Title: Will It Be Me?

Author: Megan Faye

Rated: Teen/R

Disclaimer: I don't own Rent or NBC's Kristin. And yes, I know that Kristin Chenoweth and Idina Menzel aren't sleeping together, and they never have or will. This is fanfiction only!

NOTE: The pictures they talk about are pictures of Chenzel floating around the net. I changed a few details about location of pictures, but tried to describe the posing as the same.

"Ugh." Maureen stared into the mirror. She looked tired, sad, scared, and more alone than she cared to think about. It had only been two weeks since Kristin left to tour with the play she'd been cast in, but Maureen hadn't slept very much. She couldn't wander around the big apartment Tommy had set them up with; it was too lonely. She had moved back home.

"Sweet heart, we need to have a little talk," Nancy called into the bathroom.

"Mom-" Maureen started, but thought better of it. She finished brushing her hair before thumping down the stairs.

"Sit down and have a cup of coffee, and listen." Maureen nodded and dropped into a chair at the dinner table. "Maureen, she did not leave you. Its different than with Mark. Its different than with Joanne. Kristin will be back. You talk on the phone before every rehearsal so far. She texts you a hundred times a day. Kristin loves you-"

"She broke it off with me last night," Maureen whispered, eyes pooling with tears. "She....she said that I was not being understanding, and that if I couldn't be supportive, than we were through." Nancy moved around the table and wrapped her daughter in a hug. Maureen tucked her head into her mother's hip and sighed.

"Oh, honey. Your father and I broke up twelve times while we were engaged. Why is she touring with the company?"

"So when it settles on Broadway, she'll have a better chance at keeping the part."

"Why does she want to keep the part if it settles?"

"Because she loves acting," Maureen said, small pout forming. Nancy tilted her daughter's chin up and smiled at her lovingly.

"Because she loves you, and wants to do anything she can to provide for you, keep you in a safe home, and give you the love, support, and the chance to be independent before you...get married or whatever it is you plan on doing."

"How do you know?"

"She called me this morning before you woke up, and told me about your fight. She loves you, Mo."

"She left, and told me last night that we were through. Am I supposed to forget that?" Nancy sighed heavily. She stepped away, dreading what she was about to do next; break Maureen's heart.

"Maureen Johnson, you have no drive what-so-ever to better yourself, take care of yourself, or get a job, and you never have! Protesting wasn't a career, and auditioning isn't a career. You were taking advantage of Kristin, and you know it! Joanne's money ran out 4 months ago, and you refused to work. As long as Kristin paid the bills, or Tommy had an apartment for you, everything was fine! You are going to go out there, TODAY, and Get a real job. It doesn't have to be 9-5, just something you do between auditions to make money! Your father and I can't afford to pay all of your bills while you mope around here."

"Mom-" Maureen started, tears streaming down her cheeks.

"No! Kristin gave you everything, Joanne gave you everything, and Mark gave you EVERYTHING! You can fix things with Kristin if you bring home a semi-regular pay check. Go get dressed. There's going to be a cab out front in 25 minutes. Now go!"

The rehearsal studio was the loudest during lunch. Everyone chatted over sandwiches, salads, water bottles, and the occasional box of home made cookies that someone's mother/spouse/current significant other would send. Kristin loved this little bit of down-time. She and Maureen e mailed and texted a lot, but this was a time when she could read the handwritten letters from her family, and the occasional 'Good Luck in the new city,' note from Nancy and Ed. Christmas was a few days away, and she would be flying to New York for a long weekend, and then home for a few days before returning to the show.

"Mail," came a booming voice from the door. The theater troop went silent as the 30 or so letters and various holiday cards were passed around. Several people got cookies, Kristin got her mother's Butterfinger Brownies, and there was talk of someone getting a fruit cake.

"I have a book that tells you how to properly repurpose that fruit cake, Cody," a man called out

"Fruit cake cookies. Not Fruit Cake in the traditional sense. These are much...much better," Cody called back, mouth already full of cookie.

"Kristi, got a letter for ya," the stage manager called. Kristin jogged over toward the office. He handed her the envelope. "It looked too personal to hand out over there. It was addressed to 'My bride to be, Kristi Yancy,' from 'Ms. Maureen Johnson. "I knew you were engaged, but I didn't know Mo was a she, and I thought you would rather open in private. Not many lesbians out there."

"Thank you."

"If you two are really as serious as she thinks you are," he said, pointing to the letter. "Might as well not hide it."

"Just because you didn't know, doesn't mean I'm hiding anything." Kristin opened the letter and read, smile growing with every line.

"Good news?"

"She got a job," Kristin breathed. "She's an advocate for Homeless with AIDS, to help them get into clean shelters. Its not entirely safe, but she's doing what she's meant to do. New Years Eve, 1989, she protested the building over a tent city on Ave. A. She was a protester for any cause, but none like mistreatment of homeless, or people with AIDS. This can't be easy for her," Kristin whispered. The stage manager leveled a curious glare at her. "She lost several friends to AIDS, some of whom contracted it before they even knew what it was. Part of what she's going to be doing is education."

"Sounds like very good news," he said, smiling at the short woman, who grinned. "I never would have pegged you as gay."

"That term sounds vulgar, somehow."

"Lesbian sounds better?" he asked. Kristin narrowed her eyes at him. "Look, Cody's gay, Sam's gay, Arnie-"

"Everyone knows Arnie's gay."

"Half the cast is gay men, the other half is made up of divas, and wanna-be divas. You aren't one of them. You actually have more talent than you realize-" Kristin held up her hand.

"Getting on Broadway has to do with so much more than just talent. This is just part of my road there. When I am meant to be there, I'll be there."

