Today was a day of great importance for the portly Italian plumber who was trekking merrily down the cobblestone road. The princess had requested him for a picnic at the castle, and the weather was absolutely perfect for what he had been planning to do for quite some time now. His younger twin brother had been invited as well, but he politely declined, citing that he had already made plans with another princess by the name of Daisy in the neighboring kingdom of Sarasaland. Then again, that was a positive outcome since it meant that both brothers could get some alone time with their respective dates.

After several more uneventful minutes of traversing through the Mushroom Kingdom’s castle-bound road, the mustachioed man stopped for a moment to inspect a poster that had been neatly stapled to a bulletin board. The sheet of paper was so massive that it concealed the vast majority of the other advertisements beneath it.

‘I should really read this later. I think I’m already late. The princess wouldn’t like that…’ he silently noted. He began to swivel away from the poster but stopped mid-turn as a certain bolded sentence, all in capital letters to further illustrate its intensity, caught his eye.

“ALL FIGHTERS MUST ATTEND, OR THERE WILL BE REPERCUSSIONS.”

For a brief moment, he attempted to decipher the poster’s cryptic message, but then he realized that he would have to return to it later. After all, he was late for a very important date!

()()()

The princess, clad in her usual pink attire, stood on her bedroom’s balcony. She shielded her sapphire-blue eyes from the rays of the sun as she scanned the horizon worriedly. She then looked to her left and spoke to the mushroom-person sitting next to her in a lounge chair. “Toadsworth, do you think he’s-”

The elderly Toad returned her gaze and responded to the princess’ paranoid query with a knowing smile. “My dear, you know the fellow better than that. I am willing to bet that he is simply dawdling nearby. Be patient,” he insisted with his characteristically posh accent.

The woman of royalty sighed heavily. “I suppose you’re right about that. I just hope that he-” She cut herself off mid-sentence as she spotted a familiar figure in the distance. The person was wearing a red cap branded with a trademark “M” on the front. She gently clasped a gloved hand over her heart in relief.

“Well, what do you know? The fellow really knows just when to show up, doesn’t he?” Toadsworth remarked, delighted that the princess was no longer in a state of distress.

The princess stared dreamily for a moment before snapping out of her stupor. “Oh! I’d better go greet him!” She scurried from the balcony back into her room to hastily check her appearance in her vanity’s mirror before rushing out of the bedroom, into the hallway and down the stairs.

Toadsworth stretched, yawned and hopped out of his chair to pursue the excited woman. “Oh how I wish I could recline for just a bit longer,” he joked to himself, following her after another exaggerated muscle stretch.

()()()

Only two perky Toads, each equipped with a spear, were currently on post at the front gate. The Mushroom Kingdom had not been invaded for nearly a full year now, and, as a result, the princess had let many of the guards go off on a summer vacation. There surely were no menaces that could bypass a regular set of attentive Toad guards, especially considering that its previous major threat had been taken care of.

One of the Toads, who had orange polka-dots, was placidly reading a copy of The Mushroom Kingdom Daily. A certain story seemed to have caught his interest, as evidenced by his face being nearly buried in the newspaper. His spear was casually laid down next to him, neglected. He did not seem to take too kindly to being interrupted by his partner.

“Hey Rowdy, are you sure you can be reading that while we’re on duty? I don’t think the princess would approve...”

The disgruntled guard looked up from his paper and rolled his eyes at the green-dotted Toad who stood a few mere feet away. “Puh-lease, Hammond. The biggest problem we ever have here is vandals. Those little school-aged hooligans are nothing more than snot-nosed brats who would never give us even a slight pinch of trouble! You know that!”

“Well, I suppose…”

“Thank you for realizing that,” the grumpy Rowdy snorted. He delved right back into the story he had been reading and seemed to slip into a sedated state more akin to that of the one before he had been provoked by his well-intentioned partner.

The plumber was fast approaching, dashing as quickly as his feet would carry him. Hammond, who immediately recognized the iconic figure, stiffened into a salute. Rowdy didn’t see nor hear the man who was inching closer by the second.

The man halted to a stop, bending his knees and resting his palms against them. His breathing was labored from running, and he wished he hadn’t let himself get out of shape just because a certain infamous villain was out of commission…

“Sir!” the obedient Hammond addressed the man, still saluting.

The more rebellious of the two guards peeked up from his paper to curiously glance at his partner. Raising a brow, he started to turn back to the tabloid.

“Hello…” a wheezing voice greeted in return.

Rowdy, now frightened by the prospect of a certain someone’s arrival, tossed his paper into the air. “Oh damn-!”

“How do you do, Mario?” a melodic voice inquired from behind the guards.

“Yes, we’ve been eagerly awaiting your arrival, my boy!” a familiar posh accent added.

Rowdy was now in shock. On instinct, he grabbed the newspaper in his fist and disposed of it into the moat below in an attempt to hide the evidence from his superiors. Then he recalled that he could get charged for littering, and so he dove into the moat to fetch what he had thrown.

