All right, I know that all the main characters would probably not
have a class together, but I put Ryoga, Shampoo, Ukyo, Akane, Ranma, and
Kuno in the same class. So sue me. Er. Wait, that's a bad thing to say in a
story where all the characters are copyrighted creations of someone in
Japan, who doubtless has the money to. I'll just shut up now.
P.S. I know the haiku's suck.
Ranma Saotome sat at his desk, fingering a pink pen. So I dance with
you in my dreams, dear Akane. no, that sounds desperate. How about, I like
you, even though you are pushy, and an aho. No! Oh, I'll never get this
right! Just then, Akane walked in the classroom door.
"Miss Tendo, you are late." The teacher said. Akane nodded.
"I know." She said darkly, staring at Ranma, "Someone spilled tea on
me. A whole pot full." She finished, sitting down. Kuno leaned over next to
"My dear Akane, you smell divine." He said. She pulled out a random
mallet and smacked him with it. The teacher glanced sharply at them,
"Kuno, Blue Lightning-chan, will you please read the poem on page
13?" she asked sweetly. Dazedly, he opened the book and read.
"She loves another,
Do your eyes not see, for she
And you, will ne'er be" he read. He sat down. The teacher went on
explaining how to write a haiku.
Ranma was still laboring over his note. He grimly tossed another
piece of paper. Someone passed a note to him. On it was, written in a curly
"To Ranma." He opened it.
Shampoo miss you! It seem as though we mile apart, but we only feet. Who
Ranma smiled grimly and put the note away. Shampoo glanced back at
him. The teacher stopped.
"Shampoo. Would you like to keep your eye on the book? Now read the
poem on page 14 for us." The teacher said. Shampoo stood.
"His love is true, dear,
Though sadly not to you, dear,
Let it go, go dear." She sat down, biting her lip. The teacher went
Ryoga sat in his desk, scribbling with a blue pen. Obviously a love letter,
obviously hoping to be a better one than Ranma's.
My dearest Akane,
I love you. You are more beautiful than all the roses of May, and all the
April. I don't want to lose you to Ranma, so I must tell you my secret. I,
Abruptly, Ryoga crumpled up the paper, and, not trusting to throw it away,
he ate it. The teacher turned.
"Eating in class, Ryoga? Read the poem on page 15. Now." He stood,
smiling with his sharp teeth.
"Little lost boy, why cry?
You knew she wasn't meant for
You from the start, ne?" he said. He sat down. Then, looking
dolefully at Akane, he frowned. The teacher resumed her lesson.
Ukyo was penning her own note. Dear Ran-chan. I know I can only make
good okonomiyaki, but that's only in food. I make other things really well.
Koi, for example. She frowned. No, too forward. She thought, ripping it up.
What can I say to make him pay more attention to me? Ah I've got it! She
"Pay more attention to me," she said, a little too loudly. The
"Okay, Ukyo. How about page 16?" She said. Ukyo stood.
"Oh, my spatula girl,
How blind your love makes you now!
Leave him to his own." She sat, feeling a little weird. Everyone's
eyes flicked to the giant spatula on her back. She frowned. The teacher
concentrated back on her lesson.
Akane sighed, It's not as if we don't already know about haiku's! She
thought. Her sigh must have been too loud.
"Miss Akane? Would you have something to say?" The teacher asked.
Akane looked surprised.
"Uh, um I" she said. The teacher sniffed.
"Well you can read the next poem in our book." The teacher said.
Akane looked stupidly at it. Ranma chuckled. Akane gave him a dirty look
and snatched up the book.
"His voice is mocking,
But his eyes say he won't
Maybe it is love" She stopped, and sat down. For some reason,
she looked at Ranma. He was working furiously on a note. He made a silent
groan, and crumpled up the paper. He threw it, not noticing where it went.
It landed in Akane's lap. She unwrinkled it and looked at it. Written in
pink pen, in Ranma's scrawling hand, were the words,
I love you but I,
Cannot say it, for fear of,
Loving you too much
Akane looked over at Ranma, laboring over his note. She silently
tucked the poem into her backpack.
Ranma was too preoccupied to notice Akane drop the note in her
backpack. He was now getting frustrated with the note. How do I love you,
let me count the- Oh! Too unoriginal! How about, Akane, dear Akane, that
sounds better. Though I am a girl sometimes. Original, but no. Er, um. Ok,
how about this. Dear Akane, do you know how I really love you? Really? I
do. When I lay in bed at night, I think of you. When I sleep, I dream of
you. Before I awaken, your lovely visage is on my eyelids. Every day, your
beauty, wit, charm, and skills, follow me forever. I cry inside, because I
know you may not love me. I sigh in my heart, because no matter how I try,
my love comes out hate. I doubt it is that way for you, though even when
your angry eyes are staring at me, and even when your angry mouth is
calling me hentai, ecchi, I see your lovely hair, your eyes shining, your
mouth smiling, I see you doing form or breaking bricks and I love you. I
wish I could tell you more, but I fear I will soon insult you somehow. So I
leave you with my love, and tell you, break my heart. But only if you want
me to die. For I will.
He looked at the letter, signed it with a flourish, and stood.
"Miss Usaigi, I would like to read a poem." The teacher said,
mockingly, "Is that what you were standing to say? Page 18." She finished.
He smiled crookedly.
"Dearest boy girl, heed.
Supply of love fulfills the need,
Do not worry anymore." He sat, smiling. He looked at the note, scrawled in
his best handwriting, folded it, and wrote To Akane on it. Then he went
into his backpack, took out a folder, and slid the note inside, among the
other notes, all addressed to Akane. Maybe someday I'll give them to her.
He thought, Someday..
Ukyo looked at him sadly, Maybe someday I'll win him. Someday.
Shampoo looked at her note, sticking out of his backpack, Maybe someday, he
love me. Someday.
Ryoga glanced at Akane. Maybe someday, she'll find out. Someday.
Akane glanced over at Ranma, smiling. Maybe someday I'll tell him, Someday.