Disclaimer. I don’t own Star Trek Voyager, or any of the Voyager crew. If I did, I’d have a lot of fun with Seven of Nine lol. But this is my first Star Trek fic, and I’ve taken a massive leap from Final Fantasy to Star Trek.

This story includes the love between two women, so if you don’t like it, don’t read it!

Complications

Admiral Kathryn Janeway brought the glass of chilled whiskey to her lips, savouring the smell before taking a sip. “You know sis, I don’t know what the hell I was thinking coming out with you…”

Kathryn smirked gently as she looked at the smaller Janeway, Phoebe had always been the artistic one and didn’t really fancy taking up her time getting drunk when she could be working on her paintings for an upcoming exhibition. “I could have almost finished a painting the amount of time we’ve been sat here…not talking…”

“Look…sis, I didn’t exactly say you had to come out and you actually offered to come out with me.”

“I felt sorry for you.” Phoebe Janeway automatically bit her tongue after she said the wrong choice of words. Mentally cursing herself for her crude attitude, she looked down to her glass of wine and sipped it gently.

“What’s that suppose to mean?” Kathryn rested her now empty whiskey glass onto the bar before glaring at her younger sister. Did Phoebe only want to spend time with her older sister because she felt sorry for her?

The admiral scoffed to herself, she should have known; Phoebe always hated bars. This bar was the Admiral’s favourite, a small quiet tavern in the centre of Bloomington, Indiana; her home town. Unlike Phoebe, she actually liked being here.

“That came out wrong, Katie. Look I didn’t mean it like that, it’s just…you’ve been so detached from everything since you returned to us. It’s almost as if, as Voyager shut it’s engines you shut off as well. You haven’t been the same, and mom has noticed it too. We’re both worried for you.”

“Phoebe there’s no need to be worried about me, I can take care of myself. I did for seven years in the middle of the Delta Quadrant, seventy thousand light years from home. I managed, I took care of myself…I…” Kathryn sighed and raised her finger to the bartender for another whiskey. “I adaped.”

“Adapted? You’re not a machine, sis…”

Kathryn’s heart sank, taking the drink from the bartenders hand and downing it one fell swoop. Phoebe noticed the change, it was something deeper that was tearing her sister apart from the inside, and she needed to find out what it was.

“What happened? Why are you like this?”

The older Janeway sat up and turned to her sister, tears forming gently at the bottom of her blue eyes. “Sis…” Phoebe saw the tears and jumped off her stool, quickly embracing her older sibling and holding her there in a tight hug.

“Tell me what’s wrong Katie…”

2 months earlier…

“Ladies and Gentleman, welcome back home.” The crew all cheered, after seven long years, lost within the Delta Quadrant, their Captain had managed to get them home safely and in one piece.

After several minutes of everyone on the bridge shaking the Captain’s hand, including her First Officer, who congratulated her and shook her hand more vigorously than anyone else on the Bridge.

When everyone had left, the only one left on the bridge was Seven of Nine, her hands clasped firmly behind her back as she looked at her commanding officer. “Captain…”

“Please, call me Kathryn.”

Seven raised her Borg eyebrow in question before nodding gently, “Yes…Kathryn.”

“Well Seven, have you given any thought into what you’re going to do now we’re back on Earth?”

“I was planning to spend my time working at Starfleet, if they would permit me too. I understand they don’t affiliate with the Borg.”

The older woman laughed, the deep laugh that made Seven tingle in every inch of her body, “Seven you have to realize you’re not a member of the Borg anymore. You’re half human after all, I thought all the discussion’s we’ve had together and the doctor’s unrelenting nagging would have made you see that.”

Seven raised her chin and thought for a moment, considering her answer. “You’re right, Kathryn. I just find it hard to embrace my individuality, it troubles me.”

“It does?” Kathryn stepped closer to her Astronomics officer, “In what way, Seven?”

“I have managed to embrace my individuality onboard Voyager, among my new Collective, but I have no one to embrace that around when I step off this ship. I will no longer have my collective and I will be left alone, again.”

