Bronze Roses

Chapter 1: Eyes Made Of Emeralds

Disclaimer: I don’t own Hey Arnold!

Note: My stories are not for the obdurate, cold-hearted or apathetic.

A/N: If Everyone Cared by Nickelback

Happy Birthday Audra!

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“Dluow uoy ekil ot ees tahw I evah nees?”

…

It was one of those days.

Where the sun feels like it’s been in hiding for the past 3 months. Your flesh is covered with goosebumps as the chilling wind brushes against you. Your pores, closing up to keep your body’s warmth. The grass, dying from the rejection of the sun. And the temperature is low enough that your breath is visible. Yes, it was one of those days.

You would have especially noticed it if you were a certain blonde boy.

Never before had he needed to wear a jacket as thick as the one he was wearing now. And never before had he felt his stomach wring so hard.

He inhaled the frosty air and filled up his anxious lungs as he stared up at the darkening sky.

Never before had he felt so excited, and this must have been written in the stars. Him being here.

His mind wandered into a past as his emerald eyes gazed over the stars. Each one painted uniquely.

He hadn’t seen Helga for a while…well…6 months to be exact.

After she had left Hillwood… he thought and hesitated for a moment …Things had definitely changed.

Helga being gone was difficult to manage, harder than he thought.

Time and the lack of laughter, excitement, and love had made his mind flinch and his heart cringe when it brushed past his mind.

And even though it was a dull pain that lingered, unlike fresh sharp pains that he had endured when she had been with him, his mind would not falter with the subject of optimism.

His time with Helga had been no mistake, and it was the happiest time of his life, how could he ever forget? But now, that she was no longer in Hillwood, he had taken different priorities.

The Boarding House had been reaching its age of withering, and even though he hated thinking about it, so did his Grandparents.

Arnold hesitated again as he stood within the frosty aurora.

So after a while of deciding, he thought it was best to get a job, and help fix up the beloved home of several people. That, and it would help him think about other things than loneliness.

He had gotten a job at a horrible restaurant…well, if you would call it one anyways. And they served the most distinctive meals, but everyone’s favorite was Pancakes and Halibut.

He couldn’t complain though. He made enough. Enough to help his Grandparents with the Boarding House’s repairs. And some to fix up his motorcycle that had broken down mid-summer.

Arnold winced slightly to himself. And and another majority…well…to pay for unexpected expenses.

The blonde sighed as he continued to look at the blooming stars.

Yes, things had changed…but the love he had felt for one girl in particular had not, and a smile found its way back upon his face.

Overtime had paid off at the homely restaurant and despite washing several halibut crusted dishes, getting yelled at for his lack of perfection from his manager and dancing around in a chicken suit in front of the intersection, he was finally here.

The boy smiled again as he breathed in the foreign chilled air.

New York.

The state of the Big Apple, and the state in which Helga had moved to 6 months ago. He couldn’t believe he had earned enough money, and he couldn’t believe he would be able to spend a whole week with her and her family.

Arnold slightly looked down at his watch.

His plane had landed no longer than 30 minutes ago, and from a phone call earlier, Helga had agreed to come pick him up. But where was she? He could barely take the anticipation.

Not being able to see someone had its difficulties, but with someone you love? That was completely different and like most people, he treasured the possessions he had of his loved one.

It was practically a daily ritual of him waking up from his alarm, reaching over to his dresser and lightly pulling the pink ribbon off of the shelf. Lightly running it across his cheek as he inhaled the familiar aroma made his day, and eased his mind.

And he could only imagine holding the real thing.

The boy slightly coughed as the icy air bit at his throat and he felt a light tap upon his shoulder.

He hesitated for a moment, not knowing what could happen as a tourist in a foreign state, but he slowly turned around, only to find himself staring into a beautiful face.

His breathing stopped as he looked as the figure.

Her facial features were the same. The cold, highlighting rosy cheeks and ears as her golden hair slightly glistened within the frosty breeze. Her smile, as bright as the illuminant sun and never faltering. The only thing that had altered was her eyes, but he couldn’t put his finger on what it was that had changed.

