stick to her flesh, the pain worsened and she couldn’t help but utter a small cry before biting her lip to hold it back. Her feet moved quickly as she left the room, and travelled to the Medical room; not too far from where she was.

“Faith! There you are,” Gaignun’s voice echoed deep in her ear, making her shiver and freeze on the spot. Slowly she turned to him, seeing his lips widen in a smile that she returned. “Where were you? Are you alright?”

“Fine, Gaignun,” she smiled, putting her arm behind her back casually. “Perfectly fine. I’m sorry I ran off earlier.”

“It’s okay,” he smiled, leaning down to kiss her nose lovingly. “As long as your fine, everything is okay.”

She nodded. “Yeah … I just need to go do something …”

“Damm it!!” she cried through her tears that were drowning her face. “Ahh … tch … that really hurts!”

“Then fucking do it yourself, ungrateful brat!” ‘The other hand of God’ growled deep into the fifteen year olds ear, making her shiver. She shut her eyes tighter, upset from her brother’s yelling.

“You’re pushing the needle in too deep!” she hissed through the pain. “Stop it! You’re not meant to even be using thread!”

“Thread’s all I fucking have, so unless you want to go explaining this to mother I suggest you shut your trap,” he growled louder then before, digging the needle into the torn flesh just to create more pain for her. In reaction she cried out, her flesh already tender.

“Please, just take me to the hospital!” she begged, feeling her head go dizzy from the pain and blood loss. “I won’t do anything to anyone, please.”

“After last time you were there?” he asked, raising a brow. “I don’t think so.”

“But Gabriel, it hurts!!” she whined.

The fifteen year old Faith was seated on the couch, her fingers clinging onto the cushions tightly; so tight her knuckles were plastered white. So many tears had left her eyes over the short amount of time, the hair near her face was damp and her neck was drenched in the fat tears that would never stop. Her eyes were screwed shut, her body leaning foreword slightly as pain flooded her senses. Her thing leg was drenched in blood; a bloody left hand was continuously wiping it clean, the hand belonging to Gabriel. Below her knee was a large incision, almost in a semi-circle shape. Her latest victim had a fighting streak in her; the woman named Destiney Cheatham was no pushover. She had grabbed whatever she could whilst been fought by Faith and in the end; somehow, barbed wire had gotten into her grip. She dug it into the leg of Faith, using both her hands and tore up her flesh that was still, miraculously, attached to her. Now, Gabriel had the ‘wonderful’ task of seeing to his sisters wounds. With nothing more then thread in the house, or so he said, he got to work, putting Faith through more pain then the injury Destiney Cheatham had given her.

He worked carefully, quickly with her wound. Every so often he would look up to his sister, checking her face; sometimes giving her a squeeze of her hand with his bloody one but that would be it. After ten minutes of pain, the door opened but neither of the siblings had noticed the person enter until they spoke.

“Maser Gabriel! What in the world have you done to Miss Ackermann?!” Damion’s shocked voice gasped; his eyes wide. Gabriel responded in an irritated groan and Faith’s hazy, pain filled eyes looked up to Damion.

“My … newest …w-was …strong …” she said through gritted teeth. Damion stared before looking to Gabriel.

“Why don’t you take her to the hospital?” he questioned with a raised brow.

“You wanna’ explain to them how she got the wound, and why she ain’t dead?” Gabriel countered angrily, making Damion stare in silence. “Didn’t think you did … Mother can’t find out about this, Damion.”

“I will not spread the word, Master Gabriel,” he promised.

“I slept all day, I woke with distaste,” Faith gently sung to herself after shutting the empty medical room door behind herself. She began work on her arm; ignoring the pain as she stitched her wound together. “And I read, I read, that the difference between the sprout and the bean … it is a golden ring …”

As she worked, her mind flooded with thoughts of Albedo; was he really dead? Would he ever come back and did that mean she could die too? They were just questions she couldn’t answer, nor did she want to. She didn’t want to see that madman again, but apart of her would miss him. He was part of her life, her only life at one point and she knew it would be hard.

Once she had done and had cleaned up the blood, something wrapped around her waist. The sudden tingling sensation caused the girl to jump out of her skin but she couldn’t move; the arm around her holding her tight to the warm, that was breathing gently. “G-Gaignun?” she questioned, still stunned.

“Yeah,” he whispered in her ear, kissing it gently. She giggled slightly, asking what he was doing but was granted no reply. After a few peaceful minutes he kissed her ear once more. “We’re heading home and I’ve taken time off work … just me and you …”

“And nothing will get in the way, no memories, no stupid nightmares, no nothing,” she smiled happily, putting her hands on his arms that were wrapped around her.

“You finished my speech, now what am I mean to say?” he asked playfully. She laughed, turning around to him; his emerald eyes having not yet noticed the wound on her arm.

“Whatever else is in your heart,” she smirked, poking his chest gently. “But … before you do, I need to tell you something about me.”

Slowly, she let her wounded arm come into his eye sight. “I know why Albedo was fascinated with me when I was younger. Why he beat me. Gaignun, I can’t die.”