The man’s breathing had now become less labored, and he warmly smiled at the two royal figures standing before him.

“Oh my, you look exhausted! What in heaven’s name happened?” the posh-accented voice questioned concernedly.

Mario began to speak after he was confident that he had finally caught his breath. “I’m-a okay, Toadsworth,” he replied. “Just-a had a little-a…run.” He then focused his attention on the beautiful woman. He semi-consciously fingered an object in his pocket before opening his mouth to speak once more. “I’m-a sorry if I’m-a late, Peach.”

“Oh, don’t be, Mario!” Peach replied understandingly, lacing her fingers together upon the front of her dress and shaking her head gently. “I’m just glad you made it. Now, come on. Let’s go into the courtyard for our picnic!”

“You’ve-a got it, princess!”

The trio entered the castle to start their planned picnic in the courtyard. All along, Hammond had stayed in his saluting position, only slumping back into a less rigid posture when all three were out of view.

“Whew! Saluting is hard work, isn’t it, Rowdy?” Hammond commented as he wiped his brow with the back of his left hand. His eyes darted around when he received no reply. “Uh…Rowdy?”

Just then, a sopping-wet guard with shredded clothing and what appeared to be mild bite wounds emerged from the water, equally drenched newspaper in hand, as he shivered and heaved a sigh of contempt.

“Whoa! What happened to you?!” Hammond asked incredulously, the expression on his face indicating that he had not even been aware of his partner’s absence.

“Let’s just say that the piranhas were on the prowl, as usual, and they mistook me for an intruder,” Rowdy grimly explained, crawling back to his assigned post on all fours before collapsing.

Hammond, astonished at the sight of his comrade, debated on whether to summon a medic before something distracted him from the thought; a drop of rain had pecked him on the cheek, and he concluded that it meant that a storm was in the works! As a guard, it was his duty to inform the princess of any danger, and he knew that damp potato salad was no laughing matter! Wordlessly, he scampered off towards the courtyard, leaving his fallen comrade to keep watch of the front gate on his own.

A few moments later, a group of fifth-graders began making their way towards the castle front. Their grubby hands were clenched around cans of spray paint. They took one look at the mostly-unconscious guard and knew that this time they were going to have themselves one heck of an easy time vandalizing the castle.

()()()

Meanwhile, in the courtyard, Mario, Peach and Toadsworth were passing around various refreshments on top of an all but too stereotypical red-and-white-checkered blanket. All were pleasantly conversing amongst each other and chortling at cheesy jokes- no doubt the result of a glass or two of wine- before being cut off by the panicking Hammond.

“Guys! Guys!” the terrified guard yelped as he sped towards the trio. When he reached them, he began hopping up and down, alternating between each foot, unable to contain his overabundance of nervous energy.

“What is it, Hammond?” Peach queried, startled and confused by her guard’s outburst.

“T-the sky! Look at the sky!” the guard screeched, pointing upwards.

Upon Hammonds’s request, the three picnickers glanced in the direction of the sky.

“Oh! It appears as if it is about to pour!” Toadsworth noted. “We’d better move our food and beverages inside at once!”

The pair of humans and Toads each volunteered their efforts by hurriedly packing the scrumptious snacks inside a basket.

“Thank you, young man. You’re quite an observant guard, unlike some of the others we’ve employed around here. They could learn a thing or two from you!” Toadsworth rubbed his chin with his thumb and index finger, seeming to contemplate something. “Perhaps a promotion is in order?”

The little guard seemed more than thrilled at the elder Toad’s proposition. “W-wow! Th-thanks!” He abashedly rubbed the back of his head with an outstretched palm.

“Come inside with us, and we’ll discuss the matter further,” Peach suggested, standing up with the picnic basket in tow and motioning for the others to follow.

As they entered the inside of the castle, Peach cupped her free hand against one side of her mouth, preparing to issue an order, albeit in a kind fashion. “I will need the dining room table set up immediately! Thank you!”

Three young Toad-maid sisters rushed from their upstairs rooms and followed the four friends into the dining room to quickly prepare a meal setting. Within minutes, the table had been fully set with plates, utensils and other relative dining materials.

Peach seemed very much pleased with the table. “Thank you, girls! You did a wonderful job as usual!”

A bold pink polka-dotted maid bowed. “Anytime, princess.” She skipped cheerfully out of the room, followed by her shier and quieter purple and yellow-dotted sisters.

Peach was the first to sit in the plush dining room chair, followed by Toadsworth and then Mario. Hammond seemed hesitant at first, but then decided to plop down into the chair as well.

“So, uh…shall we have another glass of chardonnay?” Toadsworth chuckled, already beginning to fill everyone’s wine glass with the alcoholic beverage.

()()()

Hours passed, and the foursome seemed to be having an excellent time chatting, with the exception of Mario, who seemed to become increasingly anxious. He once again fingered the object in his pocket. Even the alcohol wasn’t enough to suppress his nerves, and the other three seemed to pick up on it.

