Here's the second one, and boy was this fun to write...

I'm not sure about the Joan Rivers quote, though. I think it was said by her, but since I can't for the life of me find where I read it I can't check for certain. ^_^;

Subject: Kuroba Kaito

Prognosis: This oughta be fun...

Subject is an Asian teen male, age 17. High IQ, probably up around the same level as Kudo Shinichi's. Also a good sportsman (aside from Ice-skating) and clearly keeps himself in good shape to keep up the amount of running and acrobatics that Kid does- I'll bet he's got more than one double-joint, and he's likely to be ambidextrous as well. He's a right-brained person, however- creative (no! Really?), intuitive (in other words, good at winging it) and in better touch with his emotions. However, he seems to prefer to hide them as well; the famous Poker Face. Perhaps something little realized is that he has two forms of the Poker Face: there's the always-smiling front put up as the Kaitou Kid, which never flinches even when he's cornered (because he generally isn't; the only times he's come close to being truly cornered were at the Clock Tower and on the Q. Selizabeth, and both times it cracked briefly, allowing him to look worried), and then there's the one he wears in civilian life- the clown and idiot. As Shinichi and Hakuba are prime examples, people that intelligent rarely cut loose uninhibitedly as Kaito often does- which means that even in civilian life, he's got a lot to hide.

Despite how sociable and personable he is, however, he doesn't seem good at connecting deeply to people; Joan Rivers' quote "The easiest kind of relationship for me is with ten thousand people; the hardest is with one" definitely applies here. He's a showman, his entire life is a show, not just as Kid, which makes it hard for him to be genuine for anyone, and thus makes it hard to connect with people. The amount of pranks- and the audacity of some of them- that he pulls at school show that he loves to be in the spotlight at all times- he needs it. He doesn't act when there's no audience, which has worrying implications for what's lying in wait offstage.

Part of it is likely the simple fact that no-one can relate to his situation, with the possible exception of Kudo Shinichi, whom he's never met as Kuroba Kaito. People may well seem simplistic or naive to him, or perhaps he's so good at crowd control- and he really is, look how often and skilfully he manipulates the crowd, particularly in the teleporting trick- that he has a tendency to always see people as "part of the crowd" rather than individuals. The sole exceptions would seem to be Koizumi Akako (and I don't know if I dare delve into her ^_^;), Hakuba Saguru (who's pretty much up to Kaito's intellectual level, although I'd say he's slightly below) and of course Nakamori Aoko, whom he met as a small child, before his father's death- an incident that I'd definitely peg as the jumping-off point for a lot of his problems.

Kuroba Toichi, I can say with complete certainty, was his primary attachment figure- his ultimate role model, his relationship with whom has determined his emotional and social development and how he connects with people for the rest of his life. Given the number of flashbacks that place Toichi at the centre of some of the most important incidents of Kaito's childhood, his deep obsession with catching Toichi's murderers, and his occasional tendency (although this could just be bad fanscans) to refer to his father in the present tense indicate that Kuroba Toichi was the centre of his world and, in many ways, still is. The precise circumstances are unknown, but it's often said that it was onstage, so there's a possibility that Kaito saw it. This is never given either, but if he did it's likely he suppressed the memory, which could be why (if the fanscans are accurate) he occasionally refers to his father in the present tense; some part of his mind has bypassed the fact of his father's death entirely.

This is likely the cause of his obsessive non-violence. He simply can't bring himself to hurt anybody, or risk killing them like his father was killed, even the men who murdered him; he could feel that doing so would make him the same as them, his father's killers, the worst possible thing to be in his mind. This is also why he's willing to risk hanging around with the police, even disguising himself as Takagi on one occasion, in order to clear his name whenever he's accused of murder; he wants it clear that that's not him, it's not something he would ever do. This is emphasized by the card gun. It's vividly coloured, built to look like a gun out of a sci-fi manga rather than a proper gun, and it fires playing cards- basically a toy. He's subverted completely the concept of "gun", something that's more closely related to death and violence than pretty much any other weapon except knives in modern society.