The boy’s face beamed. “Helga!” he exclaimed, taking the girl into his arms and twirling her around as bystanders watched.

Her form felt the same and his smile widened when he felt her erratic heart beats, untouched.

The feeling felt so complete and overwhelming.

The girl slightly laughed to herself as he set her down. She smiled. “How was your flight?”

Arnold smile was unfathomable. “Well, I have to admit, it was rather bumpy and they charge you for everything, but it was worth it. God, I missed you…”

Helga just softly smiled as she was dressed in the same apparel as him and he lowered his face to lightly brush his lips against hers.

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“Dang! You guys have your own chauffeur?” Arnold whispered into the girl’s ear as they sat in the back seat of the sophisticated car.

She nodded. “Bob hired him as an employee and he drives us where ever we want.”

His face lit up. “How are your parents anyways? Your Dad’s business?”

She smiled. “Mom is doing great, she has been sober for about 6 months now. And Dad’s business has skyrocketed.” Her face slightly fell. “But he told me to apologize to you that he couldn’t be here when you visited. He’s at a meeting in Colorado.”

Arnold’s mind faintly flinched as her voice was slightly altered. It had a higher tone, but he tried to ignore it. “Oh, that’s not his fault. I’m sure I would be busy too if I owned a big shot electronics company.”

Helga just smiled and shrugged as the boy spoke again.

“So, do you like your new school?”

“Oh, well, yeah. The Manhattan School for Girls is a very nice school. I have made some new friends although they are really strict on work. I have to spend a lot of my hours studying.”

He smiled. “And I’m guessing they don’t serve mystery meat there either?”

She smiled and shook her head. “No, they don’t.”

Arnold slightly laughed. “I’m sure you can only imagine what Hillwood High is like without you.”

The girl slightly questioned his words.

His mind flinched again as her genuinely questioned face and he continued. “Well, you know. Lower classes start acting up without you roaming the halls, and we actually lost a game to Frostwood. Our first lost game of the year! Can you believe it?” he laughed.

Helga closed her eyes and her face wrinkled as she put her hand to her head.

Arnold’s face turned concerned. “Helga.” He placed his palm upon her shoulder. “Is something wrong?”

The girl slowly opened up her eyes and looked at her hands. “What else has happened since I’ve been gone?”

“Um…” he started at her request. “Well…there was a thing with my…” he hesitated. “Grandpa. And um…” he rolled his eyes. “Some new girl one the poetry contest this year. The first year you didn’t win since you were in the 5th grade.”

Helga hesitated as she thought about his words and winced. Her hands fell upon her head again.

Arnold’s eyes widened and he ran back to her aid. “Helga. Tell me what’s wrong. Does your head hurt?”

She slowly nodded as her teeth clenched. “Yeah…”

He looked around the moving car. “Is there aspirin anywhere?”

“It’s not aspirin I need…” she mumbled lowly.

Arnold turned back to her and she opened her eyes, looking at him. And when she spoke, her voice had returned to its former Helga tone.

The change had made his mind flinch again.

“Arnold…Is my poetry still in the old house? The..” she winced at the pain in her head and continued. “…blue one…”

He hesitated before speaking. “I…I honestly don’t know…”

With another groan from her throat, Helga spoke up rather urgently. “James. Can you stop here please?”

The man looked up from the road and into the rear view mirror. “But Miss Pataki, It’s dark and-“

“I know, I know. Tell my mother that Arnold and I went for a walk. We’ll be fine.” She retorted and the man nodded.

She looked to the blonde and spoke quietly and cautiously. “That is…if you want to.”

He nodded. Some things had definitely changed. “Yeah, sure.”

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The two walked quietly through the large park filled with people trying to enjoy the cold winter day as much as they could.

He looked to her slightly as both their hands were in their pockets. “How’s your head feeling?”

The girl sighed as she looked into the sky. “…Better. Fresh air calms me down.”

Arnold slightly looked down at his feet as they walked and he asked. “Is there…something…you want to talk about?”

Helga hesitated before responding. “Arnold…a lot…a lot has changed since I’ve left Hillwood.” She seemed lost as she spoke.

