“Help a girl out”

Disclaimer: Negative on the ownership…..

A/N: I was really board in an English lesson and decided to write this. Something similar actually happened to me but not quite as bad as this. It’s just a random oneshot that hasn’t been beta’d so forgive any mistakes, I just had to post it coz honestly I think it’s hilarious!!! Please review, it’d really make me smile!!

Summery: CJ and Donna have some ‘girl chatting’

So here goes…

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The buzz of her cellphone radiated through the enclosed space of her office; shattering the silence and forcing her from her unconscious state.

Her eyes remained shut as her hand patted along the oak of the coffee table in search of the infuriating silver object. Once found her thumbs deftly flicked up its lid and placed it to her ear.

“CJ Cregg.” She tried tremendously hard to sound as if five seconds ago she hadn’t been fast asleep on her comfy beige couch.

“Hey CJ, its Donna,” CJ pinched the bridge of her nose and forced her sea blue orbs to slide open. Immediately they were drawn to the ticking circle which was seated perfectly on her desk. 7.05. She’d over slept. Claudia cursed inwardly as she struggled vigorously to peel herself from the warmth of the blanket that coated her lengthy body.

“Oh, Donna, hi,” She sat up and rocked her head from side to side a few times realizing that a call from Donna this early in the morning could only men two things. One: There was some sort of national emergency and she needed to brief or two: Josh had caused some sort of national emergency and she had to brief. Now that she thought about it number one was nearly always related to number two.

“Yeah, it’s me, how are you, I didn’t wake you did I?” The concern was evident in the young blonde’s voice and CJ had no trouble picturing the frown that accompanied it.

“No, no I was up what did you need? Or better yet, what did Josh do?”

Donna chuckled. “No, everything’s fine and for once I’m actually not calling about Josh.”

CJ’s mind instantaneously began to race it was very rare that Donna called her but even rarer still that her call wasn’t about Josh.

“Donna? Is everything ok? Are you ok?” Panic was slowly rising in CJ’s chest.

“No, no I’m fine.” CJ released that breath she’d unconsciously been holding in and her apprehensive body relaxed.

“Oh thank God! For a minute there I thought you might be in some trouble.”

“No, I’ve just got some free time and I thought we might catch up maybe have a little girl chatting session?” CJ smirked and let out a barely audible snort of a laugh. Only Donna would call for some ‘girl chatting’ at seven in the morning.

“Yeah, well I’ve got some time” CJ yawned out. “How’ve you been? What’s new?” CJ stood and maneuvered herself around her desk and into her chair; opening her laptop she began an inspection of her emails.

“Oh, well nothing much, Josh has me working ‘til all hours of the night on this Stackhouse thing but other than that my life is boring. How ‘bout you?”

“Yip, same old same old, oh, Danny took me to dinner last night.”

“OH, so how’d it go?” Donna smiled and dragged out her last word openly mocking CJ.

“It went good…”Reddish pink fluttered over CJ’s cheeks as she thought of the previous night. Good was definitely one word to describe last night, others would be; fantastic, earth-shattering, mind-blowing, but she wasn’t about to share that with Donna.

“Oooh!” Donna giggled and CJ was sure she was jumping excitedly up and down like a teenage girl. “So I know that tone, any chance good is code for something else?”

The blush on Claudia’s cheeks increased ten fold and she couldn’t help the butterflies that fluttered into her stomach.

“Maybe,” CJ replied coyly.

“Oh My God!! Claudia Jean Cregg, you naughty naughty girl!”

CJ giggled and cringed slightly.

“I know.” The smile had transformed into a rather impressive grin showing off her perfectly white teeth.

“So? How was it?”

“Well, we got to the restaurant and both ordered the steak with- “

“- No man, I mean the sex?!” Donna cut CJ’s sentence short.

“Donna!!” CJ shrieked with laughter.

“What? Don’t act like you didn’t know that’s what I was asking!” CJ lent back into her chair and began to sway it from side to side. Of course she’d known what Donna was referring to- after all she wasn’t five!

“Okay” CJ began. “So I did know and to answer – amazing!”

Donna screeched with excitement for her friend and CJ’s grin grew impossibly bigger.

“Ok, wow, so details and let’s start from when you got back to your place.”

“Well first of all we went back to his apartment and second I’m not about to share details of my sex life with you over the phone!”

“Oh, come on Ceej,” Donna whined. “I’m not getting any, help a girl out with just a few details?”

“Donna,” CJ complained. It wasn’t that she didn’t want to share the fantastic details of what Danny could do with his tongue other than report, with her, just that it was over the phone; making it somehow awkward.

“CJ, please, for a friend?” Donna begged knowing fill well she’d get CJ to cave.

“Fine! What do you want to know?” CJ cursed herself for caving so easily but when it came to her few close girlfriends she was just so damn easy!

