Sort of goes along with the events of Braveheart. But isn't necessarily following canon. I wrote most of this before the episode aired.

House talks about the voices he's hearing, as well as the developments in his relationship with Wilson.

Another Sixty Minutes

“I want ECT.”

“For the auditory hallucinations.”

“Yes.”

"Why?"

"Huh...I didn't think that would require further explanation."

“You have no reason to think that will solve anything.”

"Hearing test revealed nothing abnormal."

"So?"

“So...the drugs obviously aren’t working.”

“You mean the antipsychotics? For all you know, they are working. There are lots of other things that could cause auditory symptoms.”

“No headaches, dizziness, loss of coordination or other neurological issues. I had a cranial MRI. No masses, no blockage or inflammation.”

“There are a dozen common infections that could present with auditory disturbances.”

“No fever, no elevated white count.”

“Could also be viral, which wouldn‘t necessarily result in either.”

“The shrink thinks it’s physiological. How backwards is that?”

“Actually I don't. What I think is that you’re looking to fix this, instead of actually dealing with it. I think you’re just trying to make it go away, as opposed to actually figuring it out.”

“…”

“We should talk about this. Tell me more about what you’re hearing.”

"..."

"Yes, I know you'd rather not. But that's precisely why you're here."

“I already told you it’s not clear. It’s just whispering…brain static.”

“Nothing audible at all?”

“No.”

“Whispering…implies speech. Which means that the source of the noise -real or imagined- is most likely a human being.”

“…”

“So is it a man or woman?"

“…”

“Whose voice do you think it is?”

“…”

“Why are you so afraid to talk about this?”

“I’m not afraid. I just don't...know.”

“Then guess."

“It…seems more male than female.”

"Mmm hmm."

"What?"

“Sounds like maybe you do know who it is, then.”

“See…this is why I don’t want to talk about it. Who it is doesn‘t matter. It’s just…my brain making a random choice.”

“Seriously doubt it. I know that you doubt it too, or you wouldn‘t be dragging your feet like this.”

“…”

“So it’s a man, someone you know…probably someone who you either don’t see anymore or someone who isn’t around anymore, meaning they’re no longer in your life. That also means they might be dead. Is it Dr. Kutner?”

“No.”

"Alvie?"

"What? No."

"Some distant relative, uncle or grandfather perhaps."

"No."

“Well then, that just leaves your dad.”

“…”

“Why didn’t you just tell me that in the first place?”

“Because of the look that’s on your face now…that oh my God, it’s therapy time look.”

“What does he say to you?”

“Nothing in particular. He’s just kind of there.”

“There how?”

“It’s like a cheap clock radio on low volume, in the back of my mind. Pretty much a metaphor for our entire relationship.”

"So he doesn't say anything in particular."

"I just said no."

"Perhaps you can't make out any complete sentences. But can you make out any words at all?"

"..."

"You're sure."

"You think if you keep asking, I'll give you a different answer?"

“How do you feel about that presence?”

“It’s creepy.”

“Creepy because of what it is or because of who it is?”

“Both.”

“I see.”

“So can I do the ECT?”

“No.”

“Why not?”

“You’ve already done labs and imaging? I’d like to see the results.”

“You're not the least bit concerned that I'm hearing voices?”

"I'm very concerned, which is why I want to see the labs and films."

"..."

"I know it’s much more fun this way. I’m sure if you thought getting struck by lightning would be an overnight solution, you’d try that too. Unfortunately, ECT has side effects. And even if it did work, the results of electroconvulsive therapy are not immediate. It wouldn't be a quick fix.”

“You think I don’t understand the procedure?”

“No, I think you don’t understand the problem. Meaning that your solution could be the wrong one.”

“Risk is minimal. And if I really do already have some sort of brain damage, then it really wouldn’t matter anyway.”

“Your brain could already be damaged, therefore you should submit yourself to a dangerous procedure that could damage it further? You’re trading the uncertainty of something for the probability of something.”

“I’m aware of that.”

"You're not being rational, which means you're being emotional, which leads me to think this is psychological and not physical."

"All the more reason you should approve the ECT."