He smiled softly. “Yeah, your family has turned out fantastic.”

She shook her head as they continued to walk. “More than that…”

“Alright…” he trailed off and the girl looked at him.

“Phoebe told me your Grandpa had a stroke…why didn’t you tell me?” she asked softly.

The boy hesitated at her question because truthfully, he didn’t know it was coming. “…Helga…you even said earlier that you’re extremely busy with school work. You still have checkups for your health and…I know that…he’s fine now.”

She gritted her teeth roughly. “I should have been there for you…and I wasn’t.” she said lowly.

Arnold just stared at the girl. Something within his gut told him that something WAS wrong and something DID change about Helga G. Pataki.

She sighed, her face softening. “Arnold…I know…I know I have lied…a lot in the past…” she started. “…but…I don’t want to lie to you anymore.”

He nodded slowly and spotted a bench out of the corner of his eye. Residing under a gentle oak tree that had lost its leaves within the cold.

He gestured to it. “Why don’t we sit?”

She nodded and the two blondes sat under the large tree.

Arnold hesitated as he placed his large palm upon hers. And he felt a chill run through his spine as her hands were ice cold.

“Helga…what’s wrong…?” he asked softly. “You can tell me…”

The girl stared off into nothing as her mind raced and her eyes were blank.

Arnold’s heart throbbed at the sight, and as she slowly looked at him, with darkness and emptiness in her eyes…his stomach dropped and a gaping crevasse started forming, making his body feel horrible.

“What?” he whispered with pleading eyes.

Helga’s face slowly turned disgruntled and her teeth harshly gritted together. She spoke lowly and with disgust. “I told myself…I told myself I wouldn’t cry…”

The boy’s liquid emerald’s nearly cracked at the sight that made his breathing feel coarse with ice. “Cry about what…?”

The girl instantly looked away and pulled her hand from his, hugging her arms around her form. A large exhale came from her lungs. “Please…” she spoke barely audible for him to hear. “…I can’t take it…”

His brows furrowed into his eyes as he looked at the sight that made the emptiness ache. “Helga…” he spoke softly as he then lightly placed his hands upon her shoulders.

She instantly flinched at the touch, but softened shortly moments after.

“Helga…” he whispered again as he scooted closer. “…Look at me…”

The girl hesitated before speaking. Her voice was filled with sorrow. “I….I can’t…”

The boy then gently placed his finger tips against her cheek, softly sliding them towards her chin.

He slowly turned her face towards him, and lightly pulled the strands from her pale cheeks. It seemed as if all blood had drained from her face.

Her brows slightly twitched and her eyes remained closed as he stared into her pale face. It sent a pain down his spine…and brought up a cold memory.

“Helga…” he whispered again. “…Please open your eyes…”

The girl did as she was told and slowly opened them.

The boy’s heart broke as he looked into a blue ocean of emptiness. The seas were fading into grey and pink veins of distress strained across her eyes.

Tears slowly formed over his own as he stared at the blank, ghostly eyes of the woman that he loved.

A feeling of emptiness shot throughout his veins as he stared into the unfamiliar eyes. Eyes that didn’t belong to the girl that held his heart.

His fingers slowly dropped from her chin as reality crept into his mind…making his heart loose feeling of the horrified eyes he had stared into.

A tear escaped from his eye and slowly streamed down his cheek. “Wh…What happened...to you?”

Tears glazed over the girl’s empty eyes and streamed down her cheeks. Emotions over poured throughout her skull and body, nearly overtaking and crushing her heart. She slightly looked away and into a distant part of her fragile mind. “I…I just…” she started, her voice breaking with each word. “…couldn’t…take it…”

He stared at her intently and saturated in each of her words.

She turned to him and even though looking into her eyes made him die inside…he continued to look into them…trying to reminisce a sparkle.

“When…when we left Hillwood…6 months ago…” she started…and he could tell that she had trouble speaking.

His heart then ripped as her face wrinkled and tears spilled from her eyes. She cried through each one. “When I left you…I…broke apart…” her voice then became drastic.