Kathryn sighed, pinching the bridge of her nose, she so desperately wanted to hold the ex-Borg in her arms and tell her she would never be alone with her nearby. Although she was no longer a member of the Crew, she still had to follow the Starfleet protocol.

“You will find a new collective within Starfleet, I’m sure you’ll fit in perfectly. It may take a while, but just like you did on Voyager, you’ll…adapt.”

Seven nodded gently and took a step toward the smaller woman, “I guess this is goodbye then, Captain.”

“I…guess it is.” Janeway stared at Seven’s lips, dying to kiss them. Her hunger grew deep inside her, but she knew she couldn’t. Seven was with Chakotay now, and she couldn’t change that. She’d missed her chance.

“Goodbye, Captain Janeway…” Seven turned her back before stopping, she knew what she was about to do was classed as wrong, both in Starfleet and within her relationship with Chakotay; but Seven knew this would be the last chance to be close to the woman who severed her from the Borg Collective and gave her back her humanity.

Seven turned to face Janeway, leaning down and gently kissing her on the lips. Kathryn was taken aback by the gentleness of the kiss, it felt like their lips weren’t even touching but the passion was there, deep within them both.

“Thank you, for everything…” Seven whispered as she pulled back before heading toward the turbo-lift.

“I’ll miss you.” The Captain replied emotionally, looking up at Seven. The ex-drone with her back to her Captain glanced the floor, pain gouging at her heart, “You will adapt.”

With that, Seven of Nine, Tertiary Adjunct of Unimatrix Zero-One was gone.

“So…this Seven…you were in love with her, sis?” Phoebe asked, finally downing the rest of her wine as she looked on at her sister. She was silently thanking that she had some wine on hand, she never though of her sister to be gay in anyway. She had been engaged to Mark Johnson after all.

Did Voyager change her that much?

“I think…I just had so many conflicting emotions going on inside me. One side was saying, take her in your arms and never let go. While the other just made me hide the feelings under my Commanding mask. Stupidly I thought it would go away after I’d left Voyager, but the feelings grew stronger…”

Kathryn downed her whiskey and stood up from her stood, stumbling slightly. Phoebe was on hand to grab her sister’s shoulder, to steady her. “Thanks Phoebe, but I think I just need to go home now. I just need to sleep and get my mind away from Seven.”

“Would you like me to walk you? I wouldn’t mind seeing mom…”

Kathryn put her hand up in objection, “No, no…it’s fine sis. You have to go home and get on with your paintings. I’ll be fine, don’t worry about me.”

Phoebe was hesitant to leave her intoxicated sister, but after further persuading by the Admiral she finally agreed. The walk home wasn’t long for Kathryn, it was twenty minutes at the most when she found herself stood at her front door. Her mother, Gretchen was most probably in bed by now, so she agreed to herself to be as quiet as humanly possible.

Firstly, she dropped her keys and muttered fuck to herself.

Secondly, she tripped on the front door mat as she walked into the house, causing a large thud to sound around the house.

Thirdly, she tripped up going up the stairs

And lastly, she bumped into her mother, who looked incredibly worried about her oldest daughter.

“Oh…I thought you were in bed, sorry…” Kathryn attempted to pass her mother, but a gentle hand on the shoulder ushered her to stop.

“Kathryn, you’ve been acting incredibly weird since you returned from space. Is everything alright?”

“Mom I’m fine… I’m just relieving from tension.” The daughter muttered as she rubbed her forehead, feeling the hangover begin.

“What? By drinking yourself to sleep every night? Kathy…this isn’t good for you.”

“What do you want me to do mom? I can’t do anything!” She raised her voice, causing her mom to jump back in shock.

“Kathryn! What is wrong with you?” Gretchen replied, raising her hands in the air at her daughter.

“Forget it.” Kathryn headed toward her room and slammed the door shut, leaving Gretchen alone in the hallway, completely at a loss to what was wrong with her daughter.

