First Snow

The moon was an orb of polished silver that night, like a lonely lantern hanging proud against the abyss. There was an unfamiliar lull in the air, a wistful silence echoed by the wind, and occasionally marred by passing traffic. It was one of those quiets that came seldom in the bustling sprawl of Japan, and after centuries of watching humans make a ruckus out of everything imaginable, Sesshoumaru had learned to both cherish and dread such rare moments.

The rattling of a stray car pierced the peace, and he scoffed while watching it tumble down the road. Sighing inaudibly, his eyebrows drew into an elegant dip as he thought back to the feudal days. Silence – real silence – had existed back then. One was able to hear the slightest chirp of songbirds, the drizzle of rain over treetops, or the hum of visiting crickets. He had been able to stand on a cliff and watch the night sleep away, not once having to deal with sporadic headlights glaring into view.

And it was on one of those nights, long ago, when he met her.

Chiding himself for bringing up such memories, the demon lord ran a hand through his hair, deciding it was safe enough to drop his glamour. With a swept of his fingers, locks of silver silk flowed down his back, glimmering against the starry sky. A blue crescent materialized on his forehead, followed by magenta stripes that ran the span of his chiseled cheekbones. He closed his eyes with the briefest sign of contentment, feeling the cool breeze against his freed hair. It playfully caught a stray tress and brushed it behind his ear, just as she had done when…

Again, he shook himself from his thoughts. Dwelling on the past was only fitting for a fool, and he knew better than to succumb to weaknesses. But as the hush took hold anew, the images flashed once more, clear yet unattainable like the stars. It was one of the reasons why he longed for quiet, and at the same time, despised it. The silence stirred his mind, blurred his rations, and cracked the reign of his stony demeanor. The silence made him remember. And try as he might, the memories simply would not languish.

-

It had been so quiet that night, far too long ago, as if the forest itself had slipped into hibernation. Sesshoumaru’s form was tall amid the field of snow and branches, his billowy attire blending into the shivering white. Icicles drizzled pearls of dew upon the frosty terrain, while ventures of small critters breathed sleepy life into the air.

There came the crunch of footsteps on snow, a splash of melted ice, followed by the snap of twigs. He detected Kagome’s scent long before he neared her, wisps of soft jasmine and lily lingering idly in his nostrils. She caught sight of him, doe eyes widening like a startled deer, before sprinting to a new direction.

Too late.

He was upon her in half a heartbeat, arms outstretched to wrap around her waist and pulled her to him.

“Going somewhere?” he asked, his breath warm against her cheeks. The girl attempted to wiggle her way out, but after a few unsuccessful tries, she huffed a sigh in disappointment.

“I was,” she said in between pants, slanting a pouted glare, “until someone decided to ruin everything.”

A soft chuckle purred from deep within his broad chest, so rich and melodic a sound that briefly, it dissolved her anger. He drew her closer and dipped his head. “Little mouse, you know you can’t escape. Besides, haven’t I instructed you not to venture into the woods alone?”

Again, she attempted what he thought was a rather unconvincing scowl. “It’s the first snowfall of the year; I wanted to see it from the cliff.”

“Then where are your guards? They were assigned to accompany you.”

“Apparently sake can put even the most hardheaded demon-watch to sleep.”

“Mouse…” his tone was low in warning, but it held the edge of amusement.

Her lips lifted. “This is all part of my plan, you see.” Sesshoumaru responded with an inquisitive dip of his eyebrow. She tilted her head and continued, “I wanted you to come out…there’s something I must show you.”

“A simple request would have made do. You need not scheme an entire escape.”

She smiled again, the corners of her mouth proclaiming her mischief. “I know, but it’s to see if you could find me.”

He gave what was another deep chuckle, brushing his lips along the sweep of her cheek. When he drew back, his eyes were dark and molten as he focused on her face. “You know I’ll always find you.”

-

Thick lashes lifted to reveal a pair of golden orbs, icy flames burning intently into the flurry of dark snow. For a moment, between the briefest second of weakness and pain, he let the memories swallow him. Ebony hair, sapphire eyes, and lips of ruby red. He could recall every detail, every trickle of time spent with her. Centuries failed to erode the illusions of her face, so very pristine but were never real.

And just when he allowed his lapse of control to take over, Sesshoumaru swiftly banished the thoughts away. Enough. He was done with mourning, he was done with love. He was alone now, as he had been and as he always would. She would not return.

Nevertheless, he settled back against the base of a venerable cedar and waited. Part of the trunk was worn away, its barks chafed to follow the imprint of his back. Foolish but inexorable hope had turned it into a tradition – he would wait at this spot through the first snowfalls of each year, through centuries upon centuries of barren indifference. He knew she would not appear; he knew this year, like the countless many before, would yield no result, no miracle of fate that might bring her back. He knew he was damned to be alone.