Arnold’s face turned horrified at the sight and his stomach burned with the feeling of acid. Warm tears then started to run down his cheeks as he watched the girl of his heart…nearly die.

She grabbed her chest as if she had been stabbed and her bottom lip curled as the tears…coming from empty eyes…but filled with love, drip from her chin. “I would have nightmares…and wake up screaming in the middle of the night…” she coughed and her voice went a pitch higher. “..and then bawl myself back to sleep…”

He was paralyzed as he watched her sob…couldn’t touch her…couldn’t break free from the emptiness and horror that clutched and gripped at his heart.

Helga roughly bit her lip and closed her eyes as she continued. “Bob and Miriam…they sent me to therapy…to see if they could help stop my nightmares…”

Arnold’s face was stricken as he watched reality unfold in front of him.

Her face then turned disgusted as more tears dripped from her chin.

Her mouth slightly parted and a deep growl came from it. “…I’m so weak…” she spat harshly.

A spark ignited the boy’s brain back in to function and he struggled against the gaping feeling. “You are not…” he said sternly and lowly.

Her head snapped to his view and her brows furrowed into her eyes.

Her teeth clenched roughly as she then pushed her hand into her pocket and pulled something out from it.

She shoved the object and held it up, inches before his eyes.

Her blazing ghostly eyes were hard. “Look Arnold! THIS!” she exclaimed, gripping the tiny object, which was a small orange container with words written upon it. “THIS is what I have to resort to when I cry! When I scream!” she yelled again and her voice cracked while fresh tears spilled over her cheeks.

Her voice lowered some and her breathing was frantic. “Anti-depressants…” she spoke, barely audible for him to hear.

Feeling left the boy’s face as he stared at the little container filled with pills before his eyes and his breathing was coarse and heavy.

Helga slightly pulled the pills away from his eyes and her face totally fell vulnerable as the little container slipped from her damp fingers and onto the cold ground. “Arnold…” she spoke lowly. “I…am so…sick…”

At the words, a rush of boiling heat poured throughout the boy’s veins despite the frosty breeze and his teeth gritted as he stared into the ghostly seas. “You are not sick…” he said each word roughly.

She frantically shook her head as her own body fell up and down with each cry. “I am…” she choked and her voice cracked. “I am...”

Her eyes then flew open as she found her face between two stern large hands and staring into horrific emerald eyes filled with hurt and passion.

Arnold’s face was stricken with pain and fresh tears started spilling down his eyes as he stared at her. His voice was frantic and broken. “Helga. Geraldine. Pataki. You Are Not Sick!” he ended hard.

The girl’s face was horrified at the wounded face of the boy she desperately loved. She closed her eyes tightly and tried to turn away.

“LOOK AT ME!!!” he cried desperately with every emotion from his voice, flooding into her ears.

Her eyes shot open and so many tears streamed from her eyes that it stung.

Arnold’s eyes then turned blindly compassionate and his hands slightly softened but remained firm. “Now, You Listen To Me.” He spoke sternly and rough.

And her heart ached like it never had before when she saw his face break.

“You Are Not Sick.” His words poured out desperately as he dug his gaze into her eyes.

Her breathing slightly calmed as he continued but her face remained stricken within his eyes.

“There is nothing sick about you or your beautiful mind…” he spoke lowly and slightly shook his head.

“Sick…I’ll tell you about sick…” he started and his breathing picked up while he still held her face within his palms. “The world…THAT’S Whats sick! They give you pills, and tell you something’s wrong with you…they tell you to get over it…and because you cry over loved ones…YOU are the one that is sick…”

The girl’s tears slightly faded as she stared into Arnold’s vulnerable face.

His teeth then gritted and disgust ran over his face. “Then I guess I’m a SICK BASTARD for mourning over my PARENTS and waking up in the middle of the night and screaming!!!”

Helga’s hand cautiously came up and she lightly placed it upon his burning cheek.

The boy’s stricken face slowly faded and his frantic breathing slowed down.

The two stared into each other’s eyes…soaking in what desperate passion they could…and for a brief second…he saw a sparkle behind the ghost.

“Arnold…” she whispered his name and the exhausted boy slowly closed his eyes.

