Author: The EB's PM
A Twisted tale of obsession.When a womans life is left shattered. Transforming her into sloth like creature, what happens when loneliness leads to an obsession with Twilight and that obsession soon becomes a reality... for everyone!Rated: Fiction M - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 7 - Words: 7,208 - Reviews: 23 - Favs: 4 - Follows: 3 - Published: 08-10-09 - id: 5290564
|A+ A- Full 3/4 1/2 Expand Tighten|
A/N: So here it is our first full on collaboration with all The EB's!
Misery / Twilight cross over. A Twisted tale of obsession. When a woman's husband dies in a snow accident her life is left shattered. Transforming her into sloth like creature, losing touch with reality her only contact with the outside world is done online. What happens when loneliness leads to an obsession with Twilight and that obsession soon becomes a reality.... for everyone!
Disclaimer: We do not own Twilight or anything else Stephenie Meyers related, all characters in this story are fictional and bare no resemblance to any factual person. Purely done for fun.
It was beautiful winter day down at the cabin on the edge of the mountain; surrounded by a thick layer of snow and with more due to fall later that evening Bug thought it was the perfect chance to take his beautiful wife out sledging.
"Honey, are you up? It's time to go!" Bug hollered upstairs. His wife wasn't lazy just a little slow and a little large. He used to joke before they got married that one day she would turn into Jabba the Hutt with all the pizza's she would wolf down. It became his pet name for her.
He grabbed his khaki jacket and rubber boots and started to climb the stairs and was stopped but the sound of footsteps. At the top of the stairs stood his beloved Hutt. For a large lady she carried off khaki polka dots pants and a sleeveless button down well.
"I'm here and ready to roll my sweet little Bug. Let's go sledging!"
"Please put on a sweater Hutty Butty, I don't want you catching a chill." Bug replied checking out his wife's bulging fun bags.
Hutt made her way downstairs grabbing a sweater and coat from the stand by the door, slithered into her red rubber boots and made her way outside.
Bug quickly followed suit.
They had been married for so long now, almost 10 years and they had been blissful. They lived in a little cabin by themselves with a few cats whom they loved and cherished like they were their children.
But all this happiness was not to last, as they made their way to the top of the steep slope they began their sledging fun.
"Push me down hard this time Hutty Butty! I wanna go real fast this time...."
FIVE YEARS LATER.
It was another cold night at the Hutt's home down on the edge of the mountain surrounded by a thick layer of snow. There was supposed to be a wicked storm by this time the next day but the Hutt had been through these snow storms before.
Nothing moved the Hutt anymore. You see, the Hutt was once in love with a handsome man named Bug. But one day Bug died during a horrible accident. The two of them were taking their sled down their favorite slope by the Hutt's home but tragically their sled flipped ramming him head-first into a tree. The Hutt never cleaned the blood from that tree. She would always have that stain to remember him by and would never wash it off for any reason.
The Hutt was absolutely heartbroken when this happened and needed something new in her life. Her cats were never any comfort anymore. She barely even noticed their deaths until she caught herself wearing their dead bodies on her feet instead of her slippers.
"I need something new.." said the Hutt every day.
Finally she went down to the local market in the nearby town and found a second hand copy of Meyer's Twilight. Before the Hutt knew it the Twilight world had consumed her. It was all she cared about, perhaps a replacement for her beloved Bug.
Time went on and the Hutt lost interest in everything else. All she cared about was proving rumors on a website named the Internet Movie Database and her favorite snack: chocolate covered ants.
You see, the combination of unproved Twilight rumors and chocolate covered ants combined caused the Hutt's skin to turn itself inside out. When the Hut finally pulled herself away from her favorite online fanfic one evening she caught a glimpse of herself in the mirror and to her absolute horror she had become what appeared to look exactly like the creature known as Pizza/Jabba the Hutt.
Since that fateful day in her lonely old home the Hutt has never found the courage to slosh her way down the steps of her home and into town. No one could see her this way.
storm was starting to sneak up on her now. So much more early than
"I should make a run to get some toilet paper.." Her year supply from costco had run out weeks ago and she had been using her dead cats this entire time but winter was now coming harder than ever and she would not get another chance.
But what the Hutt didn't not know was what she would find on her way to costco. A surprise that would affect her life forever..