“Tell you what…we will spend one calendar month talking about what you're hearing and if you still want to do the ECT, I’ll set it up.”

“I could easily find some less principled health professional to do the honors, preferably one who wouldn't make me talk about it.”

“I know. I’m just hoping you won’t.”

“There’s nothing left to talk about. There’s nothing you don’t already know.”

“Obviously not. Obviously there's something unresolved.”

“…”

“Why do you think your mind would specifically choose now for this to happen?”

“If I knew that, I wouldn't be asking you to stick electrodes in my brain."

“On, not in."

"..."

"What’s changed lately?”

“…”

“I’m assuming you don’t need me to point out that you've recently considered becoming romantically involved with your best friend of nearly two decades.”

“I’m not that brain damaged.”

"And you still haven't told me exactly how that went."

"How what went?"

"You said you spoke to him. I'm thinking it must have gone well."

"Why would you assume that?"

“Because the second I mentioned it, you started grinning.”

“I'm not grinning."

“Well something obviously happened, and it's eliciting a positive response. So spill.”

“..."

"You're going to make me guess. This will be fun."

"..."

"Let me see...you had sex?"

"Nope."

"You kissed?"

"No."

"Hugged?"

"No."

"What does that leave?"

"Obviously something."

"You cuddled?"

"Nope."

"Oh. You...held hands?"

“..."

"Wow."

“Don't look so surprised."

"I'm not actually. Given what I know about you both, that seems like a perfectly natural progression to me."

"..."

“And how was that?”

“It didn't suck.”

"It didn't suck. Listen to you. By the look on your face, I'd say it more than didn't suck."

"It was...nice."

“So how did that happen?”

“We were on the couch, watching a movie."

"What movie?"

"Is that relevant?"

"It might be."

"Caddyshack."

"Oh very romantic."

"He reached over and started playing with my fingers. And before I knew it, we were...”

"Holding hands."

"Yeah."

"Very slick."

"I kind of got the feeling he'd done it before."

"Not with you though."

"Yeah."

"Did you talk about it?"

"Sort of."

"What does that mean?"

"We...discussed our mutual interests...indirectly."

"What are your mutual interests?"

"We're both single and horny."

"Ah. And you think that your intentions were clear?"

"What do you mean?"

"You think it was clear to him that your goal is to pursue a romantic or sexual relationship?"

"Yes."

"And were his intentions clear?"

"Yes."

“And yet you stopped at holding hands.”

“Yeah.”

"And you're okay with that?"

"Sure."

“Why?”

“I think he was a little weirded out by the fact that I didn’t shove him onto the floor and limp away screaming.”

“Perhaps it’s good to take it slow....work your way through all the bases, one by one.”

“…”

"If he'd kissed you, would you have kissed him back?"

"I think so."

"You're not sure?"

"Almost ninety-nine percent sure."

“Would you have had sex with him, if he’d have been willing?”

“More like seventy-five percent sure.”

"It's good that you can admit that now."

"Yeah."

"But you're okay with him taking it slow."

"Do I have a choice?"

"You might. You certainly do have influence over such things. But I think it's good to respect each other's wishes, especially so early on in your relationship."

"Not early. I've known him for over seventeen years."

"Early in your romantic relationship. This is all brand new. You might as well be strangers."

"True."

“And afterwards, you slept in the same bed?”

“No, actually. I slept in my own room.”

“Why?”

“I don’t know. I guess I was a little weirded out too.”

"This is a huge step for you both."

"Yeah."

"Your attraction to him has been officially declared, meaning that no matter what happens, the nature of your relationship will change in some fashion. It's already changed. There's no going back."

"..."

"Do you think he interpreted your sleeping in your own room as rejection?"

"No."

"How did he react to that decision?"

"He seemed...relieved."

"He did. Why do you think that is?"

"It was clear he was...I mean, I could tell that he was getting...aroused. And I don't think he's quite ready to..."

"Have sex with a you?"

"..."

"Because he knows that it will change things forever."

"They've already changed forever."

"I know that and you know that. But James has a hard time with changes, even if they're positive."

"..."

“But all of this if very good.”

