Disclaimer: Samurai Jack belongs to Gendy Tartakovsky and the Cartoon Network. All other concepts will be right to me or their other creators as they come up.

XX. The Scotsman versus the Goblins

The morning was cool and the moors were foggy. A wet and wild mist rolled in from the surrounding highlands and covered the grassy hills in a damp, gray sea. The hall now was an island atop a perch of dirt in the middle of that sea, a lone bastion and testament to the mighty men who stayed within. From that rolling mist a windless, curious swirling occurred in places that seemed to draw ever closer to the shores of the warrior beach. The white swirls continued to encroach all the way up to the crest of the hill where the mist spilled over in waves that silently hit against the dirt.

From that frothy cover stepped out a body, a living thing, a humanoid shape squat and wide with a sword in one hand and a shield over its back. Its red eyes were shining out of the visor of its helmet. The waves of mist continued to silently roll and crash, each one guiding another of these beings to the shore in front of the hall...

Inside the hall there was a jubilant awakening of men. The first up were sure to be as silent as they pleased to gather their things and get themselves fully awake. Jack and Seth were among those first up and began a quiet chatting with the other men after them over warm cups of thick, gravy-like herbal mixtures and sides of steaming meat. They talked of their recent travels, the tale of their meeting, the quest that lay ahead of them and the demon's they have faced. So many questions led were raised by the other men, most of them concerning their near-loss in their most recent fight against the evil Devi.

“What I wanna know” a rough man with a long and thick beard began, “is why didn't ya take from him what you deserved?”

“In our hands” Jack said “such a power would be useless. Neither of us have the ability to awaken such a magic through the emotion of evil.”

“If we could” Seth said “it would certainly raise doubts about each other. The last thing we need is trust issues in such a quest.”

“Are you not suggesting” another tall, buff and incredulously voiced man began “that no human is of absolute purity? And that evil does not reside within either of you at all?”

“Certainly not” Seth said. “All men have to have a balance of that, but the evil that would be needed would surely work against the natural good that both Jack and I tend to emit.”

“I agree” Jack said. “It would be troublesome to say the least if either of us had any sort of morality issues arise from acting too much upon our inner evils. I have once tangle with such forces, my own darkness, and it nearly consumed me.”

“Nearly” the man continued “but here you sit, as gentle a man as I've ever met. Calm and collected, not a single thought of malice in you not already fostered against your justified foes, a just and good man. I don't doubt that Gem could have served you in some sense, miniscule as it may have been...”

“Regardless” Seth said, sweeping a hand through his hair, “just the thought of it would have slowed us down. We're better off limiting our magic to fire and lightning for now.”

“Even so!” a loud and slender man with a metal cap shouted, “Holding that kind of power in your hand! It must be amazing! I can't begin to speculate such power, wielded in the hands of mortal men! It's so fantastic! Romantic even!!!”

“Indeed!” another loud man called. The table roared with the spoken thoughts and excitement of men discussing their use of such power. Obviously it was a hot topic among the adventurous types that gathered around. Men who could only wield the second-best, a simulated, technology driven alternative to natures finest powers. Flamethrowers and electric-energy guns could only pale to the raw and refined simplicity of blasting an infinite amount of fire or lightning at a group of enemies.

“Think what people could do with that” an older, much more jaded man said prospectively. “Once Aku is defeated, Jack, you should invest these Gems of yours to powering machines! A singe one of those marvelous things could easily power a city and feed the masses perpetually!”

“Perhaps” Jack said, examining his docile, dormant red Gem. “The only thing required to activate them is emotion. For fire, it is a righteousness. For lightning, a spark of genius.”

“An epiphany feeling” Seth said. “The feeling that you've got it all figure out, like you know everything in the world, just that single spark of intellect.” Seth looked up and was met with a myriad of clueless faces. Obviously these weren't the kind of men who would do much of that kind of thinking, much less understand what it was to accomplish such a thought. As the men riled and stirred downstairs, picking up their brilliant conversations of battles fought and won and war they walked through to reach a beaten and battered promised reward, the Scotsman was upstairs with his wife, still talking her down from her rage of the previous night.

“You know me, bonny” he said, asserting himself as much as he could while still speaking softly to his wife. “I'm not gonna stand by and let this kind of chance just pass me over. You wouldn't do it either, if you had a sword at your side.”