And yet he waited.

-

Kagome had taken hold of his hand, frail human fingers wrapped over venomous claws. He inquired their destination, of which she answered with a smile and a twinkle in her eyes.

She led him through the alabaster forest, passing branches that bowed to the weight of winter’s first storm. The wind traced their footsteps and beckoned them onward, murmuring riddles with its cold ancient tongue. Frost-laden shrubs and silvery trees gave way to a cliff high over the woodlands below, a span of ice bitten grass surrounded by saplings and the open air.

They continued until they neared the edge of the clearing, where the treetops beneath looked no more than specks of dark mote. She paused and with a giggle, raised her arms toward the sky in wonder, feeling the flakes caress her skin. Her laughter was of pure felicity, as if she had never encountered them before.

He bade the scenery little attention, for his focus was aimed solely on the human girl beside him. One small slip, one misplaced step, and she could fall over. Alas, how utterly splendid: a great demon lord half-bombarding himself with the welfare of a mortal.

But he had no control over such alien sentiments. Indeed, when it came to her, he had no control over anything.

“Is this what you wanted to show me?” he asked.

She fixed her eyes at him, lips lifting with the mirth of secrecy. “Somewhat, but there’s more.”

“And that is?”

Again, she flashed that elfin grin before taking a few paces forward, turning her back against him. She did not speak for some time, allowing a thin silence to fall with the snow. Finally, he heard the intake of a deep breath and then her voice washed over, musing and somewhat wistful.

“A traveler once told me a tale of two star-crossed lovers,” she began, her words so soft they mirrored a whisper. “They met under the first fall of winter and proclaimed their feelings. They were the truth and flesh of soul mates, but fate was cruel – fate is always cruel.

It ripped them apart and cast them to each ends of the world, their reunion forbidden by the very boundary of time. Nonetheless, it is said that not one try could wane their love. It grew deep into eternity, to be echoed by the wind that wails their separation and the snow that weeps for their heartaches…”

She trailed off while Sesshoumaru contemplated. He was unused to such stories of woe and could not quite find his bearing. “That is a rather fantastical story.”

“Fantastical, yes,” Kagome breathed, still refusing to face him. “Most likely conjured by some love struck fool.”

“But you believe it.” It was more of a statement than a question.

She took another step forward, the front of her feet dangling off the outskirt. Out of reflex or concern, his arms shot forward to brace her.

She chuckled as she swayed to meet his gaze again, amusement dancing in her eyes. “You worrywart.”

The demon extended a dignified scowl.

However, her expression dimmed once more and she turned away. “The story is farfetched, though I want it to be true. I want to believe such a love is possible.”

“And is it?” He was so near his breath grazed the back of her neck.

“I don’t know,” she murmured. “But it’s said that if a couple confesses under the veil of the first snow, not even death will be able to separate them.”

Had he been confused before, he was short of replies now.

“And should their love be true, they will always find each other again. Time becomes a feeble opponent, for fate will reunite them anew.” Her head tilted slightly, and with a knowing smile, she asked, “Do you believe that? Do you believe in fate?”

The concept of predetermined destiny never grasped him. Everything happened through careful planning, deliberate moves, and foreseeable consequences. There were no divine puppeteers or irreversible paths; indeed, he did not believe.

“No.”

“You’re hopeless,” she chuckled. A sudden gust of wind picked up then, bringing along rifts of snow that shimmered like crystals over their heads. She turned to face him squarely, her small frame etched by the dusk of night. Sapphire eyes locked his, brimming with more hope and feelings than he could name. Lips parted and it was there, under the starry heavens, softly aglow over two time-crossed fates, her words shattered the moonlight.

“But I do...”

She had proclaimed her love afterwards. That night became her first confession, followed by the many she would repeat during the days and winters of the years they were together. A small, foolish part of him held onto those words, carving into memory each intonation and pitch until they rang clear as a bell. He knew no part of the tale was true, nor would it ever be. Nonetheless, an even more senseless scrap of him had hoped.

And hoped.

Time sped up after that. Years turned to decades and age began its grisly ravage. He stayed immortal; she stayed human. The lines on her face grew deeper, but no less beautiful. Her hair lost its shine, though no shift of pace could dull the glint in her eyes. Tenseiga cured her illnesses and wounds; however, even a sword of magical healing could not remedy time.