“Yeah.”

"What do you want this to mean?"

"Why do always ask that? Why can't I just enjoy something, without you dismembering it?"

"That's kind of my job."

"..."

"And because I don't want you to get hurt."

"You know...for the first time maybe ever, I really don't care."

"About getting hurt?"

"Yeah."

"Good. That means that something is important enough to you that you're willing to take a risk."

"..."

"Does it help that he took the first step?"

"Yeah."

"There's more, isn't there? You did more than just hold hands."

"Why would you think that?"

"The look on your face, makes me think that you were intimate in some capacity."

"You don't think holding hands is intimate?"

"For most people it would be. But I think you did more than that."

"..."

"You did do more than just hold hands."

"..."

"And that's why you're really smiling."

"..."

"What is it?"

"It's...personal."

"Too personal to tell your therapist?"

"It's...I don't know. It's personal"

"You don't have to tell me. I'm just curious."

"Of course you are."

"Was it something that could be classified as...foreplay?"

"Actually no."

"..."

"Well...maybe. Depends."

"On what?"

"On whether or not you consider your ears to be an erogenous zone."

"Are your ears an erogenous zone?"

"..."

"Does he know that?"

"He does now."

"And you were aroused."

"..."

"Did he notice that you were aroused?"

"..."

"Perhaps that's why he stopped."

"Is that weird?"

"Is what weird?"

"Ears."

"Did it feel weird?"

"No."

"Then it wasn't."

"..."

"If it feels good, then it's good. You're not hurting anyone. It's not hurting anyone for him to...fondle various parts of your body, provided that he has your consent."

"I know that."

"Then why the guilt? It's almost like you feel guilty for enjoying something."

"I don't know."

"I think this is good. He took a risk too. He revealed a side of himself to you that you haven't seen before, and you both benefited."

"..."

"Would you like to see more of this side of him?"

"What do you think?""

"You really are happy."

"I think I am."

"So what do you want to talk about today, aside from your auditory hallucinations?"

"How...am I going to not screw this up?"

"How do you usually screw up your relationships?"

"By being an ass."

"In what capacity?"

"I...don't know."

"I think you do know."

"..."

"Let's take your relationship with Stacy."

"Oh let's not and say we did."

"What ended it?"

"The infarction."

"Okay, but that wasn't what ended the relationship. You had the infarction. Then she betrayed your trust and you couldn't forgive her. That's what ended the relationship."

"You're saying I should have forgiven her?"

"I'm saying you could have. I can't say whether or not you should have. She did something. She made a choice. You did something. You made a choice. That's what life is, Greg...a series of actions and reactions."

"Yeah."

"So exactly how did your lack of forgiveness manifest itself?"

"I told you, I was an ass."

"How were you an ass?"

"I was cruel."

"How?"

"Just...remarks, things I'd say."

"Like what?"

"I don't know. Nothing specific. Just random nastiness."

"I see."

"But I don't think that was really the worst thing."

"What was the worst thing?"

"I...kind of ignored her."

"In what sense?"

"She was rather self sufficient, independent."

"Explains why you got along so well."

"She wasn't very needy, emotionally. She didn't need me. And I didn't need her. We just...kind of used each other."

"But how did you go about ignoring her?"

"Towards the beginning I was attentive, flowers and all that. After...I kind of stopped talking to her, just disregarded her completely. I could tell there were things she wanted to discuss. I wouldn't give her the chance."

"You must have been in a lot of pain."

"I was."

"I don't mean physically."

"..."

"How do you feel about that?"

"About what?"

"Knowing that you were in pain and as a result, deliberately sabotaged your relationship."

"How am I supposed to feel about it?"

"It sounds like you have regrets."

"Yeah."

"Did you love her?"

"..."

"You're not sure?"

"I was in love with her."

"But did you love her?"

"I think...I loved her as much as I was capable of loving someone."

"That's an excellent answer."

"It's the truth."

"It's also a matter of perspective."

"..."

"If I'd asked you that question six months ago, your answer would have been quite different."

"Yeah."

"What would you have said?"

"I don't know."

"I'm very pleased with the progress you've made."

