Reign of the Dark Mistress

Written by Jody and Cariel

These days, it was incredibly frustrating to know how closely her husband was watching her. It was no longer the lustful-filled eyes of an obsessed teenager, but now a far more devious, untrusting stare which left Amidala feeling far more uneasy than ever before. His close relationship with Chancellor Palpatine blinded him from the truth of the chancellor’s motives; she knew this.

Amidala hated feeling trapped. Not only was she trapped politically, for the Delegation’s attempt to get Palpatine to relinquish his emergency powers had failed, but she was also trapped in this marriage she no longer desired to be in. Recently, she had begun to wonder if he didn’t get her pregnant on purpose, not that she would ever accuse him of this. She struggled to get used to the idea, convincing herself her family wanted this for her all along, and that she was getting older…

She thought, in the beginning of their marriage, that it would be easier for her to get out of it, since there were only a few who knew about it. She had an affection for Anakin, but it wasn’t really love. She thought she would grow to love him, but it was vastly becoming true that such love would never manifest between them. As time moved on, she regretted her rash decision to marry the Jedi. One of the illustrations that they truly did not know each other very well was the fact she half-expected him to tell her to get rid of the child or give it up for adoption. She was gobsmacked that he was so happy about it, that he thought the child was a blessing. A blessing for whom?

Though most people were not so judgemental as to demand who the father of this child was, there were many in the galaxy who still believed a woman ought to be married when having children. Marriage and babies went hand-in-hand. And having children in the middle of galactic warfare was incredibly selfish. Amidala hadn’t engaged in many selfish activities in her life, but this marriage, having this child…this would be selfish.

It was always about other people’s needs, not her own selfish interests. Even this marriage and this child was really for her parents and her sister, rather than her own desires. What she cared about, truly cared about, was the future of the Republic, ending the war and bringing about peace. She was not so naïve as to think that ending the war would solve all of the galaxy’s problems—including those building in her secret marriage—nor did she think that one person would be able to do so alone.

There was so much going on in the galaxy—the Republic struggling to survive, while simultaneously crumbling in front of her eyes. It was the last she wanted and Anakin didn’t understand. He never did. There was a reason she would still refer to him by the childish nickname of ‘Ani’: because he was still such a child. He was a warrior, not a politician. He was a distraction, one that became more of an annoyance than a diversion. She had responsibilities and was needed by the people. She never wanted children, not really. She didn’t want this child.

Now she was more than aware of Anakin’s descent in darkness. She knew how lost he was becoming. She knew what he was capable of. Anakin had always been obsessed, but it was only getting worse. She feared to refuse him. He was so intense and angry—she couldn’t dismiss him or his fears of her dying in childbirth. It was like walking on eggshells around him. She tried to work it out, but he just never understood her or where she was coming from. The way he feared for her life was as outrageous as his fears were. If she were to try to divorce him…he would never forgive her. And there were times when Anakin would clutch her so forcefully that it was painful. He always wanted to be touching her and she felt so claustrophobic around him.

As much as she wanted to hide her allegiance to the Alliance and her importance to their efforts, she knew there was no escaping Anakin’s eyes. She didn’t doubt he would be reading her mind, which was why she insisted to the Alliance members that she could not know any more of their plans. It was why she was so incredibly sad to admit this to Bail.

The look in Bail’s eyes said it all.

As his visit drew to a close, she gave him the last of her holodiscs encrypted with information on the Alliance, knowing it was no longer safe in her possession. Their fingers briefly touched, though a bit longer than was necessary. Their eyes met. It was never like this with Anakin. Amidala had never known such longing before. They were friends, had been friends for such a long time…and both of them were married. But just looking into Bail’s eyes, she knew the truth: they were in love, yet here she was, pregnant with Anakin’s child, in a forbidden, secret marriage… It was incredibly unfair!

She had tears in her eyes as he bid her farewell, knowing there would be no more clandestine Alliance meetings, for she was in this too deep and Anakin would find out…their committee would be destroyed. She could not risk it. Parting with Bail was the hardest thing she ever had to do and she hated Anakin for it. She hated herself even more for getting into this mess to begin with.

After the senate meeting, Amidala returned to her chambers, trying to figure out what she was going to do. Last she heard from Anakin, he said he was off to Mustafar on an important mission for the Chancellor. She did not have to guess what it would entail.

‘So this is how liberty dies, with thunderous applause…’ she said wryly, feeling like she was living her worst nightmare.

Bail objected, ‘We cannot let this happen!’ and began to stand up.

