|Agent Sheldon Jeffrey Sands' Resignation
Author: JDLuvaSQEE PM
the title says it all. This story is based off of Jacques Cartwright's story 'Resignation'.Rated: Fiction T - English - Humor - Words: 321 - Reviews: 2 - Favs: 1 - Updated: 06-23-09 - Published: 06-19-09 - Status: Complete - id: 5150775
|A+ A- Full 3/4 1/2 Expand Tighten|
OUATIM AND AGENT SANDS ARE NOT MINE!!!!!This story is based off of Jacques Cartwright's story 'Resignation'.
Resignation Letter received from Mexico City, Mexico, November 20, 2003:
At some point in the span of my career as a CIA agent, people started to think that I was/am a sociopath. I'm gonna set the record straight right now: this is a lie. Apparently, the people who set the morals up think that anyone who doesn't have the same morals as them are crazy. I don't think so, dumb ass. People are allowed to have different morals other wise the world would be nothing but a ball of bullshit.
People thought that I must've been spanked one too many times as a kid. No. Growing up in an abusive and broken home doesn't necessarily make you nuts. The only thing it did to me was piss me off.
Luckily for me, you, my former employer, you didn't give a crap because, during my screening for the Central Intelligence Agency, you just thought that I was a smart and witty guy who was good at manipulating people and didn't give a fuck about what people think. Which is true.
Manipulating people is what I'm good at. That's why I wanted to work for the CIA in the first place. Savvy? When I was sent to that shithole across the Texas border we call Mexico, I figured that I'd be able to cause some chaos there. However, I wasn't ready for the scorching heat until I found out about the joys of tequila with lime and puerco pibil.
But, now since my return from said shithole, I'm useless to you and the CIA and I'm probably gonna get thrown out anyway, so, I'm gonna leave before that happens.
Can you dig it?
Adios and fuck off,
Sheldon Jeffrey Sands