"Just....don't let the Diva who thinks she is leading lady walk all over your part. She's been sucking the life out of the second act all week. You'll be in New York again before you know it."

Maureen laid back on the couch and stared up at the ceiling. The apartment was spotless, dinner had been delivered, and Kristin would be in her arms any moment. When the blonde leaned over her smiling, Maureen wrapped her long arms around Kristin's thin hips.

"Missed you," Maureen whispered.

"I missed you, too, Mo." Kristin captured Maureen's lips with her own. "I have news."

"Good?"

"Sort of." Maureen smiled.

"You're leaving the tour and coming back here after you visit your parents."

"All of that's true. I'm leaving the tour, and coming back after Christmas. But I'm leaving again after New Years." Maureen opened her mouth to protest, but Kristin held up a hand. "I'll be back in March. Permanently. Much better than July, right?"

"Why aren't you coming back?"

"When we were touring near LA, a casting director was dragged to the show by his daughter, and he offered me a small part in a show. The pilot will be filmed in LA, and if its picked up, the rest will be in New York. We start production in mid February, so I do get to come back for New Year's Eve, but have to be in LA by -January 10th for pre-production." Maureen felt herself smile lightly.

"Will you go back on tour if the show doesn't get picked up?"

"No, probably not." Kristin snuggled down into Maureen's arms. "I missed this too much. I missed you too much." Maureen tilted Kristin's chin up, and kissed her deeply.

"Can we open Christmas gifts now?" Maureen asked gently. "I've been really excited for you to see what I got you."

"Me, too! I can't wait to show you what I did for you!" Kristin scrambled up and dashed off to her suitcases while Maureen went into the bedroom. Soon enough, they both were back on the couch, each holding several wrapped gifts. "You first," Kristin insisted.

"Okay." Maureen took a small gift box from Kristin and tore into the paper. Inside was a small white box, and inside that was a purple velvet box. She opened the lid and bit back a small laugh. Kristin had gotten her a necklace unlike one she'd ever seen. The chain was a shiney black/silver color, as was the outer ring of the pendant. The outer ring was a small circle surrounding a purple glass orb "Its perfect, Kristi. Help me put it on?" Kristin fastened the necklace around her lover's neck and kissed her shoulder lightly.

"You like it?"

"Its perfect," she said. "Where did you find it?"

"A street vendor in San Francisco sells them. It just looked like something you would like."

"Love. I love it. Your turn." Kristin took the small box first, but Maureen stopped her.

"That one last. Its....its different." Kristin nodded and took the bigger box. She unwrapped and opened the gift box.

"A talking picture frame?"

"I thought you were going to be away a lot longer, so I thought you'd like it."

"I love it! It can stay in my trailer," she joked. The picture was of the two of them at the park, Maureen sitting down, attempting to read, and Kristin behind her, attacking her with a hug and a huge smile, while Maureen simply grinned.

"Hit the button."

"My one attempt to be serious, and its been thwarted by a cute blonde. Figures. Love you, Kristi. Come home.....soon." Kristin laughed, and handed over a box to Maureen. She opened it, and laughed. It was a similar frame, but the picture was different. They were at a rehearsal for a play they'd worked together over the summer, which required Maureen to wear her glasses, which she hated. She was wearing workout pants, a black shirt, and had her hair straightened for the part, and Kristi chose a white baby-tee, and, for some reason, was wearing a bandanna. During their break, they'd been goofing around; Kristi was telling Maureen how beautiful her hair looked when straightened, and knelt behind her and posed, wile Maureen rolled her eyes.

"Oh my God, how did you get this?"

"Made a phone call, called in a favor. We owe someone blood for this, by the way."

"This is my favorite picture of us. You look so beautiful, Maureen! I can't wait to hold you, and tell you I love you again.."

"I love you, too, Kristin." Maureen handed her a gift bag. "This is a little lame......" she warned.

"I like lame," Kristin said as she opened the bag. Maureen's favorite shirt was folded neatly inside, along with her favorite pajama pants. "What's this?"

"To keep at your place. You had started complaining that all of your stuff was getting lost in my stuff, and now that you're living in a hotel most of the time, its just your stuff. I thought some of my things should go with you....you know, make it feel a little closer than you really are."

"Mo, that's so sweet! Here's another one for you." Maureen took the last gift and tore into it. The box was very light, and felt empty. Maureen lifted the lid. "Plane tickets to come to LA three times while I'm there. Your mom told me what weekends you work, and when you're off. They can easily be changed if we need to, but you get to come out and see me.....whenever you like."

"I've only left New York once......"

"And Oklahoma is not that big. LA is a totally different world than here or Oklahoma.

"Kris," Maureen said, gently. "This means a lot to me. Thank you." Kristin leaned in and kissed her love deeply. "Last gift."

"I can't wait to see." She opened it, and cocked her head to the side. "Seasons of Love?"

"I still have all of Mark's recording equipment, and used it over the last few weeks. Benny, Tommy, Sasha and my parents helped set up a small studio at my parent's house, and I wrote you a few songs. Mom laid down the piano tracks, Benny played guitar, base, and did some back up vocals, and Sasha even got out her violin for one song. The song 'Seasons of Love' is one that we all used to sing a lot. Me, Joanne, Mark, Collins, Angel, Roger and Mimi. You've never heard it, because we recorded it in early 1990, just before Angel got really sick. The original recording is on there, and Benny, Tommy, Sasha and I did a new version of it. Not as nice, vocally, but doesn't have-" Maureen's words were cut off by Kristin's lips covering hers. She melted into the kiss, and brushed away the tears from Kristin's cheek.

"Maureen," Kristin whispered. "Are you really ready to share this with me?"

"When you hear the song, both versions, you'll know I am."