“Who says I don't?” she said, pulling up a slender rapier. “You may go tonight but tomorrow, where would I be? Alone in a tower, the last place where I'd want to be with my husband gone exploring the world! And if I'm not here, who's to leave these rambunctious little hooligans from wrecking and wreaking havoc on my home?”

“They're better than all that” the Scotsman said, defending his friends and clansmen. “You know them, mostly. Moss and Betty will clean whatever mess they make and then some more if they aren't already sore. Just promise them some ale and mutton and they'll fall in line!”

“You're trying ti trick me” she said “into going with you, aren't ya?”

“Only if you want to” the Scotsman said. She turned and stood up to face him, her arms crossed and her face waiting for an explanation. “It'd be a great chance to see the world a bit better. You always complain about being in here all the time, you know. Why not come with me and Jack and his prissy little friend and get a good look at the world?” She gave this a thought, a very stern and silent, judging thought, but even in her deep analysis she couldn't reach a definite answer. She just shook her head and shrugged. Before she could voice her uncertainty, however, a metal clang hit her window. From the ground to the highest tower, a grappling hook of metal. Both husband and wife took up their arms in preparation for the inevitable assault.

“Some excitement” she said “is closer to home.”

“A bit too close for me” the Scotsman admitted as a hand clawed its way into the window. A green-skinned, stout warrior with three swords on his back and one in his hand climbed over and landed on the ground, full scrappy metal armor and leather hide on his skin, glaring them both down with his round red eyes and wide, flashy grin.

The hall doors sounded with a loud and powerful thud. A force from outside was pounding heavily to get the large, wooden doors to open. The chattering stopped all at once on the first pounding. The men stood up and walked to the door, weapons in their hands. A line of soldiers was quickly formed. The men with longer distance, those wielding throwing spears and bows and some with guns, took to the second floor and some even to the high-vaulted rafters. Jack and Seth took opposite sides of the front-most line in preparation for whatever naïve force was about to charge in.

“This doesn't bode well” a tall adventurous man said.

“Let them come!” a loud voice called. A large man with wide shoulders and a wider gut, wearing on his chest a long and dirt ridden beard where some short leafy sticks were jutting out, slammed to the ground his heavy and huge battle ax to center the attention onto himself. He was a militant, brutish barbarian of a man with wide, white eyes and a huge grin covered partially by his dirty, unwashed facial hair. “I will take them on myself if I must! This hall cannot fall to any invading forces!!!”

“Well said” another man called. Jack stepped out and pulled out his Gem of fire. He concentrated quickly and gathered up a swirling wind of flames around his fist. He sheathed his sword with his other hand and stepped back, keeping the flames tight to his hand, the heat just barely licking at his skin. He looked like he was about to throw a tightly-wound punch.

“Please” Jack said calmly, “allow me to cast the first attack. It has been too long since I was here. I feel that I must contribute a fair source of strength to this fight as a clansman.”

“Fair enough” a man said. “Let Jack give the first blow.”

“Daaaaaw!” the brutish bearded man whined. He hung his head and pouted his lip out. “I wanted to be the first into battle...” his childish whining was further exaggerated by the tears he forced out of his grimy, crusty eyes. Seth was a bit moved in disgust. The flames continued to intensify around Jack's fist, pouring from the air around the Gem, brilliant red and orange mixing together. The door still blasted out the loud thuds from the other side and began to buckle. The wooden board that bolted the doors from inside was bending at each pound the forces outside made.

All was tense and quiet. The warriors steadied their breath in preparation for the coming enemies. Then, with an explosive force, the doors were blown open and a horde of green-skinned Goblins and Orcs rushed in! Jack didn't hesitate. He didn't even view his enemies justly. With a blind and righteous fury he kicked up his powerful, destructive flame and stepped into a mighty punch. A bright-red blast of snaking streams of fire shot out and blew the entire first wave away, singing and burning the sleeve of his robe. Once all the heat and smoke cleared Jack dropped the Gem and fell to his knees.

“Jack!” Seth shouted. He quickly moved to his friend and looked at his hand. It was shaking and burning bright red. The Gem had, apparently, overheated.

“I was too rash” Jack admitted. “I burned myself with my own emotions.”