"..."

"So what do you think you might do to prevent making the same mistakes with James that you made with Stacy?"

"Communicate?"

"By what?"

"Talking?"

"Okay. What else?"

"I don't know. Smoke signals, Morse code?"

"If you talk, you must also listen."

"I listen."

"You do. You're a very good listener. I don't think I've ever told you that. Which is why I think that this relationship has a chance of working."

"..."

"It's okay to say thank you, Greg."

"Thank you."

"It's okay to feel good about yourself doing something well, doing something right, doing something better than you used to. That's okay. It's not smugness or vanity or ego. It's self awareness and self esteem."

"..."

“What do you think your father would say if he knew about the recent developments in your relationship with James?”

"Why would you ask that?"

"You know why."

“...”

“Maybe you already know what he would say. Maybe you’ve already heard it.”

“…”

“You said your father once accused you of being gay. How did he phrase that particular accusation?”

“I don’t remember.”

“Try.”

“I think...he called me a faggot.”

“Very original. Why do you think he did that?”

“Why does it matter?”

“Deflection tells me it’s probably embarrassing."

"..."

"Why don’t you just tell me and get it over with.”

“He…found some magazines.”

“Gay porn?”

“No, actually. They were just ordinary body building magazines. But there were men in them. I imagine some of them might have been gay.”

“And you were using these to become aroused?”

“No. I really was just interested in body building. I was skinnier than most of my classmates and wanted to bulk up.”

“Why do you think your father was so quick to arrive at the conclusion that you might be gay?”

"I don't know."

"Think about it."

“I never had any girlfriends.”

“Ever?”

“I’ve only had one real, long term relationship with a woman.”

“You mean Stacy."

"Yeah."

"And how old were you when you met?”

“Thirty-three. We lived together for five years.”

“Until the infarction.”

“We stayed together for five weeks after that.”

“Thirty-three is a bit old, to have never had a serious relationship."

"What can I say? I'm a late bloomer."

"Did you have any other relationships with women, even if they were brief?”

“I only went on a handful of dates in high school, most of which were set up by my parents. I dated several women in college. I had sex with quite a few. I just never…I wasn’t really committed to any of them. None of them were committed to me.”

“How many is quite a few?

“I don't remember.”

"Ballpark figure."

"More than thirty...less than fifty."

"That's a lot."

"I guess."

"Does that include any hookers?"

"Outside of that experience in Okinawa, I didn't have sex with any hookers until after the infarction."

"Would you consider yourself promiscuous?"

"Depends on how you're gauging it."

"How would you gauge it?"

"No...I mean some people might think so. But no, it didn't feel like it."

“Why so many partners?”

“I don’t know.”

"You were looking for something that I'm guessing you didn't find."

"..."

"Ever the same woman twice?"

"A few times."

"And no men?"

"Why do you keep asking me that?"

"Because I'm hoping that eventually you'll feel comfortable enough to tell me the truth."

"..."

"I'm right, right?"

"Do I have to talk about this? Do you really need to know everything?"

"No and no. But the more I know, the more I can help you."

"I'm not talking about this."

"Why not?"

"Because it's completely irrelevant."

"I think it's very relevant. I think you think it's relevant. I think that's why you're so reluctant to discuss it."

"..."

"I think it's safe to say that this is somehow related to your auditory hallucinations."

"..."

"Who was it?"

"Just a guy."

"One guy?"

"Yes."

"Anyone in particular?"

"He was my room mate during undergrad."

"The one you said you kissed."

"Yeah."

"And how did that start?"

"How does anything start?"

"I assume there was beer involved."

"Rum, actually. His girlfriend broke up with him. We were twenty years old. He was upset...crying. Which was weird enough all by itself. We started out drinking and smoking pot and ended up cuddling in his bed."

"Interesting transition."

"That's why they call it dope."

"So you were uncomfortable with him being so openly emotional and your desire to comfort him was motivated by that."

"That and the rum, yeah."

"And then you had sex?"

"No."

"No?"

"Not that time."

"When?"

"He started asking me to sleep with him. He'd get all weepy and say he was lonely and depressed and I'd...give in."

