Calmness of Dawn

By atemu-mana

I do not own VK, Hino Matsuri owns the original story and characters. This plot story however, MINE.

Chapter : Goodbye, Yuuki.

If I could ask for one thing, what do you think I would choose?

Would I choose to go on with my life in loneliness, or—

Would I choose to change the time and fix my faults?

Either way, I cannot face with the reality that when I pushed her too far, I was out of her league.

Yet, was it any of my faults? Yes.

If only I trusted her, if only I trusted myself.

If only I listen to my heart and not depend on others.

If only I become selfish for once and complete my work.

If only...

I am not a coward.

Yet, I am coward. I am.

--

I remembered clearly. The place. The event. The scene. Every single bit of it remained solid in my memories. I could never let them out from my mind. Every single time I recalled the entire process, seeing the gathering of humans and vampires to form a new treaty of humans and vampires coexisting together, a stab would always wound my heart.

As that time, I made a decision.

As that time, I made myself a fool.

As that time, I changed my entire plan.

As that time, I began to lose her.

Altogether, whose fault was it again? Mine? Or was it him?

-

Two years ago...

After the signing of peace treaty, marking the coexistence of humans and vampires.

Midnight—

“Kaname-kun, how are you?” he asked.

I silently stared at him, “I am fine, thank you, Chairman. It has been a while indeed,” I said.

He nodded. “Indeed it has. Ah, you did not bring Yuuki along. I missed her so much. How is she?”

I paused at the thought. “Yuuki? It is best if she do not come. Danger is still lurking. I don’t wish to put her in harm.”

“That’s kind of you. Do you think I’ll be able to see her?” he inquired.

I choked at the thought. “When the time’s right, I’ll probably let her out. Yuuki is well, there’s no need to worry about,” I reassured him.

“Are you sure?” he asked.

I looked at him. His face. “What are you talking about?”

“Well, I knew from the start that Yuuki is a vampire. I knew her since childhood. I knew her actions and reactions.” He paused. “Now that she has returned as a vampire, has she been feeding blood properly? Is she happy with her new life? Did anything new happen to Yuuki after everything?” he asked.

The questions were puzzling me. Was Chairman Cross asking the question as a father or could it be—

“She has not.” I said flatly.

“Eh?” he asked.

“Yuuki needs time to accept who she originally is. She lived as a human in the ten years. Most of her childhood time consisted of her human adventures and mischief. What do you want, Chairman?” I asked, stressing my words at the question.

“Ah, no. I’m just concerned.”

“You want to meet her. It’s only a year, Chairman!” my voice rose. “You asked those questions not because you’re concerned, there’s something else!”

He tried to calm me down but it was not working. “Kaname-kun! Calm down!” he scolded me. “I’m sorry if I triggered your anger. I’m just—” he paused again. “I just want to tell you what Juri-san wished for Yuuki’s future.”

“What?” I snapped. The only time I held my anger from bursting out was when I am with Yuuki. She does not deserve any of my bad side. She’s delicate.

“Juri-san wished for a happy life for her child. I do believe if Yuuki had remained as a human, she would be—”

I slammed the table next to me. Great, I broke it into half. “Yuuki will become crazy if she remained as a human! If I didn’t—”

“At least let her return to Cross Academy. She’s still human even if she’s a vampire now.”

“No, she cannot do so!”

He interrupted. “It’s not her, it’s you! Kaname, stop locking and fearing for her safety. Give her some space, please.”

“I... I cannot!”

“Yes, you can. Try it, Kaname-kun! Let her go! Let her leave and be herself!” he pressed.

I left the room immediately. Leaning against the wall, I recalled my thoughts. “Yuuki’s mine. She’s the only one for me. You cannot take her, Cross, and not even that person. I waited for this moment a long time ago. Are you going to take her away from me again?“ I asked, glaring at the man looking at me.

I’m pathetic. Seriously. I slid down to the floor and sighed.

Cross crouched and looked at me. “Kaname-kun, I’m not trying to take her away from you. I just want to fulfill Juri-san’s wish. She wanted her child to be happy, so I thought if she becomes a ‘human’, she‘d be happy. Isn’t that what Juri-san hoped from you, Kaname-kun?” he asked.

Juri? She did say something of such, but then...

“Kaname, if things get worse, please do what’s best for her. You’ll do it, won’t you?” he pleaded. His eyes sharp on me. “Observe her and decide what’s best for her. That’s all.” He rose and walked away.

The steps gradually faded and I sighed. “The treaty. What’s the point of it?” I asked desperately.

-

Two years ago...

Kuran Manor.

Evening—

“Kaname-niisama! I made something for you. You’ll eat it, won’t you?” asked Yuuki cheerfully. In her hand, she was holding a bowl.

“Yes, Yuuki. Thank you,” I said and took the bowl from her. “It smelled nice.”

She blushed and tapped her fingers together. “It’s all thanks to Aidou-senpai. He’s good in cooking,” she said.

“You sure learned a lot from him.”

“Ah, thank you, Kaname-niisama,” she said, her voice a bit low.

Realizing that I was holding a bowl in the middle of the room, she quickly led me to the dining table. She helped me place the bowl on the table, although clearly, I could do it myself but she was trying to help. I smiled at her actions. It was kind of her to do something as such.