And it was nearing the end that day, yet neither had acknowledged it out loud, with her bed-ridden as he stood nearby, Tenseiga raised in hopes of prolonging every last second. Kagome had gazed at him from beneath her lashes and rested a hand on his arm, just when he was about to bring the sword down. She shook her head, and all words were lost between them while her hooded eyes pleaded silently.

He could refuse her nothing.

Sesshoumaru returned the blade to its sheath and brushed her lips with a soft kiss. She gave a weak smile, her breath lapsing into shallow staccatos.

“Death cannot separate us.” Her voice was rasped now, a fleeting whisper of what once was.

He nodded his reply, unsure of what needed to be said. Time settled to a wait as he cradled her in his arms, her brittle frame almost weightless and unreal. It did not take long though – nothing ever did, and even death refused to grant more time.

She left him as the clouds outside gave way, bringing about the first glaze of winter that nestled the grounds and left him cold and shivering.

-

Centuries had past since then; nevertheless, the foolish part of him resolved to wait. There was no outcome to hope for and nothing to return to, but still he bided.

Through the empty nights and heartless winters, through the snow that was no longer beautiful, he lingered with the curse of immortality. Perhaps, he had fallen for the tale of the ill-fated lovers, of fanciful reunions and fairytale endings. Perhaps, it was his way of keeping her words alive.

Perhaps, even a callous demon might know of hope.

Regardless of his purpose or lack thereof, another year went by as the flurries fell, where up on that cliff, with the landscapes crumbling into the distance, he settled once more to await a fate he did not believe in.

He must have dozed off on that one winter though, for when he came to, the night had waned to reveal ribbons of crimson and gold, streaking the sky with a faucet of shimmering hues. Snowflakes drizzled the trees and cocooned the grounds, and everything was a cascade of ivory with no beginning or end.

He started off the grass in preparation to leave, and it was then that he noticed her – a little girl, a black haired girl, standing several feet away.

She must have been no older than six, with her pudgy cheeks and snow reaching up to her knees. Large round eyes peered back at him, startling blue hues brimming with childlike curiosity. She displayed no weariness or caution, but looked almost with concentration, as if trying to recall something buried away.

Sapphire eyes.

“Hullo.” She took a step forward, her grin showing off a gap between her teeth. The wind carried her scent, faint wasps of nostalgic familiarity.

Jasmine and lily.

“You have white hair, just like grandpa,” she giggled, not at all aware of his astonishment. “Are you as old as him?”

Ebony tresses.

“What’s your name?”

Mouse.

He must have stood in dumbfoundment longer than his pride permitted, for her eyes began to slant with worry. She stumbled her way through the snow until she stood mere inches from him, a chubby palm resting against his forehead.

“Are you alright? You shouldn’t be sleeping in the cold…Mommy said it’s bad for your health.”

Her touch snapped him to his senses. He flinched away, part from shock and part from realization that she was real. He found himself without replies, thoughts tangled with incoherency and bewilderment. To think, he once ended entire wars with a single command, brought down enemies with one flick of a word; yet when it came to a child, he was rendered speechless.

How very uncharacteristic.

“My name,” he finally managed through a haze of disbelief, “is Sesshoumaru.”

“Sesshou…Sesshy,” she repeated with a stately tone, as if deciding that was to be his cognomen from now on. “What are you doing?”

Even in another life, she was still bubbling with questions.

“I’m…waiting.”

“For whom?” Her eyes were ovals of relentless interest.

For you.

“For a friend.” He left it at that.

She nodded as if satisfied with his curt responses. Her eyes regarded him with excitement and utter trust, not the least bit taken of the stranger’s rather pointed nails and colorful tattoos. “Well Sesshy, if you’re waiting for a friend, then I’ll be your friend.” She held out a pudgy hand. “My name is Kagome.”

Maybe it was a trick of the light, but for a moment, just when the sun was spreading over the treetops, the planes of her face sharpened to reveal the beauty she would grow into. He found himself staring into a memory, a reflection once lost to grim death.

Suddenly, she looked years older and no less familiar. “Do you believe in fate?”

The question resonated. Yes, he had heard it before, much too long ago. He remembered what his answer was and, until mere instances ago, had always been. But time had a tendency of sparing nothing unchanged, and perchance, even the greatest of demons must succumb to alterations every now and then.

He stared at the outstretched arm, marveling its small size and impossible delicacy. Hesitantly, with great care, he covered it with his own. And just maybe, for the first time in countless years, Sesshoumaru found himself at awe again by the sight of snow.

“Yes,” he whispered. “Yes, I do.”

-

A/N: *hugs* thanks for reading! This story took a whole new direction than I had planned and originally, I had no intentions of giving it a happy ending. But I guess happy endings are good too once in a while…Thanks again for reading, and please leave a review.