"Interesting."

"What is?"

"That you'd give in to that. What was in it for you?"

"I don't know...body heat?

"You must have been attracted to him, in some capacity."

"..."

"Was he good looking?"

"He was...kind of cute, I guess."

"So you eventually started...fondling one another."

"Kind of. I woke up one night and he was basically humping my leg."

"What did you do?"

"I was freaked at first. Then I realized..."

"You had an erection."

"Yeah."

"So you...humped back."

"Not right away. But...yeah, basically."

"And it never went further than that?"

"It did."

"And?"

"And, I don't want to talk about it."

"Why not?"

"I just don't."

"What did you do that you're so ashamed of?"

"..."

"This is shame I'm seeing. This is guilt. This is someone who did something that he thinks he shouldn't have done. What exactly do you feel guilty about? It sounds like he was using you, not the other way around."

"He was...Crandall was a people pleaser, the type of guy who would bend over backwards for you...give you the shirt off his back, whether you deserved it or not."

"Those are good qualities."

"He was incredibly naive."

"So you feel like you took advantage of him in some capacity."

"The reason his girlfriend broke up with him...is because I slept with her."

"Why would you do that?"

"They were having problems. He asked me for help. I agreed to talk to her, smooth things over between them. One thing led to another. She cried. I held her. Before I knew it, it was morning and we were naked."

"So you didn't plan it."

"No."

"I see. That's why you feel guilty."

"No..."

"Then why?"

"I told you that he would ask me to sleep in his bed. I'm not a real cuddly person. So after a while, I kind of got tired of it. It was hard sleeping next to him every night, rubbing up against him..."

"Not getting any real relief."

"I told him I'd keep sleeping with him if he...you know."

"Compensated you in some fashion."

"Yeah."

"How did you request that he compensate you?"

"How do you think?"

"By what, performing oral sex?"

"Yeah."

"Did he?"

"Yes."

"Voluntarily?"

"Not...exactly."

"So you feel like you forced him."

"I did force him...sort of."

"How?"

"He was doing it voluntarily. He actually seemed to be enjoying it. But he told me in advance that he didn't want to...you know."

"Swallow."

"Yeah."

"A reasonable request."

"So he made me promise to tell him before...so he could..."

"Prevent you from ejaculating into his mouth."

"Yeah."

"I take it you didn't?"

"I didn't. I just...pretended it was an accident."

"Was he mad?"

"Not really. He just looked embarrassed."

"I don't think that's too terrible."

"Yeah well, I did it several more times. And he fell for it every time."

"Why do you think you did that?"

"I don't know."

"Swallowing another person's semen, while disgusting, is also a sign of intimacy and trust. Perhaps you thought the only way you'd be privy to such treatment is by forcing someone. Perhaps you didn't think someone would voluntarily extend to you, that sort of intimacy or trust."

"Maybe."

"Did you ever give him oral sex?"

"No."

"Did he ever ask you to?"

"Yes."

"Why did you say no?"

"..."

"You were afraid he'd do the same thing to you that you'd done to him."

"More or less."

"Did you ever go further than that?"

"What do you mean?"

"Did you ever have intercourse?"

"No."

"Did you ever ask to?"

"Sort of."

"How did he respond to that?"

"I was drunk. I asked if I could...you know...fuck him."

"Why?"

"I was horny. He was there. Seemed...convenient."

"I take it he said no."

"He was afraid, I think."

"Of what."

"Pain probably. I don't know."

"How did you react to him saying no?"

"I begged, rather pathetically."

"And he gave in?"

"No. He never caved. And after about the third or forth time giving me oral, he refused to...again."

"He refused to give you oral?"

"No."

"Oh...he refused to swallow your semen."

"Yeah."

"Did he say why?"

"The obvious reasons. I'm sure it doesn't taste good."

"So you've never tasted it?"

"I tasted my own once."

"When?"

"When I was about thirteen."

"Why?"

"Just curious."

"Interesting. So it sounds like the Crandall person stood up for himself, Greg. He maintained boundaries. He wasn't a victim."

"..."