Amidala pulled him down. ‘Not now!’ she cautioned. ‘There will be a time…’

The way Bail wanted to object, to refuse to take the Chancellor’s lies against the Jedi anymore…it made Amidala’s heart ache. She knew she couldn’t let him verbalise his opinion, that it would only get him killed, but how she wanted so badly to stand up and object with Bail, side-by-side, objecting to the tyranny and injustice and lies…

Obi-Wan arrived, asking about Anakin’s whereabouts. She knew if she told him, Anakin would find out and consider it a betrayal on her part…and then he’d kill her. She had been fearing for her life so frequently these days that it was almost second nature to be reluctant to be given any secret information or share any of what she knew. But as he further explained Anakin’s descent, his fall to the dark side, his slaughter of the Temple younglings, she could no longer hide the truth. Even at the risk of her life, she knew she had to stand against Anakin.

‘I will take you to him,’ she replied, slowly rising from the couch. She summoned her handmaidens and personal body guards. She requested Moteé and Ellé remain behind, with Moteé as her decoy should she fail to return. Sabé and Dormé boarded the vessel with Captain Typho and Obi-Wan behind them.

She, like Obi-Wan and Sabé, was a pacifist by nature. She hated fighting, she hated war, but she also knew that there were some situations that called for violent actions, the invasion of Naboo being one of them. She just prayed that his former Master would be able to talk him down and that it would not come to violence. If anyone would be able to appeal to Anakin, it would be Obi-Wan, Amidala thought. And if all else failed, Obi-Wan would be able to remove him.

The air was thick and humid filled with the scent of sulfer and other noxious gases. Anakin knew he shouldn’t be out here for too long and yet at the same time he couldn’t exactly bring himself to return indoors either. He needed room, air to breathe and a moment to collect his troubled thoughts.

Now that he had restored peace to the galaxy, Vader couldn’t help but wonder what his future now held. His marriage to Padmé was all but a joke and now with the soon to be arrival of his child Anakin found himself second guessing what he once believed to be a gift. While he always wanted to have a home filled with the sound of children’s laughter the Sith Lord had finally realized that this wasn’t what Padmé wanted at all. In fact, it seemed there was little if anything that either of them had in common anymore.

Now he found himself wondering and fearing for their child as he knew that Padmé was hardly nurturing by nature though she humoured his need for affection upon occasion. He was certain that when his wife learnt about what he had done at the Jedi temple Padmé would take their baby and leave. In fact he was almost positive she would. He frowned to the thought knowing if she did he’d kill her without a further thought.

Why wait until it comes to that? His eyes wavered to the horrifying thought as tears immediately came to them. Bowing his head, he furrowed his brow and forced his thoughts to clear. Forcing himself to pretend that the thought never occurred to him, Anakin reminded himself that while things were complicated between Padmé and him, it wasn’t entirely impossible. Surely, once the baby was born, things would fall into place. With his new master dead and the empire for them to rule, Vader knew that they’d be able to finally be the family he always wanted them to be. Even if Padmé didn’t want a child, Anakin was confident that once they were born she’d come to love them.

Perhaps even come to love you as well, his thoughts whispered in desperate hope as a single tear spilled down his cheek. At one time, he believed that she did love him, that their love would get them through all the complications of their secretive marriage. Now he wondered if she ever loved him at all or if she married him more out of fear of his powers than anything else.

Suddenly he found himself longing for the presence of his best friend and Padmé’s personal handmaiden, Dormé. If not for anything than for her to calm his troubled thoughts and tell him that he was overreacting over nothing…that everything would work out in the end.

However, before this thought could fully manifest, the Sith Lord caught sight of a silver glimmer in the bloodied sky. A rush of hope filled his thoughts though it wasn’t because he knew that it was Padmé who was piloting the ship. Rather it was that he knew she would never embark on a journey without his best friend and her decoy close at hand. Unfortunately, he was far too distracted with his thoughts to take note of the subtle shift in the Force that marked the fact that someone was trying to hide their signatures from him. Without another thought, he promptly rushed back inside and departed for the landing pads where he waited eagerly for both Padmé and Dormé’s arrival.

Amidala bounded off the ship with one intention in mind, not thinking at all about her unborn children, but rather the effect of his allegiances on the Republic-turned-Empire. ‘I hope you’re satisfied!’ she said, storming over to him.

Obi-Wan thought it was only fair that Amidala have a chance to speak with Anakin, but was on guard and ready to exit the ship when necessary.

Dormé followed her mistress, though she didn’t say anything. She clenched her teach, wanting to speak up so badly, but knew it wasn’t her place. She hated when Padmé talked to him like she was all-knowing and high and mighty...as though she was better than Anakin.

Anakin rushed towards Padmé about to draw her into an embrace when her words caught him entirely off guard. Freezing in mid-step, he could only stare at her in stunned disbelief and confusion. But then his eyes drifted to the sight of Dormé and immediately his thoughts turned to the past…