In fact, almost every aspect of his appearance and character as Kid rejects criminal convention. He announces himself, when criminals prefer to sneak in; he eats up the spotlight from which criminals run; he dresses flashily, noticeably and memorably, while most criminals prefer subtlety and disguise; He's friendly and cheerful, always showing perfect manners, rather than threatening or coercing people; he's happy enough to give up his target in order to make his escape and indeed always returns what he steals, rather than ransoming, keeping or selling it. Pretty much every aspect of the Kaitou Kid, in fact, is intended to convey that he's not a criminal, distinguishing himself from his father's murderers. In the public's eyes, he's almost purely an entertainer. He, in turn, has his concept of "justice" very distinct from his concept of "law". He doesn't mind breaking the law in order to see justice done- to draw out the murderers and see them arrested. He probably doesn't see himself as doing anything wrong, really- and in relative terms, he really isn't. He doesn't work with set variables like Shinichi does; everything's relative terms to him. He probably enjoys the challenge that Shinichi gives him- highly intelligent people tend to enjoy a mental workout, which is why, at the end of the Walking on Air heist, he commented that "all I really wanted was a rematch with you, tantei-kun". He probably likes having to wing it once in a while; it comes with an adrenaline rush that he's no doubt addicted to. He's an adrenaline junkie, plain and simple. More likely than not, what he likes most is the euphoria that comes with it.

There's other reasons that he may consciously choose not to connect with people. He's a marked man, under threat of death from the people who killed his father, and probably doesn't want anyone else mixed up in that mess. Given his marksmanship rating, you can't blame him for being paranoid. He's also, of course, terrified of Nakamori Aoko's reaction. She's made no bones about her feelings for Kid, and since she's a fairly simplistic person- and he knows that better than anyone- he finds it hard to believe that those feelings could change simply because it's him under the mask. This suggests a surprisingly low sense of self-worth, if he doesn't think that even his best friend would let her feelings be affected- he clearly believes that she doesn't think that much of him. It's not entirely unsurprising- performers are not naturally confident people, as you may be surprised to hear. They're all desperate for attention to some degree, and many of them only appear confident due to their extreme acting skills. In the Green Dream heist, Kid advises the nervous actress to pretend that the crowd are just pumpkins; this suggests that he's used this tactic more than once himself. He likely has low self-worth and self-confidence, which he masks with boundless energy and silliness and devours the spotlight. Possibly he fears that if he tries to be taken seriously, he won't be. This might be another factor in his relatively few relationships; to some degree, he fears that he's not particularly likeable offstage.

He avoids these fears by acting at all times and keeping people at arms' length. Aoko alone seems to have recognized what he's doing; early on she comments that he's "sweet but cold"- in other words, he's nice but she feels like it's fake (bullseye). He's especially scared of getting close to Aoko due to what he feels will be inevitable rejection. His mother is only seen once, and they are never seen to interact, so the nature of their relationship and how much she knows about what Kaito's up to is unclear (though she knows about the Room, so it's easy to presume that she knows that Kid is Kaito now), but the impression is that they're friendly but he keeps her at a distance like everyone else, something that's probably not really good for either given Toichi's death. Their lives seem to run more or less independently of each other, if the scarcity of her appearances is any indication, and she doesn't appear to interfere with or get involved with Kid's activities. She seems very friendly with Aoko, however, who is seen to address her as "auntie" (this was again in the fansub so I can't tell if the actual address was "obasan" or "obachan", the latter being considerably more familiar than the former). His only other relationship of note is with Konosuke Jii, who he addresses with the very familiar "Jii-chan", something of a pun as this is both his name and denotes him as a grandfather figure. However, the relationship seems to be a very formal one, like the butler and young master of a rich family (which they might be to some extent; Toichi must have left a hell of a nest egg for Kaito to afford all of that gear), as seen by how Jii addresses Kaito with "Bocchama", meaning "young master". He's been seen to hide things from Jii and vice versa, but he also always takes measures to protect Jii, agreeing to work with Nightmare to protect the elder, sneaking into a police station to mess with the helicopters during the Walking on Air heist, and making a very risky escape manoeuvre rather than risking either being arrested.