Admiral Janeway collapsed on her bed and sighed heavily, running her hand through her now tussled hair from falling countless times. “God damn it, Seven…why do you have such an effect on me…”

She turned on her side and glanced at her open computer screen, noticing a small notification at the bottom of the screen. She had a vid-message. “If this is Admiral Paris I’ll scream…”

Janeway sat up and sat at her desk, opening up the vid-message to see it was from Seven of Nine. “Seven…” She muttered, almost a whisper as she hesitated to open the message.

“Probably a invitation to her wedding.” A harsh undertone centred on the word wedding.

The Admiral clicked open the message to be greeted by Seven, the beautiful and intelligent woman who plagued all of her dreams. Her hair was down, cascading over her shoulders and chest and her smile was infectious, Kathryn couldn’t help but smile.

I take it congratulations are in order for your recent promotion. I’m sorry I couldn’t be there to witness it, I’ve been quiet busy of late and I couldn’t get away from my duties. I must say, my collective here on earth has warmed to me quite quickly. They have recently put me at the head of a project to work on a new engine, using Borg technology, it has taken up most of my time, much to Chakotay’s annoyance.

Wondered how long it would take for her to bring him up, Kathryn thought to herself.

Chakotay and I are doing efficiently, unfortunately both our schedules have us working at all hours as we rarely have time to see each other. As much as I would hate to admit this, I’m quite happy about that.

“What…?”

He has become adamant about sharing our love for one another. His wishes to copulate are always at the front of all of our arguments, and it is beginning to become ‘irritating’ as you humans would say. I don’t feel as comfortable around him as I did with you, Kathryn…

Her smouldering eyes felt as if they were penetrating Kathryn’s soul, making her heart ache. “Then why did you just leave…” Kathryn whispered, running the tip of her finger gently along Seven’s jaw line.

I miss you, dearly. And I only wish you can forgive me for leaving the way I did, but it was more efficient that I left when I did. Otherwise I wouldn’t have been able to leave you at all, Admiral. When you have the time, get back to me…please?

With that, the message ended, just as suddenly as their last meeting ended.

“Why confuse me more, Seven? Why?” She wished Seven could hear her, wished she would tell her why she had such control over every fibre of her being. She could rush into one emotion and dive into another, with a simple word from Seven.

Her fingers graced the computer as she opened a new message, addressing it to Seven of Nine; Annika Hansen. How would she feel is she used her human designation?

Before she could start, she needed a coffee, anything that would kill the alcohol in her system. Seven would know if she was drunk, it wasn’t hard to notice anyway.

After grabbing a hot black coffee from downstairs and changing into a vest top and shorts, she sat back down at her desk and took in a deep breath.

It’s very good to hear from you, I thought you had forgotten about your old Captain. It has been over two months, Seven! Thank you about my promotion, but unfortunately I’m not a big fan. As you know it’s a desk job, and we both know that I belong out there, not sat behind a desk sifting through PADD’s for the rest of my days. Between you and me, Seven, I’m thinking about demoting myself and going back to Captain. It’d be better for me, after all. It’s good news to hear about you being made the head of a project, that must be a massive step for you. I told you you’d fit in, I take it they are your new collective?

I guess I should talk about Chakotay… Janeway thought to herself, before continuing on with her message.

It’s a shame to hear about Chakotay, I didn’t see him as the sort of man to pressure you to copulate. He should know that you will when you’re ready. Otherwise I will come over and show him how to be patient. Just kidding, Seven. But it is great to hear from you, after all I have missed you… The way you left, did hurt. But I understand you did it for your benefit, I would have done the same thing in your position. But that doesn’t change the fact you…kissed me. Why did you kiss me? It’s been plaguing my dreams for the last two months, wondering why you kissed me. I’d appreciate the closure…Annika. I look forward to your reply.

She ended the message, hesitating for a second before she sent it. “God…” The weary Admiral climbed to her feet before collapsing on her childhood bed, her eyes shutting gently. Hopefully her dreams wouldn’t be plagued by Annika Hansen tonight.