“Take a leg” Seth said, taking the Gem in his leather grip and stowing it in a protective, heat-resistant pouch. “I'll head this out.” Jack nodded, picked himself up and retreated to the back ranks. He quickly wrapped his hand in a bandage and drew his blade in his left hand. He could still fight, he was just tired. Seth took his blade, widened the distance of his feet, dipped his knees down and posed his long saber over his shoulder, left hand dominant. A cool morning wind drifted in and moved his long, silken silver hair. The next wave advanced. Stout, chattering, armored Goblins with swords, axes and all kinds of clubs were the infantry. Taller, stone-skinned Orcs wearing less but heavier armor charged in after them, some of them wearing huge shoulder pads that smaller Goblins stood on with bows and arrows.

“Let's go!” Seth shouted.

“RAAAAAAAAAGHH!!!!!!” the clan roared. The warriors went charging ahead. The marksmen up above shot arrows and bullets down, combating the Goblin forces that threatened with their own range. The numbers clashed violently. Swords met, axes cut and clubs smashed. Seth sliced down the three Goblins in front of him and leaped over them, right into the thick of the horde, and began his elegant blade dancing. He slashed in wide cutting arcs all around, sweeping slashes and curving cuts that reached on all his sides. His front was well defended and gave him the widest distance. He spun occasionally and began attacking those at his rear. Orcs and Goblins all converged to try and fight him while the clan pinched in from the other side. Soon more and more adventurous, daring warriors were in the thick with Seth and the Goblin forces were scattered and thinned greatly.

“Come on Jack!” a brave warrior said to the samurai who hung by his side. “Get up into the fight!”

“I may not be at my fullest” Jack said. He jumped, slashed apart an arrow, and landed in a pouncing position. “I think I will stick to a defensive strategy...” Jack made a giant leap up and floated in front of the archer's line of sight. The Goblins fired at him, turning their attention away from the range fighters of the clan and focusing their fire on the supreme swordsman in the air. Jack easily sliced the arrows and deflected the slugs from the crossbows, acting as a distraction that the archers and gunmen behind him used to pick off the Goblin bowmen with perfect precision.

When Jack landed he landed in the outskirts of the battle where the Goblins were retreating away from the main battle. He kicked one away, cut another's armor off and destroyed several weapons, all with only one hand. With a fierce and sudden glance he parted the enemies and forced them into a panicked retreat. Just as suddenly as it began, the second wave was defeated and the Goblins that hadn't retreated were strewn about on the floor. The men cheered and moved toward the gate to seal it up and prevent any more attacks from coming. Seth led them and was the first to look outside.

“Oh....wow” he said. Everyone else was rather speechless. Out in the moors, where the morning mist was finally clearing, a massive force of Goblins and Orcs and mercenary robots and all kinds of barbarous berserkers were gathered, all of them with a weapon to use.

“If it isn't one thing” someone said “it's got to be everything else!”

“What are you talking about?” Seth asked. Jack arrived just in time to see the scene. He calmly started assessing a strategy based on the enemies all around and let the cool breezes pass by him.

“You think we got this powerful” a clansman said “just for being pretty? We had to beat our way to the top of the guild food-chain!”

“And these are your fallen adversaries” Jack said, instantly understanding. “They have bonded together under the shared drive for revenge.”

“That's the most of it” a man said. “Let's hope they don't get that revenge.” Jack took his sword up as best he could with one hand. Seth posed with equal seriousness, equal ferocity, and the clan behind them all prepared for the war they were about to fight...

Mid afternoon. The moors were spotted with bodies and fallen siege equipment. A small fire was climbing the walls of the hall, but the loud splashes of water quickly doused them. The clansmen, who wore their garb tattered and torn from all the fighting, worked to repair their great hall, all separate but together, drifting from task to task without any interaction. While the entire clan worked to assess and undo what damages the Goblin horde had done, the true victors of the great battle stood at the top of the highest tower, looking out onto the battlefield with their swords sheathed and their arms crossed. Jack and Seth, undeniable warriors, were recognized as the truest conquerors of the battle. Their damage and actions had topped even the most powerful warrior who had taken the field that day...

Of course, during that entire battle, the Scotsman was absent. Jack and Seth now scanned the moors for signs of movement, hopefully one that they could identify as the Scotsman himself. Seth peered through a compact set of digital binoculars, scanning the field carefully.