“Everything!!” Donna grinned widely and pressed the receiver a little closer to her ear.

“OK, so we ate d then went back to his place,”

“Ooh exciting!”

CJ rolled her eyes at Donna’s eagerness and continued.

“Anyway, we had a couple of drinks and then one thing lead to another,” CJ took a breath almost not believing she was about to share details on how Danny ravished her the previous night over the phone.

“And then?” Donna questioned impatiently.

“Well we kissed and then somehow I went from standing fully dressed to lying underneath him in nothing but my panties.” CJ released a sigh embarrassed she was enjoying going into so much detail.

“Which ones?” Donna cut in refusing to lose any of the raunchy particulars.

“You know the black lace ones with the white trimming?”

“Oooh Kinky!”

CJ giggled. “Ok so then he took off his boxers and Donna-“

“Good?” the one word implied so much more.

“Friggin’ Great!” CJ gushed.

“SO unfair!” Donna moaned. “Ok so carry on,”

“Alright so we just kiss for a while and then-“

CJ’s eardrum was suddenly filled with the bland quietness of the dial tone. They’d been cut off.

“Hmm.” CJ wandered out loud as she set her phone down on the desk awaiting Donna’s return call.

On the second ring the phone was at her ear. Although she’d never ever admit it reliving last night as she told Donna was doing as much for her as the other woman.

“Sorry must have gotten cut off, where were we you were naked-kissing and then?”

“Oh, ok, well then we moved onto the foreplay and OH MY GOD!!! Never in my life have I had it so good!!”

“Really?” Donna asked in disbelief.

“Totally! So I thought he’d just do it, let me have it and we’d move on but he didn’t. He did everything painfully slow but OMG it was amazing! The best kind of torture!” Donna could hear the excitement in CJ’s voice and knew the golden brunette was enjoying this just as much as she was. There was a moment of silence over the receiver which was quickly taken care of.

“WELL?! Don’t stop now!!” Donna demanded almost screaming.

“Sorry,” CJ apologized. “Where was I? Oh yeah so he did everything so slowly I thought I might die right then and there. He does this thing with his tongue-“

“Donna? Donna??” Damn they’d been cut off again and for the second time CJ’s ear was filled with the sound of the dial tone.

CJ once again set the phone down and began staring it down ready to pounce on it at any second and eagerly continue their convosation.

With the first ring the phone was to her ear and she continued with her description.

“Ok so his tongue, he did this thing where he twirled it up and like slowly released it sliding over every important nerve – it was excruciating!! Then he pushed it up further and flipped it round- honestly I don’t even know how and then slowly back out again. I was shivering – had goose bumps Donna, I had goose bumps!!” There was a long pause as CJ awaited Donna’s no doubt jealous response.

“Donna?” CJ wrinkled her brow. Had they been cut off again? No, she couldn’t hear the dial tone and was that? Was that sniggering? Was the other end of the line quiet save for the soft chuckles, was she laughing?

“You know CJ, I think it’s really great that you’re so open about your sex life especially with me – a male colleague.” The sniggering continued and CJ immediately cringed. She began shrinking into her chair and covering her face in horror and shame.

“Josh?” She shut her eyes praying to God she was wrong.

“The one and only!” Josh announced proudly a massive grin plastered to his face. Just wait until the guys found out why CJ’s phone bill was so high. Josh could hear Claudia Jean whispering all sorts of bad words none of which were appropriate for children’s ears.

“So CJ?” Josh’s voice forced her to concentrate on the problem and not the on her swearing and cursing of Donna Moss.

“Yes Joshua?” Her voice was drained there was no way she was ever gonna hear the end of this.

“I was wandering, when you and I sleep together and you discover the amazing things my tongue can do – could you make sure that all female West Wing employees find out?”

CJ gritted her teeth in anger. “Screw you Joshua!”

Josh released a belly filled laugh. “Anytime anywhere baby! Anytime Anywhere!!!”

CJ could still hear his rather loud sniggering as she slammed the silver object shut.

She shook her head in complete disbelief and anger. Finally forcing herself to gaze up she realized Carol had arrived.

“CAROL??” The dark haired woman jumped at the sound of her name and quickly hurried through to CJ’s office.

“Yeah Boss?” Carol was truthfully a little nervous due to how loudly CJ’d hollowed for her.

CJ plastered a fake smile onto her face and spoke calmly masking her true emotion.

“Can you get me Donna please?”

“Do you need Josh, coz I just saw him walking this way and—“

“NO! Thank you Carol, I just need Donna. Now!”

“Ok sure.” Carol nodded and hastily evacuated the room in search of the assistant.

CJ ran her hands over her face reliving the last 20 minutes.

“Donnatella Moss – you are so dead!!”

- End -

Ok so what you think? Please please review, if you review I promise to do more humorous ones like this? Please?