“Oh! Uh, would you like to talk to the princess in private, Mister Mario?” Toadsworth asked, prodding his elbow against Hammond.

Mario nodded wordlessly, finally removing his hand from his pocket.

“Very well!” Toadsworth immediately dragged himself and his fellow Toad from the room to leave the two humans by themselves. Hammond protested loudly, but the elder Toad shushed the guard and decided to pay a visit to the recreation room to distract him.

Peach cocked her head, intrigued by the comedic Toad duo, but then turned her attention back to the plump plumber. “What is it, Mario?”

“P-p-p-princess…” Mario stuttered, struggling to keep his eyes focused on Peach’s. “I…I…I-a…w-wanted to ask-a you…if…” He began to pull the object out of the confines of his right pocket, partially revealing a small, dark velvet box. He took a deep breath in a pathetic attempt to regain his composure. “…If…if…you would…if you…would…”

Peach’s line of vision was still within that of Mario’s stubbly visage, so she was oblivious as to what the plumber-turned-hero was intending to do.

“If…you…would…would…”

“Mario, you look faint. Why don’t you sit dow-”

Out of the blue, a horrendous tremor shook the room, bowling both the unsuspecting princess and plumber over.

“What was that?!” both questioned in unison, exchanging shocked expressions.

The glistening chandelier’s screws were coming undone from the rough vibrations, and Mario, knowing full well that Toadsworth would have a fit- in turn, making Peach upset- stood atop the table, attempting to prevent the expensive, heavy and beautiful ceiling accessory from collapsing and shattering into pieces. Additionally, it served to distract both of them from the awkwardness that had been conjured previously.

“M-Mario!” Peach gasped, climbing onto the table and grabbing him by the shoulders. “W-what are you doing?!”

He raised his arms up, cursing his height- or lack thereof- for not allowing him to touch more than the very edges of the light fixture. “S-saving t-this…for you…”

“Forget it, Mario! Our safety is more important, and you could really get hur-”

In one swift motion, the massive ornament plummeted from the ceiling, which could no longer bear the weight of the chandelier, crushing the two unfortunate victims standing beneath it.

()()()

Several minutes later, Toadsworth and Hammond rushed in, forgetting that they were still carrying pool cues from their game. They, too, had felt the shock waves.

Toadsworth was the first to speak. “Princess! Mister Mario! Are you alri-”

The two Toads began to stammer in horror upon being met with the visual of the limp bodies of Princess Peach and Mario. Both were bloodied from the impact, and rivulets of the red liquid were cascading down from the tabletop onto the soft carpet below.

“Oh…my,” the elder Toad squeaked, fainting on the spot from the sight that was too much for him to bear.

Hammond dropped to his knees, hands shaking, and managed to produce a piercing caterwaul which alerted several castle attendants to the scene.

The attendants quickly scrambled in, unable to comprehend what could’ve occurred, until they had viewed the terrible sight for themselves.

An older maid turned to Hammond. “W-what h-happened?!” she sputtered.

“I g-guess th-there was…an accident…” the guard responded.

“This…is…no…accident!” a voice coughed from the floor.

Everyone shifted their gaze from the pair of unsightly, bloody bodies to be met with a very weak and pale Toadsworth.

The old maid knelt on the ground and placed her hands on his quivering shoulders. “Toadsworth, please don’t exert yourself-”

“SILENCE!” The old Toad shouted, catching the other attendants in the room off-guard. “T-this is…unacceptable. I…cannot believe this could happen. I…I am…appalled. WHO LEFT THE PRINCESS UNATTENDED?! I DEMAND AN ANSWER-”

“You did.” Hammond swallowed the lump in his throat as he replied to his superior. “Remember? You…wanted to leave the two of them alone so that Mario could-”

Toadsworth lowered his head. “So I did.”

Silence shrouded the room for what seemed like an eternity before the elderly mushroom-man found the courage to speak again.

“I…just can’t believe…that all my planning…” he whimpered. “…All my planning…and then this happens! How is this possible?!” he lashed out, pounding the floor with a furious fist.

The old maid who still had her hand on his shoulder squeezed it gently. “My dear Toadsworth, there was no way you knew this would happen. No amount of planning can prevent these kinds of events. There was nothing you or anyone else could’ve done. It’s tragic, but it happened. We’ll just have to…have to…” She collapsed to the floor on her knees alongside the elderly mushroom-man and began to sob with him, unable to complete her sentence.

“What will become of the Mushroom Kingdom without its dear princess?” Toadsworth asked, choking on his words. “How will we all get by? We’re doomed! Doomed!”

The other attendants in the room watched helplessly as the somber pair wailed. Most of the servants had already been shedding tears of their own. The remaining Toads who were still in shock finally broke down and cried with their fellow attendants. All the sorrowful Toads could do now on this fateful day was hold and console each other for any comfort and support they could salvage.