“I’ll be right back!” she said happily. I stared at her and called her a second later. Surprisingly, she yelped. “Yes, Kaname-niisama?”

“Are you not thirsty?” I asked. She blushed at my meaning. Quickly she shook her head. I sighed. “Really? I thought of offering you something.”

She gulped. “Well, maybe a little bit thirsty,” she admitted and I smirked.

“Come here,” I said and she walked towards me.

Everything would be fine. Cross was wrong. Yuuki would be fine living as a vampire. She has started learning to feed blood. She was improving well.

Or perhaps, it was just an illusion to drift me away from my dreams?

-

A few months after that...

Still two years ago...

I stared at Yuuki as she battled fiercely with herself. “Yuuki, what’s wrong?” I asked.

“My head hurts! It’s pummeling me from inside. Aaah!” she cried, struggling with her inner self.

I was lost on what to do. What should I do?

If things get worse, do what’s best for her, Kaname.

No. I shook my head. No way would that plan happen. It would not.

“Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah!!!” she screamed as she looked around her. She was looking for an object. A prey.

That time, I was hoping that I was never there to deal with the problem. She launched herself at me, pushing me against the hard floor as she grabbed my right hand and crushed her fangs on it. I froze immediately but it only lasted for a few seconds before the actual, raw pain came rushing through my blood and passing through my body. I struggled with Yuuki but her fangs were tightly stuck to the bones of my hand. She was not only draining my blood, she was crushing my bones with the force.

“Yuuki!” I screamed, forcing her to let me go. Yet, she wouldn’t listen and continue breaking my bones one by one. This was insane. This was madness.

If things get worse, do what’s best for her, Kaname.

At first, I thought if Yuuki restrained herself from taking blood, that’s the worse thing that the Chairman meant. Now, I realized my mistake. It was not her reluctance to have my blood, but her determination to drain my blood from me. This, however, wasn’t what I described as taking blood but draining one’s blood until the person dies.

If things get worse, do what’s best for her, Kaname.

Damn, I did not expect it to be like this. Using all my forces, I flipped her backwards and pushed her against the floor. “Release!” I ordered, my voice mean and loud. When she refused, I yanked my head out from her mouth but kept her head against the floor. Groaning with pain, I looked at my crunched hand. “Yuuki, what have you done to yourself?” I asked as I cope with my pain.

Slowly, her eyes returned normal and she woke up to find herself in a blood mess. “Kaname?” she choked out. “What happened?” she asked.

“Does your head hurt?” I asked. “I’m sorry that I hit your head. I had to do it or else you won’t come back.”

She nodded. “A bit. What happened and oh my gosh, what happened to your hand?!” she rose and grasped the bloodied hand. “Did I... Did I do this?” she asked. Seeing my expression, she returned her gaze to the hand. “I’m so sorry! I did not know what happened to me! I’m sorry, Kaname. This hand, oh dear, this is the second time now.”

“It’s okay. It’ll heal soon,” I reassured her.

She started crying a while later. “What happened to me, Kaname?” she asked.

“I don’t know, Yuuki. Did you feel strange before any of this happened?” I asked.

She shook her head. “No. Maybe a few times or two. I was thirsty for blood but it never turn out like this!”

“Is that so?” I asked. Hugging her close to me, I said quietly. “Yuuki, I don’t want to do this.”

“Do what, Kaname?” she asked. Her voice sad.

“You need to leave. Go to the Chairman. He’ll give your protection,” I said. There I go, shocked her out of her wits.

“No! I want to be with you!” she said.

I shook my head. “If you stayed, who knows what will happen. I don’t want to do this either but for your safety, please go.”

“No.” She clutched my shirt and cried there. “You know I can’t live without you.”

“I don’t want to hurt you, Yuuki. That is not my intent.”

“You already did, Kaname.”

I closed my eyes and hugged her close. “I know.”

-

Now, I believed I could answer my question.

It was not the Chairman’s fault.

It was not my fault either.

What happened to Yuuki was a coincidence.

What the Chairman offered was a coincidence as well.

The only thing that resulted in this change was—

Me.

If I have decided otherwise, I would still have her.

Yet, if I decided to let her free, I already lost her.

And yes I did. I lost her.

Goodbye, Yuuki. May we meet again.

---

(TBC)

A/N: This story is inspired from chapter 50. Originally intended to make Zero as the one to press Kaname in releasing Yuuki but then, it doesn’t fit because Zero still has the hatred over vampires. So, I replaced Zero with Cross. Now it fits! Using Juri’s last wish, I decided to play with it. Remember that Juri wished her children to have a happy life. Both Kaname and Cross know about that but something is missing, what kind of life she actually wanted for her children. A life as a vampire or a life as a human? This is where the twist comes.

If you think Kaname acted OOC with Cross, I’ll say not. He’s only nice when it comes to Yuuki. Plus, we always need a dash of Kaname’s hard-boiled anger, don’t we? And a helpless Kaname too. The original plot changed as well. Instead of Yuuki restraining from taking blood, she’s crazy for blood into almost killing her victim – Kaname. Ouch.

Until then. Reviews are loved.