That's one point; he has a serious self-destructive streak. He's not fazed by serious peril or bodily injury, possibly a result of his low self-worth. He doesn't consider his life worth much, which is why he's willing to basically turn himself into a big white target for Snake in order to draw him out. The whole reason he publicizes his heists (even though it's been seen that he's proficient at old-fashioned cat burglary as well) is a "come and have a go if you think you're hard enough" to Snake. He's willing to go to any extremes to bring Snake down- except hurt someone. Possibly he likes Snake thinking he's Toichi, not just because it gives Kaito a degree of invisibility while they're looking for a dead guy, but because of the implications that he's just as skilled a magician as his father, whom he's got on an almost untouchably high pedestal. It's the closest thing to a compliment he's been seen to have been paid, and this might be the root of the self-worth problem; he acts stupid and overconfident all the time, so those around him (particularly Aoko and, of late, Hakuba) are driven to bring him down a peg, not realizing that in his own eyes, the peg's already on the floor and burrowing into the ground. He acts even more stupid and overconfident to compensate, and thus the vicious cycle continues. This is also probably the root of his light-hearted lechery. He doesn't really believe that he could cope with a decent romantic relationship or that anyone would want to be in one with him anyway- particularly the only one he does want to be in a relationship with- so he feels free to indulge in flirtations that he knows won't go anywhere.

Okay, what you've all been waiting for: the fish phobia. I'd say the reason for it would be that he's somehow associated fish with some traumatic experience, although it's hard to say what as it's unknown when the phobia began; the younger he was, the more arbitrary the connections may be. Aoko doesn't know about the phobia until the same day that Kaito discovers he's Kid, and only because his mother is good-naturedly trying to get him to try sushi (although surely she must have realized that Aoko had no good intent when asking about Kaito's greatest weakness?). Either it was a fairly recent thing, or he's just hidden it really well. The exact source is anybody's guess, from fish somehow being involved in Toichi's fatal trick to him simply coming across one of those particularly frightening chefs as a child- the kind who like to detail all the disgusting things that you didn't want to know was in their dishes (if no-one else has come across this kind of chef, I need to tell the restaurant owners in my town that they have strange taste in chefs.) in a sushi restaurant, possibly in the context of blowfish sushi. Since no precise root or time of commencement of the phobia is known, I'm inclined to go for Aoyama-sensei's explanation, which basically amount to "for shits and giggles". In terms of real psychology, it really could have been any remotely frightening experience in his childhood.

Overall, this guy seriously needs a self-esteem boost. His deep feelings of self-worthlessness and fear of rejection mean that someone else will probably have to make the first move, and that someone will almost certainly be Aoko. It would be a positive step if he could bring himself to have a closer relationship with his mother or Jii as well, or even someone his own age- Akako and Hakuba are both contenders here, but the one he'd relate with best could well be Shinichi, so it's too bad they don't come across each other much in civilian life. The root could simply be that he doesn't seem to have formed a deep attachment or a real relationship with anyone since his father's death, something that it's pretty much up to Aoko to change.

That was fun. ^_^ He's a lot sadder than you'd think, huh? I have no idea how often I'll do these. Whenever I come up with one, I guess.

Glad it helps you out, Juncici. This is actually a minor form of therapy for writing in-character- it's helpful for figuring out how they'll develop or react in certain situations as well.

Here ya go, Ziraulo!

Then I'm glad I can write it so you can like it, A Midsummer Night's Dream. ^_-

Like I said, Hane No Zaia... this is how I figure out their next move. Glad you like it.

The "drama queen" trait is one of those aspects of Shinichi's character that you don't think about until it's pointed out to you, at which point you go "oh. Duh." I know what you mean, AngelRoy. When I was showing the school play case to a friend, he went, "wow, that guy's a drama queen." And he's right. :P