“Arnold…Oh, Arnold…” her voice softly whispered again, and his heart skipped a beat at the genuine sound of her vocals and touch.

The girl’s eyes winced slightly as she stared into his torn face. “Why can’t the world see through eyes like yours…?”

His tired emerald eyes slowly opened and stared into her beautiful face…some of the old Helga flickering within her skin pigment…or in her hair…

“Why can’t they see beauty in absolutely everything…? Why can’t they help people…instead of pushing them down…?” her vocals soothed softly. “Why…Why can’t they see like you…?”

His eyes winced slightly and his palm moved from her face to her hair. He swooned slightly. “Helga…”

The girl’s lost eyes looked up at him and his heart thumped again when he saw another flicker behind the ghostly clouds.

He stared intently into her eyes and stroked her cheek with his thumb. “Kiss me…” he spoke desperately. “Kiss me like Helga Pataki…not anyone else…not like the Helga holding back…or the Helga on anti-depressants…” he slightly pulled his face closer. “…Kiss me like Helga Geraldine Pataki…”

Her heart pounded tattered in her chest at his words…and her eyes slightly widened…

He continued to stare into her eyes and he didn’t move…just awaited her reaction.

‘Helga Geraldine Pataki…’ the name ran through out her head and tears came back to her eyes. “Arnold…” she said breathlessly and her breathing picked up. ‘HELGA. GERALDINE. PATAKI.’ Her palms then fell upon his face. “Oh, Arnold…”

Tears glazed over his own eyes as he broke the space between them and passionately pressed his lips against hers.

The girl returned the gesture as her hands slid between his locks and she forcefully pulled him closer.

She cried silently as she desperately kissed the boy she loved. The boy whose childhood face wonderfully haunted her mind. The boy that kept her going and the boy that she so badly wanted to be with.

Tears from both of their eyes streamed down and intertwined with their love felt kisses, dripping off of their chins.

The boy’s brows winced as he then suspended his lips and held the kiss, capturing the feeling.

She did as well, and after several moments he slightly pulled away.

The two both sat there as he then gently pressed his lips against her forehead and her tears resumed.

“Arnold…” her voice was soft. “I…I need to get off of this…medication…” she said the word rather roughly.

He nodded his head and lightly treasured the scent of her hair as he softly laid his head upon hers. “I know…”

Her face slightly wrinkled. “It’s…It’s unhealthy…and Bob and Miriam desperately want to get me off of it…”

The boy then sighed as he slightly pulled away and looked down at his beloved.

Her broken eyes slowly opened and she looked up at him. “They are going to send me to more therapy to get off of them…”

Arnold just lightly ran his fingers throughout her hair, cherishing the soft feeling it left upon his skin. “…It’s for the best…”

Helga then moved her arms down and wrapped them around his waist, pulling him close. She then softly laid her head upon his shoulder. “After this week, Arnold…I…won’t be able to see or talk with you anymore…” her voice died.

The words hit him like a sucker punch to the gut…making his insides churn and the emptiness throb…but…despite everything…he loved her more than himself…and he never wanted to see her unhealthy again.

He sighed as he then slowly wrapped his arms around her, and pulled her closer. “Helga…” he started softly. “Listen to me…I don’t want you to listen to anything negative someone says about you…whether your mind is sick or insane…or something’s wrong with you…don’t listen to them…” he lightly kissed her golden hair. “Your stronger than you think…and you’ll be able to get off this medication…you just need to find a way…even if it’s…forgetting about me…” his voice cracked.

Arnold then closed his eyes and his face became broken as he felt her tears soak within his shirt.

He held her closer and whispered into her ear. “I want you to become healthy again…Promise me you will…?”

He felt her body shake from a cry in her throat and her voice was torn. “…I promise…”

Tears slowly streamed down his cheeks but he continued to hold her firm. “…I love you so much, Helga…”

The girl’s arms tightened around his waist. “I love you so much too, Arnold…”

…

Her words floated throughout his mind…

‘I love you so much too…..I love you…’

A pair of emerald eyes shot open in the dark room, breaking the dream from his unconscious and letting it fade into only a memory.