"Did you fool around at all after that?"

"We'd still sleep together. Not every night. Just...whenever. We never talked about it. We'd just kind of climb into bed together, turn out the lights, make out, dry hump each other, get up and change our clothes and go back to sleep."

"How many times did you do that?"

"Too many to count."

"I thought you said you only kissed him once."

"Yeah...I obviously lied."

"I had a feeling. But why?"

"Because I didn't want to talk about it."

"Do you feel better now that you have?"

"Do I have to answer that?"

"Not directly."

"Yeah, I guess I do feel better."

"Certainly explains why you never had any girlfriends though, if you were always sleeping with your room mate."

"He did."

"He'd continue sleeping with you, even though he had other...conquests."

"Yes."

"Were they aware that you two were sleeping together also?"

"No."

"Was anyone aware?"

"I don't think so."

"I can't imagine that didn't damage your self esteem."

"I just figured he was confused. I don't think he was ever really gay."

"But you are?"

"I told you, I never really thought of myself as gay or straight."

"Maybe he didn't either."

"He loved women, especially plus sized women with large breasts."

"He apparently loved men as well."

"I don't think he ever slept with any other men."

"Perhaps you were special."

"Not special enough."

"So that's what this is about. You feel slighted. You cared about him and he refused to be exclusive with you. You were a dirty secret that he felt the need to hide."

"..."

"And you assume that means something about you and not him. He wasn't comfortable with his own sexuality. Between that and the disapproval from your father, do you think that you might be projecting some of those feelings of rejection onto your current situation?"

"I don't know."

"Bear in mind that if your room mate was fooling around with you, he was never really exclusive with anyone else either."

"Yeah."

"Also...he was okay with you knowing about them. But didn't want them knowing about you. We hide that which we're trying to protect and preserve. Not the other way around."

"You hide things you don't want anyone to know about. Am I supposed to be flattered?"

"So perhaps you're ashamed, not because of the homosexual nature of these activities, but because of what you think they imply about your character. You think you're not worthy of exclusivity. You think you're something that needs to be hidden or concealed."

"..."

"Did you love him?"

"He was a good friend."

"That's not an answer."

"Yeah...sure."

"Were you in love with him?"

"I don't know. Maybe at some point."

"Did you ever feel as strongly about him as you do about James?"

"Probably...but not for very long."

"Why not?"

"Just...I don't know."

"Maybe because while you cared about him, you never felt like it was completely mutual."

"I was convenient."

"Because you lived together."

"Only the first year. After that, we got an apartment with some other guys."

"Instead of living in the dorms. Why?"

"I was tired of living in the dorms, being told when I could come and go, how late I could stay up and all that."

"But why get an apartment with him?"

"Didn't want to break in a new room mate."

"So it was a choice. The more convenient option would have been just to stay in the dorms."

"So?"

"So...I don't think he was with you out of convenience."

"He wasn't with me at all."

"You were together physically."

"Not the same thing."

"You value the intellectual over the physical."

"...."

That's interesting."

"..."

"Thus bringing me back to the reason for your auditory hallucinations."

"..."

"I think what you're hearing is psychologically based. I think you've repressed a lot of shame about your sexuality and you're having a hard time because now you're actually facing it. You're living out those fantasies that you've been so uncomfortable with over the years. And that's scary."

"..."

"Have you considered sharing any of this with James?"

"No."

"Does he even know that you're hearing voices?"

"I don't want to worry him. And the part about Crandall, he just wouldn't understand."

"You think he'd prefer to believe he was your first?"

"For the sake of his ego? God, yes."

"Keeping secrets is what will inevitably worry him."

"Not if he doesn't know they're being kept."

"Either way, I'm not authorizing the use of ECT. We'll simply discuss the related issues until the auditory hallucinations subside."

"And what if they don't?"

"I bet you one hundred dollars that they will."

"How long do we have to discuss them for?"

"In one calendar month, if they're not gone, I will give you one hundred dollars."

"You're on, doc."

"You don't mind betting on your own recovery?"

"Either I'll lose the hallucinations, or I'll gain a hundred bucks. Sounds like a win-win to me."