And the story starts. Finally.

Vera Misham sat at her desk, looking and feeling terrified. She couldn’t see for the life of her why or how she had agreed to do this job, but Trucy had insisted, and well, here she was. She was trying so hard not to bite her nails and began to furiously draw on a sketchpad to calm herself down. First she drew Apollo, doing one of his flamboyant hand gestures, and then she drew Trucy, happy and smiling and waving a wand, with a puppet attached to her waist. The third picture drawn was of Phoenix, wearing his suit and sitting in his office, trying to sort out fire notices. Then she drew Jay, looking dejectedly at a burnt dish of something that looked like spaghetti carbonara, his dark hair falling over his ears instead of the way it was usually stuck up over them. The fifth picture took a different note, and she didn’t even realise who she was drawing until she looked properly. With a squeak of surprise, she dropped the notebook and stared at it. Glaring up at her from the page was Kristoph Gavin. Telling herself she was being silly, she picked up the note book, tore out the page with him on, and threw it out. She drew herself instead and absentmindedly began to design a new headscarf. She was getting absorbed into it when she was bought back to reality by a sharp “Ding!” of the bell and a man’s voice saying “Madam!” Vera jumped.

“I...I’m sorry Sir –“

“I should think so! I’ve been standing there for a good two minutes! I’ve a good mind to go to another hotel!” The man glared while Vera stared at him.

“H...How may I help you?” Vera asked, drawing back slightly.

“I am supposed to be staying here. I have a reservation, although if this is how all the staff behave, I have several more.” Vera didn’t think they were going to be room reservations either. She decided to be polite.

“Of course Sir. If you just give me your name, I...I’ll be happy to tell you which your room is. Please, excuse me.” The man took a deep breath and Vera was afraid he would shout at her again. All he said however was

“My name is Exigeant Etbruyant. Now tell me where I’m sleeping, and be quick about it, girl!” Mr. Etbruyant stood there while Vera checked the booking schedule.

“R...Room S...seventeen...Sir. The restaurant serves breakfast from six O’clock in the morning until eight O’clock in the morning a...and an evening meal from six in the evening until nine in the evening... enjoy your stay.” All the while Mr. Etbruyant had stood over her. Now he looked like he was waiting for something.

“And when, you silly girl, is lunch?” He asked. Vera was confused.

“L...lunch? I...I... don’t think we serve... lunch...” Vera trailed off at the look on Exigeant’s face.

“No lunch. You’re telling me that this hotel doesn’t serve lunch. Are you sure?”

“N...not entirely...”

“Not entirely? You’re not entirely sure if your own hotel serves lunch or not?! You are absolutely useless! I’ve a good mind to complain!” Vera hunched over and tried not to bite her nails. “Well don’t just stand there, you stupid girl! Go and find out!” Vera ran to find Jay, Apollo or Phoenix. Trucy and Pearl were at school. She found Jay first.

“There is a man... in the lobby... who wants to know if we serve lunch.” Jay thought for a bit.

“I could probably organise a salad bar.” He said after a while.

“Ok... Thank you.” Said Vera, leaving for the lobby, where she found Mr. Etbruyant staring at the clock, timing her.

“Do you realise, you good for nothing receptionist, that you’ve been gone a full seven minutes and thirty-four seconds? You’re lucky I’m a patient man. Most would have switched to another, more efficient hotel by now. Your answer had better be good.” He folded his arms and glared, his arms folded.

“There... There is a self service salad bar in the restaurant from twelve noon until one thirty in the afternoon. O...Once again, enjoy your stay.” Vera gave him the sweetest smile she could muster before he turned to leave. His last words to her were

“And I suggest you hurry up with your job next time. Not exactly worker of the century, are you?” Then he left.

Etbruyant proved to be a problem for the entirety of his stay. There was nothing he couldn’t find fault with. He had arrived on a Wednesday morning, and around mid morning on Thursday he had marched up to Vera’s desk and demanded her full attention, regardless of the fact that she was on the phone to a woman who was trying to make a reservation for a family that Vera could hear through the phone.

“Now listen here girl. Quite frankly –“

“Yes... w...we have some spare rooms on those dates.”

“Yes... They are family rooms.... Thank you. We’ll... We’ll be seeing you then.” Vera hung up. She looked into the face of Exigeant Etbruyant and recoiled, terrified.

“Listen to me! I am appalled at the service at this establishment. Yesterday evening, I was waited on by a sixteen year old girl who took a full fifteen minutes to arrive with my dish. You’re lucky I’m a patient man. Most would have gone to another restaurant. The girl on stage was wearing a skirt that in my opinion was far too short. I’ve a good mind to complain to the manager. Furthermore, I was displeased by her manner this morning while she was serving me breakfast; I believe her manner was inappropriate for seven in the morning. And now you do not listen to me when I ask for your attention. I hope you will take my complaints into due consideration.” He swept out, leaving Vera trying not to bite her nails down to the quick. Once again, she picked up her sketchbook and began to draw.

The next day, when Pearl was tidying his room, he walked in on her mopping the floor in his bathroom.

“So you’re the maid here too? Hmmph. Well, look here, girl, I expect my room to be cleaned better than this in future. The floor is filthy and my pillows were not replaced. What have you got to say for yourself?” Pearl looked at him blankly.

“The floor is fine, Sir, and you didn’t ask for your pillows to be replaced. Would you like them to be?”

“Well, yes, I would. As I believe I made perfectly obvious just now. Mind your manners.” Pearl nodded.

“I’ll see to it directly.” She said, going to find the pillows. She came back with the pillows, finished cleaning the rooms, and flopped down in the Kitchen, where Jay was working on somebody’s dinner. Trucy was preparing for her show, which began in twenty minutes.

“Ugh! Trucy, can you believe him? Look at this floor, it’s filthy, get me some more pillows! I want some serious words with him; he must be driving Vera to distraction.” Trucy looked up from the fastening on her cape, which she was repairing.

“Who?” She said.

“Mr. Etbruyant. The man that gave you the lecture on appropriate skirt length and time taken to send him his meals yesterday.” Trucy nodded sagely.

“Oh.” She said. “Him.” She thought for a bit. “We’ve got to get rid of him.”Giving a mischievous giggle, she opened up her mouth to propose an idea when she heard Apollo announce her, picked up her props, and left for the stage.

And so the fun began. Mr. Etbruyant found his pillows stained with coffee, his meals took an hour to arrive, Trucy wore her skirts as short as she considered decent, Pearl sprinkled dust over his carpet and, after some convincing, Vera ignored him. The three girls watched him grow more and more angry as another rant was ignored and his pillows remained unchanged. Eventually, it all got too much. One morning, he marched down to the front desk, and just as Vera was steeling herself to ignore him, he simply said

“I’m leaving. Do you hear that?” Vera was so relieved she almost forgot to collect his fee. “Don’t think I shall be recommending this hotel to my friends.” He left. Vera breathed a sigh of relief, and went back to designing her headscarf.

Exigeant Etbruyant is “demanding and loud” in French. Suggestions for scenarios for future chapters would be greatly appreciated. Thanks for reading!