“Anything?” Jack asked.

“Nothing” Seth answered. “You want to try?” Jack took the binoculars, inspected them quickly to assess how they worked, and placed them up to his eyes. He scanned the same ground that Seth did but paid more careful attention not to what was moving but what was no longer moving. All the bodies, if he knew his friend correctly, would surely be beaten in a signature way, most of them cut or filled with holes. He saw no tell-tale sign that the Scotsman had been going through the field at any near moment, a terrible thought to accept.

“I suppose” Jack said, lowering the binoculars “it is possible that he had fallen early in the battle.”

“Really?” Seth asked. “He didn't seem like the kind of guy who would just die like that. I mean, you know him too. He doesn't seem like that kind of guy, right?”

“No” Jack answered, looking back up to the plains. “That is what worries me. He would not fall, nor would he leave such an important battle without so much as a farewell or some kind of well-wishing utterance. He was last with his wife, was he not?”

“Right below this rampart” Seth said “is her chamber. I suppose we can peek in and check.” Jack rubbed the back of his neck nervously. Peeking in on any girl's private chamber was warrant enough for him to get ashamed, but hers!? Even if he were such a man, he doubted that he'd find much pleasure in doing it.

“We will call for her” Jack said “before we go in, lest we risk intruding on her privacy.”

“Good idea” Seth said, obviously thinking the very same thing as Jack. They climbed down the wall and made their way to the window, seeing that it was broken and the windowsill was scratched with very recent metallic marks. Jack climbed up and quickly looked around the room. It was in tatters. The walls were all marked with sword cuts and bullet holes, all from a recent and devastating fight. Jack went inside, against his instincts, and looked around. He found not the Scotsman's wife, but the Scotsman himself, sitting on the edge of a torn and beaten bed, his head hung down somberly.

“My friend” Jack said, moving toward him. “What has happened? Were you injured?”

“No lad” the Scotsman said with a heavy sadness. “I'm fine...”

“And your wife?” Jack asked. The right question to pang his heart. Jack knew his wife, and assumed not the worst but what was obvious. He clenched a fist and looked to the window. “It's been too long since the battle. They must be far away by now.”

“They've gone back already” the Scotsman said as he rose to his leg and mechanical prosthetic. “How could I have been such a lout? GAH! MY own bonny wife, captured again, and I was right there! What could I do? They were too much for her! I couldn't just stab them to death, could I? No! They were all swarming her like maggots to a...to a...”

“Fresh, salty mutton?” Seth said as he swung in. He looked in higher spirits than either of the men, which seemed to irk the teary-eyed Scotsman. “So, you know where they took her, right?”

“Of course I do” the Scotsman said, “that's what's making me eyes watery. Tain't any spice around to swell them up, is there?”

“What's stopping you from just going there and getting her back?” Seth asked.

“If that were the case” the Scotsman said “I'd be gone already, wouldn't I? It's a fortress, lads, the likes of which you can't imagine. Built from the very earthen element, guarded by insane magic and blessed by ancient, immortal druids living in the rocks and the trees that those damn, heathen Goblins and gibblets built their home out of! I can't go in if I wanted to! No entrance, no...bonny lassie-girl of me loving life...” Seth seemed to be keeping himself hopeful, but suck hopeless revelations struck him deeply. Jack, however, seemed to have a sudden idea.

“Such magic” Jack began, “sounds quite similar to another type of magic that I know of...”

“What?” the Scotsman asked. Jack simply took out his Gem and let him see it. The Scotsman was curious at first, but then the epiphany hit and Jack clutched the Gem. A light glowing flame circled his bandaged hand, burning the cloth away and staying clear of his skin.

“I believe fate is on our side” Jack said, “at least in part.”

“It's a stretch, I'll admit” Seth said, “but since when has a stretch affected our chances?”

“Alright then, lads,” the Scotsman began, “get your things together and packed up. Don't take nothing you regret with you, though. We're heading out immediately.” The determination in his voice forced his tears back into their ducts and inspired a fierce, roaring ambition in both men. The idea was obvious, and the plan was in motion. They moved out just as immediately as the Scotsman demanded, on course for the Goblin Gorge...